King of the Dancehall

by Nick Cannon

  I thought about it, piecing together the story Bishop had just told me and trying to understand how it related to me and my current situation. It certainly felt like I was stuck in the middle of a dream—a nightmare, really—that I couldn’t tell the meaning of. I knew one thing for sure. If I was going to get out of the trouble I was in, I would have to do it on my own.

  Outside the window, I could see people beginning to emerge from their homes to start the day. I knew that soon the church would be busy and the bishop would have visitors. I had to get moving before anyone discovered I was there.

  “Bishop, I’m going to leave now.” I looked at him, sadly. I wanted to ask him if he could go and summon Maya. Maybe she and I could steal a few sweet moments and I could tell her that I was sorry. But, I didn’t want to put her in any danger. It felt like there was no place in the world that I belonged. I’d been drifting from one hiding place to the next. I was getting tired of running. But, the last thing I wanted to do was bring trouble to the bishop’s and Maya’s doorsteps.

  “Thank you for everything.” I realized that the man wasn’t so bad after all. All he really wanted was to protect his daughter from any possible heartbreak. I had to respect that. Even if he had given me hell in the process. I wondered what it would have been like to grow up with a father figure like the bishop. Someone to give me structure, boundaries, and sound advice. Maya was blessed. I wondered if she realized that.

  We both stood up. Face-to-face, we shook hands.

  “Please let Maya know that I love her,” I said. I had no idea when I would have a chance to see her again. It was way too dangerous now.

  “I will,” the bishop said. “Be careful, Tarzan.”

  WALK LIKE A MAN

  I rode my bike way up into the mountains where Farmer lived. It was the only place I could think of where Dada and his goons might not look for me. Farmer had gotten most of his operation running after his release from prison. But, he had been keeping a far lower profile in the wake of the raids that dismantled my crew. I was the most sought-after man in Kingston at the moment, and I needed to get somewhere low and discreet with someone I could trust.

  Farmer tucked me deep in the back of his ganja field, where I spent the whole afternoon in a lean-to shack, smoking spliff after spliff. Even in the haze of marijuana, my mind found no peace. I was in a fucked-up situation. My money was gone, I was on the run, and surely there was a price on my head. I was worried about my family. I missed my lady, and each time Maya crossed my mind, I got choked up. It was possible I might never see her again. The thought broke my heart.

  What made it even harder to accept was the fact that all of this was my own fault. I had a woman in my life who carried herself like a queen. Maya was sweet, loyal, and supportive. Everything I ever wanted in a woman. She was the opposite of every loud, ghetto hood rat I ever dated before. And, despite the fact that I had been blessed with a woman like that, I had allowed myself to get distracted by a devilish imposter.

  Kaydeen Davidson. When my thoughts drifted to her, and I imagined her face in my mind, I was filled with a fury that made me tremble. It was hard to imagine that I’d ever been attracted to her. I chastised myself for not seeing her cunning and manipulative ways sooner. She had fooled me into thinking that she was somehow different from her brother. In her eyes, even her cutthroat father was some kind of hero. Now, it was clear to me that she was a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Her stunning physical beauty masked the ugliness of her true character. She was just like the men in her family. Probably even more vicious than they were. I laughed to myself now, realizing she had fooled me into believing that she was any different from the rest of the Davidson family. Like Dada and her father Pierce, Kaydeen was an evil puppet master who used people for her own enjoyment. Growing up, I’d been warned to never trust a big butt and smile. But, I had fallen for that anyway. Now it had cost me everything. I regretted ever giving that woman a moment of my time.

  The situation couldn’t have happened at a worse time. It was the night of the ten-million-dollar dancehall battle. As I looked down at the view of Kingston from Farmer’s mountainside home, I knew I had to go back. There was no way I could let Killa Bean and the crew take that stage without me. Not when my boy had taken such a brutal assault because of me. Not when I had spent so much time perfecting the moves that I knew would win us that prize money. I had to face my problems with faith the way the bishop had described. I wasn’t sure whether or not I would survive the night. There was a very real possibility I could be killed the moment I stepped back into Kingston. But, I had to go back. For my family and the people I loved. This was my chance to use my skills to escape my circumstances the way Joseph had in the Bible story the bishop told me.

