The Marciano Love-Child

by MELANIE MILBURNE

  ‘Scarlett…’ He pushed a hand through the black silk of his hair and met her gaze. ‘I would like to discuss the role I want to play in Matthew’s life now that I know he is mine.’

  Here it comes, she thought, her stomach twisting and turning with dread. ‘He’s only three years old,’ she said, sending him a flinty look. ‘I hope you’re not expecting him to fly back and forth like a parcel between Sydney and Milan several times a year? Because I won’t allow it.’

  A frown drew his brows together. ‘I was not thinking of any such thing, not yet in any case. He is too young to be without his mother for one thing, and the other…’

  Scarlett waited for him to continue, but instead he let out a sigh and got to his feet. She watched, her breath feeling as if she was drawing it into her lungs through a crushed drinking-straw, as he reached down and picked up the hospital photograph again. He stood looking down at it for endless seconds. His face side-on was like an expressionless mask, and yet she was almost certain she could see a film of moisture in his eyes as he put the frame back down and faced her fully.

  ‘Tell me about him,’ he said in a voice that didn’t sound like his at all. ‘Tell me everything.’

  Scarlett wasn’t sure where to begin. She didn’t want to overload him with guilt, but neither did she want him to think it had been a breeze having his child without emotional and financial support. ‘He’s a lovely child,’ she said. ‘He was born at eleven in the morning and weighed seven pounds and three ounces. He’s very advanced for his age; he walked at ten months, and spoke in full sentences at eighteen, which is unusual for boys; they are often slower with language. He loves cars, as you can see, and he loves animals. I wish I could have given him more than I have, but…Well, I gave him what I could when I could.’

  ‘You did your best,’ he said. ‘I am amazed that you have achieved what you have while trying to raise a small child.’

  ‘It wasn’t always easy,’ she admitted. ‘But my mother has been down this road before, so I more or less knew what I was in for.’

  Scarlett looked at his tortured expression. Seeing him finally accept Matthew as his son had been so incredibly poignant, it had moved her to tears. It would take him a few days, maybe even weeks, to realise the full extent of what he had missed out on in his son’s life so far. He was so obviously affected by the realisation that he had made the biggest mistake of his life. He was doing his best to find a way to make amends, but how that was going to impact on her and Matthew remained to be seen.

  ‘I want an active role in his life,’ Alessandro said. ‘I know it will be hard for you to accept, but I want to be a real father to him now.’

  She didn’t answer, just stood there before him with uncertainty and fear in her gaze. And no wonder, Alessandro thought. He still found it hard to believe just a thin wall of plasterboard separated him from the sleeping form of his son. The son he had betrayed by being so adamant Scarlett had lied to him.

  Three years of Matthew’s life had gone past, each and every day containing a thousand memories that he would never have access to. It was gone for ever; the babyhood of the only child he would ever have was gone.

  His eyes went to the photograph again. It was like a magnet. Every time he tried to avert his gaze, it tracked back to that small rectangle of truth as if pulled by powerful strings.

  He should have been standing there beside her with a smile as wide as any proud father’s. Instead he had been several-thousand kilometres away, seething with hatred.

  But now he was here, and he had to do something about preparing Scarlett for the burden of knowledge that had deadened his soul for so long. She would surely be devastated to find out Matthew could have a life-threatening condition. What parent wouldn’t be?

  He let another silence pass for a moment or two.

  ‘I was thinking we could get married as soon as possible,’ he finally said.

  Her eyes bulged with shock, or was it anger? He couldn’t quite tell. ‘Excuse me?’ she said, her mouth so tight it looked like it had been stitched into place. ‘What did you say?’

  He cleared his throat. ‘I said I thought we could get married.’

  ‘For what reason?’

  He didn’t like the sound of her tone, or the contentious look she was firing his way, but he soldiered on regardless. ‘We have a son,’ he said. ‘He has a mother, but he has not had a father for the first three years of his life. I am prepared to step into that role and do what I can to make it up to him.’

