Drake and Ashley: The Complete Story
Page 38
A smile suddenly forms on his mouth. “Okay. I have an idea that I hope you’ll like.”
“I’m sure I’ll like whatever you come up with.” Truthfully, I’m just glad we finally have a chance to be together. After all the starts and stops this week, I’d begun to think we wouldn’t see each other until the weekend.
“Can you give me forty-five minutes and then meet me at my house?” Drake asks.
I wonder what he’s planning, but I’m intrigued. “Yes, I can do that.”
He tugs me into his arms, then kisses me with passion. A moment later he pulls away. “I’ll see you in a little while.”
I smile. “You’ve made me curious, Drake.”
He grins. “Good. I like you curious.”
Forty-five minutes later I park at the curb in front of his house. I’ve taken the time to touch-up my make-up and hair, and I’m feeling a mix of excitement and anticipation as I approach his front door.
A moment after I ring the bell, Drake opens his door. The lovely smell of food drifts towards me, and my stomach rumbles.
“Come in, beautiful lady,” he says as he sweeps his hand towards his living room.
I walk in and take in the breathtaking view of the city at night. I haven’t been in his house since I’d worked as his assistant. It feels strange to be there as his girlfriend, but I like it.
“What’s with all the mystery?” I say as I turn to him.
He laughs. “No mystery. I just thought it would be nice to eat here instead of at a restaurant.”
My gaze goes to his dining room, where he’s set it for two, complete with lit candles.
“I just needed time to go get the food,” he adds.
“It looks beautiful,” I say as I gesture towards the dining room. “And the food smells delicious.”
He leads me to the table, pulls my chair out for me, then sits across from me. We talk about our day as we eat, and everything is going smoothly until I decide I need to know why he hasn’t told me that Jasmine went with him to Chicago.
“Your new assistant seems to be working out really well,” I say to get the ball rolling.
“Yeah.” He seems reluctant to discuss her.
“From what I can tell, she’s a really hard worker.”
He nods. “I think she’ll work out.”
“I’m sure Barbara’s happy about that.”
He laughs. “Yes. She was thrilled when I finally hired someone.”
“Did you have very many applicants?” I don’t know why it’s important that I know why he had to hire someone gorgeous, as well as competent.
“We only had a few that were qualified. Jasmine was the most qualified.”
My lips turn up in a slight smile. “That’s great, Drake.”
He sets his fork down and stares at me. “What’s this all about, Ashley?”
“What do you mean?”
“Why are we talking about my assistant on the one evening we’ve finally managed to spend together?”
I set my utensils down as well, ready to face my concerns head-on. “Did Jasmine go with you to Chicago?”
Drake’s face blanches, then he clears his throat before answering. “Yes.”
At least he didn’t deny it. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I, uh, I didn’t think it was important.” His eyebrows bunch. “Why do you ask?”
“I wanted to see if you’d tell me the truth.”
A frown settles on his handsome face. “Did you think I’d lie to you?”
Not sure at first if I should confess the truth, I decide to be honest. After all, that’s what I’m asking him to be. “I really hoped you wouldn’t.” I sigh softly. “But I wasn’t sure if you would tell me or not.”
“You asked as if you already knew the answer.”
“Yes. I did.”
Confusion flits across his face. “Did Jasmine tell you?”
I nod, not about to deny the truth. Maybe he’ll be angry with her and fire her. I know that’s not going to happen though.
“Oh,” he says.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I told you, I didn’t think it was important.”
Anger begins to simmer within me. “You didn’t think it was important to tell your girlfriend that your gorgeous assistant went out of town with you?”
A blush rises on his face. “What do her looks have to do with anything? If she was ugly you wouldn’t care if she came with me?”
He’s kind of got me there, but I quickly rebound. “It’s not just her looks—” Who am I kidding? It’s all about her looks. “It just seems like you purposely didn’t tell me.” I sigh. “I even asked you earlier if you were lonely on your trip. Why didn’t you tell me then that you had company?”
An image of the two of them lounging together in his hotel room roars to life in my mind, and a wave of jealousy billows into a hot flame.
Nineteen
DRAKE
Trying to give an aura of being in complete control, although my mind is reeling, I lean back in my chair and gaze at Ashley. I hadn’t expected this attack from her, and I’m frantically trying to come up with an explanation.
In all reality, she’s right. Not wanting to stir up this nest of hornets I currently find myself in, I’d purposely avoided telling her that Jasmine came with me. I’d known she would be upset if she knew, and now she’s proven me right.
Yet I’m also frustrated. Why should I have to base my business decisions—decisions I’d previously made solely on the basis of what’s best for my firm—on Ashley’s emotions? I shouldn’t, and I’m beginning to resent the fact that I’m letting those emotions make me doubt my decision now. Jasmine was a tremendous help on that trip and I don’t regret taking her with me.
“Why does it bother you so much that she came with me?” I ask, keeping my tone of voice non-confrontational.
“That’s not what bothers me, Drake.”
“I’m confused. What’s bothering you?”
Her delicate jaw tightens. “The fact that you didn’t tell me.”
