by J. Nathan
That was all the approval I needed. My lips sealed over hers. They were soft and inviting, just as I’d imagined they’d be. I sucked her bottom lip into my mouth. It was minty like she’d just brushed. I set the pace, eager yet steady. I tried not to get ahead of myself, knowing—whether I wanted to admit it or not—this had been a long time coming. But Finlay seemed more than willing to keep up. Her arms slipped around my back, her splayed hands holding me to her.
Encouraged by her fervor, I moved to her top lip, equally plump and sweet. She had no choice but to open for me. And when she did—when I knew she was all in—I devoured her mouth. No holds barred. This was pent up frustration coming to fruition. My tongue slid against hers. I couldn’t get close enough. Neither could she. Her chest arched into mine as she pulled me closer. I wasn’t the only one losing my mind. She was just as ready and willing. And the softness of her body beneath me was just about all I could handle. I wanted this. I wanted this with her.
I pulled back, my heavy breathing mirroring hers. She looked so willing beneath me. So ready for what I wanted to unleash on her. But I’d just broken it off with Leslie. What kind of dick would I be if I slept with Finlay? Granted I wanted to. But I wanted her to see everything between us was real, not some rebound thing. I squeezed my eyes tightly. Fuuuuuck.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, her voice hushed.
I reluctantly opened my eyes, instantly met with Finlay’s dazed gaze and flushed cheeks. Her chest rose and fell hard with each breath. Her shirt stretched tightly across her breasts, her pebbled nipples revealing just how into it she’d been. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. She watched me, waiting for me to speak. “I think you’re right.”
She stared up at me with the same rejected look she’d given me in the pool. Only this time she was pinned beneath me with no way of escaping.
I cursed under my breath. “I promise you. This is one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. But I think I should probably just hold you tonight.”
I watched the disbelief coast over her face. “Hold me?”
I bit down on my bottom lip to stop myself from taking back my words.
She blinked. “You’re serious?”
I nodded, feeling my resolve waning. “Can I do that? Can I just hold you tonight?”
Her eyes held a mix of amazement and disappointment. And after a long torturous pause, she nodded. “Yeah. I’d like that.”
I lay down beside her, wrapping her tiny body in my arms and pulling her front into my chest. “Trying to sleep is gonna be a lot harder now.”
Finlay’s laughter mixed with my own, somehow easing the awkwardness that existed now that I’d screeched on the brakes. “Yeah. I totally appreciate you being a gentleman and all, but maybe next time, give me some warning first.”
I smiled, leaning down and pressing my lips to her forehead. “Next time, I won’t be a gentleman.”
Finlay
I could not freaking believe Caden was the one to stop us. I was all in. No matter how fast things were moving, I was ready and willing and throwing caution to the wind. But as I lay there in his arms, feeling so at home, I realized that rushing made no sense. If it was meant to happen, then we had plenty of time to explore each other that way.
“So do you know about all football or just Alabama?” Caden asked, his arms tightening slightly around me.
I shrugged. “Mostly Alabama.” It was crazy how comfortable I felt with him with each passing minute. It was like, as soon as I decided to let him in, there was no longer anything stopping me. Not my past feelings for him. Not the notion that he’d had a girlfriend. Not my guilt for betraying Cole.
“How much do you know?” he asked.
“I don’t know. Try me.”
Caden’s voice lowered to a sexy tenor as his fingertips skated up my back. “Oh, I intend to. Very soon.”
A tremor moved through my already roused body.
“How many national titles do we have?” he asked.
“Sixteen.”
He paused, likely considering a harder question. “How many number one draft picks have we had?”
I thought back to the trivia games my dad played with Cole. Some families played Candy Land. We played Alabama sports trivia. “One. Gilmer in the late forties.”
He growled, annoyed with the depth of my knowledge. “Most famous player to come from Alabama?”
“Joe Namath.”
“Wrong.” He sounded pleased. “Julio Jones.”
