All That Falls

by Kimberly Frost

  Ox went to the elevator, and Merrick stopped at a door with a security keypad. He punched in a very long code, and the pad’s light changed from red to green. Merrick opened the door.

  Inside the apartment, black-and-white furniture with silver and slate blue accents dominated the room. Highly polished metal end tables had an Art Deco flair. Her gaze paused on a small bronze statue of a half-naked female huntress that was beautiful and erotic. It suited Merrick, but how did Alissa feel about her bold new surroundings? Cerise glanced at the other muse, who moved smoothly into the room, apparently at home in Merrick’s place.

  Merrick cast the cable into the corner and walked to the bar. He moved like the world-class athletes Cerise inspired, not a motion wasted. He made himself a Scotch Lime and then mixed a yellow cocktail that he strained into a glass.

  “Cerise, what’s your poison?”

  “I don’t drink much.”

  “If you did, what would you have?”

  “Something where Triple Sec was the main attraction.”

  “Right,” he said, and then added in a murmur, “Working on the perfect storm.”

  Cerise gave Alissa a questioning look.

  “Triple sec, that’s orange-flavored?” Alissa asked Merrick’s back.

  “That is orange-flavored,” Merrick confirmed without turning around.

  Alissa nodded silently.

  “Want to fill me in?” Cerise asked.

  “Lysander loves oranges,” Alissa said.

  Cerise shrugged. “So do a lot of people.”

  Merrick mixed several liquors and added fresh-squeezed juice from small sweet oranges that Cerise could’ve eaten by the dozen. Once in the shaker, he gave them a good shake and strained the contents over ice.

  He walked over and handed Alissa and Cerise their cocktails. By color, Alissa’s was sunshine and Cerise’s sunset.

  “Damn,” Cerise said after the first delicious swallow. It was intensely orange with a hint of something nutty underneath. “If I ever take up serious drinking, you’re my bartender.”

  Merrick inclined his head, then returned to the bar. He drank his Scotch and poured himself another.

  “Is Cerise’s an Orange Scorpion?” Alissa asked.

  “Yeah,” Merrick said, squeezing lime into his glass and then downing the drink. He returned to them, stopping in front of Alissa. “How about something for luck?”

  The smile Alissa gave Merrick was sweet enough to rival the orange juice in Cerise’s glass. Alissa tipped her head up and kissed him, then laid a palm against his cheek, rubbing the five o’clock shadow in a gesture that was flirtatious and affectionate.

  “Don’t stay gone long,” she whispered.

  He pressed another kiss on Alissa’s mouth. “Not possible.”

  As he turned toward the door, Cerise caught his eye. Without breaking stride, he winked at her, and then slipped out.

  “How long have you been in love with him?”

  “Five years,” Alissa said with a slow smile. “But I only realized it about two months ago.”

  “Were you dating him in secret for all that time?” Cerise asked, shocked. Sneaking off to meet a ventala was a major security breach. How had Alissa managed it?

  Alissa shook her head, sinking onto a couch and waving for Cerise to join her. Cerise hesitated, studying Alissa over the rim of her cocktail glass. She and Alissa hadn’t been close for a very long time. As children they’d been best friends, but the relationship had been strained because Alissa, always so beautiful, had been everyone’s favorite—even Cerise’s own father’s.

  Cerise hadn’t been a pretty child, but she’d been a talented dancer and natural athlete. When the lead in a dance recital had been given to Alissa when Cerise had clearly earned the role, Cerise had asked Alissa to turn it down. Unable to defy the adults who controlled their every move, Alissa hadn’t. From then on, Cerise had frozen Alissa out of her life.

  As they grew up, Alissa continued to have things come easily to her, but Cerise stopped resenting it. Alissa was kind to everyone. She never flaunted her beauty or tried to use it to get ahead. Alissa had worked tirelessly to become a great muse, and she’d earned Cerise’s respect.