  ‘You can never make it up to him,’ she said, her eyes flashing with venom as they hit his. ‘You have your evidence now, but where were you when he and I really needed you? How dare you think you can waltz back into our lives on the basis of a pathology test and suddenly become father of the year?’

  ‘I have some rights, surely?’ he argued, even though he understood her position. ‘I know I did not plan for this to happen, but it has, and I am prepared to face the consequences.’

  She threw him a blistering look. ‘I don’t want to marry you. You’re only asking me because of Matthew. How do you think that makes me feel?’

  ‘Your feelings or even mine do not come into it,’ he said. ‘I am trying to do what is best for our child.’

  ‘You seem to have forgotten something,’ she said with a glittering glare. ‘I hate you for what you did to me, Alessandro.’

  ‘I hope to God you have not communicated that to my son,’ he inserted into the taut silence.

  Scarlett wasn’t entirely sure what she had been expecting him to say in response, but it certainly hadn’t been that. He seemed to be genuinely concerned about Matthew. It made her feel ashamed that she hadn’t factored in her little boy’s feelings and needs in this most complicated of situations.

  ‘No…’ she said on an expelled breath. ‘Of course not.’

  ‘But you told him I was dead.’

  Her head came up, her eyes reluctantly meeting his. ‘Yes. I thought it was the best thing all round. My mother was deserted by my father before I was born. She struggled so hard to provide for my sister and me. I knew I couldn’t come home and announce I was pregnant to a man who refused to acknowledge my baby’s existence. I was so distraught, I found myself telling Mum and Sophie the father had been killed in a road accident. It seemed believable.’

  ‘Did you tell anyone the truth?’

  She shook her head and looked down at her hands. ‘Not until the other day when you came into the studio. Before that I was tempted to many times, to Roxanne mostly, but I didn’t see the point. You had denied all responsibility. I didn’t see that changing any time soon.’

  He sent a hand on a rough pathway through his hair again, making it stick up at odd angles. ‘If only you had sent me a photo or two,’ he said heavily. ‘I would have had no choice but to sit up and take notice.’

  She lifted her gaze back to his. ‘So now it’s my fault for not pressing the issue a bit harder, is it?’

  Alessandro jerked back as if she had struck him. ‘No, I am not saying that. I just wish…’ He didn’t finish the sentence. He couldn’t think of the words to say. He wished he could rewrite the past. He wished he could have told Scarlett four years ago of his love for her, but the burden that was attached to that love had prevented him. He wished he could tell her now of how worried he was that her world, her relatively secure world, could come crashing down at any moment.

  And it was his fault.

  Scarlett swung away in despair. ‘I can’t believe you have the audacity to come here and expect me to fall into your plans as if the last four years haven’t happened.’

  ‘I understand your reluctance, but I am thinking about our son. He deserves better than this.’

  She spun back to glare at him. ‘What do you mean, “he deserves better than this”? Are you somehow suggesting I’m not doing a proper job of raising him?’

  He gave the room a sweeping glance before returning his gaze to her combative one. ‘This is a small flat.
It is up three flights of stairs, and as far as I can tell has no air-conditioning. It is not the place for a young child.’

  ‘The air-conditioning broke down a couple of weeks ago,’ she said. ‘The landlord hasn’t got around to fixing it yet. And, besides, I can’t afford to rent a house with a garden as much as I’d like to. I have bills enough as it is, trying to run a business.’

  ‘I will take care of all of your expenses, Scarlett,’ he said. ‘I will pay off any of your loans and credit cards. I will also arrange for Matthew’s name to be put down at the school you would like him to attend when he is of age.’

  She gave him a narrowed-eyed look, her tone deliberately sarcastic. ‘Forgive me if I’m wrong, but I can sense a list of conditions attached to that very generous offer?’

  His eyes glinted with determination. ‘Just the one, actually,’ he said. ‘Marriage to me.’

  ‘No.’ She clamped her lips tight over the word.

