by Nella Tyler
As soon as I was ready, I headed into town, trying to find my way to the bar we normally met up at. It was a little hole-in-the-wall dive with the best burgers in three counties, according to one of the newspapers. Just then, burgers and beer sounded like the best possible thing in the world to me.
I wondered what Autumn was doing with her friends—was she getting the manicure she had talked about, or had she gone shopping? It was too early for her to have gone home, at least I thought so, but I had no idea what she might actually be doing.
Since I was going to dinner with my buds, I thought it was possible she might have grabbed dinner with her friends, as well. I pictured her in my mind, seated at a table somewhere in the mall, at the food court, maybe having Chinese, or Chik-Fil-A, talking to her friends about Addie. If I’d been there, I told myself, I would just have been in the way of that. Even if she had invited me.
Stop thinking about her and focus on the night out. I pulled into the parking lot at Dave’s Last Resort and spotted Drake’s beat up old car already parked in one corner. We were a bit before the dinner rush, which was good; we’d have time for a couple of beers, maybe a couple of shots, and then we could head over to the laser tag place. I parked and walked around to the front of the building.
“Cade! Brother, it’s good to see you,” Skinny Pete said, as soon as I walked in.
“You, too, man,” I told him. He slapped my shoulder and led me over to the table.
“I hear you’ve been working out at Bob Nelson’s ranch,” Max said.
“All season,” I confirmed. A waitress came and I looked over the specials; there was a deal on Jameson with a beer back, and I ordered it, along with the bacon cheeseburger and fries. Drake had already ordered a basket of deep fried pickles and some mushroom caps for the table.
“I didn’t know they were hiring,” Joe said.
I shrugged. “I saw an ad in the paper and answered it. It’s been a pretty good gig. They might bring on someone else next year if I work out.”
“Autumn Nelson is easy on the eyes,” Skinny Pete pointed out.
“Ah, let’s not talk about her,” I told him. “I made a promise to Bob Nelson that I wouldn’t get distracted by his daughter. It was his condition for hiring me.”
“Good man,” Drake said, smiling slightly. “I’d do the same thing if I had a daughter who’d just had a kid less than a year before, with a guy who ran off on her—don’t want her heart getting broken again.”
I shook my head. “Come on, guys. No more talk about her. I want to spend the next five hours not thinking about the farm, or the farmer’s daughter. Just guy shit, beers, and laser tag. Okay?”
“We can talk about that fine waitress over there,” Max said, nodding in the direction of one of the other bar maids. I’d known her in high school—hell, I’d known almost everyone in town who was between the ages of twenty-five and thirty in high school—but I had to admit that Max wasn’t wrong.
“Not bad at all,” I agreed. “Heather Johnson. Man, it’s been ages since I saw her.”
We chatted about Heather for a while, and then my beer and shot came, and then the burgers. I put Autumn out of my mind and tried to focus on spending time with my friends.
I started to relax a little bit and got into the spirit of boys’ night. I told myself that I was going to enjoy laser tag, I was going to get just a little bit drunk, I was going to ogle pretty girls, and I was going to pretend like I didn’t have any feelings that would make my life complicated.
I knocked back my shot of whiskey and drank down a few gulps of beer. “I heard that they have a hot girl working at the laser tag place,” Max said.
“That sounds promising,” Skinny Pete told him.
I laughed. “Not like you’re going to ask for her number, anyway,” I pointed out.
“You might, though,” Drake said, pointing at me.
“Probably not.” I shrugged off the idea. “I’m focused on my work these days.”
“All work and no play makes Cade a dull boy,” Drake countered. “You should play the field. Get your rocks off while there’s still women interested in hooking up.”
I shook my head; it was going to definitely be a guys’ night, but I didn’t think I was going to have all that much luck getting Autumn out of my head.
