He leaned forward pressing his lips to mine. Every kiss was like the first—the one on the cruise ship that got interrupted by drunks. I’d never get tired of his lips, his tongue, the way he made my heart skip a beat with just a press of his mouth to mine. It also wasn’t bad that we were kissing on the beach while the sun was going down.
“I love you too,” I told him when we pulled apart.
“Now, let’s go see if the pool at the house is heated.”
The pool was heated.
And so was the shower we took after we took our swim.
The next morning, Avery left to meet with the realtor while I continued going through the house. I was still sorting Denise’s closet, making sure to write down everything we were selling, and packing the jewelry we were taking back.
I was on the last drawer in the huge walk-in closet when I pulled too hard on the bottom drawer to open it. The damn thing flew out and landed on my toe, making me squeal. “Fuck!” I shouted and looked down at my big toe. Part of my skin had been scraped off, and the drawer’s contents had fallen out onto the carpeted floor.
At first, I thought it was Doug messing with me from the dead, but as I was putting the now empty drawer back into its slot, I saw that it wasn’t Doug punishing me, but Denise making me find what she wanted me to find just like the safety deposit box key. Putting the drawer to the side, I crouched and pulled the stack of pictures out of its hiding spot. I sat against the drawers and flipped through them, one by one. They were of Avery—not Avery Senior, but my Avery. They ranged from when he was a baby to a picture of us we took on our honeymoon cruise. Tears slid down my face as I realized that she did Facebook stalk her son, and my heart broke again at the realization that she’d wanted to be in his life but couldn’t.
“Nic!” I heard Avery shout, coming up the stairs.
There was no hiding my tears as I called out, “I’m in your mom’s closet.”
“Hey,” he said a few seconds later as he came into the closet. I looked up at him. “Are you crying?” He squatted beside me.
I handed him the stack of photos. “I found these.” He took them and sat next to me, flipping through each one and smiling as he did so.
“You were so cute,” I cooed, looking at one of him with shaggy blond hair peeking out of a baseball cap, and him in a baseball uniform, smiling with a bat in his hand. He couldn’t have been older than ten.
“And I’m not now?” he teased.
“Well, you’re even cuter now.” I kissed his cheek. He flipped through more of the pictures, stopping on one of him and Easton. They were a little older (maybe thirteen or fourteen), laughing on some sofa with video game controllers in their hands. More tears streamed down my face as my heart hurt a little more knowing that even though Doug and Denise kept secrets from my husband, everyone except Doug tried to keep Avery happy.
“Why are you crying?”
I shrugged. “Just sad. Your mom had to hide so much from Doug, and she did want a relationship with you.”
“Yeah,” he agreed with a mournful sigh.
We were silent while he flipped through more pictures.
“Do you think if we have a son, he’ll look like you?” I asked.
Avery looked over at me and lifted a shoulder. “Maybe.”
For the past few months, Avery and I hadn’t used any sort of protection. I was off the pill, and we were leaving it up to chance. So far, fate hadn’t blessed us with another baby, but I knew that if we had a son, he would look like his daddy with blond hair and blue eyes. And he’d be happy.
I’d make sure of it.
Over the next few days, we accomplished everything we set out to do. We had the estate sale and sold everything. Apparently, white furniture was bougie, and the coastal people of Santa Barbara dug it. That was good for us. Now we just needed to sell the house, and our ties with California would be severed.
I wasn’t sure if I wanted that to happen. California was wonderful. Avery had taken me to Ventura where he grew up and given me a tour of all of his old haunts. We went to Malibu and Venice Beach and saw the Hollywood Walk of Fame. While we were in the L.A. area, we went to Doug’s former medical practice and settled everything there. The staff had moved on to employment elsewhere, but the office manager—the one who gave Doug’s will to the attorney—was the last to go. She gave us all of the business information and taxes, and in turn, Avery gave her three months of pay as a severance package.
