Nuptials for Sale

by Virginia Jewel

  “Wait! What?”

  I sat up and shouted into my phone.

  Someone from another cubicle shushed me and Bobby, the nosiest person in our office, stuck her head out from around her cubicle to stare at me.

  I lowered myself in my seat and leaned closer to my desk so that my face couldn’t be seen.

  “I saw Josh proposing to you on the news, and I must say that I am extremely disappointed that you didn’t even bother to call me and your father to share the good news.” Her voice had changed from anger to disappointment.

  Normally I would have preferred the anger, but I was too busy wrapping my mind around what she had said.

  “Hold on. Can you explain to me again exactly what you saw on the news?” I had lowered my voice, but it still had an air of panic.

  She groaned, but obliged. “You know how at the end of the news they always show a feel good story?”

  I tried to hide my increasing frustration and impatience, “Yes.”

  “Well today they showed a video that they said was a virus hit.”

  “You mean viral, not virus.”

  “Right, viral. Anyway, they showed a heartwarming video that someone had captured on their cell phone. It was a young man proposing to his girlfriend in a SuperMart of all places. It really was cute, but then they zoomed in on the people and there you were! I couldn’t believe it! Josh was spinning you around and people were cheering.”

  “Someone caught that on camera?” I scanned my memory of that night for cameras or phones, but couldn’t picture any.

  “So it was you?” the disappointed tone in her voice was back. “Why wouldn’t you call us and tell us? The news said that the video had been seen over a million times, and yet, your own mother didn’t know about it. It’s not as if it’s a big surprise. We always thought you and Josh would make a great couple, but we always assumed you’d tell us when it finally happened.”

  My fingers were typing keywords into a search engine as she tried her hardest to lay a guilt trip on me. SuperMart proposal gave me over a thousand hits, but the most popular one was our video.

  “Mom, I’ve got to go. I’ll call you later.” I hung up and shut off my phone before she had the chance to argue with me.

  I clicked on the video and watched in horror as Josh’s joke proposal was broadcast across the internet. My eyes panned down the page to the comments listed.

  An hour later, I was still reading the comments when my office phone rang.

  “Hello, Mel Holden, how can I help you?” I spit out my usual robotic greeting without looking away from the screen.

  “Trip?”

  I leaned down closer to my desk and whispered into the receiver, “Oh my God, Josh. Have you seen it?”

  “Yes. Some girl at work showed it to me. How are you handling this?” Josh sounded concerned.

  “I don’t think anyone at work has seen it yet, or at least they haven’t said anything to me. Josh, this thing is huge. It’s got over a million hits and counting. There’s no way we can keep this a secret from everyone.”

  “I know. I just got off the phone with your mom.”

  I mimicked beating my head against my desk, “She called you too?”

  “Yes, she’s quite upset with us.” He said the last part in a perfect imitation of my mom’s voice. “She’s ecstatic, but still upset.”

  I rolled my eyes and groaned, “She already called me. That’s how I found out about it.”

  Josh laughed at me.

  “Don’t laugh! You’re just as much in this as I am.”

  “I know, but there’s nothing we can do about it now. I’ll stop and pick up some Chinese for dinner and we’ll figure out a way to get out of this.”

  I could tell he was still smiling, though he’d at least put effort into not laughing anymore.

  “Fine, but I’m telling you right now, you’re going to have to be the one to tell her that we’re not really getting married. There is no way I’m doing it.”

  “Sweetheart, just come home and we’ll talk about all the details for the wedding then,” he said it sweetly and then followed it up with kissing noises into the phone.

  “You’re an ass, you know that!” I said with a smile.

  I thought I was going to make a clean break from work, but with ten minutes left in the day an e-mail message popped up in my inbox. The subject line said it all, “I wonder where they’ll register?”

  Shit! I thought to myself and clicked the message open. Sure enough, there was the link to my video. The message had been forwarded to everyone in the office and I could actually hear the video playing from several cubicles around me. Giggles, chuckles, and a few loud roars filled the office as people realized exactly what they were watching.

  I shook my head and shut my computer off. I grabbed my purse and headed for the elevator. My foot tapped impatiently as I waited for the doors to open.

  “Congratulations, Mel.”

  I turned to see Bobby smiling at me.

  I smiled back at her but couldn’t bring myself to speak.

  The doors to the elevator opened up and I threw myself in before Bobby could say anything else.

  True to his word, when I got home dinner was on the table. There was also a bottle of wine, a beer, and two lit candles.

  “I figured we could have a nice candle-lit dinner to celebrate the fact that our engagement has gone public.” Josh said as he came sweeping into the dining room from the kitchen. He had a wine glass and two forks in his hands.

  I gave him a disapproving look. “Part of me is starting to think that you’re enjoying this.”

  “Why wouldn’t I be? This has got to be my best prank ever, right?” his face was beaming with pride.

  “Yes, well, your mom is not calling you excited about the prospect of having a married daughter. We have to tell her soon before she starts asking when we are going to give her a grandchild.” I dished out Lo Mein as he poured wine into my glass.

  He laughed dryly, “You’re right, ‘cause if my mom starts calling, we’ve got bigger problems than explaining this prank.”