  ‘Do not make me resort to more forceful means, Scarlett,’ he said, with rising frustration. ‘I am trying my best to be patient and understanding with you. We once had a good relationship. We could work towards having one again for Matthew’s sake.’

  Scarlett threw him a scornful look. ‘You think by just walking in here and offering marriage everything is going to magically turn out right? What planet have you been living on? We hate each other, Alessandro. I don’t see that changing just by shoving a wedding band on our hands and smiling for the cameras.’

  ‘I realise you have every reason to hate me,’ he said. ‘But for Matthew’s sake I must ask you to please try and control those feelings. I do not want him to grow up in a hostile environment.’

  ‘I’m not marrying you.’

  ‘You are only saying that because you want to punish me.’

  She rolled her eyes at him. ‘No, I’m saying it because it’s actually true. I apologise if your ego finds it a little hard to accept—but, thanks but no thanks, as the saying goes.’

  He stepped towards her and took her by the upper arms in a hold that was on the surface gentle, but Scarlett could feel the steely strength of his fingers the moment she tried to pull away.

  ‘Listen to me, Scarlett,’ he ground out, his eyes locking on hers. ‘You will marry me or I will close your business down. You will be begging on the streets for your next meal, I guarantee it.’

  Her eyes flashed with hatred. ‘If you ruin me you’ll be ruining your own son. What sort of man are you?’

  ‘I have the sort of legal connections that will ensure I gain full custody of Matthew,’ he said, his voice hard and determined. ‘You will see him only if and when I say you can.’

  Scarlett felt the cold, hard stone of despair land in her stomach, the weight of it threatening to send her insides to the floor at her feet.

  She had underestimated him.

  He had the sort of money to do anything he wanted. If he took it upon himself to ruin her, he could do it. If he wanted full custody of Matthew, he would and could get it. The only way she could stop him would be to do what he wanted her to do.

  But marrying a man she had once loved with all her heart, only to have been rejected so cruelly and unfairly, was more than she could bear. Her anger towards him had festered for close to four years. It was like a hard nut deep inside her that wouldn’t dissolve. If she allowed herself to be coerced into a loveless marriage, what damage would it do to her? Not to mention Matthew, who would surely sense the enmity between his parents. He was a deeply sensitive and highly intelligent child; it would gradually erode his self-esteem to find his parents were only together for the sake of appearances.

  She slowly dragged her tortured gaze back to his. ‘Don’t make me do this, Alessandro. Do you really want me to hate you more than I already do?’

  His eyes were more brown than green as they held hers. ‘It is a strange sort of hate, don’t you think? Your eyes burn with it, and yet your body burns with something else.’

  Scarlett became increasingly aware of the heat of his body against hers and the warmth of his breath as it caressed her face. She nervously moistened her lips, tasting wine and temptation as his mouth slowly but inexorably lowered towards hers.

  The first touch of his lips against hers was like an explosion of flammable materials. The blood thrummed in her ears as she felt the sensual glide of his tongue against the seam of her mouth, not asking but demanding entry.

  She gave it without hesitation, her lips opening on a deep sigh of pleasure as his tongue invaded her mouth, sweeping and stroking and thrusting against hers with earth-shattering expertise. She felt as if she was on fire. Her whole body was leaping to life; her breasts became heavy and tingly, her legs loosened, her spine melted, and her arms moved to his chest, her fingers splayed at first, then clutching at him as his kiss became even more intensely sexual.

  He nipped at her bottom lip in a teasing manner and she responded by doing the same, but a little harder. He groaned deep at the back of his throat and nipped again, his tongue sweeping over the indentation of where his teeth had been. She bit him again, but softer this time, sucking on him, tugging on him until he took control again, his tongue playing with hers in a teasing come-and-get-me manner.

  Scarlett knew she had to put a stop to this before she melted into a pool at his feet. She could already feel the dew of desire between her legs, the throbbing pulse building to fever pitch until she could barely stand.

  She pulled out of his embrace—obviously catching him off-guard, for otherwise she knew he would not have released her until he was ready to do so.

