Home to You

by Robyn Carr

  Was it near the town of Chico? Gail couldn’t remember that, either.

  Simon came out of the bathroom, froze as soon as he saw his father, then flipped his hair out of his eyes and ambled toward him. “What a surprise,” he drawled.

  Tex acknowledged him with a brief tilt of the head. “Must be, considering you disappeared without letting anyone know where you were going.”

  The belligerent attitude that had become synonymous with Simon over the past couple of years reasserted itself. His eyes glittered; his chin jutted forward. The transformation was so marked and immediate it caught Gail off guard. Obviously just seeing his father was enough to drag him into a dark place.

  “So...how did you find me?” Simon asked.

  “Ian finally got tired of me busting his balls and gave me the information I was after. But he said not to tell you it was him.”

  “So of course you out him first thing.”

  His father studied him for a second. “I’m not in the business of protecting Ian.”

  “No, that would require looking beyond your own concerns. But I’m afraid harassing my business manager was a waste of your time. It would’ve been smarter to call me.”

  “Why would I bother?” he said. “You won’t pick up for me.”

  Simon shoved a hand through his hair. “Most people would take that as a sign and not show up on my doorstep.”

  “Ordinarily, I’d leave you in peace. You’ve made your wishes clear where I’m concerned.” He tipped his hat to punctuate his words. “But this isn’t personal. It’s business. If you weren’t my lead actor, I’d be banging on someone else’s door.”

  A muscle flexed in Simon’s cheek. “Your lead actor? What the hell are you talking about?”

  With a condescending chuckle, Tex stepped forward. “You don’t know? Man, you really have been in a world of hurt. I’m bankrolling your next film.”

  “No. Frank and Jimmy Kozlowski are bankrolling it.”

  “Together with a few other investors, and I happen to be one of them.”

  Nostrils flaring, Simon clenched his jaw. When he spoke, it sounded like he forced each word through his teeth. “You put up money for Hellion? Your name has never been mentioned in connection with the project.”

  Tex gave a careless shrug. “Ian knew when I came on board. I’ve never made a secret of it.”

  Gail felt her fingernails curve into her palms. Good old Ian, playing both ends against the middle. What had he been thinking? That Simon would never find out his father was involved?

  That wasn’t realistic. He must’ve been hoping the movie would be done by the time Simon learned. That was certainly possible. When there were a number of producers, a group of investors, not all of them had a say in the actual making of the film.

  “Why?” Simon asked. “There are so many other projects, so many other actors. Why are you involved in this?”

  “Frankly, it was the kind of opportunity I didn’t want to pass up. A script like this doesn’t come around every day. And you couldn’t be more suited to the part.”

  Disgust etched lines in Simon’s forehead. “I’m playing a serial killer, for God’s sake!”

  “But he’s a good husband and father at the same time, very complex. That’s what makes him interesting and I’m sure it’s why you took the part. Anyway, not too many actors have more box office appeal than you do right now. We wait much longer, that might not be the case. So how can I convince you to get your ass back to work?”

  Now Simon laughed. “You can’t. I’m not going back until I gain custody of Ty.”

  “You won’t get Ty. You’ve already made sure of that.”

  Simon folded his arms. “I wonder where I learned the behavior that brought me to this point.”

  “It’s not your behavior I’m trying to understand. It’s why you didn’t bother to be more discreet.”

  “Maybe I’m not interested in becoming the Great Pretender, like you.”

  “If you had any brains you wouldn’t be in this situation. You had Bella by the jugular, and you let her go. No one knows that better than me.”

  “That you could even suggest I go public with what happened, after the part you played, makes me want to kick your ass,” Simon growled. “You were probably hoping I’d do just that. Give you a spot in the limelight again.”

  Tex waved his words away. “Oh, come on, your marriage to Bella would never have lasted, regardless of anything I did. It was already on the rocks.” He gestured toward Gail. “This one won’t last, either. One woman could never keep you happy, not when just about every female you come across is willing to lie down and spread her legs. You’re too much like me.”

  Gail felt sick. “Out,” she said. “Get out of our house. Now.”

  Simon grabbed her by the arm before she could get in Tex’s face. “I’m nothing like you, and I’m going to prove it.”

  His father adjusted his hat. “Knock yourself out,” he said. “But understand this—you have three days. I’ll be staying at the B and B on Sutter Street until Tuesday. You don’t make arrangements with me to start that damn film, I’ll sue you for breach of contract and hire someone else. We’ll see if the publicity from that helps you get Ty back. The judge and everyone else will think, ‘Simon screwed up again, just like we figured he would.’ Then hiding out here in the back of beyond will be a waste of time. Why not be realistic while you have the chance?”

  “While it serves you, you mean?” Simon said. “While it gives you a film that’ll make you millions more than if you hired another actor?”

  “The people I talked into signing on are upset at the way this thing is going. I owe them something, too.”

  “But who do you owe more?” Gail asked. “Don’t you care about your grandson? Don’t you want a better relationship with him than you have with your son?”

