Remember Me (Men of Honor Series Book 1)

by Lara Van Hulzen

  “Yeah, Tess, he left you a stinking note to tell you he couldn’t marry you,” she reminded herself as she continued pacing. She thumbed her bottom lip, her thoughts a raging battle. Sure, he’d left her, but he didn’t leave her alone in the world with no idea who she was or a place to live or anyone to help. She was pretty sure no one would file a missing persons report. Ben’s parents were dead. He was an only child. When he left, he said he was going to take a leave of absence from work and travel through Europe, try to figure out what he wanted from life. No one knew where he was going. All of their friends were so mad at him they’d sided with Tess and didn’t care to find him. Even his best friend, Dane, didn’t know where Ben was.

  It was one thing to picture him gallivanting all over Europe, happy to be free of her. But he wasn’t. He was here in the next room, lost and alone. Deep in her heart, she’d always questioned his reason for leaving. The two of them were connected in a way she could never explain. Now he was here. Not in Europe. None of it made any sense.

  She buried her face in her hands.

  “What am I gonna do?”

  As if on cue, her cell phone vibrated in her back pocket. She took it out to see Emma’s big smile on her iPhone screen.

  “Emma! I’m so glad it’s you.”

  “Okaay. Wow, you sound cranked. Too much caffeine for your shift?”

  “No. Well, yes. But no.” She tripped over her words. Getting her thoughts from her brain to her mouth was proving impossible.

  “What’s going on? You were supposed to call me when you got off work so we could go shopping for the wedding.”

  Tess’s gut clenched at the word “wedding.” Emma was her closest friend and engaged to her neighbor, Mike. But helping Emma plan the wedding was tougher than she’d thought it would be.

  “I got caught up here at work. Emma, you’re never going to believe this but…Ben is here.”

  Emma sucked in a breath. “He’s where?”

  “He’s here at the hospital.”

  “Did he just show up and ask you to come back to him or something? Did that guy really think you would just forget all the heartache and pain and he’d waltz right back into your arms or—”

  “Emma! Listen.” Tess cut her off before she really got going. “No. It’s nothing like that. He was in a car accident and has amnesia. He doesn’t even remember his own name, let alone that he left me at the altar.”

  Silence.

  “Emma? Are you still there?”

  “Um, yeah. I’m here,” she whispered.

  “I know. It’s a lot to wrap your head around. I’ve been trying for the past few hours.”

  “How are you?”

  Her friend’s comforting words floated through the phone and warmed Tess’s heart. “I’m okay, for the moment. I’m functioning on all adrenaline at this point. The fact that he has no clue who I am is actually helping the situation. However, I don’t know what to do. The police officer from the scene of the accident just came and asked him a bunch of questions and said that since they don’t have any idea who he is, there’s nothing they can do. They’re leaving him stranded!”

  “Wow.”

  “That’s all you’ve got? I need some serious help here!” She turned sharp and paced another direction.

  “Hey, this is a lot to grasp. I’m just now finding all of this out from you.”

  Tess rubbed her eyes. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I’m…overwhelmed, to say the least.”

  “I bet you are. Man, of all the crazy things.”

  Tess heard someone talking in the background. “Is that Mike?”

  “Yeah. I’m at his place. We’re doing wedding stuff. Can I tell him?”

  “Yes, of course.” Tess listened to Emma’s muffled voice as she relayed the story to Mike. She heard his “No way!” and had to laugh. When she first moved from San Diego to her parents’ town house on the beach along the Central Coast, Mike introduced himself right away and they became fast friends. He invited her to church with him and Emma and they took Tess under their wing. The only people in her “new” life who knew her story, they were supportive, and the epitome of true friends.

  “Hey, Tess.”

  “Yeah, I’m here.”

  “Mike has an idea, but we want to make sure you’re okay with it.”

  “At this point, I would love any and all advice.”

  “He’s willing to have Ben stay here with him until you can figure out what to do.”

  Tess stopped pacing. How could they think that Ben living right next door to her could be a good idea? “Is Mike insane?”

  “Look, I know your brain is spinning right now over that plan, but hear him out.”

  She heard a shuffle as Emma handed the phone to Mike.