Chapter Twenty Three
Autumn
I had been avoiding Tuck, or at least being alone with Tuck, ever since he’d come to my place on the property and accused me of trying to form some kind of bizarre conspiracy with Cade to keep Tuck from inheriting the farm from our dad one day.
Since Tuck seemed to be functioning just fine in every other sense, Mom had thought—and I’d agreed—that it was best to relieve some of the tension.
I shouldn’t have taken it so much to heart that Cade had apparently lost interest in me, especially since Tucker had had such bizarre ideas about Cade and me colluding together. But Cade didn’t know about the incident between me and my brother; therefore, there was no real reason for him to avoid me, other than lost interest.
I knew that I should be relieved at least as far as my relationship with my brother was concerned that I didn’t have anything anymore with Cade, but I couldn’t make myself feel good about it. I thought I deserved more than just Cade’s avoidance. I deserved to hear from him that he had simply lost interest.
Mom had decided to take over bringing the guys lunch and snacks out in the fields. I needed to avoid Tuck, and I didn’t want to see Cade, so she had been more than happy to do it for me, in exchange for me covering some of her usual chores around the farm. I still cooked dinner half the time, but I didn’t have to deal with either of the two men who were causing me so much trouble in my mind.
I stood outside hanging laundry, thinking about what I would do the next time that I had an opportunity to go into town just to amuse myself. Mom and Dad both had told me that it was a good practice. I came back from my little outings refreshed, more energetic, and more positive. I had to admit that I felt better after my dates with friends.
Maybe we could go to Andrews Park, I thought to myself. We can put together a picnic, hang out at the lake, maybe do a little sunbathing… It sounded nice; but it would have been nicer still if I could do it with Cade instead of my friends.
I shook off the thought. It wasn’t any use to think of how nice it would be to do something with Cade. I wasn’t going to be doing anything with Cade in the near future.
“Autumn.” I looked over the clothesline and saw Tuck walking towards me. My heart beat a little bit faster in my chest, but I made myself keep working. I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of knowing that I was still a bit shaken by his random attack on me.
“Hey, Tuck,” I said, straightening the sheet on the clothesline and grabbing pins out of the hanging bag on the rope. “Something up?” I swallowed against the tightness in my throat.
“I wanted to talk to you,” he said, stepping under the clothesline and coming to a stop a few feet away from me.
“About what?” I wiped my damp hands on my pants and crossed my arms over my chest.
“Stop looking at me like that, Sis,” he said, looking away from me. His cheeks were pink with more than just the sun.
“Like what?”
“Autumn.” He met my gaze and frowned. “Look, I know I was an asshole to you the other day.”
I raised an eyebrow at that. “The other day? Whatever are you talking about, brother?” I held his gaze until he looked away again.
“I shouldn’t have accused you of having some kind of scheme going with Cade,” he said, sounding more than a little sheepish. “I’m just…I guess…paranoid about what my future is going to look like, and I took it out on you.”
“Oh?” I kept my face neutral. “Refresh my memory if you would.”
“Autumn, don’t be like this,” Tucker said. “I’m trying to apologize to you.”
“So apologize,” I told him. He took a deep breath and exhaled slow
ly, closing his eyes and then opening them again.
“Okay,” he said. “I’m sorry I went off on you like that, especially because Addie was in the next room. I was an asshole and it was uncalled for.”
I finally let myself crack a smile. “Thank you,” I said. “I appreciate the apology. I accept it.” I shook my head and uncrossed my arms.
“Cade’s not a bad guy, you know,” Tuck said, kicking at the grass under his feet.
“I don’t know,” I told him. I turned back to the laundry basket on the ground and plucked a towel out of it to hang up.
“I mean, he’s a decent worker and seems mostly like a good guy,” he continued.
“I’m glad you and he are able to be friends again,” I said. “I just…” I shrugged. “I think I was mistaken.”
“Mistaken how?”
I glanced at my brother. “I thought he was interested in me,” I admitted. “There were some times, when we hung out... But he’s been avoiding me for the last couple of weeks. Even more than I’ve been avoiding you!” I gave my brother a little grin.