I tilted my head up so I could see his face. “You said famous. The guy was super famous and right behind Bart Starr for best QB.”
“Yeah, but just think how great I’d look with Julio as one of my receivers.”
I laughed, loving the connection we were forging in such a short period of time.
“How many Heisman winners have we had?” he asked.
“Two. Ingram and Henry. And coincidentally, they share the record for most rushing touchdowns—in case that was your next question.”
Caden rolled me unexpectedly onto my back and covered me with his body. He grinned down at me. “You knowing all this stuff has me so horny, there’s nothing left to do but get you naked or put a ring on your finger.”
I laughed. “You’re so stupid.”
His smile faded, as if he suddenly remembered something. “Why’d Coach tell me to go easy on you?”
My eyes widened. “What?”
“When I called to tell him you were coming with me, he warned me to go easy on you and treat you right.”
My chest tightened. My heart raced. Could I be honest with him? Could I talk about Cole? Could I drudge up something painful when I was feeling so happy? “I don’t know.” Liar. “He knows my parents. He was nice enough to offer me the job.”
“Thank God he did,” Caden said as he framed my cheeks with his big hands and dropped his lips to mine, having his way with my mouth once again.
There was no coming back from a night spent with Caden. Regardless of how innocent it turned out to be. My feelings were all over the map when it came to him. They couldn’t be trusted. He made me feel things I’d never felt before. Things I wasn’t sure I’d feel again. But that’s why it was so scary. Because if he made my head feel so out of control, what would he do to my heart?
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Finlay
“Do me a favor and don’t become some crazy stalker,” I warned Caden as he parked in front of my dorm, insisting on driving the final leg of our trip.
He turned to me with a grin. “Chances are I will. You have that effect on me.”
“Well, just don’t show up late at night looking to get busy.”
He threw back his head and his laughter filled the rental car.
“I’m serious,” I said with a straight face. “I may be entertaining another guy. Or worse, I have a roommate who’ll not only stay for the action, but’ll ask to join in.”
The idea froze his features. “Are you kidding?”
My brows slanted. “She’s got the no-filter thing you’ve got going on, so she’d definitely ask. But it’s never happening.”
He leaned toward me with quirked lips. “Well that’s good. Because you’re definitely all I can handle.” He pressed his lips to mine, the kiss going straight to my knees. Even with students passing by on their way home from their Monday afternoon classes—the ones we missed, Caden had no intention of stopping, clutching my cheeks and holding me to him.
I could feel myself falling. Falling hard. And it scared the hell out of me. One of us had to stop before things got too intense right there for all to see. So I grabbed the door handle and pulled back from him, leaving us both dragging air into our lungs as if starved for it. “I’ve got to get inside.”
“That’s what I’m thinking,” he said with a devilish grin that did crazy things to my insides.
“Can you turn anything I say into something dirty?”
He considered my question. “Is that a challenge or a question?”
&nb
sp; I rolled my eyes, which just brought out a bigger smile. I wished I could smile too, but the thought that we’d be heading back to the real world made me uneasy. I didn’t want to act like I expected anything from him now that our road trip had ended. I wouldn’t be that girl. “So…I guess I’ll see you at practice tomorrow.” I tried to step out of the car, but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me back in.
He stared me down, looking more pissed than I’d seen him with Grady. “Yes, you’ll see me at practice tomorrow. But you’ll see me tonight because you’re staying at my place.”
The tenseness I’d felt just seconds before disappeared. “Is that a challenge or a question?”
He laughed. “That’s me asking you to stay with me tonight.”
I gazed into his eyes, feeling myself going over that cliff. That point of no return. “Is this moving too fast?”
“For who?”
I appreciated his attempt to ease my mind, but I still felt like it was happening too quickly.
“Finlay, the only people who matter are us. And do you care?”
I shook my head.
A smile slid across his face. “And I sure as fuck don’t care.”
