All the Hidden Sins

by Marian Lanouette

  Kyra put her arms around him, rubbed her hands up and down his back, offering comfort. “You didn’t. It’s no one’s fault we ran into her tonight. I wish I could erase your pain.”

  “You being here’s enough.” She wondered if that was true.

  At her door, she asked, “Do you want to come in?”

  “Yes.”

  Once inside, Jake took her into his arms again. Kyra leaned up on her toes and pressed her lips to his. Jake pulled back, looking into her eyes.

  “I care for you, Kyra. You understand that, don’t you?”

  “You don’t need to reassure me.”

  “I’m not. It was a little awkward tonight—shit, a lot awkward.” He broke the embrace, paced the room.

  “Is this the first time you’ve seen her since the breakup?”

  “Yes. Every emotion I had rushed back and whacked me upside the head.”

  “You’re so poetic.” Kyra forced a smile, hoping to relax him.

  “Right, more like idiotic. Still want me to stay?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why?” Oh Jake, I’m not giving you up without a fight.

  “Because I enjoy your company. And tonight you need a friend—I’m your friend.” He came back to her, gave her a hug.

  “Thanks.” Christ, I was hoping for more.

  “You’re welcome. Do you want a drink?”

  “No, only you.”

  “Well, you’re in luck. I’m available.”

  “That makes me the luckiest guy alive.”

  “You sweet-talking devil, come into the bedroom before you spew more lies.”

  “Not lying.”

  Chapter 21

  Jake hunted up his phone and looked at the display. Kyra caught the frown before he blanked out his expression. Not cop blank…guy blank.

  “A problem?” she asked.

  “It’s Mia,” he said.

  “Why don’t you take it in the other room?”

  Silence. She hated silence. The phone stopped ringing…more silence.

  Awkward, awkward, awkward. What do you say to a guy when you’re naked in bed with him and the love of his life calls? Another round, or I’ll kill her for you? What is the proper etiquette?

  “I’m not going to talk to her right now.”

  “Your choice.” She shrugged then rolled away from him.

  He caught her and turned her back to him. She settled in on top of him. Kyra was torn. Jake never lied to her, but how was she supposed to handle this—Mia intruding in her bedroom?

  “Does she always call this early?”

  “No.”

  “I see.” Kyra’s temper flashed. She tried rolling off him again, but he tightened his hold on her.

  “You see what, Kyra?”

  “Calling this early is a way to find out if you slept alone last night.” Jesus, I sound jealous. I should be rejoicing—this is my ticket out of danger. And a way to get Jake out of Phil’s sight.

  “She only wants to talk.”

  “Right,” Kyra said, more annoyed with Jake than with Mia. How stupid men were. “Doesn’t it seem strange she wants to talk all of a sudden after seeing you out with another woman?”

  Silence.

  He stroked her back. Kyra waited.

  “You’re probably right.”

  Oh, good. Now what? Kyra tried to push off Jake and again he held her to him.

  “I’m going to call her back later to see what she wants. One way or another I need to hash things out with her. Do you understand?”

  Ball’s in my court now. “Yes and no.”

  “I love a straight answer.”

  If she let go, she’d have a much simpler life. But the heart wants what the heart wants. Had she replaced her gambling with him? Not something she wanted to get into right now. “You need to speak with her. You belong with her, not me.” The tears welled in her eyes.

  “Are you’re walking away?”

  “I’m not. I like you and I haven’t had this much fun in years.” Kyra smiled into his chest even as a tear slipped down her cheek. Once again she was on the short end of the stick.

  He rolled them over. Now on top, Jake pushed up on one elbow and thumbed away her tears. Her heart screamed choose me. Her brain screamed run.

  “I care for you, but I’m confused about Mia. I don’t have a better answer for you.”

  How sick was she? With the threat of losing him looming over her, she wanted him even more. It was like putting more money into a losing machine.

  “Kyra,” he choked out.

  “What?”

  “I don’t want to hurt you.”

  “Jake, if you stop now, I swear I’ll kill you.”

  “You shouldn’t threaten a cop.”

  “I’d get away with it. Justifiable homicide.”

  “Kyra…”

  “How did we go from playful teasing to…dread, pain, rejection?”

  “I should go.”

  “If you leave now, don’t bother to come back.”

  She shoved him away and surged off the bed. She paced naked around the room. Her body was a heat missile filled with rage. Or was it jealousy?

  “Please come back here.”

  “Why? Mia accomplished her goal. Since you received that damn phone call, your mind’s been on her and not me.”

  “It’s been on the both of you.” His honesty killed her. He got up and walked to her with his arms held open for her. She stepped into them. “I told you in the beginning there were issues.”

  “Issues are one thing, leaving me hanging in the middle of the act is another.”

  “I wasn’t leaving. You acted like you wanted me to go.”

  “When someone says ‘I should go,’ I get the impression they’re leaving.” She stepped away from him, resumed her pacing.

  “I was giving you the opportunity to kick me out, but you didn’t take it.”

  She didn’t have words.

  “Kyra?”

  “You’re right, I didn’t.”

  How did she say what was on her mind without scaring him away?