We found the cemetery in Thousand Oaks where Avery Senior was buried and took an hour to visit him. He was laid to rest next to his parents, and it made me a little sad to think that my Avery didn’t have any blood relatives that we knew of.
“I met an FBI agent in Vegas. Maybe I can get her to find out if you have any family?” I’d suggested as we stared down at the tombstone.
Avery Moore
Taken Too Soon
But Never Forgotten.
The dates of his life were at the bottom. He died at thirty-one. Avery Junior was thirty-three now and had outlived his biological father.
“We don’t need to get the FBI involved,” he’d chuckled.
“Do you want to find your family?”
Avery had thought for a few seconds, still staring at the headstone. “Nope.”
My gaze moved up to look at him. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah,” he’d sighed. “They probably don’t know about me, and I just want to move on. We’ll start our own family and do it right. I’ll be the father Doug never was, and the lover Avery was.”
I’d smiled thinking of the love notes Avery Senior had written to Denise. “You do seem to have the romantic gene from Avery Senior.”
“It all makes sense now.” He’d wrapped an arm around me, and we stayed until our bellies were hungry.
Then we went and got California tacos one last time.
We decided to take Edna to dinner to thank her for everything. We didn’t know when we’d see her again, and we really appreciated everything she did for Denise and us. Denise’s secret will didn’t matter in the end, but no one knew that, and Edna kept Avery’s mom’s secret until it was time. That showed me that Edna was an amazing woman. I just wished we knew more of her story. When we’d asked her on several occasions, she’d smile and tell us it was a story for another time. Avery and I took that to mean she didn’t want to tell us, so we’d change the subject, drink our lemonade, and tell her about us.
“I know we told you this last time,” Avery said as we waited for our food at a local Mexican restaurant, having our last meal in California with Edna. “But if you want to come to NYC, our door is open.”
Edna smiled. “Thank you. I haven’t been to New York in many, many years.”
“Then come,” I suggested.
“I’ll wait until after winter. Cold weather isn’t good for my bones.”
Avery and I nodded. “Just call us when you’re ready, and we’ll get you there,” Avery said.
“You two told me you went on a cruise to the Bahamas for your honeymoon,” Edna asked.
“We did,” I confirmed.
“Since the last month has been stressful for you”—she reached into her handbag sitting next to her in the booth—“I got you two something.”
“You didn’t need to get us anything,” Avery stated.
“I wanted to. I care about you two, and I want you to take a vacation and not be stressed.”
“A vacation?” I questioned.
She handed Avery an envelope. “Go back to the Bahamas and have a second honeymoon. Make a baby. Then when I come to visit, I can spoil it.”
“Edna …” I reached for her frail hand as Avery opened the envelope. I looked over his shoulder to see that it was a print out of what looked like a travel confirmation, and then it made sense.
“You shouldn’t have,” he stated.
She waved him off with her free hand. “I can’t take my money with me when I die.”
“But we don’t need your money,”
Avery admitted. “This is too much.”
“Nonsense. I want to. As you know, I don’t have children, and I’ve taken a liking to the two of you.”
I stood and rushed to where she sat on the opposite side of the booth and engulfed her in a hug. “Thank you, but you really shouldn’t have.”
“You two go, but there’s one catch.”
I pulled my head back. “What’s that?”
Edna smiled and looked between Avery and me as she spoke. “There’s a bar on the island where you’re staying. It’s called Zelly’s, and you two need to have at least one drink there for me.”
“Why’s that?” Avery asked.
Her grin widened as though she was thinking of something good—a memory of something or someone. “Back in my day, there was a man—”
“Edna, you minx, you.” I smirked.
She laughed. “I’ll leave it at that, but just promise you’ll go and then tell me what you think.”
I smiled. “We will. Thank you so much.”
“Yes, thank you,” Avery expressed.
“The pleasure is all mine.”
