Phineas Redux

by Anthony Trollope

  CHAPTER XXII.

  "PURITY OF MORALS, FINN."

  Mr. Quintus Slide was now, as formerly, the editor of the People'sBanner, but a change had come over the spirit of his dream. Hisnewspaper was still the People's Banner, and Mr. Slide stillprofessed to protect the existing rights of the people, and to demandnew rights for the people. But he did so as a Conservative. He hadwatched the progress of things, and had perceived that duty calledupon him to be the organ of Mr. Daubeny. This duty he performed withgreat zeal, and with an assumption of consistency and infallibilitywhich was charming. No doubt the somewhat difficult task of veeringround without inconsistency, and without flaw to his infallibility,was eased by Mr. Daubeny's newly-declared views on Church matters.The People's Banner could still be a genuine People's Banner inreference to ecclesiastical policy. And as that was now the subjectmainly discussed by the newspapers, the change made was almostentirely confined to the lauding of Mr. Daubeny instead of Mr.Turnbull. Some other slight touches were no doubt necessary. Mr.Daubeny was the head of the Conservative party in the kingdom, andthough Mr. Slide himself might be of all men in the kingdom the mostdemocratic, or even the most destructive, still it was essential thatMr. Daubeny's organ should support the Conservative party all round.It became Mr. Slide's duty to speak of men as heaven-born patriotswhom he had designated a month or two since as bloated aristocratsand leeches fattened on the blood of the people. Of course remarkswere made by his brethren of the press,--remarks which were intendedto be very unpleasant. One evening newspaper took the trouble todivide a column of its own into double columns, printing on oneside of the inserted line remarks made by the People's Banner inSeptember respecting the Duke of ----, and the Marquis of ----, andSir ---- ----, which were certainly very harsh; and on the other sideremarks equally laudatory as to the characters of the same titledpoliticians. But a journalist, with the tact and experience of Mr.Quintus Slide, knew his business too well to allow himself to beharassed by any such small stratagem as that. He did not pause todefend himself, but boldly attacked the meanness, the duplicity,the immorality, the grammar, the paper, the type, and the wife ofthe editor of the evening newspaper. In the storm of wind in whichhe rowed it was unnecessary for him to defend his own conduct."And then," said he at the close of a very virulent and successfularticle, "the hirelings of ---- dare to accuse me of inconsistency!"The readers of the People's Banner all thought that their editorhad beaten his adversary out of the field.

  Mr. Quintus Slide was certainly well adapted for his work. He couldedit his paper with a clear appreciation of the kind of matter whichwould best conduce to its success, and he could write telling leadingarticles himself. He was indefatigable, unscrupulous, and devotedto his paper. Perhaps his great value was shown most clearly in hisdistinct appreciation of the low line of public virtue with whichhis readers would be satisfied. A highly-wrought moral strain wouldhe knew well create either disgust or ridicule. "If there is anybeastliness I 'ate it is 'igh-faluting," he has been heard to say tohis underlings. The sentiment was the same as that conveyed in the"Point de zele" of Talleyrand. "Let's 'ave no d----d nonsense," hesaid on another occasion, when striking out from a leading articlea passage in praise of the patriotism of a certain public man. "Mr.Gresham is as good as another man, no doubt; what we want to know iswhether he's along with us." Mr. Gresham was not along with Mr. Slideat present, and Mr. Slide found it very easy to speak ill of Mr.Gresham.

  Mr. Slide one Sunday morning called at the house of Mr. Bunce inGreat Marlborough Street, and asked for Phineas Finn. Mr. Slide andMr. Bunce had an old acquaintance with each other, and the editor wasnot ashamed to exchange a few friendly words with the law-scrivenerbefore he was shown up to the member of Parliament. Mr. Bunce was anoutspoken, eager, and honest politician,--with very little accurateknowledge of the political conditions by which he was surrounded,but with a strong belief in the merits of his own class. He was asober, hardworking man, and he hated all men who were not sober andhardworking. He was quite clear in his mind that all nobility shouldbe put down, and that all property in land should be taken awayfrom men who were enabled by such property to live in idleness.What should be done with the land when so taken away was a questionwhich he had not yet learnt to answer. At the present moment hewas accustomed to say very hard words of Mr. Slide behind his back,because of the change which had been effected in the People'sBanner, and he certainly was not the man to shrink from assertingin a person's presence aught that he said in his absence. "Well, Mr.Conservative Slide," he said, stepping into the little back parlour,in which the editor was left while Mrs. Bunce went up to learnwhether the member of Parliament would receive his visitor.

