After we ordered, Easton and I went to the girls and gave them their beers. “Can we read one?” Nic asked.
I took a big gulp of my beer. It was time to see what was on the folded papers. “Yeah.”
She reached into her purse and pulled out one of the folded pieces of white paper. She handed it to me, and I took a deep breath and then opened it.
Dee Dee,
When I think of you, my heart hurts.
When I think of you, my heart breaks.
When I think of you, my heart bleeds.
You’re all I think about.
All my love,
Avery
I dropped the paper, my eyes going wide.
“What is it?” Nicole asked.
I couldn’t get any words out. It wasn’t the words of the letter that left me speechless, but the name of the person who signed the handwritten note.
Nic grabbed the paper from my hands and gasped. “It’s a—”
“A what?” Brooke reached for it, and she and Easton read it at the same time as Easton leaned over her shoulder.
“Holy shit,” Easton muttered.
“You’re named after someone,” Nic stated, looking over at me with meaningful eyes.
I didn’t respond. Instead, I finished my beer in one gulp then stood and went to the machine to get tokens for an open cage. I wasn’t hungry any longer.
The guys went to the batting cage while Brooke and I continued to read the love letters.
Dee Dee,
When I think of you, I think about the day we met.
When I think of you, I think about the day I fell in love with you.
When I think of you, I think about the day you told me you loved me.
When I think of you, I think about the day you left me.
You’re all I think about.
All my love,
Avery
Dee Dee,
When I think of you, I think of your smile.
When I think of you, I think of your laugh.
When I think of you, I think of your beauty.
You’re all I think about.
All my love,
Avery
Dee Dee,
When I think of you, I think of our nights under the stars.
When I think of you, I think of our nights at the lake.
When I think of you, I think of the night when I told you to leave him.
You’re all I think about.
All my love,
Avery
My heart broke with each note I read. It seemed that Avery’s mom was with another man at some point. But why did she stay with Doug? Was it because of Avery? I’d heard of women wanting to stay with their children’s fathers because they didn’t want a broken home, but wasn’t love better? I mean, who was to say this guy—who Avery was clearly named after—wouldn’t have loved Avery?
“Is this real life?” Brooke asked.
I looked up at her. “What?”
“How could a woman not stay with a man who pours his heart out like this?”
“I don’t know,” I admitted. “None of us know who these people were, and they’re my husband’s parents. It’s crazy.”
Avery was in the cage, letting off steam. He wasn’t smiling like the other day. This time, I knew he was pouring all of his anger and confusion into every swing. Thank god he now had Easton to do manly shit with and let out all of his frustration. I could only do so much.
“Do his parents have a VCR?”
“What?” I asked, looking back at Brooke.
She held up the tape. “Maybe the answers are on this tape.”
I thought for a moment. “I don’t recall even seeing a TV.”
“Really?”
“It’s weird, B. They have this nice house, but it’s stark white with no personal belongings except clothes and medical books.”
“No computer?” I shook my head. “Maybe some answers are on her phone then?”
“Shit. We need to head back to the house and see about cracking their phone passcodes.” I’d forgotten we needed to text people about the viewing.
“How are we going to do that?”
“I have no idea.”
When our tacos were ready, Avery was still in the cage, hitting round after round after round, so I got his to go. The entire drive back to the house, Avery was quiet. We both had a lot of questions with no answers.
“How about you and Easton grab some beers and play bocce ball while Brooke and I try to get into your mom’s phone?” I suggested, thinking he needed more stress relief.
Avery looked over at me as he put the car into park. “No, I can’t let you do that.”
I patted his knee. “I’m your wife. Let me do this for you.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.” We got out of the car. “Plus, Brooke and I are women. We kinda live for this thing.”
“What thing?”
I shut my door. “Finding shit out.”
Avery stared at me for a moment and then glanced at Easton, who was grabbing his and Brooke’s bags out of the trunk of the car. Avery looked back at me. “Okay.”
“Okay?” I asked, making sure I’d heard him correctly as I made my way around the hood of the car.
“Yeah. My heart can’t take all of this anymore. I thought we were coming to California to identify my parents and then bury them. I had no idea they were living some sort of a secret life.”
“Okay. We’ll go to Edna’s and see if she has a VCR. You and E—”
Avery walked to the front door, but then stopped and spun around. “Don’t watch the tape without me.”
“But you just said—”
“I know what I said.” He turned back and slipped the key into the lock, unlocking and opening the door with a groan. “My head’s fucked up. I don’t know what I want.”
I glanced back at our friends real quick and then back at Avery before walking into the house. “Okay. Brooke and I will see if Edna has a VCR, and ask her about the mystery man. But first we’ll try to get into your mom’s phone so we can text people about the viewing.”
“And bring us back In-N-Out?”
I balked. “You’re hungry?”
“No, but we will be,” he clarified.
“You have tacos.” I held up the bag.
He took it from me. “I’ll eat them now, but I’ll still be hungry for In-N-Out in a few hours.”