I shook my head at his consummate honesty. “What time?”
He pulled in a deep breath. “I’ve gotta talk to Leslie first. I’ve gotta make it clear that it’s over.”
I nodded. And there it was. The sign that it was too quick. Sadly, I felt completely powerless because I liked how I felt around him. I liked how he opened up to me. I liked how we just fit.
“I’ll call you once I talk to her.”
I nodded again, stepping out of the car and opening the back door to grab my bag.
“Hey?” Caden looked over the front seat.
My eyes met his.
“Everything’s gonna be fine. We’re gonna be fine.”
I smiled and for some reason, I believed him.
Caden
I hobbled up the front walkway of Leslie’s sorority house. I’d tried her cell but my call went right to voicemail. I wasn’t about to let her ignore me, especially after she’d called and left messages for me all night. A face-to-face sit down would put an end to it.
A rock held the front door ajar, so I pulled it open and stepped inside the front foyer like I had so many times before. This time I felt like an intruder. It wasn’t my life anymore. I wasn’t the sorority president’s boyfriend. I wondered if the sisters knew that. Had she cried to them or maintained that we weren’t actually over? Leslie was stubborn, and this was one fight she seemed dead set on winning.
I passed a few girls on my way down the carpeted hallway toward Leslie’s corner room. They said hello, eyeing my crutches sadly. Did they pity me? Did they think my football career was over? I wanted to assure them I was fine, but why bother? Actions spoke louder than words. And me back on the field for our first home game would be proof enough.
I stopped in front of Leslie’s closed door, sucking in a deep breath and hoping like hell this didn’t go worse than our phone call. I tapped on the door and waited. Normally, I just walked inside, but I needed to draw a line. I needed her to see that wasn’t our relationship anymore. I didn’t want to be enemies, but I also didn’t want to date her. I tapped again.
“She’s not here.”
I glanced over my shoulder at a girl who looked a lot like Leslie. Most of the girls in the sorority looked pretty similar to Leslie, all blonde, tall, and skinny.
“Where is she?”
“She went home. Said she had some personal stuff to deal with.”
Part of me hurt for Leslie. What I’d done came out of left field. I was careless with her feelings, thinking I was doing the right thing. I didn’t blame her for running to find solace in a place she felt safe. “She’s not answering her cell. Could you let her know I stopped by?”
“Sure.”
I turned on my crutches and made my way out of the sorority house. I had the urge to head back to Finlay’s, but decided to get settled at home so I could try Leslie’s cell again. She needed to know in no uncertain terms that it was over. She needed to know it wasn’t her fault and she’d done nothing wrong. Feelings were a fickle thing and she was simply a victim of circumstance.
Finlay
“You’re back,” Sabrina squealed, greeting me at the door of our room.
I closed the door behind me, the scent of her vanilla lotion feeling like home. “Feels like I’ve been gone forever.”
“You have. I missed you.”
Unexpected warmth spread through me. No one other than my parents had ever said they missed me before. And it felt nice to be missed.
“I want to hear all about Arkansas. I saw Brooks’ sack. Must’ve been awful up close.”
I swallowed down a guilty lump. She had no idea what happened between Caden and me—no one did. But the way she said “up close” brought back a barrage of images from the hotel room. Images I wouldn’t be shaking for a very long time. “I think it looked worse than it was.” I walked over to my desk and dropped my bag onto the chair.
“Did you hear he and Leslie broke up?”
I spun around. “How’d you hear that?”
“She stopped by.” Sabrina dropped down onto her bed. “She needed someone to vent to. Apparently there’s someone else.”
My forehead scrunched, my heart stuttering. “He told her that?”
Sabrina nodded. “She wanted me to ask you if anyone’s been hanging around practices. Or if he’s been with anyone on any of the road trips.”
My eyes expanded. “How would I know?”
She shrugged. “You’re around him. She thought maybe you’ve seen something.”