  I waited until I knew the dance clash was already in full swing. The Jungle would be packed with people from all over Kingston. This was a major event that had been all over radio and TV commercials for weeks. There would be television cameras, bright lights, and huge crowds. I prayed that those things would keep me from becoming a casualty on a public stage.

  I knew my crew must be wondering where I was. They probably weren’t expecting me to be there tonight. I hadn’t spoken to them, let alone rehearsed with them, in days. I was the front man for our big routine. They couldn’t perform the choreography we’d been practicing for this night without me in my spot at the front of our formation. I knew that the All Star Blazers would be one of the last crews to perform, so I bided my time. There was a lot riding on me tonight. I had to get to The Jungle by any means necessary.

  I set out for Kingston hours after the party got under way. While I rode along the highway, I imagined the scene I would be walking into. Different Jamaican artists and stars were performing in between each dance crew. Beenie Man, Sean Paul, Bounty Killer, Demarco, Bling Dawg, Voice Mail, T.O.K. I knew the crowd would be tremendous. I also knew that Dada would be in the building. Probably seated at his usual table in VIP with his goons around him. No doubt anticipating my arrival.

  I sped along the highway, heading for the clash. The scenery whizzed past me and I felt my cell phone vibrating in my pocket. Toasta and Killa Bean had been calling me nonstop. I didn’t answer, focused on getting to The Jungle. There was no time to talk now.

  The closer I got to The Jungle, the more content I began to feel. I felt lighter than I had in days. My soul was at peace. I was alone on the road. Just me and my bike Dutty riding toward whatever destiny was mine. I began to think about my life so far. About how far I had come in the time since my release from jail. Part of me wondered whether coming to Jamaica had been a mistake. There was no question that my current circumstances were completely fucked up. But in spite of all the mayhem I had caused, there had been some wonderful moments since my arrival here. A mental slide show began to play of all the good times I’d enjoyed since I touched down in Kingston. Time spent loving Maya, laughing with Toasta, getting wisdom from Aunt Cheryl and Uncle Screechie. But it was the time I spent dancing with Killa Bean and the All Star Blazers that really stood out for me.

  In the dance, I had discovered a part of myself that I never knew existed. Until Toasta and Maya introduced me to dancehall culture, I had no way to vent all the frustration, angst, rage, and power I felt inside of me. Dancing used to be a thing I frowned on. I thought it was fruity. But, now I knew that for me it was the highest form of self-expression. It was my therapy. On the dance floor was where I told my story. And tonight, I was anxious to get to The Jungle and let it all out.

  An eerie silence surrounded me on all sides as I sped down the lonely highway toward the dancehall. I sensed that something was about to happen. Something big. It felt like there was a presence on the road with me. Some unexplainable force that was palpable. Without explanation, a feeling of complete peace washed over me. I could sense that tonight everything was going to happen exactly the way it was meant to.

  I saw the blue lights flashing around me suddenly, and my heart raced. I was filled with instant
dread. Then I heard the police sirens, and realized they were coming for me. I sped up, steering my bike like a madman. I was at peace with whatever happened tonight. They could lock me up, deport me, or do whatever they wanted. But, first I was determined to hit that dancehall stage with my crew.

  With my adrenaline racing, I gripped the handle of my motorcycle tightly. There were three police cars chasing me now. I was grateful the highway was clear at this late hour. I hit each turn at maximum speed, praying the whole time that I didn’t spin out. I was getting closer to The Jungle now and more police cars joined the chase. I saw the bright lights of the dancehall in the distance, and I gunned the engine, giving it all I had. The worst thing in the world would be to get this close and not make it. As I sped closer and closer to the dancehall, I could hear my mama’s favorite phrase in my head.

  The devil is a liar!