  My face fell and I felt awful. “I’m sorry Josh. I didn’t mean to be insensitive.”

  Josh’s mom passed away our freshman year at State. He’d taken it pretty hard. For the first few months afterwards, he’d stuck pretty close to me. Without meaning to, I’d put my foot in my mouth.

  He gave me a small smile to let me off the hook.

  “No worries,” he held up his beer and I picked up my wine glass, “Here’s to figuring it all out.”

  We clinked glasses and started dinner.

  “Any ideas on how to handle this?” I asked between bites.

  “I was thinking,” he started but the house phone rang and he jumped up to get it. “Hold that thought for me.”

  I took a few more bites while Josh was on the phone in the living room. I couldn’t make out what he was saying, but sensed something unusual in the tone he was using. He was using his business voice, the same one he used when his boss called him.

  I listened half-heartedly as Josh talked to the mystery caller. He seemed to be using “uh-huh” and “okay” a lot. Hopefully he wasn’t getting fussed at, or worse, fired. He was definitely having a serious discussion. After ten minutes, he hung up the phone.

  “Was that your boss? Do you have to work this weekend?” I asked him when he came back to the table, phone off, but still in his hand. His face was white and his eyes were glassy.

  “No.”

  “Was it my dad?” A moment of panic hit me at the thought of my father calling Josh. Sure, my mom said they liked Josh and were happy for us, but maybe my dad saw it differently and wanted to have a heart-to-heart with his future son-in-law

  “No.”

  “Thank goodness,” I sighed. “Who was it then?”

  “It was a producer from Wake up America.”

  “What? Why would a producer from Wake up America call you?” I laughed at his weak attempt at a joke.
He was usually so much better than that.

  He turned to me with a panicked look.

  “They want us on the show. They played the video on the show this morning and someone tracked us down. They want to fly us out to New York for the show on Monday morning.”

  “Stop joking around, Josh. Who was really on the phone?” I laughed at him again, but there was definitely something growing in the pit of my stomach.

  “I’m not joking, Mel. He said that they played the video because it was such a viral sensation, and that they’ve had several hundred calls about it since it aired this morning.” He reached for his beer and took a long swig.

  I stared at him, trying to will him into bursting with laughter. Surely he was joking around with me.

  “He’s going to call me back this weekend with our flight and hotel information.” Josh said after he put his beer down.

  “You told him we’d come on the show?” I asked incredulously.

  He seemed to come alive. He threw his hands up and stared at me, “I didn’t know what to say. He caught me by surprise. I said yes before I had even really processed what he was asking me.”

  “Josh, we can’t go on national television and tell everyone it was just a joke.” I could feel my heart racing. A panic attack was building inside me.

  He nodded.

  “We can’t go on national television and pretend to be engaged either!”

  He nodded again.

  “How are we going to get out of this, Josh?” My body temperature was rising. I put my fork down and started fanning myself.

  “I don’t know.” He shook his head back and forth. “I don’t think we can.”

  “This is so much worse than having to tell my mom.”

  “I know.”

  We finished dinner in silence. After we ate, I loaded the dirty dishes in the dishwasher as Josh headed to the living room. My panic attack and settled, but the pit in my stomach was still there. I thought about it the whole time I cleaned up from dinner.

  When I was done I headed into the living room. I expected to find him playing video games, but instead he was just sitting on the couch. He hadn’t even bothered to turn the television on. I grabbed the remote from the coffee table and turned the television on. I flipped through the channels, looking for something to take my mind off the disaster that my life had become.

  I stopped on a national news network, feeling confident that the nation’s political state was far more important than our little story.

  After ten minutes, and following a story about the war, the newscaster shifted gears and spoke with a smile. “Coming up after the break, is the heartwarming video of a man proposing to his girlfriend at SuperMart.”

  We both sat motionless staring at the television. After what felt like forever, the story finally came on. I watched as the video of our fake proposal played on the national news. When the video was over, the newscaster said with a smile, “What a cute couple! I hope it all works out for them!”

  I looked over at Josh and turned the television off.

  “I’ve been thinking,” Josh looked at me and flashed a mischievous smile.

  4.

  “You’re on in three minutes.” The producer gave us a thumbs-up sign and walked away. Josh returned thumbs-up and smiled.

  “I think I’m going to be sick,” I moaned and closed my eyes.

  “Relax and enjoy this. I’ve got the whole thing planned out. All you have to do is smile and look pretty.” He rubbed my back gently.

  Josh had spent the whole weekend running through the plan with me. He was charismatic enough to pull it off, and I could just pretend to be nervous about the cameras. It all sounded easy when we were sitting in our apartment, but as soon as we’d stepped foot on the plane my nerves had kicked in. I was really starting to doubt whether or not I could even pull of smiling and looking pretty.

  “I know the plan, Josh. I’m just worried about afterwards. We still have to go home and face our families, friends, and coworkers.” I started rocking back and forth with nervousness. My stomach was churning and I’d already sweated off three make-up applications. The girl who’d done my make-up gave me a stern look as I looked nervously around the studio.

