Business as Usual (Off The Subject)

by Swank, Denise Grover

  Ben

  Every time the damn door opens, I look up, hoping she’ll walk in. You think I’d give up after two weeks, but hope fucking springs eternal. Apparently, I’ve become an asshat who spouts clichéd platitudes.

  I’m an idiot.

  Brittany thinks it’s hilarious. She noticed what I was doing the night after she lost our bet. “Who you looking for, Masterson? Your dream girl?”

  When I didn’t answer, she grabbed my arm and literally squealed like a damn girl. “You are!”

  “Shut up, Britt.”

  Of course she hadn’t shut up, and was still teasing me mercilessly. So tonight, I’ve been fighting the urge to watch the door, which has proven harder than expected.

  I’m pulling a draft beer when the bell on the door jingles and a cold wind gusts into the room.

  Brittany stares at the door, her body stiffening. “She’s here.”

  I instantly know who she’s talking about. She’s faked me out before, but this time something’s different.

  “Ben, I’m not joking,” she murmurs, “and something’s not right.”

  I spin around and see Alexa standing in the doorway, scanning the room with fear in her eyes. I’m about to go around the bar to check on her when the door burst open behind her and Tina walks in, her face flushed. An evil smile lights up her face as she loops her arm through Alexa’s and drags her to a table. Three guys and a couple of girls join them, each one of them looking like they’re full of piss and vinegar. They put Alexa between Tina and a big guy with tattoo sleeves on his arms and his neck. His ears are pierced and he has gauges. A dumbbell in his eyebrow reflects the light.

  “I’m going over to check on them,” I say, my anger rising.

  “I was about to suggest the same thing,” Brittany says.

  I’m not a huge guy, but at six foot and one-eighty-five, I’m not a shrimp either. Still, it’s easy to see that the big tattooed guy could take me out with one hand tied behind his back, never mind his friends.

  How in the world did Alexa get mixed up with this group and how does she know Tina?

  I stop at the edge of the table. “How is everyone tonight?”

  “Well, I’ll be damned,” Tina says. “If it isn’t Virgin Ben. What a coincidence. I was telling you all about Reed’s sister—”

  “It’s good to see you again, Ben,” Alexa interrupts. Her startling blue eyes lock onto mine and I suddenly know who she is, even if she desperately doesn’t want me to. Her black wig has thrown me off. But I can tell it’s not the only thing that’s going on with her. She’s genuinely upset about something.

  “You sneaky devil, Curly Sue.” Tina asks, leaning forward and looking into my face with a sly grin. “Is Ben the guy of your choosing? Because I wouldn’t blame you. He’s quite yummy.” She licks her lips in a slow seductive manner.

  I resist the urge to shudder. I’m not sure what Tina’s talking about, but Alexa looks horrified. “I’m glad you came in. You left your scarf the last time you were here.” I gesture to the back room. “I have it in back. Why don’t you come get it?”

  She starts to get up, but Tina grabs her arm and pulls her down. “Wait a minute.” Her gaze travels from me to Alexa. “Whatever goes on between you two needs to happen within my view.” She winks at Alexa. “I’m sure you’re not surprised to find out that I like to watch.”

  Alexa blushes.

  What the hell is Tina up to?

  Tina crosses her arms on the table and rests her boobs on top of them, making her cleavage into an even deeper vee. “Why don’t you just bring the scarf out to her?”

  I refuse to visibly react. “She has to come back and describe it to me while I look at it. It’s one of the bar rules.”

  Tina’s grip on Alexa’s arm tightens. “Lexi needs to get another drink in her first. She’s falling behind. Maybe later.”

  Alexa glances away, resignation darkening her eyes.

  I’m torn. I can tell she doesn’t want to be with Tina, but she’s not taking the opportunity to get away either. Still, I’m not ready to let this go. Something’s definitely off. “So, what are you all doing here tonight? Don’t you usually hang out at the Voodoo Lounge, Tina?”

  She laughs and surprise widens her eyes. “Good memory, Benjamin. I invited Curly out with us and she demanded that we come here. Now I know why.”

