Raunchy Roommate

by Bethany Morgan

  My jaw dropped at his insensitive words. It was completely unlike Stuart. And I did not like this side of him one bit.

  I picked up a pillow and hugged it against my chest as if it would provide the comfort I wasn't even be able to receive from my own boyfriend. My boyfriend who I wouldn't be able to see for months and who didn't seem to care.

  I pushed myself up off of the couch as the heat became unbearable, and headed towards the back porch to get a breath of fresh air. The air conditioning must be broken or something.

  The waves were continuously crashing against the beach in a languid motion, soothing my brain of its swarming thoughts. I tried to focus on inspecting the way the water absorbed into the sand, making it a darker shade than the dry sand that was closer to the deck, and how it made the little shells appear to glimmer. I just wanted to concentrate on anything other than this current situation.

  I walked closer towards the ocean, finally sitting down on the sand and stretching my legs out so my feet would reach the water. A wave crashed over my feet, which truly helped cool me down. However, mentally, I was still mad, and a tear slowly trickled down my face.

  I wasn't sure if I was mad at Stuart for his comment or if I was mad that I actually wouldn't be able to see his face everyday. I still have not come to terms with that. I don't want to think of how tortuous it's going to be only getting to hear his voice over phone calls and only seeing him through a screen. But I guess that was better nothing, and it's something we're just going to have to get through together.

  Once the tide raised high enough to get my shins wet, I retreated away from the ocean and went back inside, trying to stop the silent tears from falling.

  Stuart was now sitting on the sofa again, this time shirtless and only clad in his patterned boxers. He glimpsed up at me as he lifted the back of his palm to his forehead, wiping off some sweat. "It's hot as balls in there."

  "I know," I stated in an icy tone, giving off a little sniffle.

  Stuart patted the spot next to him and I reluctantly obliged to his request. "Have you been crying?" He interrogated, his eyebrows raised as he scanned my face.

  I just nodded. Stuart wrapped his arms around me, even though it was ridiculously hot in our house, and held me close to his body, rubbing his palms on my back in a circular motion. "I'm sorry, baby. I've just been really stressed about the tour lately."

  "Well I'm stressed too! I have a new movie to shoot and I have to figure out how I'm going to stay sane while you're gone," I explained, tilting my head back so I could see his face. I ran a hand through his hair that was a bit greasy due to the sweat. "Just try not to take the stress out on me, okay? I really don't want to be mad at you when you're away. I love you, Stuart."

  His eyes flickered around my face, his lips remaining tightly pursed together as if he was thinking about something very deeply. He swallowed slowly, making his Adam's apple bob up and down. "I love you too, Annabel. I always will. Remember that," Stuart mumbled, his voice sounding strained.

  I smiled, closing the gap between us by pressing our lips together in a chaste kiss. "Do you want to sleep on the floor tonight?"

  "Yeah," He agreed. "But can we take a shower together first? I smell disgusting."

  "I thought you weren't in the mood," I teased, standing up from the couch with our hands laced together, as we approached the bathroom.

  "I guess I lied," Stuart said, finally breaking a grin as he turned on the water.

  Grace finished eating her last slice of pizza before wiping her mouth from a napkin to get rid of the excess grease that was lingering around the crevice of her lips. She let out a loud burp immediately afterward, making me laugh at her lack of inhibition.

  "This was fun, but I should probably get going. Bradley's coming over after rehearsals because we apparently need to talk," Grace told me, rolling her eyes slightly.

  "Oooh," I said playfully as I folded up the empty cardboard pizza box and brought it over towards the recycling bin.

  She shrugged. "It's whatever. I'll see you at the airport tomorrow, right?"

  "I'll be there," I said with a nod, just as Stuart came through the front door, an exhausted expression covering his face again. He gave a small smile to Grace before ducking into the bedroom, not even muttering a word. She looked at me questioningly. "I don't know. I'll see you later, okay?"