  Tex shifted his attention to her. “I think you shouldn’t get involved,” he said, and stalked out.

  * * *

  Rage consumed Simon. His father’s nerve in showing up here and acting as if...as if he’d had nothing to do with the situation that had started everything made Simon want to put his fist through a wall.

  “You okay?” Gail’s voice came to him as if from far away. He knew she meant well, that she was trying to help him, but he couldn’t be with her right now. Considering the rage bubbling up inside him, he couldn’t be with anyone he hoped to have a relationship with afterward because there’d be no way to take back the things he was about to say.

  “I need to get out of here,” he muttered.

  She stood in his path. “And go where? You don’t even know the area.”

  “Who cares?”

  “I do.”

  “Then you’re a fool. And you’ll live to regret it. Get out of my way.”

  “No. If you leave now you’ll do something you regret.”

  On some level, he agreed with her. He thought of Ty and wanted to make him proud. But even his son wasn’t enough to stem the deluge of anger whipping through him. Because trying to reclaim Ty felt like he was grasping at air. His father was right; he’d never get his son back.

  He needed a liquor store, some way to dull the jagged emotions that felt like barbed wire being yanked through his heart. If he didn’t do something he’d explode—or finally give his old man what he deserved. He wanted to do exactly that, but if he ever started down that road, he’d wind up in prison. He doubted he’d be able to quit slugging him.

  He tried to get around Gail, but she stopped him. “No!” she said more firmly. “I won’t let him take from you what you’ve achieved during these past two and a half weeks.”

  “I don’t give a shit about what I’ve achieved. I don’t give a shit about anything!” He thought his temper would frighten her. It’d certainly frighte
ned her when he’d stormed into her office following that bogus rape accusation. But she didn’t let go or back away, even when he tried to shake her off.

  “I’m not giving up on you, damn it!” she cried. “Don’t let him win!”

  “You have no choice but to give up. Our marriage—this joke of a relationship—is over.” Determined to get through the door, he picked her up and set her aside. But she came after him again, catching his arm. When he whirled, ready to shout—to say whatever he had to say to get her to accept who and what he really was—she grabbed his hand and shoved it up her shirt.

  “Stay,” she breathed.

  The shock of suddenly having her breast in his hand shot straight to his groin. He told himself it wasn’t right to take her up on the offer she was making. Not when he knew why she was making it. But the anger was like a monster inside him, a monster with a mind of its own. It demanded some kind of physical action, a release....

  Still, he hesitated for a second and almost let go. He respected her too much to use her. But there was more than anger at work. He also wanted her—badly. And when her hand clenched in his hair and she turned his head to kiss him as if she wouldn’t take no for an answer, he knew he wouldn’t be able to refuse.

  Especially when she met his lips with an open mouth and arched into him, holding nothing back.

  Twenty-Three

  Gail had never experienced anything even close to what was happening. The emotions flying between her and Simon were so charged they seemed to be sparking. Desperate to come together as fast as possible, they tore at each other’s T-shirts, managed to remove them and, naked from the waist up, feasted on each other’s mouths, necks and chests—gasping for breath in between.

  Gail felt as if she’d just climbed aboard a runaway train. The crash was coming. But she wasn’t tempted to jump off. Not yet. Everything had changed. It didn’t matter that they were only temporarily married. It didn’t matter that sex was against the rules she’d established. It didn’t matter that it was full daylight and, after spending the night in Simon’s sleeping bag, she didn’t look her best. She was keeping him safe. That was all she cared about.

  Fortunately, he was too preoccupied with touching and tasting her to notice that her hair was messy. And she was too busy enjoying the pleasure he gave her to be self-conscious.

  When Simon lifted her in his arms, she warned him not to pull out his stitches, but he didn’t seem concerned. He carried her to the mattress, yanked her pajama bottoms off and buried his face in her breasts while touching her in other, more sensitive areas.

  “I wish I had better use of my right hand,” he muttered, but he was doing just fine with his left.

  Recalling all the fantasies she’d had over the years that centered on Simon O’Neal, Gail could hardly believe this was real. Especially because Simon in the flesh was so much sexier than the Simon in her dreams. He was far more aggressive than either of her former lovers—more demanding, too—but he was also careful not to take it too far. She could sense whenever he’d draw back, when he’d check her expression and responsiveness to make sure she was enjoying how he touched her.

  They were both walking on the far edge of control and there wasn’t a more exhilarating feeling. Gail had never let herself go to this point. She couldn’t pull back, didn’t even want to.

  “I was wrong about you,” he told her, his voice husky as he spread her legs.

  She could barely speak. She was trembling as she clung to his arm, already close to climax. “In what...way?”

  “In every way.” His mouth descended on hers, mimicking what he was doing with his fingers until she stopped him.

  “I want you inside me,” she whispered. “I can’t wait. It feels like I’ve been waiting forever for the man I could desire this much.”

  His gaze locked on to hers. She wasn’t sure if he was still angry, but there was a feral look in his eyes. He got up to get a condom from his wallet and put it on. But then he pinned her arms above her head and covered her with his hard, warm body.

