“Gatis is dangerous?” She laid down and snuggled in the blankets. “The crazy part is—there’s so much I don’t remember from the last few months.” She squinted her eyes as if that would fill in the blank spots in her memory.
“I guess you got carried away.” Sarma smiled. “Reinis knows him from Latvia. He warned me months ago . . . I called to tell you.” Sarma sipped some tea. The mix of chamomile and lemon balm soothed her.
“How did you end up with Reinis? Did you give him your number before we left Latvia?” Marita pressed her fingers to her temples.
“Long story. It’s too much to talk about right now.”
Marita peeked around the room. “I need some things. I have nothing here.”
“We'll go tomorrow.” Sarma placed the mug on the bedside table and combed her fingers through Marita's hair, grateful her friend was back.
~ * ~
Dita floated through the door of House of the Black Swan manor with Gatis walking by her side. At the end of the hall, she couldn’t stand the sight of the eight elders perched on their wooden so-called thrones, staring down their noses at her. As if they were so great. Disgusting the lot of them. She landed before them without a sound, and Gatis halted next to her.
Aivars sat dead center in his usual spot with his sister Agnese. She’d never bow down to the coward, oldest vampire in Latvia or not. He should have defended her years ago when Laima stole her heartmate and destroyed their original coven. She sneered at Laima and Miervaldis who sat to one side of Aivars. Both of them stared at her, expressionless. Not after what she had to say.
“What have you come here for?” Aivars inquired.
“House of the White Swan, present. Reinis breached the rules. He has feelings for Sarma, the bestower. He imprinted her,” Dita announced. She couldn’t be sure, but it seemed the corner of Laima’s mouth twitched when she spoke and she gripped the chair’s arms tighter. A surprise to her?
Aivars didn’t blink or move at all. “Do you have proof of this?”
Gatis nodded. “I saw Reinis with the bestower, and he had a clear imprint. He defended Sarma like a heartmate.”
On the outside, Dita’s face remained stoic. On the inside, she smiled with glee, relishing the moment. She glanced at Laima. Her so called sister frowned and her finger tips rubbed the chair carvings.
Aivars looked over Gatis’ face. “Reinis did this to you?”
Gatis reddened and dropped his face to the ground.
“Reinis did that to my son. He's in love with the human and needs to be punished. You cannot allow this to continue, Aivars.” Dita’s long dress draped around her feet.
“Out! Get out!” Laima leaped from her chair. “You disgust me!”
Miervaldis held Laima back, then silently met her eyes. Dita hated her brother as well. None of them had ever helped her a day in her life and they were all going to pay.
“Prove it, Dita.” Laima sat back down and covered her mouth with her hand. Aivars frowned at Laima. “Prove my son broke our laws.”
“We are two sides of the same family, two houses with our own covens, Laima, but we have the same laws.” Dita’s facial muscles strained. “Aivars, you will see. You’re little coven isn’t what you think it is. As we speak, one of your best is compromising your future. And believe me, I will bring proof.”
“We will investigate your declaration, Dita. You are excused,” Aivars responded.
Except for her brother, all other elders shot a questioning frown at Laima.
Dita swallowed her chuckle as she turned with her son trailing behind her. That look on Laima’s face paid for her pain for the last five hundred years. For once, Dita had the upper hand.
Chapter 35
The scents of bacon, eggs, and blueberry pancakes filled the air. Confused, Sarma tied up her hair, slipped on her pajamas, then stumbled into the cabin’s kitchen. Next to the stove, Reinis flipped a pancake onto a steaming stack. He peered over his shoulder as she approached. The entire countertop was dusted with mix, eggs shells, and empty packages. As usual, his hair stood on end and danced around as he maneuvered the food.
“A vampire that cooks.” Sarma giggled, crossing her arms.
“I was going to bring you breakfast in bed, but you beat me to it,” he answered, carrying the plate to the table.