We stared at the two urns sitting on the kitchen island. One was plain silver, and the other that held my mother’s ashes was silver with some sort of swirly design engraved in it. Besides the jewelry Nicole had kept of my mother’s, these urns were the last things I had of them.
“We can take them back on the plane tomorrow,” Nic stated for the twentieth time.
There was no question I was taking my mother back. The problem was, what did I do with Doug? For the past few days, I’d stopped referring to him as my father. He was the man who kept a roof over my head and gave me money, but he wasn’t my dad.
“I’m not taking Doug,” I clipped.
“What do you want to do with him?”
Burn him, but that was already done. “I don’t know. Just leave him here?” We kept staring at the urns as though they would give us the answers.
“I have an idea,” Nic said.
“What?” I asked.
My wife turned to face me. “What if we spread some of your mom’s ashes at Avery Senior’s gravesite? Then it can be like they’re together.”
My heart smiled. “I’d like that, but what about Doug?”
“I think we should dump him on the side of the road where he died,” Nic stated honestly.
I was silent as I thought about her suggestion. What did Douglas Scott deserve? The answer: Nothing.
“Okay,” I finally agreed and twisted my head to look at her.
“Really?”
I lifted a shoulder. “What else are we going to do with him?”
She thought for a moment. “Okay. Let’s do it.”
We went to the location where the police report said my parents were hit head-on. It was in the foothills on a part of a highway where the three-lane road merged into two. My parents had been driving on the side that had two lanes, and the driver who hit them might have thought one of the lanes was his because it was right before the merge. I’d never know for sure since all of them had died, but that was what the police report said, and the investigation was now closed.
I pulled the rental over onto the shoulder, turned on the hazard lights, and took a deep breath. “Ready?” my wife asked.
“Yep.”
She got out of the car, the silver urn in her hands. After I came around to her side, Nic handed me the container. Doug’s final resting place was perfect because it had nothing except dead weeds and bushes.
“Should I say something?”
“If you want.” She shrugged.
Did I want to say something? There was so much that I’d wanted to say when he was alive. I’d tried. I’d called and called them until I gave up after they didn’t show for my wedding—the wedding my mom did want to attend. That thought alone was enough to fuel my rage for this man—this self-centered asshole.
So I spoke as though he were there. “I’ve learned a lot about you over the last two months. I learned that you cared more about yourself than the love of a mother for her son. I learned that your hatred toward me wasn’t my fault at all. For as long as I can remember, I knew you hated me. I just didn’t know why. Now I do, and while some might think you’re an honorable man to raise a child that wasn’t your own, you’re not. You could have let my mom go, let her be happy, and let her show me that she did care for me. But you didn’t. I didn’t tell your staff, your colleagues, or anyone who came to your viewing who you really were.” I chuckled. “Of course, no one knew about me, but I didn’t explain anything to them. So, you can live in hell knowing you were the devil in disguise.”
I opened the urn. “But I will live my life being the man you never were. I will live my life feeling love, showing love, being loved. I will live my life knowing that I will never be like you.” I turned the container over just as the wind kicked up a little, blowing the scattered ashes farther along the dead roadside—exactly where Douglas Scott deserved to be forever.
Thrown on the side of the road like garbage.
Two Months Later …
The house in Santa Barbara sold. We got enough from the sale to buy a bigger home in New York—a home to start our family. We found a place in Sands Point that was perfect. It had a large backyard, updated kitchen, a two-car garage, and a master closet that was the size of my bedroom at my parents’ house. It was also not too far from Brooke and Easton. We were currently in escrow for the five-bedroom home, but it was closing in the dead of winter, and I wasn’t looking forward to moving in the snow no matter how perfect our new house was.
Before we moved, we took the second honeymoon that Edna gave us. It was already scheduled and paid for, and we weren’t going to let it go to waste. Thinking about the beach, the sun, and the ocean made me miss California. Or, more specifically, In-N-Out and those damn tacos. I couldn’t recreate the tacos, but I’d found a copycat recipe online for an In-N-Out cheeseburger and decided to surprise Avery and Easton. Brooke and Easton were coming over for dinner and had no clue I was about to bring the West Coast to the East Coast.