  I could hear the crowd roaring inside the dancehall as I got closer. I prayed that by this time the All Star Blazers would be onstage. I sped through the parking lot with the police cars right behind me in hot pursuit. I headed for the front entrance on my motorcycle, revving the engine as a warning to anyone in my path. People jumped back out of the way as I raced into The Jungle, bringing my bike to a screeching halt right in the center of the dance floor.

  I jumped off Dutty and got my footing. I looked around and sat that Killa Bean and the guys were in the middle of our second routine. I rushed toward them and joined The All Star Blazers, already in midroutine. The crowd was going off, as I caught step with the guys and nailed the moves. My entrance had been one for the record books. I knew there must be some who wondered whether it was all part of our routine. My eyes swept the crowd. I spotted the Dada Posse there, standing off to the side waiting for their turn. I had no idea that their crew and ours had been locked in a tough competition for quite a while now. The two crews had been battling hard for a minute, getting equal love from the crowd, and the vibe inside of the dancehall was intense. The crowd was still going wild in response to my dramatic entrance. I could see the relief on Killa’s face, and the rest of crew. They were glad I was there—both for the sake of my own safety and for our chances of winning the battle. I caught sight of Dada standing near the railing up in VIP. He looked livid.

  I danced my heart out. With all the energy I could muster, I pushed myself to the limit, each move executed with power and precision. All of my emotion poured forth. Defiance, rage, triumph, strength, cockiness, and swag. We pulled out all of our best moves, while the crowd reacted with cheers and roars. Dada Posse didn’t stand a chance.

  Raddy Rich stepped forward and battled me one on one. He gave it all he had. I watched him, aware that his life depended on winning this clash. If Raddy Rich lost—especially to me, of all people—Dada would surely kill him. I watched him dance, while I backed up slowly until I was at the edge of the stage. Beenie Man stood onstage with his entourage preparing to perform. I locked eyes with him, resisting the urge to bug out a little bit that I was this close to a living legend. He watched me scamper up on the stage, and waved his goons back when they rushed toward me. He looked at me and gave me a head nod of approval. It was all the encouragement I needed.

  I stood on the stage and waited for Raddy Rich to finish his routine. The second he hit his last step, I took a running leap off the stage and grabbed a hold of the lights wired above the crowd. I swung over the heads of the Dada Posse. Tarzan swinging across The Jungle. The volume and energy of the crowd was electric as I swung with all my might, landing right in front of Raddy Rich. I made a funny face, wiped imaginary dirt off my shoulders, and started doing Raddy’s own dance right in front of him. The crowd erupted in chaos.

  Raddy looked at me, stunned. He couldn’t believe that I had taken his own move and flipped it on him. Killa Bean and the rest of the All Star Blazers joined in. Now we were all doing the Raddy Rich. In defeat, Raddy Rich took off his DADA POSSE jacket, tossed it aside, and joined us in the dance. We stepped in perfect synchronicity, with one soul. One rhythm. It was beautiful.

  Complete anarchy erupted in The Jungle. Both crews did the dance together, killing the choreography. The crowd joined in, unified under one common banner for the first time all night. The energy in the room was out of this world, all of us on one accord.

  The emcee took the stage.

  “Kingston, I think we have a winner! The All Star Blazers! Ten-million-dollar dance clash winners!”

  We all started cheering, jumping up and down, ecstatic. Toasta, Killa, and the crew all hugged each other and clapped hands. Beenie Man took to the stage, performing to a crowd that seemed ready to explode. Maya fought her way through the dense mob, and rushed to my side. She threw her arms around me so tightly that I nearly lost my balance. I could sense that she was happy I had won, but she was even more relieved to see me alive.

  “Baby, you did it! You won!” Maya could barely believe it. Same here. She jumped into my arms, and I kissed her with all my might.

  Toasta interrupted.

  “Hate to be di one to end another Hallmark moment, brethren. But, we gotta roll.” He gestured toward Casanova, standing near the entrance with his guards doing their best to keep the police at bay. I was grateful for Casanova putting it all on the line for my sake. I knew that he could only stall for so long. I had to get moving.