  “Hey, Tess.” Mike’s baritone voice came through the phone. She could see him in her mind, his surf shorts hanging low on his hips like always, with a Hurley T-shirt and flip-flops. His shoulder-length blond hair tucked behind his ears, he was a surfer who happened to also be a phenomenal pediatrician. Childlike himself, he lived to be in the water. He and Ben were a lot alike. “I know you probably aren’t too excited about this idea, but from what you’re saying, this poor guy’s completely alone in the world. Maybe being near the beach and near you will help him remember. I’ve never worked with anyone with amnesia, but I would imagine it’s better for people to come around on their own, suddenly or gradually, however it happens for them.”

  “But what if I don’t want him to remember, Mike? He left me a week before our wedding day. How am I supposed to forget that?”

  “I can only imagine how hard this must be for you, T, and I’m not saying you should forget. But I know you. There’s no way you’re going to walk away and leave him without anywhere to go.”

  She hated to admit it, but he was right. Her heart was damaged, but not completely gone. Her head said to hate Ben, her heart said something else; she just didn’t know what yet. A deep breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding in escaped her lungs. “Are you sure you’re willing to have some stranger stay with you?”

  “He’s not a stranger. I know plenty about him because of you.”

  She snorted out a laugh. “Yeah, and most of it me raging about what a jerk he is.”

  Mike chuckled. “True. But I know you. You never would have loved him if he were truly awful. Maybe you can get him to remember, and find out why he really left. Maybe there’s more to the story than you know.”

  Tess unclipped her hair and let it flow loose down her back. It still didn’t help relieve the headache building.

  “I think that’s what I’m afraid of the most.”

  “Look, I’ll head over to the hospital. I know the social worker well. I can talk to her, tell her I’m willing to claim responsibility for Ben and we’ll go from there. Sound good?”

  Tess nodded as if Mike could see her and squeaked out a “Sure.”

  “Listen, T. It’s going to be okay. Let’s just take this one step at a time.”

  ***

  Tess ended the call with Mike, tucked the phone to her chest, and thanked God for such good friends. Without Mike and Emma, she didn’t know what she would do. When Ben called off the wedding, Tess had packed up her things and moved to the beach. She wanted a fresh start away from the gossip and staring eyes of everyone who knew her before. Scared and alone, she’d met Mike and Emma. They made her feel safe.

  She’d told Mike she didn’t want Ben to remember. But was that true? Deep down, a part of her knew she wouldn’t have complete closure without knowing what really made him leave.

  “You still haven’t left?” Gwen’s voice from behind her brought her back to the present.

  She put her phone back in her pocket and attached her hair clip to the bottom of her scrub top. “Nope. I’m still here. The officer just left. He said we can release him when the social worker says so.”

  “Then what?”

  Tess looked toward the door of Ben’s room then back to
her boss. “My friend Mike said he can stay with him until something else comes up.”

  “You mean cutie Dr. Mike? That’s sure nice of him.”

  “Yeah. Mike’s the best.” Her mouth curved into a slight smile.

  “Okay. I’ll go talk to the doc and get his release papers going. When that’s done…I guess the hunky lumberjack is all yours.”

  A nervous laugh escaped Tess’s lips. “Hmm, yeah.”

  ***

  Tess peeked in Ben’s room, careful not to wake him if he was sleeping.

  To her surprise, he was sitting up in the chair next to the bed, wearing his jeans and boots, but no shirt. Her breath caught at the sight of him. Apparently backpacking through – wherever he’d been – had helped him keep the muscular physique he’d always been proud of. And that she’d always admired, especially when they went surfing. A few bandages peppered his chest. His red plaid shirt lay across the bed. When he heard Tess at the door, he stood.

  Goodness, she was going to need strength to get through this. His six-foot-two-inch frame made him almost a good foot taller than her. She fought hard to keep her eyes on his face. “What are you doing?”

  “From the looks of it, I’m putting on my clothes.” He grabbed his shirt from the bed, shrugged into it, and buttoned it as he spoke. “I don’t want anyone else in this hospital to see more of me than they already have.” He winked at her, but she could have sworn she saw his cheeks redden beneath his beard.

  “But…you haven’t been released yet.”

  “I will be. And I’m feeling fine. I can’t sit here anymore. I need to get out and try and figure out who I am.”

  She crossed her arms over her chest. He was the same old Ben. No problem taking on the world all by himself.

  “What will you do? Where will you go? You have no identification, no money and no idea where to start.

