by TJ Klune
He flicked the tip of my nose. I squawked and batted his hand away because I hated when people did that.
“You know why.”
“I do?”
“Remember? Atop the tower?”
“The dragon’s keep.”
“Yeah. You and me.”
“All those stars.”
“I only saw you.”
“Sap,” I said, even though it made me feel warm. “Probably because you were breaking my heart.”
“Yeah,” he said. “Mine too. But do you remember what I said?”
But you have to believe me that it’s always been you. I promise. I promise. I promise, because when I look upon these stars, there is nothing I wish for more than you.
“I remember,” I said. As if I could ever forget. As if those words weren’t etched upon my very soul. “That was… smooth. In retrospect. At the time, I thought you were an asshole, but now? Way to go.”
He chuckled. “I am pretty good.”
“Mostly.”
He sobered when he said, “I meant it, Sam. Every word. It’s always been you for me. I loved you even before I knew what it meant. That’s why.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Me too.”
“Good. Also, I feel it should be said that I will still stab Ruv if he so much as looks at you funny. That’s not jealousy. It’s practicality. And I just don’t like his face.”
“Eh,” I said. “I’ll allow it.”
He leaned in and kissed me, slow and sweet as molasses. And I took everything he was giving me and gave back as much as I could. Because that’s what we did for each other. He might have been my cornerstone, but I wanted to be the same for him, even if he didn’t have the magic I did.
“It’s going to be all right, you know?” he said. “You’ll see. Everything is going to be just fine. I promise.”
And I believed him.
Chapter 8: Getting Bad-Touched by Grandma
“SO,” RANDALL said. “You decided to stop being a chickenshit and face your destiny like a real man?”
I looked at Ryan. “Is it too late to go back into our sex den?”
He made a face at me. “Yes, because you called it a sex den.”
“That’s what it is,” I muttered.
It was the next day after the shirtless pull-up contest, and Ryan had forced me out of the room, with no amount of promises of unlimited blowjays dissuading him from dragging me back out into the real world to face all the problems I would rather ignore. He had training to go to, and I had people to studiously avoid while I made my way down to the labs.
The problem with that was Randall loitering outside of the throne room. He had feigned surprise at running into us (“Oh, well, isn’t this positively fortuitous!”), which led me to believe he’d been waiting for us, like some old crazed stalker wanting to drag us to his basement where he’d dug a hole to keep us in. Knowing Randall, that wasn’t probably too far from the truth. I was convinced that one day, we would either finally understand each other or one of us would murder the other. I was leaning toward the murder side.
“Both of you need to follow me,” Randall said.
“That’s ominous,” Ryan said. “Please don’t hex me.”
“He’s going to put us in his hole,” I hissed at Ryan.
“He’s going to put us where?”
“No, not like that. Gross! Get your mind of the gutter.”
“I wasn’t even thinking about that until you said it!”
“Oh, so now you’re blaming me for your depraved mind? I’ll have you know I was innocent until I met you!”
“You’re friends with Gary,” Ryan said. “There’s nothing innocent about you.”
“Rude,” I said. “Also the truth. I’ll allow it.”
“Please,” Randall said. “Continue to waste my time. This will only better my mood.”
“Sorry, Randall,” Ryan said, bowing low. “I know your time is valuable.”
“I know your time is valuable,” I mocked under my breath.
“At least one of you respects me enough to say so,” Randall said. “Thank you, Knight Commander.”
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I must have not gotten the invitation to the Randall and Ryan Mutual Jerkoff Society.”
Ryan stared at me, horrified.
Randall’s ancient liver lips twitched briefly.
“He’s not going to hex you,” I told Ryan. “He would have to face my wrath.”
“Wailed the tiny, insignificant speck of dust,” Randall said.
“Please forgive Sam,” Ryan said. “He’s had a… troubling couple of days.”
“Really,” Randall said. “And how do you explain everything else?”
“Um,” Ryan said. “He’s had a… troubling life?”