  "None of your chaff, Bunce."

  "We have enough of your chaff, anyhow; don't we, Mr. Slide? I stillsees the Banner, Mr. Slide,--most days; just for the joke of it."

  "As long as you take it, Bunce, I don't care what the reason is."

  "I suppose a heditor's about the same as a Cabinet Minister. You'vegot to keep your place;--that's about it, Mr. Slide."

  "We've got to tell the people who's true to 'em. Do you believethat Gresham 'd ever have brought in a Bill for doing away with theChurch? Never;--not if he'd been Prime Minister till doomsday. Whatyou want is progress."

  "That's about it, Mr. Slide."

  "And where are you to get it? Did you ever hear that a rose by anyother name 'd smell as sweet? If you can get progress from theConservatives, and you want progress, why not go to the Conservativesfor it? Who repealed the corn laws? Who gave us 'ousehold suffrage?"

  "I think I've been told all that before, Mr. Slide; them thingsweren't given by no manner of means, as I look at it. We just went inand took 'em. It was hall a haccident whether it was Cobden or Peel,Gladstone or Disraeli, as was the servants we employed to do ourwork. But Liberal is Liberal, and Conservative is Conservative. Whatare you, Mr. Slide, to-day?"

  "If you'd talk of things, Bunce, which you understand, you would nottalk quite so much nonsense."

  At this moment Mrs. Bunce entered the room, perhaps preventing aquarrel, and offered to usher Mr. Slide up to the young member'sroom. Phineas had not at first been willing to receive the gentleman,remembering that when they had last met the intercourse had not beenpleasant,--but he knew that enmities are foolish things, and thatit did not become him to perpetuate a quarrel with such a man as Mr.Quintus Slide. "I remember him very well, Mrs. Bunce."

  "I know you didn't like him, Sir."

  "Not particularly."

  "No more don't I. No more don't Bunce. He's one of them as 'd saya'most anything for a plate of soup and a glass of wine. That's whatBunce says."

  "It won't hurt me to see him."

  "No, sir; it won't hurt you. It would be a pity indeed if the likesof him could hurt the likes of you." And so Mr. Quintus Slide wasshown up into the room.

  The first greeting was very affectionate, at any rate on the part ofthe editor. He grasped the young member's hand, congratulated himon his seat, and began his work as though he had never been all butkicked out of that very same room by its present occupant. "Now youwant to know what I'm come about; don't you?"

  "No doubt I shall hear in good time, Mr. Slide."

  "It's an important matter;--and so you'll say when you do hear. Andit's one in which I don't know whether you'll be able to see your wayquite clear."

  "I'll do my best, if it concerns me."

  "It does." So saying, Mr. Slide, who had seated himself in anarm-chair by the fireside opposite to Phineas, crossed his legs,folded his arms on his breast, put his head a little on one side,and sat for a few moments in silence, with his eyes fixed on hiscompanion's face. "It does concern you, or I shouldn't be here.Do you know Mr. Kennedy,--the Right Honourable Robert Kennedy, ofLoughlinter, in Scotland?"

  "I do know Mr. Kennedy."

  "And do you know Lady Laura Kennedy, his wife?"

  "Certainly I do."

  "So I supposed. And do you know the Earl of Brentford, who is, I takeit, father
to the lady in question?"

  "Of course I do. You know that I do." For there had been a time inwhich Phineas had been subjected to the severest censure which thePeople's Banner could inflict upon him, because of his adherenceto Lord Brentford, and the vials of wrath had been poured out by thehands of Mr. Quintus Slide himself.