“So, you think he’s lost interest? Why would he?” Tuck frowned and shook his head. “There’s no reason why he should.”
“I figure it was just one of those things,” I told him. “He was into the hunt, not into me.”
Tuck kicked at the grass again. “I don’t know about that. I mean, he did promise Dad that he wouldn’t get involved with you, right? Maybe Dad noticed things were getting a little more hot and heavy between the two of you and had a word with him.”
I shrugged again. “Either way,” I said. “I probably should just let it go. Either he’s lost interest in me, or he isn’t going to be able to act on any interest he does have in me until after the season is over. Why should I wait around to see which answer it is, when I can just get on with my life?”
Tuck considered that, and I hung another towel and a few washcloths. “If you think you’ll be happier just letting it go, then you should do that,” Tuck told me. “Otherwise… I mean, I know you’ve got this incredibly active social life and all, but maybe you should give him the benefit of a few months to see if he’s just keeping away to keep his job or if he’s actually not interested in you.”
I looked at my brother doubtfully. “You know, I’m not sure whether you’re more annoying when you think I’m colluding with Cade to cut you out of your inheritance or when you’re trying to advocate for him,” I told my brother. Tuck laughed.
“I need to get back out there,” he said, coming in closer to me to give me a quick hug. “We’re okay, right?” I shrugged, but I paused in hanging up the laundry to let him hug me.
“I’m still annoyed at you, but I accept your apology,” I told him. “I’m mostly just glad you’re apparently not losing your mind.”
Tuck grinned. “Not yet, anyway,” he said, before pulling away from me and ducking back under the clothesline to head out to the fields. I shook my head to myself and watched him until he disappeared into the tall, growing corn, beyond the fence that separated the yard from the acres of cultivated land.
I thought about what Tuck had said. He was right in the fact that I didn’t know for sure what reasons Cade had for suddenly not wanting to hang out with me, for avoiding me. I didn’t actually know for sure that he’d lost interest.
If I were a more patient woman, I might have been tempted to wait it out, and see what happened once Cade didn’t have a job riding on whether or not he dated me. Why did Dad even make that a condition in the first place? It’s so silly. It’s not like it would actually distract anyone all that much to be in love with me.
Even as I thought that, though, I realized that it would; after all, I was around all the time. For a lot of people, it would be distracting to work out in the fields, only yards away from the woman they were interested in.
But even after we’d had sex, I hadn’t noticed any sign of Cade losing focus on his work. When he was working, that was all he was doing, and when he’d been with me, that was all he was doing in those moments.
But I knew my dad. It wasn’t just that he was worried about Cade getting distracted from his work; he had given the farm hand that ultimatum because he was worried about me—about how vulnerable I was, and how lonely, and how much it would break my heart to fall for a guy only to be abandoned again. It was kind of him, but at the same time I couldn’t help but resent my own father, even if just a little bit, for trying to coddle me that way.
No matter the reason why Cade had given up and started avoiding me, I decided that it was best for me to do like I’d told my brother I would: let it go and move on with my life.
I had gotten my fill of bullshit from Titan, and I didn’t see any need to put myself through the ringer yet again for someone who might not even be interested in me.
If Cade tried to come onto me once again after the season was over, I’d have reason to believe that he’d only backed off because he didn’t want to lose his job. Then at least I’d have a choice as to whether that explanation satisfied me.
But if he’d lost interest in me, and I’d waited to find out from him that he had for sure, then I’d be wasting months of my life when I could possibly find someone I liked just as well, if not better than him. If Cade wanted me, really wanted me, then he would make an effort to convince me of that once he was free to once more; of course, by then it might be too late.
I finished up hanging the laundry out on the line, and told myself that if Cade came onto me once more after his contract with my dad had ended, I would decide how I felt about him and whether I was willing to try things with him, at that point—and no sooner. Maybe I’d meet someone in the meantime who hadn’t made such a promise to my dad. And if I did, it would just be Cade’s bad luck that I wasn’t available when he finally had a real, true chance at winning my heart.
