The January Wish

by Juliet Madison

  It was nice to be among the crowd, nobody knowing who she was. Sylvia loved the homely feel of Tarrin’s Bay, but sometimes it was nice to be anonymous. Almost everyone in town knew her, and as a respected member of the community she made sure she always gave a good impression, and never lost her cool while waiting in a queue or stuck in traffic. Sylvia valued her reputation highly, and felt a responsibility to set a good example and be a respected role model. It was easy anyway. She wasn’t a ‘party-girl’ or an outgoing eccentric, but a sensible, independent, thirty-four-year-old woman who had worked hard to get to where she was.

  After checking the time, Sylvia sat in a seat at gate eighteen to await the boarding call. The plane arrived outside the window and, almost hypnotised, her eyes followed the luggage handlers heaving the bags from the plane to the carts. Passengers filtered into the airport through the doorways, and those waiting for the flight shuffled in their seats, pulling out boarding passes from their pockets. Some stood, preparing to line up for the boarding announcement. Sylvia remained still. No rush. She didn’t understand why people always tried to get in first. Everyone would get to their seat eventually. Plus, having chosen an aisle seat, there’d be no point rushing, as the passengers allocated seats next to hers would only have to clamber over her.

  The herd of people filtering in from the plane dissolved gradually into the crowd, some walking quickly, others stopping to yawn and stretch. Sylvia wondered what each was doing in Sydney. She amused herself by trying to guess who might be arriving home and who was simply visiting. Perhaps some had bought a one-way ticket and were staying.

  Then her heart skipped a beat.

  A young woman entered the airport, placing iPod earphones into her ears, the thin white cords trailing down to her pocket. She smiled at the flight attendant as she walked past, and stopped to glance around, as if wondering which direction to go. The woman had a youthful radiance about her, a sense of excitement, like she was stepping into the world for the first time. She resumed walking, her head bobbing rhythmically to whatever music she was listening to, curly tendrils of hair bouncing happily about her face. Red curls, not orangey-red, but warm russet-like red curls…

  Just like hers.

  It was as though Sylvia was looking into a mirror, a younger image of herself reflected back. Like seeing her own ghost.

  As if connected by the similarities in their appearance, Sylvia stood and followed the young woman. She walked behind her in the crowd, until the woman stopped to admire a dress in a shop window; a long, floaty summer dress, with large pink and purple flowers printed on it. Not Sylvia’s style at all, but the woman seemed inspired by it. She took out her phone and snapped a picture of it.

  Strange.

  A smile growing on her face, the woman entered the shop, walking out a few minutes later with a large plastic bag in her hand. Sylvia couldn’t remember the last time she’d bought an outfit on a whim like that. Her purchases were always planned with purpose; crisp plain shirts, sensible heels, black, navy, or cream tailored pants for work, and casual jeans, t-shirts, and knit tops for weekends.

  She continued following the woman and waited again while she stopped to sample hand cream at a beauty shop.

  Should she approach her?

  But what would she say?

  Sylvia now felt incredibly silly, following a complete stranger. It was just her mind playing tricks. They weren’t really that similar. Their hair was practically identical, but the woman lacked Sylvia’s height, although her build was the same: small-chested and big-hipped.

  ‘Final boarding call for Dr Sylvia Greene. Dr Sylvia Greene to gate eighteen please.’ The voice beamed through the airport speaker system and Sylvia’s eyes jumped wide open.

  Oh God, my flight!

  How could she not have heard the first boarding call? She spun around and headed in the direction of gate eighteen, then turned back around.

  The woman was gone.

  Part of her wanted to continue through to the baggage terminal but that would be crazy. She had to go. Shaking the moment of insanity from her head, Sylvia ran in as dignified a way as possible to the boarding gate where an attendant was just about to block off the entrance with rope.

  A minute later she sat puffing in her seat on the plane.

  ‘Hi there, I’m Wayne,’ the elderly man next to her said as he held out his hand. ‘What do you do for a living, love?’

  ‘I’m a doctor,’ Sylvia replied.

  ‘Oh, really?’ The man twisted in his seat, sidling up close to her. ‘I might have to pick your brain then, you see, I’ve got this problem with…’

  Sylvia released a gentle sigh as Wayne told her his medical history and current symptoms. He was probably a relative of Mr Benson’s.