  “Jake, I’ve come to care for you a lot more than I planned on, but with that said, I need to know that when you’re with me—you’re with me.”

  “I’ve always been with you. Last night, running into her blindsided me.”

  Jake reached for her, but Kyra wasn’t ready to settle. She’d probably regret what she was about to do for the rest of her life. What choice did she have? The red haze of anger encompassed her, blocked any rational decision making process. The hurt fueled her temper clouding her judgement. Now wasn’t the time for decisions. Past experiences taught her that.

  “You should leave. Go talk to her and take a couple of days to mull things over. When you have your head on straight, give me a call.” Kyra reached for her robe. She started to put it on. She got an arm through one sleeve before Jake backed her up against the wall. The robe slid off. He put his hands around her bare waist. She wanted him. She looked up into his eyes, amazed when she saw hurt, not anger, in them.

  “Don’t push me away, Kyra, not now.”

  “I’m angry and confused. You weren’t supposed to steal my heart and now…”

  “I never intended to hurt you. And now…where do we go from here?” Jake’s phone rang. He checked the number. “I have to take this. It’s Dispatch.”

  Kyra watched her lover become the cop. She listened as he repeated a name and an address as he wrote them on his note pad. She wondered who had gone missing or, worse, who was dead?

  “I’ll check it out.” He hung up, turning to Kyra. “I need to get going, but I’ll call this afternoon. We’ll finish this conversation tonight?”

  Why am I complicating my life? It’s the perfect opportunity to let Jake go—
but I can’t.

  He raised her chin until she was staring him in the eye. “Kyra?”

  “Talk to her first, before you call.”

  “I will.”

  Why did life have to be cruel? After Jake dressed and left, Kyra climbed back into bed, pulled the covers over her head. Last night Mia had seemed as shocked and hurt as Jake. This wasn’t her fault either. All along, she’d envisioned Mia with warts, but instead she was glamorous. Pity for Mia. Where the hell did that come from?

  Alone for the first time since she got her first look at Mia, dread plowed through her. It had shocked her to learn the woman with the body of a lingerie model was Mia. Tall, leggy, with midnight colored hair styled in a blunt-cut and vivid blue eyes, was her competition. For some reason she’d pictured Mia as a short blonde with a curvy figure.

  Well, at least Jake didn’t go for a stereotype. It lightened her mood some when she realized last night she wasn’t a replica or a replacement.

  * * * *

  Jake left Kyra’s condo and headed over to pick up Louie on the way to an address on the east side of town Dispatch had given him. The woman purported to have information about Saul Church, the man who’d disappeared a few weeks ago.

  “What does she know?” Louie asked.

  “Dispatch didn’t say.”

  Jake drove into the apartment complex where Saul Church lived. Chances of finding Church alive were getting slimmer as each day passed. His gut told him Church was dead, but he needed to follow the leads. Chugging the rest of his coffee, he tossed the cup in a garbage can on his way out of the car.

  “Which unit?” Louie asked.

  “8E.”

  “Not much for conversation this morning?”

  “No.”

  “Alrighty then,” Louie said, knocking on the door.

  “Mrs. Standish?” Jake asked when it opened.

  “Yes.”

  “I’m Lieutenant Carrington. This is my partner, Sergeant Romanelli.”

  “Can I see some ID please?”

  After she inspected their badges, she opened the door wider. “Come in. Sorry for getting you up early, but I wanted to talk to you before everyone else in the complex got up. I don’t want to be tagged as nosy.”

  “I understand,” Jake said, and did. Mrs. Standish was the go-to person in the neighborhood for any gossip. “What do you have for us, Mrs. Standish?”

  “You don’t want coffee or anything?”

  “No ma’am, but thank you for asking.” Jake made a show of taking out his notebook and pen to move her along.

  “Sorry, Lieutenant, but I need my coffee before we begin.” She walked into what Jake assumed was the kitchen. Once she came back out, they took seats in her living room. She started right in on her story.

  “I mind my own business, but that day something made me get up from my soaps to look outside. I can’t say it was a noise or anything…”

  Jake figured this was going to be a long story. “Mrs. Standish, what did you see?”

  “I’ll tell this my own way, Lieutenant. Anyway, I see these three guys banging on Mr. Church’s door. When he didn’t answer, they kept on banging. It was obvious Church didn’t answer his door. I was about to go out there to tell them he wasn’t home when the door opened. I didn’t see who opened it, but I assumed it was Saul. The men walked into the apartment and I went back to my soaps.” Jake stared at her.

  “Is that all you saw? Can you describe the men?”

  “I’m not blind, son. Of course I can describe them. It’s why I called the station.” Jake watched her get up, head back into her kitchen. He was about to go after her when she returned with a note pad.

  “Here we are. I wrote down everything because it didn’t sit right with me, especially after they left with Mr. Church between them. Let me tell you, he looked scared.”

  Frustrated and ready to beat her with a stick, he asked, “You saw Saul Church leave with them? Are you sure?”

  “I heard another commotion. I got up and went to the window again. That’s when I saw them. And yes, I’m sure.” It took great effort for Jake to hold his temper.

