Bundle of Joy?

by Ariella Papa

  “I’m sorry,” Rob and the co-op attorney said repeatedly.

  I guessed it was time for me to leave. Rob explained that there had been a lien placed on the sellers that wasn’t cleared. It was due to a home equity loan. He called it a UCC-1, which was different from a UCC-3 in a way I couldn’t understand, except to know that I had been knocked out.

  It didn’t matter how much my hand ached or my tongue hurt, I didn’t have the key.

  I called Paul as soon as I got out of there. It was after six-thirty. He answered his cell phone right away.

  “Hey, I expected you an hour ago. How did it go?”

  “It didn’t.” I felt like I had wasted so much time. “I sat there waiting for two hours and then started signing things and then it got adjourned because somebody didn’t check some dumb file.”

  “Well, are you okay?”

  “No, not really.” I felt like I wanted to walk away from the whole thing, but I wasn’t sure I could tell him that. “Do you want to get that drink? I think I really need it.”

  “Um.” He sounded like he was hesitating. He had insisted that we hang out tonight and celebrate. “Sure, how about Tier Na Nog.”

  “You really want to go there?” I liked that bar, but I thought we would go somewhere a little more special.

  “Yeah,” he said.

  “Well, I guess I’ll stop at home first.”

  “No,” he said loudly. Then he calmed down. “I’m really close to there. Let’s just meet there. I have a feeling I’m going to be called in to work.”

  “I thought you took off.”

  “Yeah, but you never know.”

  I was looking forward to just chilling out tonight; having some drinks, maybe a little dinner. I wouldn’t have minded a full body massage.

  “Okay. I’ll go right there.”

  Paul was waiting for me at the bar when I got there. He handed me a Bloody Mary and kissed my cheek. On the subway, I had been a bit annoyed with him for picking this place and perhaps having to work. When I saw him, I realized that I was really feeling defeated about the whole day.

  “Hey,” I said, as he pulled me into a big hug.

  We got a table by the window and I told him the whole story, what I understood of it. I appreciated that he had never again brought up his original offer of moving to Brooklyn.

  “The worst part is, I’m jeopardizing my interest rate. It was only locked in for sixty days and then they charge you. My lawyer said the sellers would have to pay if the mortgage broker agrees to extend it, but what if she doesn’t?”

  I felt like I was talking about things I didn’t understand.

  “I’m sure she will, if the lawyer thinks she will.” He was talking to me, but once again, he was distracted.

  “I’m starved,” I said. “Do you want to get a burger or something?”

  “No, I’m not too hungry.” He was unusually matter-of-fact.

  “Okay,” I said. Did that mean I couldn’t order anything?

  Paul’s phone beeped. He looked at it and immediately started text messaging.

  My mood soured again.

  When he finally looked up from his cell phone, I was done with my drink. He started to say something, but then his cell phone beeped again. He looked down at it and then said, “You don’t want another drink, do you?”

  “I kind of did,” I said.

  “Well.” He glanced around. “Let’s go somewhere else. Actually, do you mind if we stop at your place? I want to change my shirt. I’m feeling a little sweaty and I know I left a couple of T-shirts at your place.”

  “Fine,” I said.

  Not only was my boyfriend not being particularly considerate after my day, he was also telling me far too much about his physical hygiene. Maybe this was what Jamie meant about the honeymoon period ending.

  We walked back to my apartment. He took my hand and I held it limply. He didn’t seem to notice that I wasn’t my usual self. What was going on between us? We walked up the stairs. He was doing this annoying tapping against the banisters. Normally, I wouldn’t have noticed or cared about this. But after the adjourned closing, it got on my last nerve. He continued his drumming once we were on my floor. I shot him a look and he smiled. I opened the door and—

  “Surprise!”

  I almost jumped out of my skin. Crowded in my living room were not just Kelly and Armando with their significant others, but a few of my neighbors, Helen and her family, Diane, Joey, Georgia and Victor. Even Andrew Libman, the editor from Financial Woman, was there. For the first time ever he was dressed down in jeans. He looked younger than I had thought he was.