“Have you always known how to cook?” she asked, raising an eyebrow. But inside, her heart melted. He remembered what she’d ordered in Big Sur.
“I’ve never done this before, but while I sat in the tree outside your place for months, I watched a ton of videos on my phone,” he said, placing the last of the food on the table. “Eat.”
“Yes, sir.” Dubious but hungry, Sarma piled the food onto her plate while he sat across from her. “You going to try anything?”
“Coffee, and I guess a pancake.” He served himself as she chewed.
“Watching videos on your phone? If you were a security guard, you’d be fired.” She stuffed a bite into her mouth.
“I can multi-task.” He flicked an eyebrow and shot her a half smile.
“I’ve seen that.” A sensuous snap of sparks rushed through her. “I guess that’s how Gatis got through?”
“Not fair. I had to feed.” He met her eyes with a serious expression. “Speaking of . . . how’s the food?”
“It’s delicious, especially for a first try. Thank you.” The pancakes came out a little dry, but the bacon and eggs were exactly how she liked them. Reinis noticed everything, even the tiny details. He sipped his coffee and peered at her over the mug. He’d been under so much pressure and his obligations forced him to be dishonest with her. It wasn’t fair to hold a grudge forever.
Sarma swallowed the last bite. “Where’s Marita?”
“She’s asleep in the other cabin. I can sense her from here. I left her some food. Let her rest.” Reinis stood up and came around the table, pulling her chair out. “I want to show you something.”
“More multi-tasking?” Sarma scanned his body, head to toe, and noticed his pajamas.
“The best kind.” Without warning, he lifted her off the chair, shoved everything out of the way, and placed her in front of him on the table. He grasped her nightshirt’s hem and pulled it over her head. Taking her chin in his hand, he swept his tongue into her mouth and slipped off her bottoms.
Sarma fumbled to remove his pants, but he did it for her, and with a swift movement, breached her thighs until he was all the way in. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he scooped her up and carried her off to bed.
Was it a minute or an hour that passed? Unsure, Reinis opened his eyes and enjoyed how relaxed Sarma was in his arms after sex.
“Es tevi mīlu,” he whispered.
“What’s that mean?” she murmured, brushing her face against his.
“I love you.” Bare skin to skin, he cherished these moments with her. Whatever discipline awaited him, every ounce of her presence made it beyond worth it.
“I love you, too.”
Reinis lay next to her, one arm sprawled across her stomach. He breathed softly on her neck. She cradled him and ran her fingers over his stubble. His long lashes curled down.
“You’re as beautiful as your name. Do remember that I told you its meaning, Sarma?”
“Remind me again.”
“Hoarfrost—the delicate ice that gathers in the early morning on all the plants.”
“Wow, it is lovely.”
“But you’re lovelier.”
She blushed and interlaced her fingers with his, then her eyes darkened. “Reinis, you really care about this baby, don’t you?”
“You can’t imagine how much. My mother and aunt have been warring for 500 years. All vampires fight and Auseklis is the one who is supposed to bring us back together. As I told you before, we’re on the brink of extinction. But now that this involves you, the person I love, I care for the child even more. He will be our child.” He sat up, the blanket slipping around his waist, exposing his beautiful c
hest and abs.
“I don’t have family. My father died when I was a child, and my mother’s family is all dead as well, except for one aunt, Marita’s mom. We don’t have contact, though. I have no one, so I would never fight with a real sister if I had one. That’s sad, Reinis, to live forever like you do and fight with your family.” She caressed his pectoral muscle and ran the tip of her finger over his bicep.
“That’s why Auseklis means so much to us . . . to me. They say he will bring light and unity to vampires. That’s what his name means, Morning Star.”
Sarma touched her own abdomen. “He sounds special, but I’m still not sure about this.”
“I was born 200 years ago. Infighting is all I’ve ever known. My mother suffers because of her broken family. She rarely talks about it. Things worsened after they killed my father, because she didn’t have him to depend on. She lost the love of her life. She lost her sister as well. Auseklis will bring hope.”