  I’m curious about why she wanted to come here, but getting her away from Tina seems like the more important goal. “The band’s about to start in thirty minutes. You owe me a dance, Alexa.” I wink playfully, even as I resist the urge to clench my fists.

  She looks up into my eyes. “Oh yeah. I’m counting on it.”

  Tina grins. “Remember, when you two crazy kids make out, I get to watch.”

  Alexa blushes again and the tattooed guy scoots closer to her.

  “What can I get you guys to drink?” I fight to keep my voice even.

  “Alexa and I will take a rum and Coke, double the rum in both.”

  Alexa shoots me a look of desperation again. Is this some hazing ritual? I’m pretty damn sure Tina’s not in any sorority or even club for that matter. So why does she seem so intent on getting Alexa shitfaced. This is just wrong.

  I finish taking the rest of their drink orders and head behind the bar.

  Brittany sides up next to me. “Well?”

  “Damned if I can figure out what’s going on.” I tell her what Tina said and how Alexa reacted. “She obviously doesn’t want to be there, but she’s not leaving either. I tried to give her an excuse to leave the table, but the only one Tina would accept was for her to dance with me. But if I actually do that, Tony’s gonna have a coronary.”

  Brittany narrows her gaze on the table. “Don’t you worry about him. First of all, he’s not here, so he’ll never find out. But even if he did, he’s a big softie and he’ll understand. How about I go in the back and offer the band a free round if they start sooner?”

  “Good idea.”

  Brittany heads into the back while I take the drinks over to the table. I’m careful not to mix them up. “Double rum, on the house.” I wink at Tina, hoping she doesn’t check Alexa’s drink. I only put enough rum in it to make it smell like alcohol.

  “Careful, Alexa,” Tina says. “I just might insist on a threesome after all.”

  Alexa looks like she’s about to puke.

  “I’m afraid I can only handle one woman at time.” I force out a laugh.

  “I’ll be gentle.” Tina laughs and her friends laugh with her.

  “Yeah, I have the claw marks to prove that’s a fucking lie,” says a guy directly across the table from Alexa.

  I serve the rest of the drinks and start a tab. To my relief, the band has come out and begun to warm up.

  Brittany is back behind the bar wearing a shit-eating grin.

  “They did this for a free drink?”

  She shrugs. “I flashed ’em my tits too.”

  My mouth drops open. “You did what?”

  She puts a hand on her hip. “It wasn’t a big deal. Half of them have seen them anyway.”

  I’m shocked speechless and it takes me a couple of seconds to respond. “Thanks, Britt.”

  She shrugs again, looking uncomfortable in face of my gratitude. “Hell, it was nothin’. I’m pretty damn proud of these tits. I breast feed two kids and they’re still perky.”

  I laugh. “That they are.”

  “You totally check them out, don’t you?”

  “I have balls and I’m still breathing. Of course I check them out.”

  When the band starts to play, everyone who wants a drink has one. It’s the perfect time for a break.

  “Go get her, Romeo,” Britt says.

  “Yeah.” I wipe my sweaty hands on my jeans, surprised by how nervous I am. I walk around the counter and stop next to their table. “Alexa, I’m taking a break. Let’s do this.” I try not to sound too eager because I’m sure Tina will latch onto it and use it to her advantage.
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  “Yeah.” She starts to get up, but Tina pulls her down again.

  “She has to finish her drink first.”

  What the fuck is her deal?

  The drink is half-gone and Alexa gulps down the rest. Tina belly laughs. “Damn girl. Don’t be so eager.”

  She just pushes her chair back without saying anything and walks around the tattooed guy. He reaches out to grab her ass and she spins around, her face contorting with rage. “Don’t you ever touch me again or I really will cut off your balls. Then I’ll shove them down your throat.” I have no doubt she would follow through on her threat.

  The group at the table laughs and I grab her hand and pull her away to the dance floor. Britt has watched the entire interaction and she looks worried.

