Griffin's Shadow

by Lelsie Ann Moore

  “Jelena…” he began, but she laid a finger to his lips, stilling his words.

  “Please don’t say anything, Ashi.”

  He gathered her into his arms and held her while she cried.

  ~~~

  That night, Ashinji dreamed of fire. Flames shot up in bright walls all around him, yet he could not run fast enough to escape. The sounds of pursuit—the thud of horses’ hooves, the hoarse shouts of men—echoed in his ears; suddenly, he found himself surrounded by shadows, all featureless, save one. He knew, with terrible certainty, that if he could recognize that face, he would be able to save himself.

  ‘Help me!’ he cried, but harsh laughter drowned out his plea. The eyes of the one he should have known burned like stars—cold and distant. Ashinji realized at that moment he was lost. A high-pitched keening, like the wail of a damned soul tore at his ears. He looked down to see an arrow had sprouted from his chest. Bright blood, red as roses, spurted, and he fell, down, down, into darkness…

  …and woke with a start, clammy with sweat. His heart hammered against his ribcage and his limbs shook with the knowledge that he had just experienced not a dream, but a vision of his future. He turned to look at Jelena, who lay facing him, sleeping soundly. As he watched, she sighed and muttered, then rolled onto her other side, away from him.

  He lay back and took a deep breath, trying to will his body to relax, but to no avail. He knew he would sleep no more this night.

  When Jelena awoke the following morning, she found him sitting in the window, staring out over the rooftops, his eyes narrowed against the red glare of the rising sun.

  ~~~

  “Little Brother, your first duty as my second-in-command is to hold my stirrup while I mount.” Sadaiyo grinned in more of a wolfish display of his teeth than an actual smile.

  “Good morning to you, too, Brother,” Ashinji replied, determined to keep a rein on his temper. “The company is assembled and ready to move out as soon as you give the order.”

  “Lord Ashinji!” a familiar voice called. Ashinji turned to see Gendan approaching at a brisk walk, helmet tucked beneath one arm; Aneko trailed him by a few steps. The Captain of the Kerala Guard bowed crisply to Sadaiyo, acknowledging his presence, as did Aneko, but both gave their entire attention to Ashinji as Gendan spoke.

  “It’s good to see you, my lord,” the captain exclaimed.

  “Likewise, Gendan,” Ashinji replied, then turning to Aneko, he said, “Jelena has missed you. She wanted to visit you at the barracks, but…”

  “I understand, my lord,” Aneko replied, smiling. “Things have changed a lot. My good friend Jelena is no longer as free as she once was. Such is the fate the One has decreed for her.”

  “You must be anxious to get back home to see your wife, Gendan,” Ashinji said. “I’m sure it’s been hard being separated from her these past months.”

  Gendan nodded. “Kami’s a strong girl, my lord, but no woman should have to endure childbirth without her man beside her. Your father, Goddess bless him, has given me permission to stay at Kerala ‘til after Kami delivers.”

  “My father is a compassionate man,” Ashinji replied, studiously ignoring Sadaiyo.

  “I have work to do,” Sadaiyo grumbled, clearly irritated at not being the center of attention. Both Kerala guards bowed their heads as he stomped off.

  “Jelena should be here any moment,” Ashinji said. “She’s probably with my father and the king. She’ll come out with them to see us off.”

  Ashinji observed Gendan discreetly watching his brother. The captain frowned as Sadaiyo berated a soldier for some minor infraction. His eyes flashed as they shifted to Ashinji. “May I speak freely, my lord?” he asked.

  “Of course, Gendan. You needn’t ever be afraid to tell me what’s on your mind.”

  “I know why ‘tis Lord Sadaiyo leads this expedition, rather than you, my lord, and we’ll all obey him, as is our duty, but…” He paused, lower lip caught between his teeth. Ashinji remained silent, waiting for the captain to collect his thoughts and continue. Gendan leaned forward, his voice barely above a whisper. “Just know, should you need us, the Kerala home guard’ll stand behind you, my lord.”

  Aneko nodded in agreement. “We will always have your back, Lord Ashinji,” she said.

