Raunchy Roommate

by Bethany Morgan

  I could feel tears start to brim in my eyes as the betrayal set in. He promised he wouldn't tell anyone. I trusted him. He told me I did a good job. He told me he wouldn't judge me. Yet here was feeding lies to a whole table full of boys, including the one I kind of had a thing with.

  "That's not true at all!" I screeched, pushing him away from me as I stood up and silenced the hyena-like snickering.

  "So, you didn't have sex with him?" Charles questioned in curiosity. He was the only one who seemed sympathetic.

  I swallowed the lump in my throat. "I-well, no, I- um, we did do it but-"

  Charles shook his head. "This is why I don't date younger girls," He said in disappointment, as if he was hurt by my actions. "I'll see you later."

  He rushed out of the cafeteria, despite my calls after him. I could feel the tears streaming down my face now. Stuart had not only humiliated me, but he also ruined my opportunity of ever having a chance with Charles.

  I turned to Stuart, and gripped onto his milk carton with anger, letting out a blood-curdling scream as I dumped it over his head. A chorus of "ooh's" echoed throughout the cafeteria, and it was obvious that we had an audience now. "You were supposed to be my best friend! You just ruined everything! You are a manipulative liar and the biggest jerk I have ever met in my entire life. I can't believe you would do this to me, Stuart!"

  He wiped some of the spilled milk out of his eyes at stood up, towering over me because of our height difference. Stuart let out a condescending chuckle. "I don't get why you are so surprised, Ann. Charles isn't worth it. And as for me? Well, I've always just wanted to get in your pants."

  Another sob escaped my mouth as I realized how awful of a person he truly was. This was not the Stuart I had grown up with, this was the Stuart that I never wanted to be associated with ever again.

  I let out a deep exhale, stopping myself from crying for just a few seconds. I was fully aware that the entire school was watching our encounter right now, along with probably some confused teachers, but I didn't care. I wound up my arm and punched him square in the jaw, causing Stuart to stumble backwards and grip onto his throbbing face.

  "I hate you," I spat venomously. "Don't you dare talk to me ever again."

  I turned on my heel, dashing away before a teacher could yell at me, and sprinted out of the school exit, without caring at all about the consequences. I let myself cry loudly all the way home until I reached my house that was nearby to the school and I collapsed into my mother's arms, begging her to let me move to America to chase my dreams and get away from the horrible people here. The horrible people who I used to love, the horrible people who I trusted with everything, the horrible people who completely betrayed me and lied to me, the horrible people who I hope I would never have to see again.

  Chapter 11

  Stuart

  My face went pale just with the mere mention of the incident that had completely wrecked our life-long friendship. I knew it was awful of me the second after I opened my mouth at the lunch table, and I regretted that very moment for the rest of my life. But once I started talking I couldn't stop. It was like something had come over me. I felt like I was in no control over my body.

  I lied to Annabel, and to my friends, and it took me a few years to reflect upon how I never wanted to be even slightly dishonest again. I hated myself for ruining our friendship and for hurting her, but I also never found it as big of a deal as Annabel did. I expected for me to come over that night with some of her favorite candy and tell her I was lying and that we could laugh it off together. But she didn't let me inside her house and she also didn't tell me goodbye when she moved to America.

  I was so happy that Annabel agreed to letting me be her first time, not because of the fact that I have fantasized about it for ages, but because I truly didn't want her to do it with someone who didn't love her and care about her. It wasn't awful as I had claimed and I also didn't just want to get in her pants. She was my closest friend in the entire world, the last thing I wanted to do was drive her away from me. But I guess I do deserve it for completely going against my words and embarrassing her in front of Charles.

  Maybe that's why I did that little stunt. Maybe it was all because of Charles. I can't deny the fact that I was jealous of the way she ogled over him like he was some supermodel. I also can't deny the fact that I've always had a teeney-weeney crush on Annabel, which is top secret information that I have never disclosed with anyone. Maybe I was just attempting to get rid of Charles, because a part of me was hoping that after we had finished sharing such an unforgettable night together that Annabel would view me as more than a friend. But she didn't. She just went right back to her stupid crush.

