Promise of a Family

by Jo Ann Brown

  “They never seem to bring anything but sadness. I know I should forgive Franklin and Norah. That is what the Bible teaches, but I have failed because... I don’t know how.”

  “Weren’t you supposed to be married shortly after your mother died?”

  “Yes.” She kicked a piece of broken shell into the water. “But the tragedies my family suffered does not excuse me for not being able to forgive them. It has been five years. Since then, Franklin and Norah have had two children, and I understand they are expecting another.”

  “Understand? You have not seen them?”

  “No.” Tears washed into her eyes. “I received a couple of letters from Norah, but she only said that she was sorry if I was hurt. If? Then she went on to say that she was sure I understood. I had no idea what she meant, and I was not ready to beg for an answer.”

  “I cannot imagine you begging for anything.”

  She shook her head. “Do not make me sound proud, Drake. That is not a good way to live one’s life.”

  “You are far from proud, though you have every reason to be. We all make mistakes, Susanna, but you also make a difference. Not just to your family and the people of Porthlowen. You are ready to help anyone who needs help. I know how you went through Cothaire’s attic and selected items not only to give to Raymond’s parishioners, but also to send to the families in the mining village we visited.”

  “How did you know that?”

  “Shall I say that a little Bertie told me?”

  She brushed away the single tear falling down her cheek. “I should have guessed. Everything in life is exciting and new for him, and he wants to share everything with everyone.”

  “Susanna,” Drake said, abruptly somber again, “I have to ask a question. Is it Franklin Chenowith and his wife whom you cannot forgive? Or is it that you cannot forgive yourself, because you feel you should have had the situation under control so you were not surprised?”

  She stared at him for a long minute, then slid her arms around his waist. As his arm came up to enfold her again, she whispered, “I don’t know. Drake, I honestly don’t know.”

  He pressed his lips to the top of her bonnet. Then he pulled her even closer. He kissed her cheek with a tenderness that made her heart pound before he trailed kisses along her jaw. Her breath rasped in her ears before his lips found hers. As he explored them gently, she could no longer deny this was what she had been waiting for. He was what she had been waiting for.

  He raised his head to say, “You have no idea how long I have been waiting to kiss you.”

  “Probably as long as I have been waiting for you to kiss me.” She stroked his cheek, thrilling in its roughness from storms upon the sea.

  “Then it seems silly to wait any longer for another.”

  “I agree.” She slid her arms up to curve around his back as he kissed her again, more deeply and more intensely.

  She returned the kiss, hoping he could understand what words would never be able to say. She had rediscovered happiness with him and did not want that happiness to end.

  Chapter Fifteen

  The sun shining through the tall windows struck Susanna’s closed eyes, waking her from a dream that dissolved instantly. All she could recall was that Drake had been in it. She smiled into her pillow, longing to grasp what had faded away; then she realized her happiness was real. Since Drake had kissed her on the beach, everything seemed more splendid.

  Too bad they had not had time alone since. He had come to Cothaire one evening to dine with the whole family, and she had admired how he could argue with her father when their opinions differed, but always offered her father the respect he was due as an earl. Raymond and Caroline welcomed him wholeheartedly, but Arthur was a bit more tentative. Her older brother always felt it was his position, as heir, to be cautious. Even so, by evening’s end, he had become slightly more relaxed with Drake. She assured Drake that, for Arthur, it was equal to a hearty embrace.

  She treasured every moment with Drake. A single glance from him left her smiling for hours. The brush of his fingers made her dizzy with delight. Seeing Drake playing with the children, who adored him, touched her heart in ways she could not have imagined.

  Was that how Raymond and Elisabeth felt? Today they would become man and wife. If she looked in a glass, would she see that same glow of love around her? Her joy became almost too sweet to bear. So much happiness in a house that had been dreary for so long. She never had guessed that the love between a man and a woman was a lamp that lit people from the inside out, just as God’s love did.