  This was going to be a dreadfully long ninety minutes.

  When the man seated on the other side of Wayne got involved in the conversation after mentioning that he too had suffered with unrelenting tinea for years, Wayne twisted to face him and they proceeded to discuss the fungal infection in detail. Sylvia took the golden opportunity to close her eyes and pretend to be asleep. She’d flip through the MasterChef magazine on the flight home next week instead.

  Her mind drifted back to that woman’s face, and the way her hair stood out from the crowd like a sunset on the horizon. Then she saw herself back at the Wishing Festival, tossing a coin into the fountain.

  Making a wish one day, stalking a stranger the next—what had gotten into her? Maybe she was working too hard. Maybe the ten days she took off over Christmas weren’t enough. Or maybe a hidden part of her was surfacing, trying to come to terms with what she did all those years ago.

  Chapter 3

  The medical conference was a welcome distraction; immersed in technical data and surrounded by other doctors, Sylvia almost forgot about her life back home and the crazy things she’d been doing. But time flew by, Thursday morning soon arrived and she was back at work.

  ‘Welcome back, how was the conference?’ asked Joyce.

  ‘Not bad, a little depressing though, which is kind of ironic considering it was a mental health conference,’ replied Sylvia. ‘But it was interesting, and nice to catch up with old friends.’

  ‘Well, we’re glad you’re back. Dr Bronovski has been worked to the grindstone without you here. We’ve had an influx of sick children lately.’

  ‘Oh dear.’ Sylvia’s shoulders sunk. ‘Well, I better get started.’ She turned towards her room.

  ‘Oh Sylvia, before you disappear, management called. They’ve decided on a new practitioner for the spare room, he’ll be starting next week.’

  Tarrin’s Bay Medical Clinic had just the two doctors, along with a physiotherapist, but the other room had become available when the dermatologist left three months ago.

  ‘Please tell me it’s a paediatrician? It has to be a paediatrician.’ Sylvia leaned forward onto the reception desk.

  It’s not that she didn’t like children, she just felt…uncomfortable working with them. She preferred patients you could reason with, who kept still, and didn’t have bodily fluids escaping out of various orifices without warning. Plus, as the only female general practitioner in town, parents flocked to her, probably expecting that her supposedly inbuilt maternal instinct would somehow make her a better doctor for their children.

  ‘Nope, no paediatrician I’m afraid,’ said Joyce. ‘A naturopath and acupuncturist will be joining the team.’

  ‘A what?’

  ‘A naturopath and acupuncturist. Mark Bastian, he’ll be in tomorrow to set up the room.’

  ‘You’ve got to be kidding!’ Sylvia looked at Joyce’s unblinking eyes and knew she wasn’t. ‘A paediatrician would have been so good, or even a psychologist, but a naturopath? I thought this was a medical centre.’

  ‘C’mon Sylvia, you’ve got to get with the times! And anyway, I hear he gets great results with his patients. He’ll be an asset to the centre.’

  Sylvia grumbled under her breath,
shuffling off to her room and grabbing her mail on the way through.

  Just as she feared, her day was filled with sick children, anxious parents, and the odd minor injury and infected boil. Three quarters of her time was spent with existing patients, the rest were newcomers. If work kept betting busier she’d have to close her books for a while, or work longer hours, something she wasn’t keen on. Sylvia loved her job, but some days were a challenge. Though the thought of seeing Richard tonight kept her going. She should be able to get home with enough time to prepare a simple salmon and dill pasta dish before he arrived. One of her regular weekday meals. Quick, easy, and tasty. Plus Richard was a big fan of seafood.

  Having had only ten minutes to scoff down lunch, and a couple of coffees in between patients, Sylvia was yawning by the time she finished off the paperwork and phone calls at the end of the day. Joyce and the other practitioners had already left, so she turned off the lights and air conditioning, switched on the alarm, and locked the door behind her as she left the refurbished weatherboard cottage that was as historic as the Wishing Fountain in Miracle Park.