  Gail allowed her eyes to close at the solid weight of him, the delicious pressure as he pushed inside. She was lost. She hadn’t protected herself against anything. She’d fallen head over heels for a man who was emotionally damaged and she’d done it in record time. Probably because, despite what she’d tried to tell herself, she’d been halfway in love with Simon from the beginning. Matt had been a schoolgirl crush by comparison, someone she’d only thought she wanted.

  A trickle of fear ran through her as that truth crystallized. Because an even harder truth came right behind it. Simon was going to break her heart, and that wouldn’t take very long, either. But as the friction increased and the tension mounted, future pain wasn’t a concern. She’d never made love like this before because she’d never felt like this before. Despite all the reasons she shouldn’t be, she was desperately in love, and her body knew Simon’s touch, could distinguish it from anyone else’s.

  As she reached that first peak, with Simon’s smell and body in and around her, she felt as if her bones would melt and somehow meld with his. She looked up to see him watching her. He was soaking up every nuance of her expression, reveling in every gasp, and the smile of accomplishment that curved his lips in that moment was probably the best part of all.

  * * *

  Simon was shaking with the effort of holding back, but he was determined to bring Gail to climax several times before allowing himself the same pleasure. He liked feeling her shudder when she reached that crest, liked hearing her moan his name. But he knew he was being unselfish partly to escape the guilt. He no longer had a heart to offer, so he had to deliver where he could.

  He happened to be good at this. Today he was too worked up to have the stamina he wanted, but he was doing what he could to last.

  “Again,” he whispered, and closed his eyes. He needed to think of something other than the warm wetness, the clenching of her body, or it would all be over. But she didn’t seem happy that he had to mentally check out in order to make that happen.

  Encouraging him to roll onto his back, she got on top and that was the beginning of the end. When she took control, he could believe she was making love to him because she wanted the pleasure as badly as he did and would have no regrets—and that was all it took to render him helpless.

  As soon as his hands found her breasts, wave after glorious wave ripped through him. Closing his eyes again, he succumbed to the release until he felt completely drained. Then he looked up at her, still breathing hard. He had no idea what to expect next. He was terrified she’d start to cry, feel angry that they’d broken her “rules,” cling to him as if this was the beginning of forever, or—worse than anything—make him squirm by telling him she loved him.

  Fortunately, she did none of those things. With a devilish smile, she bent her head for a quick peck that ended with a playful bite on his bottom lip.

  “Not bad,” she said. “Not bad at all.”

  He raised an uncertain eyebrow. “You’ve had better than that?” He certainly hadn’t. Not in recent memory. Maybe it was because he hadn’t been drunk, for a change, but he already knew he’d never forget this.

  “A couple times.” Her manner suggested she might be teasing, but he couldn’t be sure. “Anyway, I think you’re talented enough to make the two years we’re married go a lot faster.”

  He still wasn’t convinced she felt as cavalier as she was acting, but he was willing to play along. “You thought I might not be?”

  “I thought you needed a break from your stud services, but... I’m glad I decided not to worry about that,” she said. Then she got up and headed into the bathroom as if what had happened was nothing more than a casual encounter.

  Thank God. Covering his face with one arm, Simon breathed a sigh of relief.

  * * *

  Pressing h
erself against the bathroom door, Gail covered her face. She was shaking and couldn’t seem to calm down. But she wouldn’t let Simon know how deeply their lovemaking had affected her. He wasn’t capable of dealing with anything that complicated right now, even if he cared about her. And she knew he didn’t. Not in the same way she cared about him.

  “What have I done?” she mouthed as she stared at herself in the mirror. But it was too late for regret or remonstrance. At the very least, she was infatuated with Simon. Now that she wasn’t caught up in the moment, she was reluctant to call it love. Even if it was, she could still salvage her pride.

  “Gail?”

  He was outside the door.

  She hurried to flush the toilet, even though she hadn’t used it. “Yes?”

  “You okay?”

  “Of course. Why?”

  “Just wanted to be sure.”

  “I’m fine. Thanks. You definitely know how to show a lady a good time.” She bit her lip, forcing herself to stop talking before she gave away the fact that she was completely thrown by what had just happened.

  “Good. Glad to hear it. Let’s take a shower.”

  He wanted more. And, heaven help her, so did she.

  * * *

  Their first encounter hadn’t been bad, not by any stretch of the imagination. But, thanks to practice and a growing familiarity, sex with Simon got even more enjoyable as the weekend wore on. Gail was surprised at how quickly she became comfortable with the intimacy and how easily she lost her self-consciousness. She’d been so worried about comparing unfavorably to his other lovers, but that was crazy. If their relationship wasn’t going to last, what did it matter?

  Other than a short stint here and there when they ran out to buy food and more condoms, they’d spent the weekend holed up in the house, making love, sleeping and eating. Ironically, it felt like a real honeymoon. Gail knew Josh would love to hear the dirty details of the past two days, but she planned to give Simon the same respect and privacy she was counting on from him. As if to confirm that, she ignored Josh’s call when it came in.