I smiled and wrapped my arms around his neck. “Fine, we’ll get you your In-N-Out after we find out all the info.”
“Good.”
My lips met his for a quick kiss. “We’ll be back.”
“Where are we going?” Brooke asked as I grabbed her wrist and started to go up the stairs.
“We have a mission.”
“A mission?” Brooke followed as I dropped her wrist.
I went to the end of the hall and grabbed Avery’s mom’s cell phone. “First, we have a phone to crack.”
“And then?”
“Then we’re going across the street to Edna’s because if anyone were to have a VCR, it has to be her.”
“And then?”
I looked up from the phone as it turned on. “And then hopefully we have answers and not more questions.”
Brooke stepped closer and lowered her voice. “I hate to say this, but this is kinda fun. I thought we’d be sitting around crying the whole time.”
“Avery’s only cried once since we’ve been here,” I whispered back.
Her brown eyes widened. “Really?”
“Would you cry if your mother died?”
She blinked and thought for a moment. “Now I would.”
“But before you made amends?”
“I …” Brooke hesitated. “I don’t know.”
“We all grieve in our own way, right?”
“Yeah,” she agreed. “I can tell he’s grieving just from the aggressive swings in the batting cage.”
“I know.” I sighed. “We’ll get through thi
s.”
“Yes, you will.”
I sat on the edge of the bed. “Okay, so if Avery’s birthdate doesn’t work to unlock her phone, I have no idea what to do.”
“I’m sure we can find out on Google how to jailbreak a phone.”
I looked up at her. “Let’s hope this works though.”
“Well, try it.”
After taking a deep breath, I put in Avery’s birthday as the six digit code. It worked. “Oh, thank fuck.”
“Oh good. Now you’re just going to text all of her contacts?”
“Do you have a better idea on how to tell their friends about their viewing?”
“Nope.”
I started to compose a text to the last person she sent one to. It was a woman named Martha.
“Are any of them to Avery Senior?”
My gaze darted up to Brooke. “Shit.”
“What?”
“What if he shows?”
Brooke shrugged. “Then Avery Junior might get some answers.”
“Right.” I sent the text and looked through Denise’s contacts.
“Anything?”
“No, unless she has him as a code name.”
She sat beside me. “Then just send a text to everyone, and if some guy shows up named Avery, we’ll hold him hostage until we get answers.”
We both laughed. “I’m glad you guys came.”
“Me, too.” Brooke smiled.
I sent the text to everyone in Denise’s contacts, excluding Doug. There weren’t that many people, maybe fifteen or twenty. Just as I was about to set the phone down on the nightstand, it occurred to me that there wasn’t an entry for my Avery.
“All right. We have a movie to watch.”
The house was quiet when Brooke and I walked down the stairs. I took that to mean the guys were in the backyard, but we didn’t bother to check. Instead, Brooke followed me out the front door, and we walked across the street. It might be weird to go to a stranger’s house and ask to use their out-of-date VCR, but if Denise trusted Edna enough to be the only one who knew about her will, then we could trust her too. Plus, we had no clue what was even on the tape.
“This is the lady who brought you Avery’s mom’s will?”
“Yep.” I knocked on the door.
Edna answered a few moments later. “Nic—ole,” she stuttered when she saw I was with Brooke and not Avery.
“Hey, Edna. This is my friend Brooke from New York.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” Brooke greeted and stuck out her hand.
“You too, dear,” Edna replied, and they shook hands.
“We just came over to see if you had a VCR,” I explained.
“A VCR?” Edna questioned.
“We found a VHS tape in Denise’s safety deposit box.”
“Oh?”
“Doug and Denise didn’t even have a TV, let alone a VCR,” I went on.
“I think I might have one in the garage, but I have no clue where it would be.”
“Would you mind if we take a look?” I asked.
“No, not at all. Let me open the garage door for you.”
“Thank you.” I smiled.
Brooke and I stepped off the steps and walked over to the two-car garage. A few seconds later the big white door started to roll up.
“Take as long as you two need. Would you like some lemonade?” Edna asked from the door that I assumed led into the house.
“Sure, but just lemonade this time,” I replied. Brooke looked over at me with her eyebrows furrowed. “She put vodka in them last time.”
“Oh.” Brooke chuckled. “Yes, just lemonade. We have to go on a burger run soon.”
“Lemonade it is.” Edna walked back inside, leaving Brooke and me in the garage. There was a Mercedes on one side and boxes upon boxes on the other.
“Shit, we have our work cut out for us,” I indicated.
“You know, when we were flying here this morning, I had no idea I’d be put to work.”
We laughed. “Think of it like a scavenger hunt.”
“It totally is a scavenger hunt.”
At least the boxes were labeled.
Edna came back a few minutes later, gave us each a glass of lemonade and a pair of scissors, and then left us to continue rummaging through the boxes. The more we looked, the more I thought Edna needed to have a garage sale or donate all of this stuff to charity. She had a ton of boxes, and I was starting to worry we wouldn’t find what we were looking for.