  "Very well. It does not signify what I know or what I don't. Thosepreliminary questions I have been obliged to ask as my justificationfor coming to you on the present occasion. Mr. Kennedy has I believebeen greatly wronged."

  "I am not prepared to talk about Mr. Kennedy's affairs," said Phineasgravely.

  "But unfortunately he is prepared to talk about them. That's the rub.He has been ill-used, and he has come to the People's Banner forredress. Will you have the kindness to cast your eye down that slip?"Whereupon the editor handed to Phineas a long scrap of printed paper,amounting to about a column and a half of the People's Banner,containing a letter to the editor dated from Loughlinter, and signedRobert Kennedy at full length.

  "You don't mean to say that you're going to publish this," saidPhineas before he had read it.

  "Why not?"

  "The man is a madman."

  "There's nothing in the world easier than calling a man mad. It'swhat we do to dogs when we want to hang them. I believe Mr. Kennedyhas the management of his own property. He is not too mad for that.But just cast your eye down and read it."

  Phineas did cast his eye down, and read the whole letter;--nor ashe read it could he bring himself to believe that the writer of itwould be judged to be mad from its contents. Mr. Kennedy had toldthe whole story of his wrongs, and had told it well,--with piteoustruthfulness, as far as he himself knew and understood the truth. Theletter was almost simple in its wailing record of his own desolation.With a marvellous absence of reticence he had given the names of allpersons concerned. He spoke of his wife as having been, and being,under the influence of Mr. Phineas Finn;--spoke of his own formerfriendship for that gentleman, who had once saved his life whenhe fell among thieves, and then accused Phineas of treachery inbetraying that friendship. He spoke with bitter agony of the injurydone him by the Earl, his wife's father, in affording a home to hiswife, when her proper home was at Loughlinter. And then declaredhimself willing to take the sinning woman back to his bosom. "Thatshe had sinned is certain," he said; "I do not believe she has sinnedas some sin; but, whatever be her sin, it is for a man to forgive ashe hopes for forgiveness." He expatiated on the absolute and almostdivine right which it was intended that a husband should exerciseover his wife, and quoted both the Old and New Testament in proof ofhis assertions. And then he went on to say that he appealed to publicsympathy, through the public press, because, owing to some grossinsufficiency in the laws of extradition, he could not call upon themagistracy of a foreign country to restore to him his erring wife.But he thought that public opinion, if loudly expressed, would havean effect both upon her and upon her father, which his private wordscould not produce. "I wonder very greatly that you should put such aletter as that into type," said Phineas when he had read it all.

  "Why shouldn't we put it into type?"

  "You don't mean to say that you'll publish it."

  "Why shouldn't we publish it?"

  "It's a private quarrel between a man and his wife. What on earthhave the public got to do with that?"

  "Private quarrels between gentlemen and ladies have been publicaffairs for a long time past. You must know that very well."

  "When they come into court they are."

  "In court and out of court! The morale of our aristocracy,--whatyou call the Upper Ten,--would be at a low ebb indeed if the publicpress didn't act as their guardians. Do you think that if the Dukeof ---- beats his wife black and blue, nothing is to be said about itunless the Duchess brings her husband into court? Did you ever knowof a separation among the Upper Ten, that wasn't handled by thepress one way or the other? It's my belief that there isn't a peeramong 'em all as would live with his wife constant, if it was notfor the press;--only some of the very old ones, who couldn't helpthemselves."

  "And you call yourself a Conservative?"