  When the sun pierced her eyelids again, Susanna turned away and opened her eyes. She looked over her shoulder. The bed curtains had been pulled aside, allowing the morning light to wash over her bed.

  Having that happen was no longer a surprise, though the children had not sneaked into her room since they moved into the night nursery. Susanna sat, taking care not to jostle the bed. The twins and Bertie were curled up together in innocent sleep. No doubt, Miss Oliver was frantic trying to find them without disturbing the family.

  Reaching for her dressing gown, Susanna slipped out of bed and drew the bed curtains closed, leaving a finger’s space so the children would not be in the dark if they woke. She buttoned her dressing gown as she went to the door. With a glance back at the bed, she closed the door and crossed the sitting room.

  It did not take long to find Miss Oliver, who was peering into one open doorway after another. Hurrying to the nurse, Susanna said, “They are in my room.”

  “I had hoped that was so, but I did not want to disturb you, my lady, so I was checking elsewhere. Just in case.”

  “Rightly so. Those imps could have been anywhere, from the attic to Elisabeth’s shop in the village.”

  Miss Oliver dipped in another of her curtsies that were more elegant than any Susanna had ever achieved. “I will collect them now and remind them that they should wait until everyone is awake before they go exploring.”

  “They are asleep. Leave them be.”

  “But you need to ready yourself for the parson’s wedding. They are certain to interfere.”

  Susanna smiled, knowing she was being overindulgent. “I am sure they will not sleep much longer. They always wake in time for breakfast.”

  “That is true.” A rare smile warmed Miss Oliver’s face. “Send for me when they wake, and I will get them fed and ready for the service and the wedding.”

  “I will.”

  Susanna returned to her room and the whirlwind of last-minute preparations. The assembly would be crowded, and she and Caroline had worked with Mrs. Ford, Mrs. Hitchens and Baricoat to make sure no detail was overlooked. She was partway through the breakfast tray delivered to her room when the children woke. Sending them to the nursery, she gave herself to the ministrations of the head maid, who also served as her lady’s maid.

  When Caroline came to tell her that they were ready to leave, Susanna pulled on her gloves and bonnet. She tossed her favorite dark blue paisley shawl over her shoulders. It had belonged to their mother, and the fringe was gold silk. In this small way, she could make her mother part of the wedding.

  Papa was able to walk with a cane to the closed carriage with the family’s crest on the door. He and Arthur would ride in that to the church, while Susanna would follow with Caroline, Miss Oliver and the children. With the sun shining and only a wisp of a breeze off the sea, she was glad to ride in the open carriage.

  As soon as she stepped in, Lulu and Moll both scrambled to sit on her lap. Miss Oliver halted them, reminding them that no one wanted to arrive at the church with her dress mussed. When they acquiesced, nodding enthusiastically, Susanna was astonished. The nurse was an excellent influence on them.

  She leaned back against the black velvet cushions and gazed down at the harbor. The Kestrel’s bare masts were ta
ll and proud just like her captain. Clasping her hands together on her lap, she smiled as she thought of seeing Drake again.

  It was going to be a wonderful day.

  * * *

  “’Tis a wonderful day for a wedding,” Benton said as he took off his hat and followed Drake into the church.

  “Made to order.” Drake looked for a place to sit.

  Most of the pews were filled to overflowing. The front two were almost vacant. An elderly couple sat on one side. The bride’s parents? Grandparents? He would ask Susanna later.

  Just the thought of her name sent anticipation pulsing through him. He could not believe so many days had passed without him having a chance to kiss her again. If he had not tasted her lips once, his annoyance at how events had contrived to keep them apart might not be so strong. Yet, having sampled them once, he yearned for them even more.