  For her part, Cerise had developed her own talents, grown into her looks, and amassed a legion of fans. She was confident and comfortable with who she’d become. She didn’t really need to rekindle a long-buried friendship with Alissa, but Alissa’s recent departure from the Etherlin had shocked everyone, and Alissa interested Cerise. Breaking an incarcerated ventala killer out of a cell and eloping with him…Alissa was the last person Cerise would’ve imagined doing such a thing. Cerise admired Alissa’s rebellion. It was long overdue. Alissa the child hadn’t been able to stand up to the Etherlin Council over a dance recital. But Alissa the woman had walked away from the only home she’d ever known and turned her back on the security of the Etherlin to live in a raging urban area with the violent vampire half-breed she’d married. It would’ve been almost impossible to believe…if Cerise hadn’t seen Merrick and Alissa together.

  With a couple of swallows, warmth spread through Cerise, easing the edge off her nerves. She sat sideways on the couch so she faced Alissa.

  “Tell me what happened the night you left the Etherlin.”

  Alissa rubbed her eyes. “That was a long night,” she murmured, taking a slow sip of her drink. After a soft sigh, Alissa let the story pour out like water through a broken dam. Cerise felt the truth of the account and raised her brows when Alissa described stealing the Wreath from its case and locking Troy and Dorie in an interrogation room to keep them out of her way.

  “Merrick’s life was at stake. I don’t regret anything I did that night.” Alissa squinted as she reached for her glass and her hand slid by it, jostling the liquid. Alissa’s fingers caught the glass on the second attempt and brought it to her lips. She finished the story quickly, and Cerise realized how terrifying that night must have been for Alissa.

  “Listen, I need to warn you about something. Don’t trust Troy with Dorie.”

  Cerise’s brows rose.

  The Xenakis and Rella families were close. Though Ileana and Troy were almost a decade older than Cerise, they had always taken an interest in Cerise and Dorie and supported their growth as muses. At the moment, in addition to being an Etherlin Council member and the Etherlin’s publicist, Troy was also the publicist for the Molly Times and some of Cerise’s other bands. When she was younger, Cerise had had a crush on Troy, the then Versace model, but for years Cerise had considered him more of an older brother or cousin.

  “Alissa, what are you saying?”

  “Troy likes young girls. He likes their looks and likes the control he can have over them. Young girls are less sure of themselves and he exploits that. Maybe Dorie won’t be easy for him to manipulate, but I wouldn’t take the chance.”

  “What did he do to you?” Cerise asked quietly.

  “It doesn’t matter. I’m not interested in dredging up the past. I just noticed that he spends a lot of time with Dorie. She’s what? Half his age?”

  “If he raped you, you should’ve told my dad. Dimitri would’ve kicked him off the council and seen him brought up on charges.”

  “Let’s not use the word rape. I was young and naïve. He manipulated and used me, but it wasn’t some violent assault. The real damage was in the way he treated me. He betrayed me and tried to break my spirit.”

  Cerise winced. “You never said anything.”

  “At the time, I felt like it was partly my fault for being pretty, for being such a temptation. Troy’s very good at spinning things. It’s why he’s a great publicist.”

  Cerise frowned. Was it true? Troy could be a flirt, but she’d never seen him do anything sleazy or inappropriate. Cerise did remember Troy spending a lot of time with Alissa when Cerise and Alissa were in their midteens. And she remembered Troy later bad-mouthing Alissa. At the time, Cerise had been glad that Troy had lost interest in Alissa. It hadn’t oc
curred to Cerise that Troy might have preyed upon her.

  “You should have told my dad. He would’ve been furious. He would’ve believed you.”

  “I didn’t need to tell anyone. I dealt with Troy myself. I used my magic and almost killed him.”

  Cerise’s mouth gaped open. “You did?”

  “Oh yes.”

  Cerise felt like she’d just been told that the Easter Bunny was really the Grim Reaper in disguise.

  “I only bring it up now because I’ve noticed Dorie’s spending a lot of time with him. I just wanted to warn you.”

  Cerise nodded.

  “It probably won’t come up, but do me a favor and don’t mention Troy around Merrick. Merrick has an idea of what Troy did and—well…”

  “Merrick might try to kill him?”

  “He’ll do more than try.”

  “Have you told Merrick not to hurt Troy?”

  “I told him I already avenged myself, and I don’t need or want anything more done to Troy on my account.”

  “But you don’t think Merrick will respect your wishes?”

  “When Merrick was a child, his mother was beaten to death, and he was the victim of his father’s brutal abuse. Merrick started out pretty powerless, but at this point he’s anything but. When it comes to protecting the women and children in his territory, he’s liberal with the use of force, and that’s for people he doesn’t know personally.