  Ashinji tugged at his earlobe, unsure of how to respond to Gendan’s words. Kerala’s captain had made it clear where his loyalties lay, and the part of Ashinji that despised the kind of man his brother was, felt deeply moved. The other part that honored familial duty pricked him with guilt.

  Ashinji’s father had placed him under his brother’s command, in a position of trust. He was honor-bound to obey Sadaiyo’s orders, whatever he might personally feel about his brother.

  Shouts and cries of “The king is here!” rose above the throng of soldiers and horses milling about the parade ground.

  Gendan tapped Aneko’s arm. “We’d best be gettin’ back to our places.” He then looked pointedly at Ashinji. “Remember what I said, my lord.”

  Ashinji watched as the two Kerala guards hurried away and were swallowed up by the crowd, then turned and headed toward the castle’s main entrance. Soldiers stepped aside to let him pass, many of them offering him words of greeting. Since becoming the son-in-law of Silverlock, Ashinji found himself in a position where he had never expected to be—he was famous.

  And rich, in his own right. As a wedding gift, the king had given him the best thing he possibly could have—financial independence in the form of his own land. Just yesterday, Ashinji had received the first financial reports. The estate of Goura was small, but profitable, and would be even more so once a competent manager could be found to run it. It lay about two day’s ride northeast of Kerala Castle, just over the border in neighboring Manza, the demesne of Lord Dai, Sadaiyo’s father-in-law.

  The family that had once held Goura had died out, leaving the estate vacant. Ordinarily, any vassal estate in which the family line became extinct would pass to the ruling lord to be disposed of as he or she saw fit. Most of the time, the land would be given to a younger child of the lord. No doubt, the king had compensated Lord Dai well for the land.

  Misune probably would have received Goura, Ashinji thought. No doubt Sadaiyo has already pointed out to her how I’ve been given what should have rightfully been hers.

  He reached the broad, shallow steps leading up to the castle’s main entrance just as his father, the king, Prince Raidan, and Jelena all emerged. He waited for them to reach the bottom stair, then bowed his head. “Your Majesty, your Highness.” He looked up and caught Jelena’s eye.

  When he had left her behind in the warm haven of their bed before sunrise, he had made her promise she would eat something before she came down to see him off. He raised his eyebrows questioningly.

  “Yes, I ate,” Jelena replied, laughing, but her voice caught and he saw tears glittering in her eyes. Despite her brave face, put on for his benefit, he sensed her fear, though she held it well in check. She came and stood beside him, linking her arm with his.

  “Where is your brother, Son?” Sen inquired, eyes scanning the crowd.

  “I’m not sure,” Ashinji replied. He looked over his shoulder. “He was…”

  “Here he comes now,” Prince Raidan said.

  Sadaiyo emerged from the throng, looking harried and followed by an equally harried aide. He sketched a bow before the king and the prince. His eyes flicked over Ashinji and away again, as if his brother wasn’t worth his attention.

  “The army is ready to form up and move out, your Majesty,” Sadaiyo reported.

  “Very good,” Keizo replied. “You may give the order any time.”

  “Father, have you seen Misune?” Sadaiyo inquired, his voice rough with irritation. Sen shook his head.

  “Haven’t seen her, Son. I’m sure she’ll be here before you leave, though.”

  “She’d better be,” Sadaiyo grumbled. He turned to Ashinji. “Go and give the order.” He bowed again a
nd dashed off into the crowd, shouting for his aide to bring his horse. The king, Prince Raidan, and Sen had all moved off a little way and stood in a close huddle, their expressions intense. Ashinji slipped an arm around Jelena’s waist and pulled her close so he could speak to her without having to raise his voice. He put a hand under her chin and tilted her face up so he could gaze into the warm hazel of her eyes.

  He opened his mouth but no words would come, as if his tongue had lost all ability to form meaningful sounds.

  I love her so much, it hurts, he thought. I can’t burden her now, not when we are about to part, with the vision I’ve been given of my future.

  She gazed expectantly at him, love flowing out of her body like the blue fire she harbored within herself. It felt so sweet, and yet the pain of knowing he might not live to see her again made it almost unbearable.

  His throat ached with unshed tears.

  “Jelena,” he began, then paused to catch his breath.

  “What is it, my love?” she whispered.