  “And you never saw Mr. Church again, after that day?”

  “No. You know, Lieutenant, I did call to the station that day, but the officer who answered asked if I saw a weapon. I didn’t. His tone was insulting. I’m sure he put me down as a crank.”

  “I’m sorry for that. Why did you call back?” Jake asked.

  “I saw his name in the paper this morning…” Mrs. Standish shrugged.

  “I’m glad you did. For your safety, I’m not going to put your name in my report.”

  “I’m in danger?”

  “I can’t say, but take precautions.”

  “What kind of people are they?”

  “I don’t know.”

  If he was right, and the mob was involved, and he told her, she’d repeat it to anyone who’d listen and then she’d be dead. No, he wasn’t going to tell her. He looked over at Louie. Louie nodded.

  “Mrs. Standish, please don’t talk to anyone about what you saw.”

  “I’m not stupid, Lieutenant.”

  Jake and Louie questioned her some more. When he was satisfied she had nothing else to give them, they stood. She walked them to the door.

  “Thanks for your time.”

  Jake stood outside his vehicle and scanned the neighborhood. Over the top of the car, he said, “Will she or won’t she?”

  “She’s already told anyone who’d listen.”

  “You’re right,” Jake said.

  “What else is bothering you? You almost lost your temper back there. That’s not like you,” Louie pressed.

  He told Louie what had happened between him, Kyra, and Mia.

  “What are you going to do about the both of them?”

  “Damn if I know,” Jake said, frustrated. They drove the rest of the way to the station in silence.

  * * * *

  Back at the station, Jake requested the dispatcher’s call sheets from the day Mr. Church went missing. It matched today’s call sheet. Which was unfortunate, but Mrs. Standish was right—the dispatcher had put her call down as unfounded, no action needed. Was the dispatcher an idiot, or working with Stack? If they had acted sooner… It’s hard to play the what if game. Jake walked into his captain’s office and shut the door behind him.

  “Problem?”

  “Yes. There’s a Missing Persons’ case I’m working. A woman called in when she saw the man being escorted from his home. The dispatcher put her down as a crank.” Jake handed McGuire the dispatcher’s sheet.

  McGuire studied it, took off his glasses, and pinched his nose. “How do you want to handle this?”

  “I want to question the dispatcher without identifying the caller. She’s in her seventies. She doesn’t need any trouble.”

  “Trouble from the dispatcher?”

  “No, the mob.” Jake watched McGuire’s forehead wrinkle.

  “A hit?”

  “Yep.”

  “Why?”

  Jake updated Shamus about Church’s gambling debts.

  “Do we need to offer protection to the witness?”

  “It’d be wise, but I’m not sure she’ll take it. She’s a tough old bird.”

  “You’re overseeing the department, but why are you working this one?”

  Again Jake filled McGuire in on Stack’s case. He gave Shamus a minute to process the information.

  “Have you questioned Stack?” McGuire asked.

  “No, not yet. I can’t say why—it’s…” Jake stopped, stared and waited for McGuire to catch up.

  “He’s dirty?”

  “I’ve got no proof. But where there’s smoke…I need time to investigate the crime. See where it leads me.”

  “Ke
ep me informed. When you’re ready to question Stack, let me know. How’s your department getting along?”

  “It’s going. Burke and Kraus are still looking for Spike. Lanoue and Brown closed the hit-and-run. They’re still working the school shooting. I have no conflicts running both departments.”

  “Things are going to heat up if you’re right about Stack and the mob.”

  Jake didn’t doubt it—every cop’s nightmare was turning in one of their own. He didn’t believe in the “Blue Wall” when it pertained to a dirty cop. He hoped he could withstand the heat, yet again.

  Chapter 22

  The tower of files now covering his desk gave him a headache. Jake grunted at the boatload of paperwork he’d acquired. He needed to get his case reports done and handed in. It bothered him some that he’d put Stack in McGuire’s line of sight, but he trusted McGuire to withhold judgment until all evidence was presented. McGuire would throw Stack to Internal Affairs for a full investigation if he found documentation pointing to his corruption. Jake’s gut told him Carl Stack was as dirty as they came. An experienced investigator doesn’t ignore a case unless he wants to. Decision made, Jake pulled all of Stack’s physical case files himself for the last six months, heading off any talk that would have resulted from requesting them through proper channels. Tonight, over a beer, he’d review them.

  He didn’t leave the office until eight o’clock. It hit him on the way home that he hadn’t called Kyra as promised. He speed dialed her as he drove. The call went to voicemail right away. After leaving a message he dialed Mia’s number.

  “Hello?”

  “I see you called this morning.” Controlled—that’s what his voice sounded like to him. He wondered if it sounded that way to her.

  “I did.”

  “What do you need?” Nice, Jake.

  “Can we set up a date to talk?”

  “Ah…has anything changed?” With gut clenched, a rush of nerves overtook his entire body. White knuckles gripped the steering wheel while his other hand pressed the phone closer to his ear. A sharp inhale filled his ears. Jake waited her out while his stomach rolled like a sea in a hurricane.

  “I miss you,” she whispered.