  “Now he’s got a young wife that he loves who was exploited in her teens by an older man who continues to live a privileged life. Nothing I say will convince Merrick that Troy doesn’t deserve worse than he’s gotten so far. At the moment, Merrick’s focused on other things; Troy’s lucky he is. I think it’s best not to wave any red capes in front of a bull.”

  “His killing an Etherlin Council member would have a lot of consequences for you both. Aren’t you worried about how dangerous Merrick is? Aren’t you afraid you won’t be able to control him?”

  “To quote Merrick, ‘If you want something tame, you shouldn’t keep a lion for a pet.’”

  “Do you want someone wild?”

  “Apparently, I do,” Alissa said with a sheepish smile. “And it’s not as if he and Lysander kill without provocation. They actually have the right moral compass; they’re just more prone to violence than we’re used to.”

  “But don’t you think you might eventually regret this? Running away with him? Marrying him so fast?”

  Alissa shook her head. “He was always going to be the one I fell in love with. I was drawn to him from the first moment I saw him. I would’ve ended up with him much earlier if I hadn’t been afraid of damaging my magic by leaving the Etherlin and if I hadn’t been worried that my dad would deteriorate if I took him away from the house full of my mom’s memory. But after opening the ancient portal, my magic’s stronger than ever, and my dad’s doing well here. Merrick’s extremely good with him. Most importantly, Merrick loves me the way I deserve to be loved.” Alissa rubbed her wedding ring absently. “Home will always be the place where Merrick and I can be together.”

  Alissa’s conviction took Cerise’s breath away. Did Alissa really know what she’d gotten herself into? Was she seeing things clearly, or was she simply blinded by love’s early infatuation?

  “The ventala syndicate’s bloodthirsty, and they won’t give up. What if something happens to Merrick?” Cerise asked, thinking of the morning after Griffin had died. The devastation and the ache that had never seemed to go away. “Is it really better to have loved and lost?”

  “What’s the alternative when you love someone with every part of your heart? Denying that kind of feeling doesn’t work. There’s no place to hide from it. No way to escape. No matter what happens, I’ll never be sorry that I was with him. When I fell in love with Merrick, I found myself. I’ll never regret it.”

  Cerise stared at her. Alissa had obviously imagined what might come to pass. To know that and to choose a potentially destructive path…it took real strength. If Cerise had known what would happen with Griffin, she wasn’t sure she could’ve let herself get so close to him.

  “Besides,” Alissa added with a small grin. “You’ve seen him under fire. A part of me just has faith that he’s as invincible as he seems.”

  “If only all the guys we fell for were invincible.”

  Alissa raised her brows in question.

  Cerise shrugged, took a drink to stall, then shook her head, exhaling audibly. “You aren’t the only one who’s kept secrets.”

  Cerise looked into Alissa’s face. Hard not to trust a beauty that seemed so pure. It had to be an advantage for Alissa as a muse; how could any aspirant resist opening up his mind under that gaze?

  Cerise wasn’t an aspirant, but she did have a burning need to unburden herself, to finally confide in someone.

  “I had an affair with Griffin Lane. He insisted we keep it a secret so that our romance wouldn’t overshadow his music. We’d been together seven months and were still in love when he fell off that cliff.”

  Alissa’s expression became pained, but she didn’t utter a word. She only reached across and put her hand on Cerise’s wrist, then slid it down to squeeze her fingers.

  Tears swam in Cerise’s eyes. “If he did fall.” Cerise swallowed hard and wiped away the moisture that formed on her lower lid. “We had a fight—I think we had a terrible fight. My memory of that night is foggy.” She shook her head, trying to recall the details. They wouldn’t surface. She clenched her fist in frustration.

  “Troy was the band’s publicist, and he was trying to help his friends who’d just opened their club, Handyrock’s in the Sliver, so the Times agreed to play the club to create some buzz for it. It was a small venue compared to the stadiums they’d gotten used to, and Griffin really got into the intimate setting. They did an acoustic version of ‘Never More’ that was amazing. It would’ve been a memorable night even if it hadn’t been Griffin’s last performance.