“You’re old.” Sarma giggled. “Where do vampires come from anyway?”
“I’m not that old. My mother’s 800. Our stories tell us we’re children of creation, having lived on this earth for thousands of years. We have a soul and life like everything else.”
“But I’m mortal, Reinis.” Her eyes went serious as she met his.
“I admit I haven’t worked out all the details. But I know what I want and need. It’s you.” He didn’t avert his eyes.
“You still want me to be Auseklis’ mother? I’m human, Reinis. Weaker than you.”
Reinis pulled her close. “More than ever. I love you, Sarma. I want my blood and your blood to mix inside you. Besides, you have advantages you don’t know about. You can go into the sun. I had to build up a slow immunity. Half-bloods adapt faster.” He kissed her lips and caressed her hand with his fingers.
“I don’t understand. Doesn’t your coven want us together? Don’t they want Auseklis to have a mother and father together?” She pushed him back, her forehead wrinkled.
He stared at the ceiling, his jaw tense. “I wish I had answers. Usually, we take the children. I know it’s wrong, but even the strongest, purest female vampire bodies can’t take having too many children. Many pregnancies don’t survive, just like what happened to you. We literally face extinction. My mother and sister would have been mothers to him, along with other females in our family, and the males his fathers. That’s how all our offspring are raised.”
Settling between her legs, his face sideways against her stomach, he cradled his body between her legs. He had never been so intimate with a woman of any kind before. Duty sex plenty of times, but this sort of closeness, never.
“I wonder what I would do if faced with your situation.” She ran her fingers through his hair, rubbing the shorter sides. “But I still ask myself why you take them away, Reinis.”
Pain in her voice saddened him.
“When the children are born, even though they’re half-bloods, they cannot be exposed to sunlight. They’ll get third-degree burns. We have a process to slowly expose them.”
“But what if the mother agreed to become like you?” She caressed his neck.
“It doesn’t work. We tried that. Very few survived the transition, and many humans lost their minds. Some found a way to commit suicide. I would never want someone I cared about, someone I loved to go through it.” He wrapped his arms around her thigh, kissed her leg, and stared up at her. “Growing up with us is all they know. They have our love, our coven, and we teach them how to be vampires.”
“No one ever wonders about where they come from? Is it possible for a half-blood to grow up without vampires and not know they are part vampire? You can’t possibly track all the children,” Sarma whispered, staring at the ceiling.
“We do, so the children never meet a horrible end. I never heard of a half-blood living without us. It doesn’t happen. We explain everything to them. Raised by full bloods, they accept it. We’re tight in our community, Sarma. Few reject it. Most of them love their abilities and know full blood humans hate them. Their mothers never know they gave birth to half-bloods. What would happen to those children if they went to find their mother, and she rejected them? They understand how unlikely acceptance would be.” He peered up at her from between her legs, dreaming about tasting her again.
“Were those children at the summer celebration half-bloods? How many children do you have?” Sarma met his eyes.
He read the insecurity in them. “Yes, they were. I don’t know. I never counted. Many. It’s been my duty for years. I don’t raise them. They never find out I’m their . . . I don’t want to say, father, because I’m not their father. I’m like a sperm donor. End of story. I never know for sure which children are mine.” He pulled himself further up her body.
Sarma twined his hair between her fingers. “I don’t know if I could ever get used to this. Our child would have a bunch of half-siblings, and never know? I mean, the whole thing is beyond bizarre.”
He sighed. Not a surprise. But he doubted Sarma would ever understand, let alone agree to another ceremony. All of her worries were valid and important to him, but they made it clearer than ever why his kind maintained non-love relationships with humans.