  “What the hell is this?” I asked the group.

  “Is a party,” Armando said. He came over and kissed both my cheeks.

  “We wanted to have a going-away party and celebrate your closing,” Kelly said, giving me a hug.

  “Well, that’s so nice,” I said. Never mind that I hadn’t actually closed. No one had ever had a surprise party or really any party for me. My parents never sent cupcakes to my grade school on my birthday. The closest I had come was the monthly Krispy Kreme celebration we used to have when I worked at the nonprofit.

  “You should have seen her face,” Paul told the group. “She was getting so annoyed with me, I thought she was going to clock me.”

  “I almost did,” I said, laughing. “I couldn’t believe how insensitive you were being.” I looked at everyone. “My closing was adjourned. It’s not going to be for another couple of weeks.”

  “Well, we’re still celebrating,” Diane said. “Right?”

  “Absolutely,” I said, picking Joey up. Kelly turned the music up and I danced Joey over to where Helen was holding my niece, Cristina. I kissed them both and then Andre and Spiro. I gestured to Joey and Cristina who were close in age. “Did they meet?”

  “Yeah,” Helen said. “We had a hell of a time getting them quiet before you walked in. Jamie and Raj are on their way, I hear.”

  “Cool.”

  I made the rounds, to everyone. Then the bell rang and it was Jamie and Ananda. I ran over to give them a hug.

  “Where’s Raj?”

  “He’s bringing everything in from the cab.”

  “Everything?”

  Before she could answer, I saw Raj making the first of several trips with his hands full. He gave me a quick kiss and told me he would be back. Four trips up and down the stairs later, he was ready for a drink. Paul helped him move all the stuff into my room.

  It appeared that Raj and Jamie had brought the whole nursery. There was the portable playpen, the car seat, a small changing sheet, a booster seat, multiple diaper and toy bags, and even a tub “in case we think we can get her to bed.” Wow!

  Immediately food started emerging from the kitchen: bread-sticks wrapped in prosciutto, bruschetta, scallops in bacon, shrimp and polenta topped with blue cheese. When I went into my kitchen for another beer, I found Armando directing two of the restaurant staff. They were cutting up thin-crust pizzas.

  “Armando, thank you. I can’t believe this.”

  “I miss you very much,” he said. “You been a very good roommate.”

  “So have you.” I gave him another hug. I knew that part of him was still upset about the fire. “You have been the best roommate.”

  “We still see each other, after?” he asked.

  “Of course, Armando,” I said. I was still holding on to his arms. “We’re friends.”

  Jamie came into the kitchen, looking to refrigerate some bottles of breast milk. I told her and Armando about the adjourned closing. I suggested to Armando that I could move into my office if my closing wasn’t rescheduled in time for his friend to move in. He said that if necessary he could have his friend stay in his room. But he had been so accommodating of my schedule that I didn’t want to put him out. Then Jamie had her brilliant idea.

  “I have to go back to work on the fourteenth. The nanny that I really wanted can’t start until two weeks later. I was going
to have my mother come, but she’s been having some bad migraines lately. Maybe you could move in instead, and stay with Ananda for the week.”

  Now if I was going to move in with anyone for any length of time, I would prefer to be with Paul and not with a crying baby, but I was so happy about everyone just coming out and celebrating me that I think I would have agreed to anything.

  “Yeah, that might work out well. Depending on when they get my closing scheduled for. It might just be for a week.”

  “That would be perfect.”

  She was so relieved. It was almost worth it. It might be easier for everyone.

  My party went on into the evening. We ate well and even danced. I couldn’t believe my social circle was this big. Sure, people like to party, but the nice thing is that they had come out for me. I hadn’t thought I liked being the center of attention. But then I realized that I had never had the opportunity before. I was kind of enjoying it, at least for one night.