  She sauntered off towards the front door to exit, leaving me alone in the living room. It was late, nearly midnight, and I was thankful that Grace had come over to keep me company today instead of just me sulking around waiting for Stuart like a hopeless housewife.

  "Hey, Stu," I called as I opened up the door to our room. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, staring down at his own hands as if a layer of blood covered his palms. "What's wrong, babe? Long day of rehearsals?"

  "Ann," Stuart responded suddenly, his brown eyes lifting to meet my own. "I think we need to break up."

  My heart stopped. Every ounce of color in my face diminished, leaving me pale and wide-eyed, with my breath getting caught in my throat.

  "We- what?" I clarified through my quivering lips. I was hoping I had just misheard him.

  Stuart shrugged. "Come on, Ann. I'm going on tour and you'll be filming a new movie. We're never going to be able to talk or see each other. Let's just end things on good terms, and then when I get back from tour in like March we can see from there."

  The room felt like it was spinning. I couldn't breathe properly. Tears welled up in my eyes before falling over the brim, constantly streaming over my face. This could not be happening.

  "March? Are you kidding me? I'm not going to be able to talk you to until March? Please tell me this is a joke, Stuart," I wailed, in the midst of my heavy cries.

  He frowned at me, his hands reaching out to touch my shoulders. "No, baby. You can still talk to me whenever. We can still be friends, okay? I just don't think a relationship is the best thing for our careers right now."

  "Bullshit," I spat angrily, with tears continuing to flow down my cheeks. "We love each other. We can make it work. I love you, Stuart. I love you. You can't just dump me. Please don't do this."

  Stuart swallowed, his eyebrows furring together. "Ann," He trembled, his voice coming out in a whisper. "Don't make this harder than it needs to be. We're just going to take a break for a little bit."

  "A little bit? It's almost a year! How am I supposed to be without my best friend for that long? Why aren't you even going to try?" I screamed, although it didn't sound as intimidating when I was sobbing.

  He shuffled his feet. "Look, I've never had a girlfriend on tour before. The guys keep telling me how hard it is and how you just end up hating each other. I don't want to hate you. And I'm not sure if I'm even able to handle this kind of commitment."

  My jaw dropped.

  "Commitment?" I repeated in an incredulous tone. "Are you kidding me? Commitment? So you're breaking up with just because you don't think you're going to be able to keep your dick in your pants?"

  He clenched his jaw together tightly as he shifted his gaze towards the carpet underneath us. "Well, not exactly-"

  I threw my hands up in the air, stomping away from him. "You know what? Fine! If this summer meant absolutely nothing to you and all you care about is getting laid then be my guest. Go get laid, Stuart! Have fun! Just don't come crying to me when you realize none of those girls give a single solitary shit about you!" I screeched in an irrational manner. "God dammit, I'm such an idiot."

  He was following closely behind me as I sat on the couch, picking up that same throw pillow and holding it tightly to my chest. The uncontrollable sobs hit me again, and I started to rock back and forth.

  "I thought I was just going to have to miss see you everyday. Now I'm going to have to miss our whole relationship," I cried, lifting my hand up to my mouth in awe as my voice cracked with every word I spoke.

  Stuart awkwardly sat down on the other cushion, his elbows on his knees as his head hung low to stare at his f
eet. "I'm sorry, Ann. I just thought this would be better for us in the long run."

  I let out another wail, feeling my fingers start to shake as they held tightly onto the scratchy material of the pillow. "But you're my breaking my heart."

  "Baby," He whimpered, scooting closer to me and extending his arms out to try and hold me, but I stood up and withered away from his touch. I wanted him to hold me more than anything, but I was so furious that he was ending things for such stupid reasons.

  "I didn't want to lose you again, Stuart," I mumbled, lifting my palm up to my eyes and rapidly wiping the waterfall of tears. "But that's exactly what's going to happen. Isn't it?"

  Chapter 44

  Stuart

  The splash of cold water on my face instantly woke me up, ridding me of the grogginess from the worst sleep I had ever encountered last night. My muscles were still aching and sore from having to adjust to sleeping on the couch, since Annabel screamed at me for even thinking of sleeping next to her, and my mind was still racing with thoughts.