“I really have,” I said. “Though, I blame a lot of other people rather than myself. It’s easier that way.”
“As enlightening as this has been,” Randall said, “and it truly has been in ways I did not anticipate, we have places to be.”
“See?” Ryan whispered to me. “Ominous.”
I was in complete agreement. “And where are we going?”
“Why,” Randall said, “to face your destiny, of course.”
“You’re doing that on purpose,” I accused.
“Probably,” Randall said. “But then, I’ve never met someone with a destiny before. Gods only know what this is going to do to your ego. I shiver at such a thought.”
“And I have to go too?” Ryan asked nervously. “Surely Sam will be just fine on his own.”
“Traitor!” I gasped, outraged. “Thrown me to the wolves already? What happened to all the promises of love and fealty after I fucked your butt?”
“Randall scares me,” Ryan said.
“This makes me happy,” Randall said.
“I also have knights to train. It’s Wednesday. On Wednesdays, we attach seventy-five-pound packs to our backs and run around an obstacle course in full armor. It’s actually a lot of fun. It boosts morale when we make it a contest.”
“Right,” I said. “Ryan has to go do that thing that just sounds terrible, and I’m sure Morgan needs me to work on my Grimoire in silence without anyone else around talking about things like fate and destiny and blah, blah, blah.”
“Pete’s overseeing the knights,” Randall said. “And Morgan’s waiting for us.”
“Oh,” Ryan said. “Crap. Okay, but. Why do I have to go?”
“You’re Sam’s cornerstone, are you not?” Randall asked. “Though, I suppose if you’re too busy, we can always ask Ruv to stand in on your behalf. I’m sure he and Sam won’t gaze into each other’s eyes at all.”
I couldn’t help but be impressed at Randall’s blatant manipulation of the bastard standing next to me. It was really rather devious, and he knew exactly what buttons to press.
“Ruv’s going to be there?” Ryan growled.
“Absolutely,” Randall said. “Probably wearing less than he did yesterday too. You know, when he won the pull-up contest.”
“He didn’t win—”
“I hope you realize you can’t control me that easily,” I told Randall. “I will never fall for your schemes.”
“I’m the only person standing in the way of you becoming a full-fledged wizard,” Randall said.
“Yep,” I said. “Do you want us to follow you now or…?”
AND OF course Vadoma was waiting for us in the labs. Because that’s how my life worked. She barely even looked up at me as we passed through the door. Randall shut it behind us and clicked the lock, an action wholly unnecessary but probably done on purpose to make the situation that much more awkward.
And it didn’t make the situation any easier to see Ruv standing at her side. He wore a pair of loose-fitting pants cinched at the waist and a vest open at the chest with no shirt underneath.
“Doesn’t he own full sets of clothing?” Ryan muttered. “No one wants to see any of tha
t.”
Far be it from me to argue with him, even if Ruv was of an attractive sort. I felt that old familiar tug at the sight of him, my magic recognizing him as the potential for something more. But it was muted, distant in comparison with the man standing next to me. It felt almost like an afterthought, the pang of something that could have been and nothing more.
Morgan stood at the opposite end of the labs, looking as tired as I’d ever seen him. Vadoma was standing at his side, hunched over the counter, flipping through—
“Hey!” I snapped, rushing forward. “What the hell do you think you’re doing? That’s my Grimoire!”
She didn’t even try and stop me as I pulled it away from her, slammed it closed, and cradled it against my chest. It wasn’t that I was ashamed about anything in there, but it was private. A wizard’s Grimoire was his legacy to the world, all his accomplishments and triumphs and mistakes written down into one tome for future generations to study when the time came. That didn’t mean I wanted anyone to read it now, especially since I tended to be a bit… descriptive about certain… things.
“That’s not a Grimoire, chava,” she said, sounding disgusted. “That is your diary. You write in pretty pink pen in your diary, little girl?”