  He rested his forehead against hers. “There’s too much to say and not enough time for all of the words,” he said. “Let me try and mindspeak to you.” She nodded and closed her eyes.

  He rarely used his ability to mindspeak. It always made his head hurt when he tried, but any amount of pain seemed worth the effort to convey his innermost feelings.

  He entered her mind as gently as he could, amazed anew at the brilliance of it. The blue fire burned at the core of her being, mysterious and powerful, but he shied away from it, wary of its strength. He opened himself to her and let the love that filled his soul pour from him like blood from an open wound. He gave every drop he could, and when he could give no more, he withdrew.

  Jelena cried out as he staggered, momentarily weak as a kitten. She clutched at him, trying to hold him up while he willed his knees to lock and take his weight. The weakness passed, but he knew the ache in his head would linger for hours.

  “Ashinji!” Jelena whispered fiercely. “Ashi, look at me!” He met her eyes and winced at the intensity of her gaze. “Ashi, you promise me that you’ll come back to me—to us!” She grabbed his hand and pressed it against her belly. “This is your child in here, a child that needs its father! Promise you’ll come back!”

  He closed his eyes.

  “Promise!” she cried.

  He kissed her, and though he tried, he could not keep the desperation out of it. Jelena sobbed once, then with a mighty effort, stifled her tears. When at last she lifted her head, she had fully regained her composure.

  “I swear, my love, that I will do everything in my power to return to you and our child,” Ashinji murmured. Jelena nodded, and as she reached up to touch his face, he grabbed her fingers and pressed them to his lips.

  “Captain Sakehera!” Sadaiyo bellowed. Ashinji sighed and turned to face his brother, who approached the steps on the back of a bay stallion. “You’ve had long enough to make your farewells! Get to your horse and give the order to form up! Now!”

  “Go,” Jelena said, pulling herself up straight and proud, like a true princess.

  “Lord Ashinji, your horse!” Homan, first sergeant of Peregrine Company and Ashinji’s aide, came forward, leading Ashinji’s favorite black charger Kian. Homan held the animal’s head while Ashinji mounted, then handed up his captain’s helmet. Jelena moved over to stand at Ashinji’s foot. She rested a hand on his stirrup. He looked down into her beautiful face.

  “We’ll be waiting for you,” she said. He pulled the helmet down on his head and buckled the chinstrap, glad his face was now hidden from her. He did not want her last memory of him to be one in which he wept.

  Chapter 16

  Toward A Dark Horizon

  Misune made her appearance just before Sadaiyo gave the order to ride out. Lifting the hem of her bright yellow gown, she swept down the steps and strode briskly towards Sadaiyo’s horse, golden lion’s eyes flashing and mouth set in a petulant frown.

  Ashinji felt a twinge of sympathy for her.

  She is a skilled warrior, after all, he thought, and if she weren’t pregnant, she’d be riding out with us.

  Ashinji watched from a discreet distance as his brother and sister-in-law exchanged a few tense words. He couldn’t hear what they said, but from the looks on their faces, and by the way Misune stomped off, he deduced their parting had been less than tender.

  He took one last glimpse of Jelena, who had moved to stand between his father and the king, before urging his horse forward into place beside his brother.

  The grille of Sadaiyo’s helmet obscured his facial expression, but his movements as he readied himself to ride were sharp and angry. Ashinji refrained from any comments; long, bitter experience told him that to say anything now would only invite a vicious verbal attack. Instead, he checked his gear and waited for Sadaiyo to give the order.

  At last, Sadaiyo was ready. He raised a gloved hand in the air and swept it forward. Shouts ran up and down the lines as the signal passed through the ranks. The army began to move.

  The grinding crunch of gravel beneath hundreds of hooves, the mingled smells of horse and leather, the hard blue sky above—all of Ashinji’s senses were heightened, the knowledge of his impending death acting as a stimulant to his nervous system. Every scent, sound, and color seemed impossibly acute, crystalline and pure. The urge to look back over his shoulder to see Jelena one last time proved almost too much to bear, but he dared not.

  I might not be able to leave, he thought.