  I picked up all of my stuff that was in the bathroom and put them in a container to be packed away. I slowly pulled back the shower curtain to get my shampoo and body wash. I was instantly flooded with the memories of two nights ago, when I got to feel every inch of Annabel's skin and got to feel her lips on mine and hear her laughter echo through the small bathroom. It was something I would probably never be able to experience again, and I hated it.

  Honestly, I didn't want to break up with her. I'm in love with her. But the more I thought about it, and the more the guys, who actually had firsthand accounts of failed relationships while on tour, kept telling me about it, the more necessary it felt.

  I don't know, it's kind of like when I was going to a new school and the incident happened. I just didn't want us to stop being close being of losing touch. That would hurt much more because the pain would be everyday and you could physically be able to see your relationship fading away. I just chose the route of ripping it off like a band-aid.

  My feet stepped along the tops of the carpet, admiring the plush quality that I would probably never be able to feel between my toes again. Not only was I going to miss Annabel, but I was going to miss this house. I can't believe I used to hate living here. It's been the best summer of my life. I would never be able to forget this roommate agreement and how it completely changed my life around.

  I quietly opened the bedroom door to grab my suitcase that I had already packed. I glimpsed over to Annabel, who was curled up in the fetal position with her eyes closed tightly, accentuating her eyelashes. She looked peaceful and at ease, which made me breathe out a breath of relief since I had heard crying the entire night before, and that had been the most awful sound to ever endure.

  It was around four in the morning and I needed to be at the airport very soon. Annabel was originally supposed to come with me, but I just don't think I can do that anymore. I don't want to wake her up when she finally got a chance to get some sleep and I don't want to hear her yell at me or hear her cry again; it will only break my heart even more.

  My hand hovered over her head, debating whether or not I should run my fingers through her hair one last time or touch her beautiful face. I wanted to kiss her so bad. I wanted to hold her in my arms and just tell her how much I love and care about her, even if it seems like I don't. But I obviously have not earned that privilege, and I was hoping that I had made the right decision.

  "I'm going to miss you so much, baby girl," I whispered as quietly as possible, biting down on my lip to stop myself from crying. I sighed heavily, picking up the handle of my suitcase and wheeling it away to the front door of the home, exiting it for the last time.

  The suitcase tumbled as I chucked it inside my trunk. I sat down in the driver's seat, slamming the door shut behind me, and sped off towards the airport. Some driver would be picking the car up for me later, but honestly, I didn't even care about leaving it behind. I just cared about leaving Annabel behind, and praying that this little break we were taking would work out in the end.

  I hope she doesn't find someone better. Someone who won't make her cry as hard as I did last night. Someone who will be able to put up with her stubborn personality with patience. Someone who will be so good in the bedroom that makes her questions why she ever let a guy like me ruin her opinion on sex. Someone who will love every part of her mind and the way she is always smiling and has a sassy sense of humor and will never leave her side, because that's what she deserves. She deserves the damn world. But I want to be the only person to give her that, not some stupid guy she doesn't have history with.

  The drive to the airport seemed shorter than usual, and maybe it was just because I wasn't even paying attention to where I was going, I was just thinking of Annabel and how I hope that I didn't screw my chances up of every seeing her again. I hope this wouldn't be a repeat of four years ago.

  A group of fans were lined up outside of the airport and I waved to them, but couldn't bare myself to stop. My eyes were probably all red and puffy and there was no way I'd be able to smile. "I'm sorry, guys. Thank you for coming though," I mumbled, keeping my head low so they wouldn't see that I was on the verge of tears.

  "Stu!" Clayton yelled, waving me over to where the other three were. I strolled over to them, puffing up my chest to seem tougher. "Did you break up with Ann last night?"

  "Yeah."

  He gave me a high five. "Atta boy! I'm going to miss her, but like, now we have the four of us all single and all ready to party and to only have to focus on our music. It's going to be the best tour ever."