  Maybe another reason why I did it was because I knew we were going to be distanced from each other shortly. I was switching schools and I really didn't want our friendship to dwindle since we wouldn't have classes or teachers to talk about. It would have hurt me too much to have awkwardness eat away our friendship. Maybe I did it to have a reason to split the two of us apart before distance did its job.

  No matter how many theories I have for the reason why I completely broke all of my promises, I still had no clue why I have never apologized. I apologized for spilling water on her, for my behavior when I was drunk, and yet I could never bring myself to say I was sorry for tearing us apart. I was so scared to do so, mainly because I feared just how quickly the cries would escape my mouth. I hated crying, especially in front of a girl who absolutely despises me and can easily use all of my weaknesses against me.

  "Are you going to say something? Anything?" Annabel hissed, glaring at me sternly.

  "No," I replied softly, letting my head hang down and turning my attention onto my fingers.

  Annabel stormed off of the mattress and paced around a bit, as if she was about to explode any second. She always has had problems controlling her anger and I always have found it irritating, but I think most of my annoyance towards Annabel is simply because I am mad at myself for letting her go.

  She ran her hands through her dirty blonde hair, tugging at the ends in utter frustration. "Are you serious? You have nothing to say to me? You don't think I deserve an apology?"

  "You do deserve one, but that doesn't mean you are going to receive one," I mumbled, still never glimpsing away from my hands that seem so incredibly fascinating at this moment.

  Annabel snickered, scoffing in a condescending manner as the words echoed throughout our bedroom. She placed her palms on her hips, making her have a sassy statuesque, as she smacked her gloss covered lips. "Well in that case, you do deserve a friend, but that doesn't mean you are ever going to receive one as good to you as I was."

  "Ann-" I groaned, flopping back on the mattress so my head was pointed towards the ceiling.

  Instantly, she attached her long nails into the collar of my shirt and yanked me up so I was sitting upright and forced to make eye-contact with her. "No, you're going to sit here and freaking listen to me," She growled at me. "Let me make myself clear, Stu, I am never being friends with someone who can't own up to their mistakes. We are all human, we all mess up, but what blows my mind is that you don't have the decency to apologize for what you did to me. Do you even have any idea how badly you hurt me?"

  I shrugged. "I lied to you and I embarrassed you in front of Charles. Bad friends suck. I get it. I've been back-stabbed by people before too, that doesn't mean I move across the country to get away from them."

  Her jaw dropped slightly, and I knew I had taken that too far, but I was sick of Annabel acting like I was an imbecile who had no clue that what I did was wrong. She is not the only one to have a conscious.

  "This isn't about Charles, I don't give a crap about him. Hell, this is barely even about you lying to me anymore. You have completely ruined my confidence. You made me so incredibly insecure about being with someone. You told me I was bad at sex. Do you understand how insecure I was after that to even kiss a guy? Do you understand that I almost turned Benjamin down
simply because I'm terrified that another boy is going to use me for my body again? Do you understand that if I do accept guys on dates it's hard enough for me to allow them to hug me, let alone kiss me? Do you understand how hard it was for me and my costar, Jordan, to become friends while on set because I can't trust any male to not betray me? This is all because of you, Stuart. I had to go to freaking therapy for this," Annabel informed me, shaking her head at me with such disappointment. "And now I'm stuck living with the same person who caused all of this and it's making me want to consult my old therapist again."

  My eyes widened as she completely spilled everything to me. I had no idea any of those repercussions were possible. None of those dilemmas had crossed my mind before. Now the guilt in my chest was multiplying even further.

  I sucked in a deep breath, preparing to shell out a long apology that still wouldn't be a grand enough gesture to make up for everything. I opened my mouth to speak but quickly closed it again as not even a squeak could travel out of my lips as my lungs felt as if they were being constricted while my throat seemed to be closing up. I was beyond speechless.