  “Afterward, Troy had all of us drinking shots of ouzo, but then the party sort of went to hell. Jersey had had this stomach flu that left her sick for weeks and she’d just gotten over it, so Griffin wasn’t happy about her drinking. And Griff had an argument with Troy about a music fest Troy wanted the Molly Times to do that Griffin didn’t. And Griffin and Hayden were sniping at each other for some reason, too. The night had started off great, but it really deteriorated. I remember him grabbing my hand and dragging me out the back door with Jersey in tow. We dropped her off, and the driver took us to the house Griffin and I had rented. We had wine, and I guess we got more drunk than we realized because I blacked out.

  “When I woke in the morning, I had this overwhelming feeling of dread. I knew. Just knew.” Cerise licked her lips, letting the tears fall. “I searched the house, but he wasn’t in it. I started calling around, trying to find him, but inside I thought: He’s dead. I felt like I’d crushed him. He’d crushed me, too, of course. But I was alive to see the sun, so that didn’t seem as important.

  “By afternoon, Hayden was turning over rocks at the crash pads they’d used before they were famous. I didn’t want to look for Griffin in the city though. I knew I wouldn’t find him there.

  “I borrowed a pair of his snow boots. I’m so tall and have the hands and feet to match. Sometimes Griffin and I wore each other’s stuff. Naturally it fit us differently, but somehow it worked.” She smiled ruefully. “He was thin…such a child-man.” She sighed. “Sometimes he could be ruthless, but I’d look at his face, so young and sweet, and I almost couldn’t believe it. That’s how beauty is dangerous. It makes you make allowances that you really shouldn’t.” Cerise bit her lip. “When I went out that day, I started walking and didn’t stop until I found footprints in the snow. I remember everything about those moments. I remember tying the purple sash on my wool coat. I remember the way the snow dust covered the tops of the ugly green boots. I remember staring at the tracks in the snow and realizing that the shape…” Cerise trailed off for a m
oment, her voice wistful. “From the shape, I knew he hadn’t been walking. He’d been running for his life…or to end it. The tracks led right off the cliff. There were no other footprints in the snow. No animal or person had pursued him that night. If he ran from something it was the demons inside him…maybe the ones that rose from the things I said.” She shrugged. “I’ll never know if he was running toward the edge of the cliff on purpose. It had been pitch-black that night. He might just have been running, and the edge was there.” She paused. “I only know that he didn’t slip and fall the way the story’s been reported. The marks near the edge where someone slipped were mine. I went to look. I saw his body, and I almost joined him at the bottom of the ravine. But I guess I didn’t love him with every part of my heart because I clawed my way back up.”

  Alissa’s small hand, warm and reassuring, held firmly to Cerise’s.

  “I want his songbook. Sometimes he used it as a journal. I have to see what he wrote that last week. I need to.”

  “We’ll get it back for you.”

  “What if the angel doesn’t want to give it up?”

  “We’ll get it back,” Alissa repeated.

  Chapter 8

  Cerise woke to the sound of someone humming. She moved the arm that was across her eyes, confused for a moment about where she was until she realized she had fallen asleep on the couch in Merrick and Alissa’s penthouse.

  Cerise remembered that Merrick had returned after having recovered his people. Arrangements to bury the dead and to reward the living had been managed quickly, and then, after pointing out the guest room where she could sleep, Merrick had taken Alissa to bed. Cerise had lain on the couch, unable to make herself move to the guest room. Exhaustion had battled insomnia until exhaustion won out.

  Sitting up now, she found the source of the humming. Alissa’s father, Richard, was dressed in jeans, a cream fisherman’s knit sweater, and house slippers. He set a dish of warm cranberry scones on the sleek coffee table, and she smiled at him. Cerise had grown into her looks, but before that, she’d lived through what she referred to as her ballerina troll years. She’d been graceful, but hardly attractive. Thick-browed, enormously tall, and fifteen squishy pounds too heavy for the magazine photo spreads they’d forced her to do, she’d been painfully self-conscious. Over time, her face morphed into something exotic, her body grew strong, and if not exactly lithe, at least toned and voluptuous. Before her looks had evolved, she’d suffered the usual girlhood insecurities, which her father and the council had done nothing to assuage. Richard North, however, who’d had a wife and daughter formed of blonde perfection, had been generous and kind in his flattery of Cerise, telling her she’d grow up to become an Amazon queen. She hadn’t believed it at the time, but as an adult woman she did feel powerful and confident.