My irritation gets the better of me. “Shall I report to you whenever she attends meetings with me or if I ask her to stay late?”
Ashley’s eyes flash, and I know I’m pushing her, but I need her to see the ridiculousness of her point of view.
“I don’t know. Maybe you should.”
“Now you’re just being unreasonable.” I gaze at her a moment. “Do you mean to tell me you’ve never gone to lunch with a co-worker without telling me?”
She flinches slightly and I know I’ve hit a nerve.
“That’s not the same thing,” she says.
“Isn’t it?”
“Going to lunch is not the same as spending the night out of town together.”
I remember how my thoughts strayed to the way Jasmine’s yoga pants clung to her curves when she visited my hotel room, and guilt slices through me. “We had separate rooms,” I say in my defense.
“So you say.”
“What exactly are you accusing me of?” I wanted this to be a nice evening together, but things seem to be going off the rails at a rapid pace.
Her lips press together. “I’m not accusing you of anything, except not telling me the truth.”
“You asked and I told you. How is that not telling the truth?” Exasperation tinges my words.
“Lying by omission, Drake. You didn’t tell me until I specifically asked you.”
I lift my napkin from my lap and throw it on the table. “What in the hell is your problem? I do many things in my business, and I don’t intend to pass them by you first.”
Her eyes flash again, and I brace myself for what is certainly coming.
“I saw the way your eyes were glued to her ass when she walked out of your office earlier.” Her eyes narrow. “If you would do that right in front of me, I wonder what you would do when you’re out of town with her—and alone at a hotel.”
I run my fingers through my hair, relieved I’ve done not
hing wrong—even if Ashley’s right about my gaze wandering where it shouldn’t have. And then I’m offended. “Do you really think I’d do that?”
“I know you’ve dated a lot of women, Drake. A lot. And you’ve never been committed to just one before.” She lifts her chin. “I mean, you slept with me while you were still dating The Wi . . . I mean, Rachel.” Her eyebrows pull together. “By the way, don’t you think Jasmine looks a lot like Rachel?”
Her question comes out of left field, and I stare at her. I hadn’t thought about it before, but I guess I can understand why Ashley would see a resemblance. “Jasmine is my assistant, not a woman I’ve been dating.”
Ashley frowns, like she’s considering her next words. “And we both know what happened with your last assistant.”
It’s like she’s punched me in the gut, and I struggle to come up with a response. “Is that what you think of me? That I’ll sleep with any woman I’m attracted to? Even if she works for me?”
“All I know is what I’ve experienced first hand. I was your assistant, and you slept with me.”
“It’s not like we hadn’t been intimate before that,” I say.
“That’s not the point.”
My exasperation deepens, and I know I’ll never understand women. Or at least this woman. “Then what is?”
“The point is that your self-control is questionable.”
For a moment I can’t help but think she’s right. But then I get defensive. “Hold on. What about our agreement to not sleep together until we were serious? What about the self-control that took?”
“Are you saying that if I’d suggested we just forget that and jump into bed, you would have said no?”
I think about it and remember how many times I’d wanted to toss aside that agreement. I decide to be honest, hoping that will win me points. “No, I can’t say that I would have refused.”
She sits up straighter, as if she’s won the argument. “You see? That’s exactly what I mean. The only reason you showed self-control was because I made you.” Victory shines in her eyes. “Am I right?”
“Yes,” I say begrudgingly, thinking I’ve miscalculated that honesty is the best policy in this situation. “You’re right.”
Twenty
ASHLEY
It’s a hollow victory. He’s only confirmed my worry that if given the opportunity, he’ll do whatever he feels like, and I realize that all along my trust has been based on the fact that no one else has caught his interest since I’ve come into his life. But now that Jasmine is in the picture, everything’s changed, and my trust is melting away like an ice cube in a glass of warm water.
“I’m confused,” Drake says.
“About what?”
“How does this conversation have anything to do with Jasmine?”
I hate the way her name sounds in his mouth, but I hold back a grimace. “It’s not really about her,” I say, wondering if I should confess my true feelings.
He sighs, clearly exasperated with me. “Then what?”
I want to tell him I’m feeling insecure, but I’m afraid it will make me look weak, making me less attractive to him. Instead, I meet his steely gaze and say, “I don’t trust you, Drake.”
He recoils as if I’ve slapped him. “You don’t trust me? What have I ever done to make you doubt my faithfulness?”
It’s hard to explain my unreasonable feelings, but I decide to give it a try. “Nothing.”
“Then what the hell, Ashley?”
I sigh, frustrated with myself as much as with him—and his history. “It’s just that you’ve always been kind of a player and I’m worried that it’s in your DNA. That if someone more interesting comes along, you’ll . . . well, you’ll get caught up in the moment.”
The memory of him making love to me just hours after Rachel left his cabin comes to mind. Why would he change now?