  "I can't stand living with you any longer. It's just such a painful reminder of everything. I'm going to go stay at Grace's house, hopefully I can persuade Lucy into letting me move out," Anna told me with disappointment etched into her tone. She turned onto her heel to leave but I grasped onto her arm before she could exit the room, clutching onto her thin limb as if my life depended on it.

  A loud exhale pushed its way out of the lips I had previously licked. "I'm sorry," I murmured, finally building up enough courage to speak after I had gulped at a volume loud enough for the two of us to hear.

  She wiggled out of my grasp, narrowing her eyes at me with irritation again. Her pouty lips pursed together as if she was preventing herself from saying anything at all while she formulated a response. "I'm having a really hard time believing that is true," Annabel hissed, taking a few steps back. "Come find me when you learn how to give a real apology."

  "Ann, wait!" I screamed after her, sprinting down the hall to try and make her stay, but she had already disappeared out of our temporary home, and I wasn't sure if she was ever going to come back.

  My brain immediately came up with a plan, and I needed to get started right away.

  Each finger was throbbing in pain after I spent about two hours jotting down my thoughts onto a piece of loose-leaf paper, and compiling together an apology into a letter that I have attached onto Annabel's favorite kind of candy. I almost wrote her a song, but then I realized that I would have been too nervous to perform it and that it was beyond cliché, and I wanted nothing more than to steer clear from those sappy cliché moments.

  I picked up my phone shortly after giving my palm a quick massage and called Clayton, who I really missed a lot along with the other boys that were probably partying it up at our LA house, and was thankful when he answered right away. "Clay, hey, I need your help."

  "Stu, what did you do now?" Clayton groaned, which only added to my terrible mood.

  "Shut up, I didn't do anything. I just need you to take me to Grace's house, it's really important," I pleaded, bouncing on my feet as I waited for his reply.

  "How would I know where Grace lives?"

  I furred my eyebrows together in confusion. I speculated that the two of them had already hung out but I guess Clayton wasn't as smooth with the ladies as I expected him to be. "What? You haven't seen Grace since the premiere?"

  He coughed awkwardly, making me want to chuckle. "No, I haven't. But I have her number. I've just been waiting to call her."

  I grumbled complaints under my breath since this was putting a damper on how this evening was supposed to turn out. "Can you just text her and ask her where she lives please?" I snapped. "You and I are going over there once you get the address so get ready."

  "What? Oh my God, okay," Clayton began to ramble on, obviously panicking that he was going to encounter that brunette that he had a massive crush on.

  It didn't take long for him to retrieve the address, and soon enough Clay had picked me up, letting the GPS direct us right to our house. I gave him a brief explanation about what was going on before we had dived right into our usual dorky conversations that probably didn't make any sense at all to anyone but ourselves, since they mainly just consisted of an excessive amount of inside jokes.

  Clayton's car pulled into Grace's driveway, and I was really glad it wasn't some super intimidating mansion that I would feel funny inviting myself into. It looked charming, but not as charming as myself.

  "You got this, bro," I encouraged, patting Clayton on the back as he unbuckled his seat belt. I follow his lead, ducking my head out of the car, but instead of strolling up to the front door with him, I was crouched down beneath the green bushes so I wasn't in view.

  "Clayton!" Grace greeted excitedly as she opened up the door, pulling him in for a friendly hug. "It's good to see you again. Finally decided to grow some balls and call me, huh?"

  My best friend giggled his typical giggle, with his cheeks instantly heating up into a blush. Such a wuss. "Uh, yeah, sorry that took so long," He stammered, scratching behind his neck. Grace laughed and urged him to come inside but he shot a glance over to me. "Wait, do you mind if Stuart comes in? I had to drive him somewhere but I still really wanted to stop by."