“I want Auseklis’ mother to be with him. If you could raise him, would you want to be his mother?” He held up his hand indicating her not to answer. “Wait, before you answer, Sarma, there’s something I want to make very clear to you. Even if you say no, even if you don’t want to be Auseklis’ mother, I still want to be with you for eternity. I will fight for you, regardless of your choice. I need you to know that.” His gaze drilled her, hard and aware; he meant every word. “If we mated for life, I would never have to complete duty again.” He took her hand in his.
Overwhelmed with a mixture of admiration and insecurity, she closed her eyes and leaned back against the pillow.
“Just kiss me.”
Chapter 36
After pulling on a jacket over pajamas, Sarma trudged over to the cabin where Marita stayed. Though it was mid-day, the surrounding Redwood trees held a chill in the air. She made her way down the dirt trail. His way of life still didn’t make sense to her, but every couple had differences between them. What she adored about him eclipsed those differences, and she was getting used to them.
Each time doubt slinked into her mind, Reinis’ pure self-confidence strengthened her convictions. Sarma exhaled sharply, the mist of her breath puffing in the air. A shadow in her heart brightened. He loved her no matter what choice she made about Auseklis. The imprint doubled in size and vibration in her chest.
Arriving at Marita’s cabin, Sarma slowly opened the door and peeked in. She slept soundly, still recuperating from the last few months. Sarma closed the door and returned to Reinis. Back in the room, she slipped off her clothes, climbed into bed, and snuggled with him. He pulled himself on top of her and settled his head on her shoulder.
“What happened to your father? How did he die?” Reinis moved to the side.
“My mother says he committed suicide when I was four. I don’t remember much about him.” Sarma strained her mind trying to gain access to memories of her father. “The strange thing is, I don’t remember a funeral, and when I was old enough to ask, my mother got angry at my questions and never answered them. I have no one else to ask either.”
“You were only four. Maybe you don’t remember because of your age. Humans are lucky. Your memory is not as clear as ours.”
“I do remember a lot from that age. I was in preschool. I finger painted with a woman neighbor named Margie who would visit my mother. Besides her, my mother had no friends, never invited anyone home, and never went out until I moved away. Reinis, my father was there one day, gone the next.”
“She never talked about how he committed suicide or why?” He searched her eyes.
Sadness reflected in them. “Not a word. I have a few memories, though. He was tall, handsome, with piercing blue eyes, and dark brown hair. He had a sense of humor
and would play with me while he talked with my mom. They spoke Latvian. I spoke Latvian but forgot the words later because my mother never spoke the language again. She never took me around other Latvians, cut herself off from the rest of her family, and her sister, Marita’s mother whom I barely know.
I don’t remember him as depressed or angry. Why would he suddenly kill himself? My mother was always the moody one, even before his disappearance. It never made sense to me.” She flopped over on her side examining the ceiling as if the answers to her questions might be woven in the wood beams. “Besides, my mother always warned me never to visit Latvia. She had a fit when I told her I was going. But, like the questions about my father, she wouldn’t tell me why. Just said it was bad luck.”
Reinis stroked her hair. “You do have clear memories. Sharp enough to remember a funeral.”
“What about your father? What happened to him?” She turned back toward him.
He became still, closed his eyes, and drummed his fingers on his chest. “I never speak about this. Not with my family, not with anyone at all.”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”
“Don’t apologize. It’s only fair. I asked, and you answered. My family still hurts this many years later. And there’s no one to talk with about it. I never discuss private matters with anyone.”
“I understand.” She squeezed his hand.
“Humans murdered my father after they found out he was a vampire. They shot him and cut off his head. Because of our ability to heal, there are very few ways we can die. Hitting us at the perfect angle in the heart or cutting off our heads is pretty much it. The strange thing is, many humans don’t know this, especially since most people don’t believe in us anymore. But they did both to him. He was almost invincible and would have survived if they hadn’t removed his head.” Reinis tucked his lips into his mouth and squeezed them.
Through the imprint, Sarma sensed his chest stiffen with sorrow. “Why would you want to be with me then? I’m human.”
Forbidden Darkness (Immortal Desire Series Book 1) Page 20