  Perhaps tonight when others are dancing. He almost chuckled. Drake Nesbitt attending an assembly at an earl’s great house. No one would believe that in Plymouth. He had hardly believed it himself, even though a footman from Cothaire had delivered an elegant black evening coat and black waistcoat to The Kestrel. Hanging with them in his quarters were his freshly laundered white shirt and cravat. The footman had also brought what Drake guessed were the proper shoes. He had worn nothing but boots for years, and he found the low shoes with their thick heels amusing. He might be able to walk in them, but dancing was certain to be impossible.

  Unless he danced with Susanna. It would not matter what he wore then, because his feet would have wings. Just as his heart did. It had been held to the earth for too long by the spike Ruby’s betrayal had driven into him. But his bitterness was gone. It had been pushed aside by Susanna’s sweetness and gentle but strong faith. She had healed his heart, and her acceptance of God in her life as wise counselor was helping him repair his own connection with Him.

  A parishioner walking past jostled Drake out of his reverie. He saw space left in a pew about halfway to the front. Elbowing his first mate, who was eyeing a pretty lass, he walked to it. He was surprised to see there was room for him and Benton and perhaps one other.

  Sitting, he looked around the church. He was astonished how comfortable he had come to feel in the small stone building. Not just worshipping with others, but the feeling of community as he watched people greet their neighbors. Many offered him a cheerful “Good morning.” Until he came to the parish church, he had not realized there was a family to be found within it, as well.

  The irrepressible Winwood sisters gave him a wave, and he nodded in their direction. Mrs. Thorburn, who seldom looked happy even in church, was wearing less of a frown than usual. More people were entering the church and gathering at the back, some sitting on chairs they must have brought themselves. Others stood. He thought about motioning to them that there was room in the pew where he sat with Benton and a fisherman he recognized and the man’s wife.

  Then the earl and his family arrived. While they went to take their seats in the front pews, warm greetings met them.

  The voices faded when Drake’s gaze settled on Susanna. She wore a simple pink gown, the exact shade of her cheeks. If she had been carrying a bouquet of fresh flowers instead of Moll, she could have been a bride walking down the aisle. The sunlight glistened in her hair, burnishing it with auburn fire, and her smile was as bright.

  Her eyes searched the congregation, and they crinkled in a smile when she found him. Moll waved wildly in his direction. He returned it as Susanna carried her past their row, then paused when it became clear there was not enough room for the whole family, including the bride and groom and the children, in the front pews.

  “There is space here,” Drake said, standing and stepping out of the pew, giving Benton a half shove toward the fisherman and his wife. “You are welcome to take our seats.”

  “I believe there is room enough for all of us if you gentlemen can spare a lap.”

  “Anytime. You need only ask.”

  When Susanna blushed prettily, Drake was sure she thought, as he did, of her perched on his knees, her arms around his neck and her lips meeting his.

  He lowered his voice and repeated, “Anytime, Susanna.”

  Hearing a sniff behind him, he nodded toward Mrs. Thorburn, who wore a vexed expression. He could not guess if she was upset at him, Susanna or the children. Probably all three.

  “Good morning, Mrs. Thorburn,” he said with a smile.

  “Yes, yes.” She looked away, then turned to speak to the people in the pew behind her.

  Benton scooped up Bertie and put the little boy on his lap. Bertie crowed with excitement when the first mate slid farther along to leave room for Drake and Susanna.

  “My lady,” Drake said as he motioned for her to go ahead of him. When Susanna did, holding Moll close, he bent and held out his hands to Lulu.

  “Cap!” she yelled, throwing herself at him.

  “That is my girl.” He ignored Mrs. Thorburn’s frown along with the chuckles from the Winwood sisters across the aisle as he sat beside Susanna.

  Lulu opened her mouth to say something more, but Susanna put her finger to the child’s lips.

  Drake was surprised that she would halt the little girl, who was too quiet, from speaking. He was about to say so, but, her eyes twinkling with amusement, Susanna moved her finger from Lulu’s lips to his.