  “We talked about this, Trip. We’ll pretend to be engaged for a month or so and then tell everyone we called it off, but we’re going to remain friends.” Josh pulled me in for a hug.

  “I’m just worried, that’s all.” I said into his shoulder. Josh had a way with me. He was the only person who could make me feel better with just a hug, smile, or comforting word.

  I felt a little better, but was still nervous.

  “Just trust me Trip. I’ll take care of you.” He rubbed my back some more. “You do look pretty today, you know.”

  He smiled sweetly at me and I felt a little of the nervousness disappear.

  “Thanks.”

  “Okay, you two, let’s head towards the studio.” The producer was back and pulling us towards the cameras.

  We were seated on a couch in another part of the studio from where the other segments had been filmed. My heart was pounding and I could feel sweat beading on my forehead again. Josh was cool as a cucumber, but rubbing my hand reassuringly.

  As soon as they went to commercial, the host, our interviewer, came over to greet us. My nerves overpowered me and I could barely form the words to speak. Josh was friendly and joked around with the host. They talked and laughed all through the commercial break, while I just sat there in a daze.

  “Welcome back! By now, I’m sure you’ve all seen the video. Customers in a Virginia SuperMart got more than a bargain as they shopped late one night. A normal night at the store turned into a scene from a romantic movie as a young man took control of the PA system and surprised his girlfriend with an impromptu proposal.” He smiled at the camera as the video played on the monitors.

  I wasn’t sure if we were still on camera so I sat nervously with a fake smile plastered on my face.

  When the video ended, the host smiled at the camera again.

  “Here with me now is that couple, Josh Matthews and Melody Holden. Josh, Mel, welcome to Wake up America.”

  I smiled and nodded.

  Josh squeezed my hand and spoke, “Thank you Kevin. It’s a pleasure to be here.”

  “So, Josh, we’re all dying to know your side of the story. Did you plan this or was it truly a spur of the moment thing?” Kevin, the host, asked with a smile.

  “It was completely spontaneous. I don’t think I even knew what I was going to do when I grabbed the phone, but once I started, it all just felt right.” Josh said with complete ease.

  “So, what made you decide to do it?” Kevin asked.

  “We had so much fun that night and I was waiting for her to meet me in the front of the store,” Josh turned to look at me, “and I thought ‘I just had the best night of my life running around SuperMart doing nothing. This is the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with.’ So I asked her.”

  Several people behind the camera sighed admiringly at Josh’s performance. I tried my best not to laugh.

  “So Mel, were you surprised that Josh was proposing to you?” Kevin asked me.

  “Definitely,” I answered easily.

  “What were you more surprised about, the fact that he was proposing or that he was proposing at a SuperMart?” he asked me with a laugh.

  “The location was surprising, but it couldn’t top the fact that he was proposing.”

  “You two have known each other for awhile, correct?”

  “Yes. Trip and I met in high school and we’ve been friends ever since.” Josh answered.

  “Trip? Is that a nickname that you have for Mel?” Kevin looked to me. I could feel my cheeks blush.

  “That’s how we met. She tripped down the stairs on her first day at our school and I tried to make her feel better.” Josh winked at me.

  Everyone in the studio laughed.

  “When did the friendship turn into a ro
mantic relationship?”

  Kevin looked at me, but I froze.

  Josh stepped in and saved me. “About a year ago, Trip got out of a relationship and moved into my apartment with me. A few months later, we just started talking and realized that we would make a great couple. Now look at us!”

  Another round of sighs came from the other side of the camera.

  “Times are tough for you two, financially, right now, right?” Kevin asked us both. He smiled at me then turned back to Josh, “In the video you said, ‘We may not have much money, and I can’t give you a ring right now’, is that still true?”

  “We’re both working, but with student loans and the economy being the way it is, we pretty much live month to month. But like most people out there, we make it work.” Josh squeezed my hand again.

  Kevin smiled widely, “Well, I have a surprise for the two of you. The people over at SuperMart got wind of your story and have something for you.”

  A man in an expensive looking suit stepped out from behind the camera and walked towards us.

  “This is Nathan Gregory, an executive with SuperMart.” Kevin introduced us to the suit.

  “Josh and Melody, SuperMart is happy to have been a part of this memorable moment in your lives. As a token of our appreciation, we’d like to offer you this ring.” He handed Josh a box.

  Josh opened the box and his eyes widened.

  “I think that now that you’ve got the ring, maybe you should ask her that important question again.” Kevin laughed and gave me a wink.

  Josh and I made eye contact, and for a moment, I thought we’d been caught. Josh gave me a little wink then dropped to one knee.

  “Trip, you’re the girl of my dreams. You’ve already said it once, but now I’ve got a ring for you. Mel, will you marry me?” Josh knew the cameras were on him, so he didn’t make a face, but I could see the twinkle of mischief in his eyes.

  I simply couldn’t find words to answer him, so instead I just nodded.

  Josh slipped the diamond ring on my finger as everyone on the set clapped loudly. Josh stood up and pulled me into an embrace.

  “Let’s make this a good one for the cameras,” he whispered and then pushed his lips against mine.