  Before Helen left, I gave her the piece I had written about Cristina. All the Peroni I had drunk gave me some bizarre courage. I didn’t plan to publish it anywhere, so it might never get edited, but I wanted Helen’s take on it. I thought maybe we could talk more about Cristina, about our lives, about everything.

  “Read it when you get a chance,” I whispered as I hugged her goodbye. She was holding her exhausted daughter in her arms. “It’s about Cristina.”

  “I’ll read it tonight,” she said. Then she smiled at me.

  I kissed her again. “I’m glad you came back into my life,” I said. And I meant it.

  When all the guests were gone and Paul had helped Raj and Jamie get all their equipment out of the apartment, Kelly and Armando insisted that I couldn’t clean up. I agreed, but asked that we all have one more drink.

  “I’m going to put Joey to bed in your room, Voula. He’s got his sleeping bag,” Paul said. Joey was exhausted from chasing my niece around all night.

  “Okay,” I said. I watched him gather Joey in his arms. I called out to him. “Hey, thanks for tonight. I know I wasn’t in the best mood.”

  “You’re worth it,” he said. He looked at Kelly and Armando. “I’m probably going to turn in, so enjoy yourselves.”

  My roommates and I smiled at each other. It wasn’t going to be my last time in the house or anything, but the night felt special and we stayed awake, chatting until the sun came up. I was sad that I wouldn’t be living with them anymore, that that chapter of my life was almost over, but I believed that we could still be in each other’s lives even if we didn’t share the same address. The things we now shared were stronger.

  25

  I thought I was going to get out of moving in with Jamie and family when my closing was scheduled for June fifteenth, but then it got rescheduled again. The sellers with whom I communicated via e-mail and whom I had really come to hate had considered getting new counsel, but in the end they stuck with the original, which my lawyer felt was the right thing to do to expedite things. At that point expedite was a foreign term to me, and because of all the confusion, the closing got rescheduled to Friday, June twenty-fifth. I hired the movers for the next day, which happened to be a Saturday. I was getting into that place if it killed me.

  So I wound up in Jamie’s place for ten days. I had my laptop and a backpack full of clothes, a pair of sandals and a pair of sneakers. The rest of my stuff had been moved to Paul’s. The movers would be picking it up (again) from there.

  Jamie and Raj hadn’t really had a chance to clean up the room I was supposed to be staying in. It was the nursery, but for the duration of my stay they were going to put the crib back in their room. I had read up on this in my baby book and it seemed like it might be creating a setback, but I sensed Jamie was feeling guilty about returning to work and this was a way to stay close to Ananda.

  I spent my first evening wading through baby paraphernalia and making dumb faces at Ananda while Jamie complained that none of her old work clothes looked right and the new ones she had bought weren’t her style.

  “You know, it’s going to be fine,” I said. I was beginning to think Jamie was regretting asking me to baby-sit for Ananda. She asked me a million times if I was “into it.” She went over the schedule of what to do three times verbally and then gave me a typed sheet. There were Post-its containing emergency numbers all over the house.

  “I just wish we had time to get you CPR training.”

  I was worried about that too, but I never would have thought about it if Jamie and Raj hadn’t harped on it relentlessly. Raj had calmed down a little bit, but I noticed he watched to see if I washed my hands before handling the child.

  The morning of Jamie’s first day back to work, she fought off tears. Ananda was quite content with her bottle of breast milk. I knew that in spite of herself Jamie wished that Ananda would make a bigger scene.

  Raj had already left to start pre-production on a new show, The Next Mr. Right…Now. Unfortunately, the jury was still out on whether Warren Tucker was the Original Mr. Right, but the first few episodes had been so highly rated that the network ordered another batch.

  “Now, are you sure I should do this?” Jamie asked as she stood by the door.

  “Are you?”

  “No.”

  “Well, you better get sure, because you’re going to be late.”

  “I know,” she said, looking panicked. “I know.”

  “Don’t worry,” I said. “We’ll be fine. And if not, you’ll catch it on the nanny cam.”

  Jamie didn’t really find that funny. She left, after reminding me several times to call her if I needed anything.