  Although just after six-thirty, the sun shone as brightly as it did at midday. Not that she’d been able to enjoy it. She’d been indoors all day and only managed a quick glance out the window at lunchtime. Its golden glow sat low on the horizon, preparing to surrender to the night in another hour or so. Sylvia closed her eyes, savouring the refreshing breeze that whooshed past her.

  She opened her eyes and caught sight of a young woman nearby, her pink and purple floral dress billowing in the breeze.

  It was her.

  The woman from the airport with the russet-coloured curls…just like hers.

  Their green eyes locked, and a faint smile touched the woman’s face, just before her skin paled and she collapsed onto the grass next to the footpath.

  Sylvia rushed to her side and patted her cheeks. ‘Can you hear me, are you okay?’

  ‘What happened?’ the woman asked as her eyes opened.

  ‘It’s okay, I think you’ve just fainted. Here, have a sip of this.’ Sylvia threaded her arm under the woman’s shoulder and around her back, helping her sit up as she pulled a water bottle from her bag with the other hand and held it to the woman’s mouth. ‘How about I take you inside and check you out? I’m a doctor.’

  ‘Oh, no, it’s okay, I’m okay…really.’ Shakily, the woman stood, holding onto Sylvia’s arm for support. ‘I’ll be fine.’

  ‘You sure? Maybe you need something to eat. Hang on, I think I’ve got something in my bag.’ Sylvia rummaged through it.

  ‘Seriously, I’ll be fine. I was just a bit…overwhelmed, that’s all.’

  Sylvia looked up from her bag and into the young woman’s eyes and knew she’d seen them before. Not just at the airport, but long ago.

  The woman straightened and drew a deep breath, holding her own hands together as if for support. ‘My name is Grace. I’m your daughter.’

  Chapter 4

  Although Sylvia guessed the truth before she heard it, Grace’s revelation sparked a sharp gasp in Sylvia’s throat. The ground appeared to soften beneath her and she wished she had something to hold onto for fear of fainting herself.

  ‘How…how did you find me?’ Her voice shaking, she clutched at her bag awkwardly.

  ‘I’ve been looking for you for a few months. The internet is a wonderful thing. Once I found out you were a doctor, it was easy,’ Grace explained, while Sylvia’s eyes wandered over her features, noticing how her nose twitched as she spoke, and how her chin had a slight dimple—like her father’s.

  ‘So, you’re eighteen now?’ The question escaped Sylvia’s mouth just as she realised how stupid it sounded. Was that all she could do? Ask how Grace found her and state the obvious? Heat rose up the back of her neck and she rubbed her sweaty palm against it.

  Grace nodded. ‘Just.’

  At only sixteen years of age Sylvia had given birth to a baby girl on the first of January. New Year’s Day. Had she been a normal mother she may have made the evening news or the local newspaper, but Sylvia didn’t want to broadcast the hardest day of her life to the world.

  ‘I’m sorry to turn up out of the blue. I wasn’t even planning to introduce myself today. I just wanted to…see you.’ Grace’s soft eyes glistened.

  ‘But then I recognised you,’ Sylvia said softly.

  ‘And what do I do? I go and faint, how pathetic!’ A high-pitched giggle bubbled up from Grace’s lips.

  ‘That’s one sure way to get my attention!’ Sylvia smiled.

  Grace paused for a moment and pursed her lips to one side. ‘How could you recognise me? I mean, I guess our hair is the same.’ She pulled at a curl, extending it to twice its length in front of her face. ‘Was it my hair that gave me away?’

  ‘Partly. But, well, I actually saw you at the airport last week.’

  Grace’s curl bounced up like a spring as she let it go. ‘The airport? You were there?’

  Sylvia nodded. ‘But I didn’t know it was you, I mean, there was something about you that made me take a second look, and I did wonder, but I had to catch my flight.’ She didn’t want to mention how she’d followed her halfway across the airport and saw her buy the dress she was now wearing.

  ‘Wow.’ Grace looked up at the sky. ‘What a coincidence.’

  It sure was.

  Or was it?

  Maybe there was something to that Wishing Fountain legend.

  Nah, there couldn’t be. Sylvia shook the thought from her mind. It was scientifically impossible.