“I told you,” Morgan said, an edge to his voice. “Every Grimoire is different. And it’s nothing you would understand, seeing as how you’re not a wizard. Sam is young, and his Grimoire reflects that. But it is still his. Not yours.”
It was almost enough to make me forgive him for being a liar and keeping shit from me for years. Close, but not quite.
“I’m not a wizard,” she agreed. “But I’ve known these books. I know what they hold. That is not the book of a man with a calling. That is the meanderings of a child.”
“I’m not a child.”
“In a corner on one page, you wrote Mrs. Sam Foxheart,” Vadoma said.
“Yes, well, I just wanted to see how it sounded—”
“Seven times.”
“I had to practice my signature, obviously—”
“And surrounded it with hearts.”
“It was romantic!”
“And then you did it on ten more pages.”
“Yeah, I might have gotten a little carried away. I can admit that. I have a problem, okay? But I can change. I’m not addicted to it! I swear!”
“You hear that?” Ryan said to Ruv. “He wants to be my wife. Not yours. Mine. Ryan Foxheart for the win!” He stopped just short of fist-pumping when he started to frown. “Wait a minute. My wife?”
“I trust Sam,” Morgan said, “to do what he’s supposed to do. Yes, he is young. And yes, he is sometimes prone to distraction. But he is still my apprentice. And I will stand by him until the end of my days.”
“Wow,” I said. “That was pretty close to getting you off my shit list. Well played, Morgan. It almost was enough to make up for the fact that you’ve lied to me since you’ve known me.”
“He can also be a vindictive little bastard,” Randall said. “Turned my nose into a penis once, can you believe that? All because I had the temerity to criticize him the barest amounts.”
I scowled at him. “You told me I was a waste of space and that Morgan would be better off with a doorknob as an apprentice.”
“The barest amounts,” Randall repeated.
“It’s a work in progress,” Morgan said to Vadoma. “And if you have as much experience as you claim, then you’ll know that’s how it goes. My own still isn’t completed, and I doubt it ever will be. It’s a living document, something that grows with every life experience.”
“Not the same,” Vadoma said, pointing a finger at Morgan. “You know this. The both of you do. He is not like you. He is not like the others. He is different. And your complacency will either end in his death or all of ours.”
“That certainly sucked the fun out of the room,” I muttered. “We can’t possibly be related.”
She narrowed her eyes at me. “I assure you we are. Even if I couldn’t see the gypsy in your skin, I would know it from the magic that leaks from you with every step you take. The dook you have in your blood is not mine. I have sight. I see the shapes of things to come. Yours is zor. Strength. In the earth. In the heart. But you lack these things. The focus. You are careless. A budjo. A showman, not a shaman. But we are the same, regardless. You have come from Dika. And Dika comes from me. Which means you come from me. And I have known you for a long, long time.”
“I still don’t see what that has to do with—”
“What will you do?” Vadoma asked me. “When your cornerstone dies and you still walk amongst your people? Will you still believe the path you took was of the righteous?”
And that—
That was not okay.
That was never okay.
I took a step forward. “Are you threatening me or Ryan? Because if it was me, I could stand for that. I could deal… with that. But if you’re threatening him, then we’re about to have a fucking problem.”
Her dark eyes flashed with something I didn’t recognize. “You care for him,” she said.
“More than anything.”
“Because he’s yours.”
“And I’m his.”
“For how long?”
I blinked. Because I didn’t— “What do you mean?”
“Yes, Vadoma,” Morgan said, sounding bitchier than I’d ever heard him before. It was really rather remarkable for a man of his age and stature to sound like he was ready to scratch a motherfucker’s eyes out. “What exactly do you mean?”
She didn’t even flinch. Steel balls, that one. I gave her a little more credit than I had at first. If Morgan had used that tone on me, I probably would have been running in the opposite direction.
“I have seen the stars,” she said. “I have followed the bones where they’ve fallen. Unless Sam of Wilds gathers the dragons of Verania, the world will fall into darkness and all will be lost.”
