The Sandman: Book of Dreams

by Neil Gaiman

"Now, King Alexander had a most secret and important window in his Private Study--the most magical window in the entire palace, a window that only looked out, never in. When he sat and sipped his glass of bittersweet wine, he saw things through that window that no one else could see. And, best of all, since it was a window that only he knew about, and that worked in only one direction, he could watch without being seen. It was the darkest and best secret in all of the Palace of Oblong Crystals, and it belonged to him because he was the king. No one else could be trusted with such a powerful object."Queen Violetta had long since stopped coming into the Private Study--she had almost ceased coming into the palace at all, content to spend her days among her peonies and fuchsias, breathing the warm damp air of the Conservatory, or bundled up tight in the windy Farther Hedge Garden. And young Princess Jessica had not been in the room for many years, since it was the place where Alexander thought his deep kingly thoughts and was no place for children.

  "He stared into his special, private window, as he sometimes did, and looked at things as they truly were, for that was its greatest power and deepest secret. He saw that Violetta his queen did not care for him, that she was envious of his dreams, that she wished to make him an unimaginative creature of habit and routine as she was. He saw that his subjects did not respect him, that the gardeners snickered when the queen made jokes at his expense, that the footmen and butlers and maids and charwomen all scorned him, even as they stuffed their mouths with the fruits of his largesse.

  "As for the queen's mother, to whom he had given a gracious apartment right in the palace--well, the old woman's malice was palpable. She had tried to prevent her daughter from marrying him in the first place, and never lost an opportunity to speak glowingly (and falsely) of Violetta's dead father, holding him up as an example of what Alexander would never be.

  "Worst of all, he saw that his own child, the Princess Jessica, was becoming a diminutive version of her mother, the queen. For years she had loved to play games with him, to be lifted and spun in the air like a bird, her hair flying--but now she would not play, and spoke to him angrily when he tried to persuade her. She turned away from him when he tried to express his fatherly love. She rejected him, as Violetta rejected him.

  "His Princess Jessica was changing, drifting away from him across a widening sea, on a one-way voyage to a place where he could not go, the Country of Women.

  "King Alexander summoned up Jessica's image in his private window and watched her as she walked across the great palace dining room, a stuffed toy dangling from one hand, her hair an unbrushed tangle across her shoulders.

  "She spent more time talking to her teddy bear than she did talking with him. And was she not too old for such a childish toy? Certainly she was in many other ways already aping her mother in her headlong rush toward womanhood.

  "The king poured another glass of wine and thought on these, and other, things.

  "It was late in the afternoon when King Alexander awakened, his head misty, his feet cold. He had drunk a little more of the frostberry wine than he had intended, perhaps. His glass had fallen from his hand and lay in glittering shards on the floor of his study.

  "As he leaned forward to pick it up, he saw something pale flit across his mirror. Distracted, his hand folded too hastily around the broken stem of his wineglass. He cursed, sucked his fingers, and tasted blood, staring at the magical window.

  "Framed in the rectangular space was the young woman he had seen before, the one who so much resembled the Princess Jessica. She was bathing herself in one of the garden pools, surrounded by bobbing water lilies. The leaf-filtered afternoon sun made her skin seem glistening marble.

  "He stared at her pale shoulders and long white neck as she dipped her face to the water, and decided he had been wrong: in truth she bore only the faintest resemblance to Jessica. No, this beautiful young woman had none of that flinty look of Violetta's, the look that Jessica has already begun to assume, for all her young age.

  "She was like his daughter only in that he admired her, as he had once admired a younger, more tender Queen Violetta. She was like his daughter only in that if she looked at him, he felt sure it would be with respect and love, as Princess Jessica once had. But this graceful girl was untainted, grown full and ripe without souring.

  "The young woman stood, and water ran down her naked belly and thighs; small splash-circles spread, chasing the larger ripples of her rising. Her breasts were small, but womanly-full, her legs achingly long and slender. As the breeze touched her cold skin she shivered, and his heart seemed to expand with love--and with something bigger, something deeper, darker, and altogether richer.

  "Unthinkingly, he lifted his fingers toward her image in the window, then stopped in surprise. Blood was running down his hand and onto his wrist.

  "He paused as an idea came, a wild, willful idea. Blood, wine, solitude--he had all the makings of a powerful magic.

  "Something in him shriveled at the thought, but his eyes and heart were so full of the pale-skinned, naked girl before him that he swept the doubts away like cobwebs. Here was what he wanted, needed... deserved. A girl as beautiful as his wife when he met her, as innocent as his daughter had once been ... a woman-child who would truly love him.

  "He wiped his hand clean on his trouser leg, then allowed a fresh rill of blood to ooze from the cut along his finger. He reached out to the window and drew a four-sided figure around the girl as she stood in the lily-blanketed pool, penning her in a square of red smears. He drank from the bottle and felt the blood of the berries run down his throat and bathe his thirsty heart. He said words, secret words in his own secret language. What they meant was: 'You are mine. I have created you, and you are mine.'

  "The girl framed in the window looked up suddenly, shivering again, although she had almost finished drying herself."