  "Never mind what I call myself. That has nothing to do with whatwe're about now. You see that letter, Finn. There is nothing littleor dirty about us. We go in for morals and purity of life, and wemean to do our duty by the public without fear or favour. Your nameis mentioned there in a manner that you won't quite like, and I thinkI am acting uncommon kind by you in showing it to you before wepublish it." Phineas, who still held the slip in his hand, sat silentthinking of the matter. He hated the man. He could not endure thefeeling of being called Finn by him without showing his resentment.As regarded himself, he was thoroughly well inclined to kick Mr.Slide and his Banner into the street. But he was bound to thinkfirst of Lady Laura. Such a publication as this, which was nowthreatened, was the misfortune which the poor woman dreaded morethan any other. He, personally, had certainly been faultless in thematter. He had never addressed a word of love to Mr. Kennedy's wifesince the moment in which she had told him that she was engaged tomarry the Laird of Loughlinter. Were the letter to be published hecould answer it, he thought, in such a manner as to defend himselfand her without damage to either. But on her behalf he was bound toprevent this publicity if it could be prevented;--and he was boundalso, for her sake, to allow himself to be called Finn by this mostobnoxious editor. "In the ordinary course of things, Finn, it willcome out to-morrow morning," said the obnoxious editor.

  "Every word of it is untrue," said Phineas.

  "You say that, of course."

  "And I should at once declare myself willing to make such a statementon oath. It is a libel of the grossest kind, and of course therewould be a prosecution. Both Lord Brentford and I would be driven tothat."

  "We should be quite indifferent. Mr. Kennedy would hold us harmless.We're straightforward. My showing it to you would prove that."

  "What is it you want, Mr. Slide?"

  "Want! You don't suppose we want anything. If you think that thecolumns of the People's Banner are to be bought, you must haveopinions respecting the press of the day which make me pity you asone grovelling in the very dust. The daily press of London is pureand immaculate. That is, the morning papers are. Want, indeed! Whatdo you think I want?"

  "I have not the remotest idea."

  "Purity of morals, Finn;--punishment for the guilty;--defence for theinnocent;--support for the weak;--safety for the oppressed;--and arod of iron for the oppressors!"

  "But that is a libel."

  "It's very heavy on the old Earl, and upon you, and upon LadyLaura;--isn't it?"

  "It's a libel,--as you know. You tell me that purity of morals can besupported by such a publication as this! Had you meant to go on withit, you would hardly have shown it to me."

  "You're in the wrong box there, Finn. Now I'll tell you whatwe'll do,--on behalf of what I call real purity. We'll delay thepublication if you'll undertake that the lady shall go back to herhusband."

  "The lady is not in my hands."

  "She's under your influence. You were with her over at Dresden notmuch more than a month ago. She'd go sharp enough if you told her."

  "You never made a greater mistake in your life."

  "Say that you'll try."

  "I certainly will not do so."

  "Then it goes in to-morrow," said Mr. Quintus Slide, stretching outhis hand and taking back the slip.

  "What on earth is your object?"

  "Morals! Morals! We shall be able to say that we've done our best topromote domestic virtue and secure forgiveness for an erring wife.You've no notion, Finn, in your mind of what will soon be the hextentof the duties, privileges, and hinfluences of the daily press;--thedaily morning press, that is; for I look on those little eveningscraps as just so much paper and ink wasted. You won't interfere,then?"

  "Yes, I will;--if you'll give me time. Where is Mr. Kennedy?"

  "What has that to do with it? Do you write over to Lady Laura and theold lor
d and tell them that if she'll undertake to be at Loughlinterwithin a month this shall be suppressed. Will you do that?"

  "Let me first see Mr. Kennedy."

  Mr. Slide thought a while over that matter. "Well," said he at last,"you can see Kennedy if you will. He came up to town four or fivedays ago, and he's staying at an hotel in Judd Street."

  "An hotel in Judd Street?"

  "Yes;--Macpherson's in Judd Street. I suppose he likes to keep amongthe Scotch. I don't think he ever goes out of the house, and he'swaiting in London till this thing is published."

  "I will go and see him," said Phineas.

  "I shouldn't wonder if he murdered you;--but that's between you andhim."

  "Just so."

  "And I shall hear from you?"

  "Yes," said Phineas, hesitating as he made the promise. "Yes, youshall hear from me."

  "We've got our duty to do, and we mean to do it. If we see that wecan induce the lady to go back to her husband, we shall habstain frompublishing, and virtue will be its own reward. I needn't tell youthat such a letter as that would sell a great many copies, Finn."Then, at last, Mr. Slide arose and departed.