I laughed. “Get the fuck outta here.”
She wasn’t laughing.
Neither was anyone else. Even Ryan looked a little spooked.
“Guys,” I tried. “Look. She’s a fortune-teller. I don’t care what she’s known for. I don’t care where she came from. I don’t care who she is to me. She’s an old kook, and this is bullshit. All of this is bullshit.”
“What did he say to you?” she asked, cocking her head. “When you appeared before him?”
“Who?” I was so done with this shit. Maybe I could get the King to banish her from the City of Lockes and I could go back to living my life the way I wanted it to be. The way I wanted—
“The Great White,” she said softly. “The Father of Dragons. The oldest in all of creation. He who created the world on his back. What did he say to you when you stood before him?”
I have awoken, O human child. In this forest deep, in the dark of the wild. And I have seen what is in your heart. Take heed of my warning: you are not ready.
“Nothing,” I said. “He didn’t say anything because it wasn’t real. None of it was real. You tricked me. Somehow. Poisoned me. Made me hallucinate. I don’t know what you’re planning. I don’t know why you’re here. But it’s not going to work. The dragon said nothing. He said nothing because it wasn’t real. No one has seen the Great White in centuries. He’s long dead. His bones are somewhere that will never be found.”
“Not a word?”
I didn’t look away. “Not a word.”
“Morgan,” she said.
“I’ve told you, Sam,” Morgan said. “About the rumors. About a dark man rising.”
“Have they been substantiated? By anything?”
“No,” he said. “Nothing that can be considered concrete. But if there is a threat against the Crown, if there’s the smallest chance that she’s right, we owe it to Verania to investigate. Sam, we are the hands of the King, and sometimes the hand must make a fist even if the threat is hidden in shadow.”
“So we’re supposed to take
her word on it?” I asked angrily. “This woman who banished my mother as if she was nothing? She took away everything because who she fell in love with didn’t have the same skin color.”
“Dika made her choice—”
“Only because you didn’t give her anything else to choose!”
“Your ire comes quickly,” Vadoma said. “Is this because you are frightened, or is this how you are? Does your fury flow through you at the slightest of provocations?”
“No,” I said.
“No to which? Chava, we are governed by thousands of years of tradition. You may think it archaic. You may think it unfair. But this is the way it has always been. Just because she is my daughter did not give me the right to ignore what my ancestors had given me.”
“She didn’t need you,” I said. “Look where she is. She’s happy. She’s healthy. She has a family. She is loved. If she had stayed with you, if she had forsaken my father, could she have said the same?”
“Her path split,” Vadoma said simply. “Because she chose to follow her heart. Like yours. I have seen the path you are taking, Sam of Wilds. I have seen the possibilities that lie before you. He will come for you and take all that you hold dear.”
A hand fell on my shoulder. I thought it’d be Ryan or Morgan, offering the smallest of comforts the way they did best. Imagine my surprise, then, when I glanced over and saw it was Randall. “Sam,” he said. “We wouldn’t ask you this if we didn’t think it was important.”
I swallowed back the sharp retort. “You haven’t asked me anything yet.”
“And I’m not going to,” Vadoma said.
Randall’s hand tightened on my shoulder.
The phuro began to smile. “I’m going to show you.”
“ARE YOU sure about this?” Gary asked me. “I mean, the last time you were mostly nude, covered in ancient symbols, and about to have weird powder blown in your face, you woke up after having been randomly adopted by cave trolls in the middle of the Dark Woods.”
“Oh yeah,” I said, wincing as Vadoma slathered more green paste on my back, muttering in an ancient tongue as she drew on my bare skin. The only thing keeping me from a public indecency charge was a thin cotton wrap around my hips, but even that almost wasn’t enough. I was pretty sure if anyone looked hard enough, they’d be able to see my balls. “I’d forgotten about that. Sometimes I wish our adventures weren’t so zany. Why can’t we have normal adventures?”