I shook my head. “No.” Even as the words left my lips, guilt consumed me. Guilt that I was lying to my roommate—my friend. And guilt that Leslie was hurt by Caden because of me.
Sabrina tilted her head, her eyes assessing my guilty face. “Finlay?” she asked hesitantly. “Are you the reason Caden broke up with Leslie?”
I gazed across the room at her, unsure what to say. I didn’t want her to think differently of me because I was well aware it looked bad. But I wanted to be truthful. She’d been good to me. She deserved my honesty. “It just kind of happened.”
Her eyes expanded. I braced myself for the backlash. For her to tell me I was a bitch. That she was ashamed of me. That she was disappointed in my poor judgment. But instead of anger or disappointment in her eyes, happiness brimmed as she jumped to her feet and rushed at me, nearly tackling me into a hug. “I’m so happy for you.”
“You are?” My words were muffled by her shoulder.
“Are you kidding?” She pulled back, looking me in the eyes. “I could tell she wasn’t hanging around me for me. I could tell she had other motives. Like she was milking me for information.” She stepped back and crossed her arms. “So, Caden Brooks?”
I laughed. “I swear. It just happened.”
“Uh, huh.” She didn’t believe me. Hell, I didn’t believe me. Something had been happening between us for weeks.
“Have you kissed him yet?”
My eyes flashed away.
Her eyes nearly bugged out of her head, realization hitting her. “Did you do more than kiss him?”
I walked to my bed and dropped down onto it, purposely averting my gaze. “Let’s just say, it came extremely close to going there.”
“Don’t you do that to me, Finlay Thatcher.” She rushed to my side, dropping down on my bed beside me. “You can’t say that and nothing else. I need this. I need to live vicariously through you on this one.”
I clearly wasn’t one to divulge my personal business readily, but the hopeful look in her eyes made it impossible to remain tight-lipped, especially given how excited she was for me. The images flooded my brain. His scent still clung to my clothes. My lips still tingled from his kiss. “He’s an amazing kisser.”
Her shoulders dropped. “So you’re staying quiet? I respect that. But I can tell. Someth
ing happened. And whether or not you two got busy, something happened.”
A full-blown laugh burst out of me as I fell onto my back. “I knew I wasn’t the only one who said that.”
She fell back beside me, both of us staring up at the ceiling. “I’m so happy for you. You deserve to have something amazing happen to you.”
“Thanks.” She couldn’t possibly know the appreciation that small word held. She had become someone I trusted. Someone I was lucky to have in my life. Someone I could obviously depend on.
My phone pinged in my pocket. I pulled it out. The photo of Caden and me in front of Elvis filled the screen. The text beneath it read: I miss my accomplice. Come over.
A ripple rolled through my belly. I hadn’t seen the picture of us together until that moment. We looked good together. The notion hit me fast and hard. He wanted me. Just me. In the photo I could almost see it. His eyes were soft, his smile was genuine, and the way he leaned into me was natural. Like that moment in time was how it was supposed to be. We looked happy. We were happy. And that notion felt so damn good.
“He’s so hot,” Sabrina said, looking at the picture. “Am I allowed to say that now that you two are a thing?”
I laughed. “You better. Don’t want him losing that edge.”
She laughed. “Why didn’t he come in?”
“He needed to talk to Leslie.”
Sabrina turned on her side, her head resting in her hand. “Good luck with that conversation. The girl’s a pit bull.”
I laughed. “Yeah. He said she wasn’t letting him break up with her.”
“Sounds about right.”
We lay there for a long time. And for the first time in a very long time I felt content. Felt as though I’d found my place. Found people to rely on. Found something to look forward to each day. It had been a long time coming, but I actually saw a future with me happy. “Caden took Cole’s position on the football team,” I divulged.
“I didn’t know that.”
I shrugged. “You wouldn’t. Caden doesn’t even know.”
“Are you planning to tell him?”
I nodded. “The time just hasn’t seemed right.”