“Honey! I’m home,” Avery called out as he walked in through the garage.
I was in the kitchen making burger patties. “I hope you’re hungry.”
“Starving,” he admitted and walked up, kissing me on the side of my head.
“Good. You can make yours a double.”
“Think we can talk our friends into helping us pack?” he asked as he grabbed a beer from the fridge.
“Yes.” I laughed. “They’re helping us move anyway.”
“We’re going to have to owe them for the rest of our lives.”
“Maybe we should transfer the flight and hotel for the Bahamas into their names?” I suggested.
“You don’t want to go?” Avery took a pull of his Fat Tire.
“I want to go. I so want to go.”
“Then we’ll think of something. Maybe after we get back, we’ll send them on a second honeymoon.”
I smiled, working some of the beef into a ball. “They’d like that. Plus, by then, Brooke will have had her yearly scan, and when it’s clear, it will be a celebration.”
“Hell yeah.”
There was a quick knock on the front door, and then our friends entered without Cheyenne. “Where’s C.C.?” Avery asked.
“She went to the mall with Courtney and then she’s staying the night,” Easton replied.
“Ah, so you two are making a baby tonight?” Avery wiggled his brows.
I stopped shaping the burgers and turned to look at Brooke and Easton. “Not yet,” Brooke replied. “Almost off the meds though.”
“Are you two?” Easton questioned.
“Maybe.” Avery smirked and looked at me over the mouth of his beer bottle.
“Well, you two better get the burgers on so we can eat and then get to business,” I suggested, handing Avery the plate of burgers.
“I’m glad we’re all so close we can discuss our fucking sex lives,�
� Easton muttered, opening the fridge and pulling out a beer.
“Says the man who just walked into their house and is now going through their fridge,” Brooke teased.
“What?” Easton shrugged. “I knocked.”
Brooke rolled her eyes as Avery and Easton went out into the cold to start the grill. It apparently took two men. “Are you excited for your trip?”
I reached into the fridge, grabbing the cheese, sweet pickle relish, mayo, and ketchup. “So excited.” Brooke took a seat at the island while I also grabbed white vinegar and sugar from the cupboard. “If you and Easton were to go on a second honeymoon, where would you want to go?”
“Probably the Bahamas like you.” Noted. “Let us know what you think of the place where you stay,” Brooke went on.
“For sure.”
“What’s the vinegar for?” she asked as I started to measure out the ingredients.
I grinned. “I looked up how to make In-N-Out’s sauce that they put on their burgers.”
“Really?” Her brown eyes widened.
I lifted a shoulder. “I was craving the burgers, and this was the best I could do, given we’re hundreds of miles from the closest restaurant.”
“They were really good burgers,” Brooke agreed.
“Yep. Don’t tell the guys. I want to see if they say anything.”
She took two of her fingers and twisted them in front of her mouth. “My lips are sealed.”
I mixed the ingredients, stuck the bowl into the fridge, and then put the fries into the oven. “What kind of cheese do you want on your burger?”
“Whatever.” She shrugged.
“Then you get what they put on the In-N-Out burgers.” I opened the package of American cheese and instantly gagged from the smell. My eyes flared, and I looked toward Brooke.
“What?”
“Cheese,” I whispered.
“Yeah?” She raised an eyebrow.
“Cheese,” I said again.
Avery walked in through the back door. “Cheese?” My gaze cut to him because I wasn’t sure if he’d heard my revelation. He scrunched his eyebrows as I stood still. “Nic? Where’s the cheese?” I handed him the slices that were still mostly in their wrappers. “American?” I nodded, my heart going crazy in my chest, my stomach queasy. He shrugged and, without another word, turned and walked back outside where Easton was.
My One Page 16