  Mister George heard the end of the Kings story because Jessica read it to him out loud. It made him angry and he said some words Jessica did'nt know.

  Tipical littery wanna bee he said. No story ark. Everything turns into sell fubsest intro speckshin.

  Princess Jessica wrote that down in her jernal because she did'nt know the words and asked him what it meant. Mister George said that it did'nt matter, that style was not the real ishoo.

  We must do something, he told her. The beast is rising. We must do something soon.

  Jessica said that he was scaring her, and that anyway it was time to go watch Jeopardy with the Duchess.

  Leave it to me then Princess, said Mister George. I will do what I can.

  That night Jessica took her bath. All the My Little Ponys had fallen in because they were trying to cross the ocean on a Pony migrasion like Jessica saw on the television, except it was'nt ponys on TV but some kind of deers. One of the Ponys got behind her back, lost in the bubbles, and when she found it and turned around, the King of Glass was standing in the doorway. He looked at her for a long time until she said, Daddy go away I am having a bath.

  The King said O, so you are too big to have a bath with Daddy in the room and laughed, but it was'nt a nice laugh like he used to. He went to the cabinet and took out a bandaid and wrapped it around his finger. He had a kleenex there, and when he put the bandaid on he threw the kleenex in the toilet. It had blood on it, and this made Jessica more scared because she remembered the story.

  Wheres Mommy she asked.

  Who the F-word knows, the King said and laughed again. Jessica put her hand on her mouth because of the Fword, but she was mostly scared because she did'nt say it, her father did. Probably out rolling in the delfinnyums or something, he said. Who the F-word cares.

  I'll come back later and read you a story he said, then. He came to the edge of the bath and pulled her close and tight. The Ponys all fell in again off the slippery side. He patted her hair and kissed Princess Jessica's mouth. He had the closed door smell real bad and he was breathing loud.

  When he took his face away for a second J
essica said really fast I need to say something to Mommy. I have to tell her something about school.

  The King stood up and looked at her. His eyes were funny.

  I'll come tell you a story later he said and went out. The Queen of Flowers did'nt come until Princess Jessica was dried off and in her jammies. Ready for bed, thats a good girl, she said.

  Why does Daddy go in his room and close the door, the princess asked.

  The Queen sat on the bed. I guess he just needs some time to himself she said. Sometimes people need to be by themselves. He is working hard at his writing, you know.

  But he smells funny, when hes been in there Jessica said.

  Her mother did'nt say anything.

  Mister George thinks he might be turning into a monster said Jessica, like in that Werewolf in London movie. He might be changing into a bad thing from being in that room.

  The Queen laughed. Is that what Mister George thinks hah? Like in a monster movie, she said. Maybe Mister George should not watch movies like that.

  They talked some more but the Queen had to finish her winter garden plan, so she went back downstairs. Princess Jessica thought for a long time about how anyone could see her because of the Glass Castle but it was dark so she couldnt see out at who was watching. Jessica was afraid to fall asleep because she thought that if the King of Glass came to tell his story and she was'nt awake hed be mad, but she held Mister George really tight for a long time and then she got sleepy.

  Somebody was talking in her ear for a long time before she finally heard the words wake up Jessica wake up!

  She opened her eyes and Mister George was standing up on the end of the bed. Jessica was very surprised because he had never been able to move, only talk.

  Why are you moving, she asked.

  Get up Jessica, he said. We are going somewhere. We are going to do something.

  But I am not allowed to go out of the house at night said JMncess Jessica. She was scared to see Mister George walking on the end of the bed. He walked funny too, like his crooked leg was too short.

  We are not going out of the house, not really he said in his skwinchy voice and pointed to the closet. We are going there.

  Jessica stood up. Like the Lion and the Wardrobe she asked? She did'nt like to think about the Witch part.

  See S Loowis, said Mister George and made a grumpy noise. O, Father Seuss, spare me from alligory. Come on Jessica.

  She got up and wondered if her Mom and Dad were asleep or if they were awake. Sometimes they had fights all in wispers. She listened but couldn't hear anything. She followed Mister George to the dark closet. He went in it. She went in it too.

  But it was'nt a closet on the inside. There was fog and funny way far off noises and it went back a long way. This really is just like the Wardrobe she thought, and wondered if an alligory was anything like an alligator.

  After a minute they were in a narrow street. There was a very big round moon in the sky, all tho it was hard to see because there was fog. A bunch of houses were up and down the street, all close together all broken down and old and scary. They were dark except that some of them had yellow lights in the tiptop windows.

  I don't like this Jessica said. I want to go back.

  It is not a nice place, said Mister George but it is where we have to go. He was walking along in front of her just like a real person, except he was still himself, still very small and his ears were still ragged. It is Rats Alley.

  Now Jessica had to not think about alligories and rats both. But why do we have to come to this place she said, where is it?

  Rats Alley, I told you he said. But it is less a where than a what. It is where the shadoes of poetry and sin and sorrow over lap. It was my place once and it is the only path I know to find the Player King.

  Another King said Jessica, she did not understand the rest. Is he a friend of the King of Glass?