  ‘So, have you been here in Tarrin’s Bay since then, or did you spend some time in Sydney first?’

  ‘I’ve been here since the day I flew in. I’m staying over there at the caravan park.’ Grace pointed up the hill. ‘I rang your clinic to ask which days you worked, and the lady said you were away but due back on Thursday. So, here I am.’

  Grace lifted her palms in the air as if to show she’d suddenly appeared out of nowhere, and Sylvia’s heart lurched forward as she noticed Grace’s long slender fingers and was reminded of how soft her baby’s hands had been.

  Like a feather.

  If she focused hard she could still feel the gentle warmth of Grace’s little hand wrapped around her finger. So fragile, so tiny. She’d only had a brief moment with her daughter before they took her away. They said it was better not to hold her for too long, so Sylvia drank in the moment as best as she could, trying to imprint the memory in her mind.

  And later, trying her best to forget it.

  Sylvia swallowed the lump in her throat in effort to regain her composure. ‘So, how long are you here for?’

  ‘Don’t know yet. I just finished high school last year, and I’m taking a break this year till I figure out what I want to do. I have some money saved, so I’ll see how things go here for a bit—that’s if you’re okay with me being here? I mean, I can go if you want, I just wanted to meet you, I don’t expect—‘

  ‘Stay as long as you want,’ Sylvia found herself saying. ‘I’m sure you have a lot of questions, and well…I’d like to spend some time getting to know you.’

  Was this really happening? Sylvia’s stomach flitted this way and that, her nerves tingled, and she felt…awake. Here she was, standing on the footpath talking to her own daughter after all these years! She’d never even imagined her baby as a grown woman, just kind of expected she’d stay as small as when she left her at the hospital. She’d kept that image of her baby girl in her mind for years, even after two years had passed, then three, then four. Sylvia knew her daughter would be growing bigger and heading off to school. But, she’d tried not to think about those things. Somehow, the baby she’d given up was now a woman, standing right in front of her.

  Grace’s face glowed, in stark contrast to the paleness that had struck her down a few minutes ago. She was obviously pleased by Sylvia’s agreement to see her again. ‘Well, I’d better leave you to it, you’re probably tired after work.’ Grace
twirled and extended a curl again. ‘Would it be okay if we met up again sometime?’

  ‘Of course.’ This both scared and delighted Sylvia. ‘I could meet you after work tomorrow evening. We could grab a bite to eat in town, if you like?’

  ‘I’d love that.’ Grace grinned from ear to ear. ‘So I’ll see you here, same time?’

  Sylvia nodded. ‘Sure.’

  ‘Oh, and I’ll try not to faint this time!’ Grace turned around and floated up the hill towards the caravan park, snapping photos with her phone as she went. Sylvia’s heart beat at twice its normal speed as she stood there watching Grace’s figure become smaller and smaller in the distance until she could see her no more.

  Soft pink hues coloured the sky as Sylvia walked to the lookout just up from Miracle Park. Some locals walked their dogs, while others sat on the rocky ledge eating fish and chips, and a few leaned over the railing of the lookout, staring out at the endless ocean. When she reached the top, Sylvia took hold of the railing and her shoulders softened, relieved to have something to steady her. She gazed trance-like at the deep blue water for a long time, until the sudden reality of her past crashed up against her heart like the waves against the rocky cliff below.

  Warm salty air filled her lungs as she inhaled deeply. Her life would be different now. She couldn’t keep the memory of her daughter locked away any longer. Sylvia’s baby was all grown up, and she was right here in Tarrin’s Bay, where it all began.

  A brief melodic sound startled her. It was a reminder message on her phone.

  Damn! She’d forgotten about dinner with Richard! It was seven-thirty already, and he’d be arriving any minute. She let go of the railing and ran down the hill, trying to send a text message at the same time. What should have been ‘running late, almost there’ turned into ‘summing kate, bumost tgere’. Hopefully he’d know what she meant.

  The last thing Sylvia felt like doing now was cooking, and she didn’t want to waste any time with Richard so she picked up a couple of ready-to-go containers of food from the Thai restaurant opposite the park. That and a bottle of wine should be sufficient. She hoped Richard wouldn’t mind the last-minute dinner change.