  Even though he had been dreaming of her touch all week, he was unprepared for the sweet sensation of her teasing touch. He could not look away. The amusement in her eyes metamorphosed into wonder. Her lips parted in an unspoken invitation to kiss her right there and then. Each fiber within him urged him to accept, but he drew back, unable to forget that they sat in her family’s church, waiting for her brother’s banns to be read for the third time and for Raymond and Miss Rowse to take their vows.

  Envy surged through him, as powerful as the yearning was. Envy that today was the wedding day for Raymond Trelawney and Elisabeth Rowse rather than Susanna Trelawney and Drake Nesbitt.

  Was he insane? He had made the mistake of falling in love once before, and what had it gained him? Heartache and disillusionment and the determination not to be stupid again. He should count his blessings that he had not spoken vows with faithless Ruby.

  Parson Lambrick had returned to read the banns for the third time, and he oversaw the whole service. His lesson was dry and without little hints of humor as Raymond’s had been, but as Drake bounced Lulu on his knee gently, he heard the wisdom in the words.

  Then Parson Lambrick called Raymond and Elisabeth to come to stand with him by the altar rail. He held a simple brown leather book.

  Susanna leaned toward Drake and whispered, “It is so strange to see my brother with his back to the congregation.”

  “I suspect it is odd for him, too.”

  “He loves Elisabeth and cannot wait for her to be his wife.”

  Drake smiled. “I don’t doubt that, but look at his hands. If he clenches them any more tightly, he is going to drive his fingers right through his palms.”

  Susanna put her fingers over her mouth and coughed, but he was not fooled. She was trying to conceal her laughter.

  He was not the only one grinning broadly when Raymond gave Elisabeth a kiss to seal their vows. Cheers broke out through the church when the couple turned and, the bride’s hand on the groom’s arm, began to walk up the aisle.

  Elisabeth’s smile made her plain face glorious. She paused by the front pew to give Toby a kiss and offer her hand. He grabbed it and marched beside the newlyweds. He grinned at her with the same adoring, loving expression as Raymond wore. Anyone watching would guess that Raymond, Elisabeth and Toby were a family. In all the important ways, they were.

  That realization gave him pause. The children had been in Porthlowen for almost two months. No one had come forward to ask about the
m. All their efforts to discover where they had come from and who had put them in the rickety boat had come to naught.

  His thoughts continued in that direction as he carried Lulu out of the church. He paused once he was outside and turned to wait for Susanna, Benton and the other children. When his first mate put Bertie down and made his exit at top speed, Susanna took the little boy’s hand and steered both him and Moll to where Drake waited.

  Instead of Susanna talking about the wedding ceremony, the first thing she said was “Drake, I have been thinking. Maybe we should stop looking for the children’s parents.”

  “You have?” He set Lulu down beside her twin.

  As the children chattered to each other, Susanna said, “Look at my brother and his family. They are a family. How can we tear them apart?”

  He glanced toward where Raymond and Elisabeth were accepting congratulations. Each held one of Toby’s hands, and the little boy wore a smile as big as the bride’s and groom’s.

  “Is halting the search what you truly want?” Drake asked.

  * * *

  Susanna hesitated. How easy it would be to say yes!

  A small hand tugged on her dress, and Moll asked, “Go see Toby? Play with Toby?”

  “Yes, but go no farther than where Toby is now.” She crouched down and looked directly into the twin’s eyes before glancing at the boys with the same serious expression. “If you go farther, you will have to come back and stand here with Cap and me.”

  They ran off.

  Drake asked, “Do you think they will listen to you? They are young.”

  “They won’t, but Miss Oliver will keep a close watch on them.” As the two little girls paused to talk to the Winwood sisters and other people they knew, she sighed. “Look at that, Drake. The children have become a part of our community. These six small children have brought so much happiness to Porthlowen and to Cothaire. Only Arthur, who is always so serious about everything, seems immune to their charm.”

  “And my crew has made them more toys out of bits of wood than any score of children would need.”