“I found one labeled electronics,” Brooke finally stated.
“Oh!” I exclaimed and went to her. “Open it.”
She grabbed the scissors and ran the blade across the tape. I opened the flaps and peered inside. Right on top was a VCR as well as the cords needed to hook it up to a TV. It honestly felt as though we’d found a treasure chest filled with gold.
“Now, let’s get the guys and make them set it up while we do a burger run.”
“Set it up here, right?” Brooke questioned.
“Yep. Easier than bringing a TV across the street,” I joked. Seriously, what did Doug and Denise do at night? They didn’t even have books or an e-reader around.
So fucking weird.
I was nervous.
Fuck, I was so nervous.
Easton and I had set up the VCR Nic and B found in Edna’s garage, and now we were waiting for them to get back with our dinner.
“Here.” Edna put a shot glass in front of my face. “You look like you could use this.”
I smiled up at her from where I sat on her couch. “I do?”
“From the way your leg is bouncing up and down, I’d say you do.”
I reached for the glass with a clear liquid—probably vodka. “Is it that obvious?”
“Yes,” she stated a matter-of-factly. “Would you like one too?” she asked Easton.
He smiled at her. “Sure.”
Edna went into the kitchen and came back with a shot for both Easton and herself.
“Here’s to answers,” I toasted, and we clinked glasses before downing our shots. Yep, it was vodka. “You know, I didn’t take you for a shots kinda gal, Ed.”
She grabbed the shot glasses from us and walked into the kitchen, calling over her shoulder, “When you get to be my age, you just don’t give a fuck anymore.”
We all chuckled. Hearing her drop an F-bomb actually didn’t surprise me because she did seem like the type to not give a fuck. I mean, she was making sure to liquor me up every chance she got. Hell, maybe she was some sort of alcoholic. She didn’t look like one, though, and I knew my fair share from being a bar owner over the years. I wanted to know more about her. She seemed cool and actually, she reminded me of someone, but I couldn’t place her. Edna was the one my mother had trusted with a secret will, and that was maybe why I trusted her too.
“And how old are you?” I asked.
She came back into the living room. “Avery, you never ask a girl that question.”
“Well, you don’t look a day over thirty.” I grinned.
“Does that mean you want to go clubbing with me tonight?” Edna teased.
“Santa Barbara have any good clubbing spots?” I inquired, joking as well.
“I see you get your humor from your mother,” she replied, patting me on the shoulder.
I looked at Easton and then over at Edna. “I do?”
She smiled and sat in her recliner next to the couch. “You do.”
“I don’t really remember her being funny,” I stated.
“What do you remember?” she asked.
I sighed. “Honestly, not a whole lot.”
“That breaks my heart.” Edna leaned forward and touched my knee. “Your mother was an amazing woman.”
“Breaks my heart too,” I admitted.
“If it makes you feel any better, Edna,” Easton said, “Avery’s like a brother to me, and my parents consider him like a son.”
“That does make me feel better,” she replied. “But I wish
you would have had a relationship with Denise.”
“Me, too,” I whispered.
There was a knock at the door. “I’ll get it.” Easton stood, moving to the front door. As soon as the ladies entered, I could instantly smell the burgers and fries coming from the greasy bag. “Still smells the same,” Easton stated.
I grinned. “And tastes the same too.”
“Everyone ready for dinner and a movie?” Nic asked.
I glanced over at Edna to see her smiling. “This makes me happy,” she beamed.
“Yeah?”
“I never had kids.”
“You didn’t want them?” Nic asked.
Edna’s smile slipped slightly. “Just wasn’t in the cards. What about you four?”
“I have a daughter,” Easton replied.
“Oh?”
“From a previous marriage,” he clarified.
“And will you two have any together?” Edna looked between him and Brooke, who was handing him his double cheeseburger and fries.
“Maybe,” Brooke answered. “I’ve had cancer twice, so we’re not sure if it’s in our cards either.”
Edna frowned. “I’m sorry to hear that. Are you …” She trailed off.
Brooke smiled and handed Edna her food. “I get a scan every year to check to see if the tumor has regrown. So far so good.”
“I’ll keep you in my prayers,” Edna stated.
“Thank you,” Brooke replied.
“And you two?” Edna took a sip of her vanilla shake.
I let Nic answer as I unwrapped part of my double-double and took a bite. “We lost our first one,” Nic said solemnly.
Edna gasped. “Oh my. I’m so sorry.”
“It was a miscarriage, and the baby was unplanned,” Nic went on.
I squeezed Nic’s knee, briefly thinking about everything we’d been through. I didn’t know what our cards held either, but I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else.
“You four have been through a lot,” Edna stated.
We all looked at each other and smiled tightly. Life had dealt us a shit load of heartache, but that was what had bonded us and made our friendships and relationships stronger. I just hoped it was all in the past and we could move forward with whatever we wanted to do in life. I wanted Nic pregnant with my baby, and I wanted her to carry it to term. I wanted to be a father and prove to myself that I wasn’t like Douglas Scott.
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