  The band’s first song is the furthest you can get from a ballad, but I need answers, so I pull her close, resting my hands lightly on her waist. Her hands lift and she seems unsure of where to put them. They land on my shoulders, trembling.

  Now that we’re here, now that she’s in my arms, everything flees from my head and all I can think about is holding her. I breathe in her scent, a combination of apples and honey, and I realize I’ll never smell this scent again without thinking about her. I’m the furthest you can get from a romantic, so the thought catches me by surprise.

  “Thank you,” she finally says.

  Her words bring me back to reality. “Why are you with Tina when you obviously don’t want to be?”

  “It’s a long story.” She sighs and rests her cheek against my chest.

  Her touch is electrifying and I suck in a deep breath. What the fuck is wrong with me? “I can wait you out all night,” I say, “but I’m not letting you go back until you tell me.” I’m not sure this is the right way to handle it, not after watching her threaten Tattoo Guy. She obviously bites when backed into a corner, but she has to know that I’m on her side.

  She relaxes into me a bit and stumbles. My grip tightens on her waist to keep her upright.

  “Sorry,” she says. “Tina tried to get me drunk before we even left her apartment.” She looks up at me, her blue eyes wide with gratitude. “Thanks for not putting very much rum in my drink.”

  I stare down at her, lost in the depth of her eyes. I give myself a mental shake. “You seem too classy for Tina and her group, so what’s this all about?”

  She continues to study my face as though she’s trying to determine my trustworthiness. “She has something I want. Apparently, I have something she wants. Mutual need is the cornerstone of all business transactions.” Her face has changed with this statement, as though she’s weary.

  “I know her from working with her in the math lab. Maybe I can help you and save you the grief.”

  Hope flickers in her eyes before resignation replaces it. “If it were that easy, I’d jump at the chance.”

  She won’t tell me what she wants, so I decide to find out what Tina wants. “So she’s giving you something in exchange for getting you drunk?” I ask. “That seems bizarre, even for someone like her.”

  Alexa looks away, her cheeks turning pink. “She thinks I’m repressed and wants to loosen me up. Why she cares, I have no idea. I’m not sure she knows either, other than that it’s a game to her.”

  “What else does she want?”

  The pink in her cheeks darkens. “I have to make out with some guy tonight. She has to see it.”

  “Why?” I knew Tina was sleazy, but this is unbelievable. Then a new thought bursts into my mind. “Who with? That guy you just told off?” My rage catches me by surprise.

  She shakes her head. “No. I insisted it had to be a guy of my choosing. If it was him…” her voice softens. “I want this information, but I don’t want it that bad.”

  I place a finger under her chin and tilt it up so I can study her face. “What makes this information so valuable to you that you’ll go through with so much humiliation to get it?”

  She hesitates. “Have you ever loved someone so much you’d give up everything for them?”

  Have I? No, it’s a sad fact, but there it is. I never really loved Sabrina. She forced the relationship on me, not that I fought it after we slept together at the frat party. She was good in bed and it was easy in the beginning, before her true colors started showing through the cracks of her lacquered persona. For a while I ignored the neediness and the constant bitching, expecting her to break up with me since I was no longer fulfilling her expectations of constant attention and socializing. And then when I ended it I paid the price for all those months of complacency. But when I look into Alexa’s face, I realize I want that kind of love for someone. The all-encompassing, all-consuming, you can’t think about anyone or anything else kind of love. This girl makes me think that kind of love is possible, especially with someone like her. And that scares the shit out of me. “No.”

  “Neither have I. I’d like to think I do, but honestly I don’t think I would have done what he did for me. He gave up everything and this is my chance to make it up to him. So one night of humiliation is nothing. I can endure it to help him.”

  My chest constricts and I feel like I’m drowning.

  She loves someone else.

  I want to ask her who he is, but I don’t want to know. Is it the guy she was with two weeks ago? It seems unlikely. They seemed too casual and he’s not with her now. I’m more confused than ever.

  The song ends and I look across the room, hatred filling every pore of my body for the person who’s putting Alexa through this charade. Tina’s watching us with amusement. I look down into Alexa’s face and she steps away from me. Our song is done. Our commitment is up.