  They all cheered, but I stayed silent, my lips barely curving into a smile. Benjamin seemed to notice this, and he placed a hand on my shoulder. "You'll be okay, bud. She loves you. You guys will pick up where you left off right when the tour is over."

  I shrugged. "I don't know, Benjamin. She was really mad last night. And she could not stop crying."

  Benjamin frowned. "Well how did she act this morning?"

  I glanced up at him. "I didn't even talk to her this morning."

  His eyes widened, as if this was the most shocking news he had ever heard. "She was that mad still? Oh my God."

  I furred my eyebrows together in confusion. He must have completely misinterpreted my statement. "No, like, I didn't wake her up because I didn't want to see her mad or sad. I just left."

  Benjamin, and even Bradley, who must have been eavesdropping, let out a loud gasp. They shared a look of disbelief with each other. "Are you kidding me, Stuart?" Benjamin screamed, earning glimpses in our direction from nearby people. "You're such an idiot, you know that? You can't just leave her without saying goodbye! That is so awful."

  "I even said goodbye to Grace this morning and we were just a fling. You actually are like in love with Annabel! You can't just leave!" Bradley scolded, his cheeks growing red with anger.

  Clayton clenched her jaw together tightly. "Stuart, you need to call her right now."

  I shook my head rapidly, feeling the fear build up inside of me as I pictured her waking up without me there. "I- I can't do that. No."

  Benjamin gripped onto both of my shoulders, a stern expression plastered over his face as his blue eyes stared into mine. "If you don't, I will."

  Jealousy swept over me as I remembered their almost relationship. I didn't want him to seem like the good guy. "Fine," I mumbled, taking my phone out of my pocket.

  Since it was on silent because I was driving, I hadn't even felt all of the messages I had gotten. And they were all from Annabel. "Shit, she's already awake," I complained as I unlocked my phone to read them all, making the boys all sigh in disappointment.

  From: mckenzie- stuart where are you

  From: mckenzie- stuart please tell me you didn't leave

  From: mckenzie- no no no this has to be a joke

  From: mckenzie- stuart did you really go to the airport oh my god

  From: mckenzie- i didn't even get to say goodbye to you

 
From: mckenzie- how could you just leave me without saying goodbye

  From: mckenzie- stu this isn't funny i'm not going to see you until next year please turn around and come back i need to see you one more time

  From: mckenzie- stuart thomas robinson

  From: mckenzie- baby :(

  From: mckenzie- please answer me

  I felt my fingers begin to tremble. This was making everything so much harder than I wanted it to be. I pursed my lips together before typing a response.

  To: mckenzie- sorry i just checked my phone i'm sorry for not saying goodbye but i just didn't want to wake you up

  From: mckenzie- are you kidding me i don't care about sleep i care about you

  From: mckenzie- you're such an idiot i wouldn't have cared about you waking me up i just wanted to hug you before you left

  From: mckenzie- do i have time to drive to the airport

  To: mckenzie- no we're about to go security. i'm so sorry ann but we broke up we can't keep pretending everything is going to be the same

  From: mckenzie- i didn't want to break up i love you

  From: mckenzie- i love you so much please just wait for me i'm on my way to the airport i need to see you

  To: mckenzie- i thought you were still mad at me

  From: mckenzie- just because i'm mad at you doesn't mean i don't love you anymore!!! you're such a coward i'm so upset

  "Alright, we need to go," Clayton ordered, nodding his head in the direction of the start of the flying process. "You can keep texting her as we walk."

  "She wants to come here to see me," I murmured, making them all look at me with sympathy.

  "Stu, I'm sorry. We- we just can't do that. We have to be in the UK by today. There's no way we can miss our flight," Clayton said in a firm tone, although his hazel eyes revealed that he felt really bad for saying that.

  To: mckenzie- there's not enough time for you to get here. we have to go. i'm so so so sorry

  From: mckenzie- NO

  From: mckenzie- stuart no

  From: mckenzie- i can't believe this is happening