  I stood up, revealing myself to Ann's best friend. Her face altered to an expression of complete uneasiness. "Uh, I don't know if that's the best idea."

  "Please Grace, I really need to talk to her," I begged, not even needing to address Annabel by a name because we both very well knew who I was referring to.

  "Fine," Grace finally agreed, opening her door so that Clayton and I could both emerge into her home. "She's in my guest room, second door on the left. Clayton, can I get you anything to drink?"

  I left the two of them alone and sauntered over to the second bedroom down her narrow hallway. I didn't knock, simply because I didn't want her to not open it if she found out it was me, and I hoped Annabel was in a decent state when I barged in. She was thankfully dressed and a gasp left her mouth as I startled her.

  "Ann," I called, stepping further inside the room. "Can I please talk to you?"

  Chapter 12

  Annabel

  "What are you doing here?" I asked impatiently, not hiding the ice in my tone one bit. His presence annoyed me, simply because it was a reminder of the mess we have both been dragged into. However, I was kind of touched by the fact that he drove all the way over to Grace's.

  Stuart swallowed, making his little Adam's Apple bob up and down on his neck. His upper and bottom jaw were clamped tightly together, making the bone protrude out of the side of his face. "I really would like to apologize, but I can't communicate well because I always say the wrong things or I freeze up, so I wrote everything I want to say down. Can you read this, please?"

  He hand me a tattered piece of paper that had pen marks leaking through onto the other side. With just a short glimpse down at the page I spotted various scribbles and words being crossed out, making it obvious that he had put a lot of effort into this. A part of me, the one that always held grudges, wanted to rip this up into tiny pieces and scatter the remains over a fire. But the majority of my brain was urging me to fulfill my curiosity and scan over his attempt to make things right.

  "Okay," I agreed, taking the letter into my hands and carrying it with me over to the bed in Grace's spare room.

  I propped my back up against the headboard, squishing a pillow in between my spine and the wood to allow myself to get comfortable. Stuart sat cross-legged on the carpeted floors, awkwardly watching me with hopeful eyes and a sense of anxious anticipation. With a heavy sigh I began to read the letter.

  Annabel,

  I'm really fucking sorry. I'm sorry for a lot of things, one of them being how it has taken me a millennium to finally say this. I was always so scared to apologize, and I'm honestly not even sure why, but I have known that you hav
e deserved one since the moment it happened, I was just too much of a pus- I mean, wimp, to tell you.

  I'm sorry for humiliating you in front of Charles and in front of all of those people in the cafeteria. I never meant to cause a scene. Something came over me that day. I think I was either trying to get rid of Charles or that I was trying to make you angry so that when I went to private school the following year we wouldn't have as hard of a time being apart.

  I don't know, Ann, I'm a total idiot. All I know for sure was that everything I said that day was a total lie. I didn't just want to get in your pants. You meant the absolute world to me and I was so lucky to have a friend like you, someone who I could spend hours with without getting bored and someone who I could be my absolute self with. I also didn't mean it when I said you were bad at sex. You were actually really good for your first time. I still remember all of it, and I'm still honored to be your first, even though you probably regret agreeing to it and I don't blame you.

  I'm also really sorry for screwing you up. You shouldn't be so hesitant around guys just because of me. I mean, I understand why you are, cause like I was a major jerk who completely betrayed you and acted like I didn't care about you at all. But not all guys are like me, I'm not even like me anymore. Okay, that probably didn't make sense but I'm trying to say that I've changed and I hope you can realize that, along with how I hope you can realize that if you push boys away because of me, you are going to miss out on chances of falling in love. And you deserve to find that.

  This is probably overwhelming since I'm throwing all of this at you at once, but this apology is long overdue. Something happened at the press conference when I stood up for you, it was like my protective best friend role had snapped back into me. I know you hate living with me, and I get that, but I actually don't mind it. It reminds me so much of our childhood. I have missed you so much, Ann and I will do whatever it takes to get us back to the way things were before.