  Only I’m not ready to let her go yet. Maybe I can save her at least part of her embarrassment.

  I cradle her cheeks and stare into her eyes, looking for any sign that she finds my touch revolting. But her breath comes in short bursts and her pupils are dilated. My thumb strokes her right cheek bone, and it amazes me how smooth her skin is. I should stop prolonging my torture, but I don’t want to hurry this moment. I want to sear it into my brain.

  I lower my face to hers and her mouth parts in anticipation. Our lips touch lightly and I run my tongue along her upper lip. Her hands return to my shoulders as she takes a step closer, pressing her chest to mine, her mouth parting as she sighs. My tongue accepts the invitation, twining with hers.

  Her arms tighten around my neck and I slide a hand behind her head. Blood rushes to my groin and the way she’s pressed against me, she has to know I’m getting a hard-on, yet she doesn’t step away. She presses closer instead.

  Still, I take my time with the kiss, making it last. I want more, so much more, but we’re on a dance floor, surrounded by at least thirty people, being watched intently by a group of perverts in the corner. I want to keep this pure. I want to take the thing Tina meant as a punishment for Alexa and turn it into something meaningful. At least for me. But the way Alexa clings to me tells me the experience has power for her too, even if it’s just because she’s sacrificing herself for some other guy.

  I finally lift my head and stare into her lust-filled eyes and I want to curse the gods who put her in my path only to take her away.

  “Thank you,” she breathes out with a sigh.

  “Do think that was enough to appease her?”

  Her eyes cloud with momentary confusion. “Oh…yeah.”

  “If it’s not, I want you to promise me that you’ll ask me for help.” I sound like a pervert myself, but the thought of someone like Tattoo Guy pawing her nauseates me.

  She seems to understand my intention because she gives me a grateful look. Tears fill her eyes. “Thank you.”

  I want to kiss her again, to take her out the back door and away from Tina and her vile crew, but that’s not what Alexa wants. I step back and interweave my fingers with hers. It takes every ounce of fortitude in my body to take her back to that table. When we get there, I pull out her chair to show this table full of disgusting low-lifes ho
w to treat a woman.

  Tina claps her hands. “I think there might be hope for you two yet.” She waggles her eyebrows at Alexa, then looks up at me. “I told you Reed’s—”

  Alexa leans forward, her eyes wild. “I think I need another drink.”

  I stare at her in disbelief. She’s trying to interrupt Tina because she thinks I don’t know who she really is—Alexa Pendergraft, baby sister to that asshole Reed Pendergraft. And with a sigh, I realize it’s better this way, all around, because I would throw everything away to get one shot with this girl.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Ben

  I stuff down my disillusion and disappointment. This is for the best and the sooner I let her go, the better off I’ll be.

  Brittany shakes her head when I walk around the end of the bar. “Damn, Ben. That was …” Her voice trails off.

  I lift my eyebrows and she remains silent. I snort. “In all these months working together, I’ve never seen you at a loss for words.”

  She leans an elbow on the counter and looks at me with appreciation. “After that kiss, you make me want to rethink my rule about not dating coworkers.”

  “Drop it, Britt,” I mutter.

  She moves closer. “Why aren’t you happy? Not only did your mystery girl come back, but she danced with you and you two shared one helluva a kiss.”

  “She’s in love with someone else.” I shake my head with self-disgust, my chest heavy. I’ve never felt this way about a girl before, and it’s just my luck that I turn into a love-struck moron over a girl who belongs to someone else. Maybe it’s karma.

  Brittany tilts her head to one side and scrunches her face in disbelief. “Uh…I saw that kiss, Masterson. There’s no fucking way that girl is in love with someone else.”

  “She says she is. That’s why she’s putting herself through this humiliation. Because Tina has some kind of information and Alexa’s trying to find out what it is to help some guy.”

  Brittany’s eyebrows furrow as she gives the situation thought. “You realize that makes absolutely no sense, right?”

  “Tell me something I don’t fucking know.”