DRAKE
I rub the back of my neck as I take in Ashley’s accusations. It’s hard to argue with her. For as long as I can remember, I have been a player. I’ve done whatever the hell I feel like, with whomever the hell I want. And I’ve enjoyed it. Her words make my mind spin. Am I ready to give up that lifestyle? Am I ready to be committed to only her? I love her, there’s no doubt about that, but now I’m beginning to second guess my decision to commit only to her. Am I destined to fail? Is she right, and it’s in my DNA—beyond my control?
I think about my interaction with Jasmine at the hotel. If I hadn’t been committed to Ashley, would I have done something with Jasmine?
No. She’s my employee.
But if she weren’t an employee, I have to admit there would be no reason for me not to pursue her—if I wasn’t committed to Ashley.
But you are committed to Ashley. Aren’t you?
I’m not even thirty yet. Am I ready to settle down with one woman?
“Drake?”
I gaze at Ashley and my heart warms with the love I feel for her. My voice is soft as I speak. “What do you want me to do? What can I do to prove you wrong?”
ASHLEY
At the look in Drake’s eyes, I almost tell him to forget what I said. But the fear I have is real, and pretending it’s not there won’t make it go away.
I consider what he can do to prove his faithfulness—that he’ll always be faithful. Deep in my heart I know there’s nothing he can do, not really. Even if we were married there would be no guarantees.
“I don’t know,” I finally say.
Drake throws his hands in the air, then settles them in his lap as he shakes his head. “That puts me in kind of a tough position, doesn’t it?” He frowns. “Damned if I do and damned if I don’t.”
My appetite has vanished, but I pick at my food in order to avoid looking at him.
“Maybe you’re right,” he says, drawing my attention back to his face. “But you can’t say I didn’t warn you.”
“What?” Where’s he going with this?
“Don’t you remember? That day you worked at my house and we ended up in my bed?”
How can I forget? I’d been working as his assistant for a week by then, and was desperate to date him. “Yes.”
“I told you then that I’m a selfish lowlife.”
I speak without thinking. “But that was only because I’d manipulated you into thinking it was your fault that we made love that day.”
His eyebrows shoot skyward, and I realize my mistake. “You manipulated me?”
“Only because I didn’t want you to fire me,” I say in a desperate attempt to backpedal.
Now his eyes narrow. “You manipulated me?”
“I’m sorry, Drake.”
“Is that what you’re doing now?”
I shake my head in a strong show of denial. “No. No, only that one time.”
He stares at me like he’s cataloguing all of our interactions, trying to pick out the times I might have twisted things to suit myself. “Those talking points. That was you trying to control me, wasn’t it?”
“No,” I say as panic builds inside me. Because he’s right. I was trying to control him, trying to get him to commit to me. “Not on purpose.”
“Not on purpose,” he echoes, then his eyes flash. “And when you were at my cabin—” A bitter smile lifts his mouth. “You know, when we weren’t having sex anymore?”
My heart pounds as I wait to hear what he’s about to accuse me of.
“When you came into my room and insisted that you had to sleep in my bed. Was that you trying to get me to say that I love you?”
Pain, sharp and bright, pierces my heart. “No. I promise, no.”
“You promise? And I should believe your promises?”
“I love you, Drake. I do.”
He doesn’t respond in kind, only gazes at me.
As I look at his face a crack opens up in my heart, and I fear I’ve lost him.
Twenty-One
DRAKE
I look at Ashley’s face and no longer know what to believe. Has she been m
anipulating me all along? Does she even love me? Do I love her? Confusion and uncertainty batter my brain, giving me the beginning of a headache.
Then I remember another incident where she maneuvered the situation—when she was playing my maid for Rachel’s sake. It’s true that I’d asked her to, but I remember the way she used her body to draw my attention away from Rachel and to herself. That was manipulative.
Then I think about the way I felt when she was dating Jonathan. Was she just trying to make me jealous? What about Evan now? Working late with him? What is that all about?
Wherever I look I seem to find examples of her playing with my emotions, with my heart.
This is just as you feared, Drake. Falling for a woman just so she can break your heart.
The old panic comes roaring back, the panic I felt when I first realized I was falling in love with her—my fear that giving my heart to her would open me up to being hurt. And now here we are, and I’m feeling betrayed by this woman who I thought I loved.
Did she trick me into feeling that way? Or am I just making excuses because I know I’m destined to be the selfish lowlife I warned her of and destined to fail in keeping my commitment to her?
I don’t have any answers.
Then I realize what I have to do to find out. I gaze at her a moment, then say, “I think we should date other people.”
Let’s see what she does with that.
ASHLEY
At first I think I heard him wrong. Why would he suggest we date other people? Then I understand. He wants to be free to be with Jasmine. Searing pain lances through me, but I force it down, not wanting him to see how much he’s hurting me.
Keeping my voice unnaturally calm, I say, “Okay. If that’s what you want.”
He doesn’t respond right away, but then he flatly states, “It is.”
To keep my chin from quivering, I grit my teeth and slowly nod. If I speak I’ll burst into tears, so I stay silent as I set my napkin on my plate, push back from the table, then walk to the entryway. I hold my shoulders straight and keep my chin held high as I lift my purse from the table in the entry and reach for the doorknob.