  The first few hours went fine. Jamie called four times before noon, but I tried to indulge her. Later in the day, Ananda got fussy. She didn’t want her bottle, no matter how much she opened her mouth. She didn’t want to nap, no matter how much she rubbed her eyes. She spit out her pacifier. There was nothing in her diaper, for once. I wasn’t sure it was normal, but suddenly Jamie wasn’t calling. I didn’t really want to disturb her during her first day back. Ananda’s fussiness turned to crankiness and the next thing I knew I had a screaming child on my hands.

  I was going to kill the baby. I didn’t think I was going to murder her, but the thought did occur to me that she might die in my care.

  When she had been crying for almost an hour, the phone rang. I hesitated before picking it up. I didn’t want Jamie to be alarmed by the wails coming out of her daughter. I could let the machine get it and say I had been at the park later. Maybe they did have a nanny cam and that’s why she was calling. The caller ID box was in the other room, miles away.

  “Hello,” I answered. I must admit that my hand was lightly over the child’s mouth.

  “Are you having a Three Men and a Baby moment?” Paul asked.

  “She won’t stop crying. Where are you?”

  “I’m at the station, but I can stop by.”

  God bless that man. He was always saving me.

  Paul got to Jamie’s apartment within twenty minutes. Ananda had just cried herself to sleep. She stirred a bit when she heard the bell, but remained sleeping. I was still holding her rigidly in my arms, afraid to change position, when Paul got to the door.

  “This doesn’t seem so bad,” he said. “Why don’t you put her down.”

  “I can’t. I don’t want to move.”

  “Voula, you can’t hold her forever.”

  “You’re wrong about that, Torrisi. I will hold her for as long as it takes to never hear that crying again.”

  He clucked his tongue and took her gently out of my arms.

  I had held her stiffly, but Paul folded her into his arms. He whispered soothingly and brought her into Jamie and Raj’s room.

  “That’s it, there you go. Work with me here, kid,” I heard him whispering through the baby monitor. “We’ve got to get Auntie Voula to love kids.”

  I was laughing when he came back in. “Is she down?”

  “Yes.”
r />   “Do you think it’s safe? I mean, you think we can just leave her in there?”

  Paul shook his head. “New mothers. You have the monitor.”

  “Okay.”

  “Have you done any writing today?”

  “Is that a serious question?”

  He smirked at me.

  “It’s only for a few days. I’ll get the swing of it tomorrow.”

  The phone rang. I lunged for it so it wouldn’t wake Ananda. “Hello.”

  “Voula, you sound so panicked. Is everything okay?” Jamie asked, sounding a little panicked herself.

  “Yes, I just wanted to get to the phone before she woke up.”

  “She’s sleeping?” Jamie sounded really surprised, and for a minute I thought I had done something wrong.

  “Yes. And Paul’s here.”

  “Paul? Is everything okay?”

  “Yes, he just came for a visit.”

  “You are watching her, right?”

  “No, we’ve been having sex with wild abandon. You’ll catch it on the nanny cam.” She didn’t say anything and I saw Paul shaking his head. “Of course I’m kidding. He just got here. No worries.”

  “Did she eat?”

  “I followed the schedule. She only ate twice, though.”

  “Okay, that’s fine. I’ll be leaving here at six. I’d hoped to get out earlier. Will you be okay?”

  “Yes, stay as late as you want. I’ve totally got the hang of it.” I winked at Paul.

  “Okay, thanks for doing this, Voula, I really appreciate it.”

  I believed that.

  When I hung up the phone, Paul was smiling. I knew that look all too well.

  “How long will she be down?”

  “Paul, I’m supposed to be watching her. Your intentions don’t seem responsible.”

  “I just wanted to help you relax.”

  I glanced at the clock. She should sleep for at least another forty-five minutes, but more likely an hour according to my explicit schedule. If we stayed in the living room we weren’t doing anything wrong, were we? I turned the baby monitor volume way up.

  “Okay, let’s just be quick about it.”