  He is a much more Important King, said Mister George. I hope he will be your friend.

  Something was crunching under Jessicas feet. It sounded like candy sticks but when she looked close she saw it was'nt.

  Did the alligories get them she asked really quiet, but Mister George did not say anything.

  Something came out of one of the dark doors and stepped in front of them. It looked like the Scarecrow of Oz, but it was'nt smiling. It had an even more skwinchy voice then Mister George like the rope hanging around its neck was too tight.

  Hello clubfoot, it said. It stood right in the way.

  We are seeking an oddyents with the Player King said Mister George. He was trying to be brave but he was very small.

  But you have no safe conduck, it said. Why should I let you pass? Its fingers made a creeky noise like the branches outside Jessicas window when it was windy.

  Mister George did'nt say anything for a long long time. Jessica wanted to run.

  For love of the moon, he said then. For memory. This one is young and still unmarked.

  And why should I not take her sweetness the scarecrow said and leaned forward to look at Princess Jessica. Its eyes were painted on and crooked. Perhaps that will make memory stop burning. Perhaps it will blacken the moon and I can forget.

  You are not here to forget ezra, said Mister George. We all travel here to remember.

  The scarecrow lifted its stick arms wide then stepped back into the shadoe. Go then it said. The voice was far off now. Go. Do not bring any more pieces of the living moon to trouble us in our ecksile.

  When they went past the door Jessica heard a sound like hissing. There was wet sawdust all over the ground.

  There were eyes and voices in other doorways, but Mister George only said quiet words to them and nothing came out. They went down the street as fast as they could but Mister Georges short legs and crooked walk made them go slower than Jessica wanted.

  At last they came to a door, and this one had light in it which made the fog glow in the street beside it. Over the door was a sign with a picture of a bird like a crow and letters that spelled THE BLACK QUILL.

  Mister George went inside and Princess Jessica followed him. A thin woman was just inside. She had a tray full of mugs and her eyes were all shadoey even tho they should not. My lord she said. Long time no see. She laughed then.

  I was sorry to hear about your eyes Miss Emily he said.

  A small loss for great sins she said. I never used them for the truest seeing, in any case. What brings you to visit us after so long.

  Tonight is the night of the rovers moon, he said. I have a patishun for the Player King.

  He is inside, she said. Watching the show. I will bring you a cup of our best red.

  I no longer drink it said Mister George.

  My you do take things seeriosly these days don't you, she said. Through there.

  Miss Emily went away wisling a slow song, and Princess Jessica and Mister George went down the hall to a big room full of candles. There were benches and tables but they had all been pushed back against the walls. There were lots of people in the room, or at least they looked like people even though some were the wrong shape and lots were wearing masks. Some of them were doing a play and some others were playing fluts and other insterments. The play was about a man who lost his wife and had to go sing for the gray king and queen who found her. Jessica looked at the gray king to see if he was the one Mister George wanted to talk to but he was wearing a big mask that covered his face and he had no arms, so she did not want to look at him any more.

  Or whats a heaven for, someone wispered in her ear. Jessica looked up. It was Miss Emily, who smiled again and said Poor Old Rob, then picked up some mugs and went away.

  The play stopped a moment later but no one clapped. They all looked toward where Mister George and Jessica stood then they all looked at the far wall. There was someone sitting in the shadoes against the wall who leaned forward. His hair was black and his skin was very white and he had little dots where his eyes should be like when the Duche
ss turns off the television. Jessica could tell he was a real King but she did not know what place he could be King of.

  A brief high ate us, then said the very white man. It will give the ladies time to don their claws. His voice was slow and hollow like talking in a big empty room. So you have come back to see the meenadds feed, young lord?

  I come with a patishun, my king, Mister George said, and took a crooked step toward him then got down on his knees. I have had my fill both of the rights of bockus and the claws of women.

  The Player King stood up and up and up. He was very tall and Mister George was so small and his ears were so tattery that Jessica wanted to cry for him. Speak then, the king said. What do you want here little house god.

  You know my special task my king said Mister George. This innocent is in danger. The one who threttens her calls upon your name to have his way. He trifuls with dream to justify his deed.

  The white king looked at Jessica for a long time until she felt all swirly. The princess did'nt understand anything that was going on. She was scared but she was also not scared. The tall man seemed to be too strong and quiet to be a really bad thing.

  I have heard him scratching in the walls of my dwelling the Player King said, but he has never been given admittens to my throne room. I have granted him no boon. Are you sure it is not the fact that he considers himself a poet that has offended you little hobbler?

  Mister George shook his head. That is of no import he said. I am sworn to redeem where I can, that is my sentence. He is her father. He calls on your name to cloke his deed.

  What would you have me do? No crime has been comited no promise breeched, said the tall white man.

  I implore you my lord, said Mister George. I was once your faithful servant tho my sins took me to another judge in the end.

  What you call sins have little to do with my kingdom, the Player King told him and raised his hand in the air.

  But everything to do with mine, Mister George said back very fast. And my duty. At least do not let him hide his deeds behind your mantel. At least make him see for himself what he does. There is some value still in innocents, is there not?