  She stood, desperately trying to get her breathing back under control, her lips tingling as if a thousand electrodes were attached while her heart thudded haphazardly. ‘You sh-shouldn’t have done that,’ she said, annoyed that her voice sounded so breathless and uneven.

  His eyes still burned with desire as they held hers. ‘Why not?’ he asked.

  She glared at him. ‘You know why.’

  ‘As of three days ago we were already involved, so I do not see the problem.’

  ‘I was only involved with you as I had no choice. You practically blackmailed me into your bed.’

  ‘It did not take too much pressure to get you there,’ he said. ‘It makes me wonder just how many other men have been in your life since we broke up.’

  Scarlett felt like slapping him, but then she realised she was just as angry at herself. As he had pointed out, she hadn’t really put up much resistance, which didn’t give her much moral high-ground to stand on. ‘I know you’ll find this hard to believe, but there’s been no one since you,’ she said.

  ‘What about Kirby?’

  ‘I have never been involved with Dylan,’ she said. ‘He’s always been like a brother to me.’

  His brow was creased in a frown. ‘So there has been no one?’

  ‘No. Being a single mother makes dating difficult. You have to be so careful these days with whom you allow your child to have contact. I decided it was too much effort.’ She sent him brittle glance and added, ‘It’s probably hard for a man like you to understand, but I never once considered getting rid of him.’

  Alessandro met her flashing eyes and inwardly sighed. One of the reasons he’d had a vasectomy was to prevent any lover of his having to face such an agonising decision.

  ‘Was it a difficult pregnancy?’ he asked after a little pause.

  She took her time answering, her bottom lip suffering a little nibble by her teeth before she released it in order to speak. ‘It was hard being alone. I wanted to share the whole experience with…with someone, but that wasn’t possible.’

  ‘If only I had known back then what I know now,’ he mused.

  Her expression instantly hardened. ‘You no doubt would have insisted I have a termination, wouldn’t you? The last thing you wanted to be was tied down with a wife and a child. You’ve said it several times since. You lived the life of a playboy when I met you, and still do; I always suspected I was not
hing more than a temporary diversion, for if I had been anything else you would never have doubted me.’

  ‘I cannot change the past any more than you can, Scarlett,’ he said. ‘We have a son who needs both his parents. Marriage is our only option. I will not settle for anything less.’

  Scarlett didn’t bother hiding her contempt. ‘You weren’t so keen on marriage and babies a few days ago.’

  His hazel eyes darkened as they clashed with hers. ‘There will be no other babies. I want you to be clear on that right from the start.’

  There was a taut silence.

  ‘What if I am already pregnant?’ she asked.

  A tiny jackhammer seemed to be at work beneath his skin at the side of his mouth, which was pulled tight. ‘Are you saying you are not on the Pill?’

  ‘Why would I be?’ she asked. ‘As I told you—I haven’t slept with anyone since you.’

  He swung away from her, his expression clouding with something she couldn’t quite identify. She watched as he paced the room back and forth, his long strides having to shorten considerably to fit between the sofa and the shabby wall-unit.

  When he finally turned back to look at her his face was ashen. ‘If it has happened…’ he swallowed deeply ‘…then we will deal with it. How soon will you know?’

  She chewed at the inside of her mouth, trying to recall where she was in her cycle. ‘I’m due in a few days,’ she said, not able to meet his eyes.

  ‘I have organised to have the procedure redone,’ he said. ‘I’m going to hospital as a day case.’

  Scarlett felt as if she had been struck by something heavy and blunt deep and low in her abdomen. ‘You’re asking too much, Alessandro,’ she said, lifting her gaze back to his. ‘I want another child. I don’t want Matthew to grow up without a brother or sister.’

  His jaw was set in intractable lines. ‘Well, I do not want another child. I did not want the one I have, but there is nothing I can do about it now.’

  She glared at him in outrage. ‘How can you say that? Matthew is a living, breathing child. He’s the most precious little person. He’s your flesh and blood, for God’s sake. He’s already halfway to loving you.’