  The army snaked down through the city, making its way toward the gates. The people lined up along both sides of the street, watching somberly as it passed, over eight hundred strong. Ashinji, seeing the apprehension in their faces, realized they knew this represented only the beginning of what could prove to be a brutal, devastating war.

  Sadaiyo remained silent until they had ridden beyond the outer gates and out on the broad road leading east toward Kerala. “So, Little Brother. Our father has finally found a way to force us to work together.” His tone, as usual, dripped with sarcasm.

  “You are in command, Brother. I’ll follow your orders because that is my duty,” Ashinji answered. “All I ask is that you don’t allow your feelings for me to get in the way of your judgment. Too many lives are at stake.”

  “If you mean my deep brotherly love for you, don’t worry,” Sadaiyo retorted. He urged his mount forward and soon, his bigger, faster stallion had pulled ahead of Ashinji’s black gelding. Ashinji was content to let his brother ride ahead.

  As the morning wore on, the sun climbed higher and the day grew unseasonably warm. A late fall heat wave was not uncommon this far south—one last taste of summer before winter’s chill descended upon the land.

  I know what a chicken roasting in an oven must feel like, Ashinji thought. He finally loosened the chinstrap and pulled his helmet off, resisting the urge to hurl it away from him. Instead, he hung it from the pommel of his saddle.

  Looking over his shoulder at the ranks, Ashinji saw how the troops slumped in their saddles, wilting beneath the merciless sun. He made a decision.

  Sadaiyo still rode a slight distance ahead with his aide, forcing Ashinji to urge his horse into a jog to catch up. As he moved alongside, Sadaiyo acknowledged him with the merest flicker of a glance.

  Ignoring the implied slight, Ashinji spoke. “Perhaps it’s time to call a halt, Sadaiyo,” he suggested. “We’ve been riding steadily for at least three hours, and in this heat, the troops and horses will need more rest and water.”

  “No,” Sadaiyo answered. “I’ve got to get this army to Kerala in ten days’ time, and unless I push hard, we won’t make it.”

  “The troops will be in no shape to fight if they are pushed to exhaustion and they start dropping from the heat,” Ashinji pointed out. He kept his voice calm and reasonable. “Call a halt, Brother. It needn’t be a long one.” From the corner of his eye, Ashinji saw Sadaiyo’s aide staring intently over the tops of his own mount’s ear
s, pretending not to listen, but Ashinji knew better. The last thing he wanted was a public disagreement with Sadaiyo. Morale would suffer if the troops witnessed their leaders at odds.

  Ashinji couldn’t see his brother’s face, but by the slump of his shoulders, he knew Sadaiyo had reconsidered and given in to good sense.

  “Very well,” Sadaiyo answered through clenched teeth. “A brief stop. Give the order.”

  The relief of the troops was palpable. The air rang with laughter and shouts as they pulled off their helmets and many upended water bottles over sweating faces. Ashinji poured water into a leather cup and held it up to Kian’s muzzle so he could drink. The horse eagerly sucked the cup dry and nosed Ashinji’s hand for more. He allowed the gelding one more drink before putting the bottle to his own lips.

  Sadaiyo had removed his own helmet and now stood in the shade of a large old oak tree beside the road, deep in conversation with a man dressed in the plain garb of an estate worker. As Ashinji approached, he heard Sadaiyo tell the man to convey his thanks to his mistress. The man, after bobbing his head several times, turned and hurried off. Ashinji saw him mount an ugly mule and set off at a cumbersome trot down the road.

  “Who was that?” he asked, pointing at the receding figures of man and mule.

  “A servant from Enzan Estate,” Sadaiyo answered. He took a drink from his water bottle and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “Enzan’s only about another three hour’s march down the road. The Lady sent him out to invite us to camp on her lands. She’s even promised to feed all the senior officers...and put you and me up in the manor.”

  “Amazing how quickly news of an army on the move travels,” Ashinji commented. He dropped to the ground and lay in the tough grass, folding his arms behind to cradle his aching head, still sore from mindspeaking with Jelena. “It will be nice to eat something other than camp food, but I’ll be sleeping under the stars tonight with my company,” he stated.

  Sadaiyo rolled his eyes. “Suit yourself,” he replied. “I, for one, won’t pass up the chance to sleep in a real bed.”