  Maya clung to me, tightly. “Baby, wait.” Her voice was filled with desperation. “I’m going with you.”

  I shook my head defiantly. “No. You’re not!” I meant that shit. There was no way I was putting Maya in any more danger because of my own bad choices.

  “We should go out the back way,” Toasta said. “The front is all lit up with police lights.” He started to lead the way toward the back of the club.

  I stopped him. “No, bro. I got this. You stay.” The last thing I was gonna do was put another one of my family members’ lives on the line. This was my beef. My war. Not Toasta’s. “Collect the prize money,” I said. “Make sure you get that. I’m gonna sneak out the back alone. Don’t worry. I’m good.”

  Toasta hesitated. He looked at me and narrowed his eyes, suspiciously. “You sure?”

  I nodded. “Go get that ten million dollars. I’m gonna go underground. Lay low for a while. I’ll get in touch with you in a couple of days when things die down.”

  “But, that’s your money,” Toasta said. “You’re gonna need it. Can’t make no moves empty-handed.”

  “That’s our money,” I corrected him. “We already discussed the plan. Nothing has changed. Give the guys their cut. And take my part and put that into your music. That’s the wisest investment I can make right now. I believe in you. All Star Blazers, fam. We in this together.”

  He hugged me. I leaned in and whispered to him, “Make sure you take care of my mama.”

  He looked at me, a slight frown on his face. I could sense that he wanted to protest. But, time was running out and we both knew I had to get up out of there. Finally, he nodded.

  “You’ll take care of her yourself. When you get back.”

  I shook his hand hard. I hoped that was how this all played out.

  “Respect, Tarzan. Bless up.”

  I turned to face Maya. She was fighting back tears. One fell, and I wiped it away.

  “Don’t do that,” I said. “I’m coming back.” I kissed her again. “I’m so sorry for everything, Maya. I’m a fool and I made a whole bunch of stupid mistakes. But, I didn’t rape nobody. You gotta believe that.”

  She nodded. “I know you, Tarzan. You wouldn’t do anything that savage.”

  I looked at her, so much regret in my heart. She did know me. Better than anybody. And I believed that I really knew her, too. No matter what secrets she might have kept from me. I knew her heart.

  “I love you, Maya.”

  She forced a smile. “I love you, too.”

  I fought my way through the pressing crowd and ran toward the back exit. One of Casanova’s guards cleared a path, leading me out a door tha
t led to an alleyway on the far side of the lot. Once the night air filled my lungs, I took off. I was running at first, as fast as I could. I was desperate to put as much distance between me and the cops as possible. I wasn’t sure how I would get out of town now that my bike was parked in the center of The Jungle, right in the middle of all the police activity. I slowed to a walk, as I thought about my next move.

  I heard the faint sound of footsteps behind me, and an incredible wave of dread washed over me. The night seemed to grow even darker, and the hairs on the back of my neck stood at attention. I could sense the presence of a dark and looming spirit surrounding me. This was the exact opposite of the feeling of calm I had experienced earlier on the roadway. This energy was evil.

  Sure enough, Dada’s voice pierced the silent darkness.

  “Turn around,” he called out to me.

  I kept walking. I thought about my mama’s prayers. The ones she often uttered as I went out into the mean streets of Brooklyn.

  Lord, please protect him from dangers seen and unseen.

  I began to say that one silently as I walked.

  “Mi say turn around, Yankee boy!”

  I kept walking, unfazed. If this was it, I was ready. Fuck it. I was tired of running. From the police and the gangs back in Brooklyn, from the cops here in Kingston, and from this bitch ass nigga Dada standing behind me demanding me to obey him. Fuck that. My name was Tarzan. I was a king. Not nobody’s boy.

  I felt the impact of the bullet before I heard the first shot. I was jolted by the pain as it tore through my body. But, there was no time to react before the next one hit me, followed by several more. As each bullet made impact with my body, I forced myself to keep walking. Blood began to ooze forth from me, leaking all over the pavement. My ears were ringing, and I felt a cold sweat washing over me from head to toe.