But even as I thought that, I couldn’t help but think that I would really, truly prefer to know whether or not Cade had lost interest. Whether I should even hope that there might have been something more to what was between us than a one-night stand. I went back into the house and pushed the idea out of my head; there was no point in making myself miserable over someone who probably wasn’t even interested in me.
Chapter Twenty Four
Cade
“You staying for dinner tonight, Cade?” I looked up from the nozzle of the pesticide sprayer at the sound of Bob Nelson’s voice.
“I didn’t know that was on the agenda,” I told the farmer. He grinned.
“Well, I figured, it’s a Friday night,” he said. “I don’t know what Autumn’s making for dinner, but we’d love to have you.”
I thought about it; Bob seemed to be relaxing, finally. It looked like he didn’t have any real suspicions that I was doing anything inappropriate with his daughter, at least not anymore. Autumn was distancing herself as much from me as I was from her, and Tuck had calmed down on the aggressiveness.
“I’d love to stay for dinner. Thanks for inviting me.”
“Finish up this last row, and then come back to the house,” he instructed.
“Can do, boss,” I agreed. Bob turned away as I pumped the pesticide canister and loaded it onto the motorized cart that carried it. I continued along the rest of the row, spraying the soybeans down, thinking about the dinner to come.
I hadn’t had a bad dinner at the Nelson house since I’d started working for them; on top of that, it wasn’t as though I had anything planned for myself after work. It’d be as well to have dinner before heading home for the weekend.
I finished up and brought the pesticide cart back towards the house, stopping at the shed where Bob kept all the tools and machinery. I put the cart away, took off the jumpsuit I’d put on to keep the pesticide off of my clothes, and headed to the house itself. There was no sign of Autumn or her mother; Tuck had just finished up, by the sight of him. “You staying for dinner?”
“Your dad invited me,” I told him. “Who am I to turn down a free meal
?”
Mrs. Nelson came to the door and smiled at me. “You remember where to wash up?” I nodded. “Autumn is just finishing up dinner. You’ll have just enough time to get cleaned up.”
“Thanks,” I said, returning her smile. I went into the house and sniffed the air; it smelled familiar—and not all that appetizing. The meals I’d had at the Nelson house ever since I had started working for Bob had all been so good and most of them had been made by Autumn. I shook off the impression, reminding myself that there could be several reasons for the off smell, and went into the bathroom to clean up.
I washed my face and hands and neck, combed through my hair and pulled it back, and made sure I looked presentable. I didn’t want to look like I was trying too hard—didn’t want to set Bob on the alert again—but I also didn’t want to look like a total scrub when I sat down at the family dinner table.
“What are we having for dinner?” I stepped into the kitchen, and saw that Bob, Tuck, and Mrs. Nelson were already there; Bob had arrived just ahead of me, to ask Autumn.
“We’re having salmon croquettes, with peas and carrots,” Autumn announced.
I barely restrained myself from grimacing at the news. I had hated salmon croquettes ever since the first time my mom had made them for me—and I’d told Autumn as much during one of our conversations. There is no way that she made them by chance. I started to smile to myself.
“Is that a problem, Cade?”
“Not at all,” I replied. I smiled at Autumn; an unpleasant dinner wouldn’t kill me, and I wasn’t about to let anyone see that her little ploy had had any effect on me. I met her gaze and saw the challenging look in her eyes. “Sounds like a fine meal.”
I sat down at the table in my usual spot and listened to the rest of the Nelson family chatting as they put the food out and passed it around. Addie was looking more and more like a toddler every day. She was going to be one soon, and I thought—briefly, very privately, to myself—that it would be a shame indeed if Autumn had to deal with throwing her daughter a first birthday party without a father to share the responsibilities.