  He finished buttoning his shirt and sat down on the bed. “You have a point there.” The strong resolve that existed just moments before seemed to fade.

  Instinct told her to turn and run. Instead she moved toward him and said, “I have one option for you.”

  He lifted an eyebrow, grinning in a way that made her heart pound and her palms sweat.

  “My friend and neighbor, Mike, said he’s willing to give you a place to stay until you figure things out.”

  “Well, that’s awful nice of him, not knowing me from Adam.” His brow furrowed.

  She fidgeted with the bottom of her scrub top. “The police officer said you were on your own. I just told a friend your story and he offered to help, that’s all.” She shrugged, attempting to make it sound more casual than it was.

  He took her hand. An electric current shot through her. Her entire body flushed red. Curse her Norwegian skin. It was a tell all.

  “Thank you. I appreciate your friend’s generosity and you looking out for me. At the moment, you’re the only friend I have in the world.”

  She pulled her hand away. Him touching her and being nice wasn’t helping her decide if she hated him or wanted to wrap her arms around his neck and kiss him senseless.

  “I’m sorry, but do we know each other from somewhere? I keep getting this crazy feeling we’ve met before.”

  Tucking her hair behind her ear, she looked at the floor and then out the window – anywhere but in his eyes. She didn’t answer.

  “I’ll go see about getting your release papers. A social worker is coming by as well. She should be here soon.”

  She shot through the door and toward the nurses’ station, begging God to help her through this. What was she thinking? How could this possibly be a good idea? She couldn’t be in a room alone with him for five minutes, and now he was going to be living next door. Her mind spun like a Tilt-A-Whirl.

  “He’ll be with Mike more than me. I’ll hardly even see him,” she said to herself.

  “Who are you talking to?” Gwen asked as she came around the corner.

  “Ugh. Just myself. Sorry. Ignore me. I wish I could.” Tess rolled her eyes as her boss laughed.

  “That man sure has you flustered. I’ve never seen you like this.”

  “You have no idea.”

  ***

  Ben sat and thought about his conversation with Tess. She’d taken her hair down, a cascade of golden silk down her back. Her eyes had gone straight to his chest and then her cheeks turned red. Ben had sensed her discomfort, so he’d put his shirt on. Although a part of him had to admit it was nice to get that kind of reaction out of her. When he’d told her he was leaving and she’d crossed her arms and stood in front of the door, it took everything in him not to laugh. He could have easily thrown her over his shoulder and taken her right out the door with him. An enticing idea, for sure.

  He didn’t know what it was about Tess, but he couldn’t shake the idea he’d seen her somewhere before. When she said her friend was willing to give him a place to stay, his heart almost jumped out of his chest. He had grabbed her hand hoping to steady his own, only to feel a sense of coming home when his large hand engulfed hers. The instinct to never be away from her was at that moment so strong it had almost knocked him off the bed.

  The door to his room opened again and Tess came in carrying a file folder and a pen. She set the folder on the tray and opened it, shuffling through papers. Her eyes looked red from crying. Her hair was back up in a clip again.

  “You look tired.”

  She looked at him and forced a smile. “Yeah. I’m fine. I worked all night and was supposed to be off a few hours ago.”

  “You stayed because of me.”

  She looked down at the papers. A knock at the door kept her from answering.

  A woman in her fifties with a pleasant smile and calm demeanor entered the room. “Hi. I’m Janet.” She shook hands with Ben and Tess. “I’m the social worker assigned to your case. But it looks like you have a guardian angel looking out for you, since Dr. Mike here says he’ll claim responsibility.”

  She gestured to the man who’d come in the room right behind her, although he looked more like a surfer straight off the sand than a doctor.

  “Hey, T.” Mike nodded to Tess then shook hands with Ben. “Hi. I’m Mike, Tess’s friend. I spoke to Janet in the hallway, explained to her that I’m good with you crashing with me for a bit while we figure things out.” He winked at Tess.

  “About that,” Ben cut in. “Not that I’m not grateful or anything, but you’re really okay with this? I’m a perfect stranger.”

  Mike looked at Tess and back at Ben before answering. “Well, I’m a doctor, so helping people is kind of my thing. And I’m an optimist. I have a feeling you’ll remember things in no time.”

  Tess rolled her eyes.

  Janet chimed in. “Okay, then. Let’s get the paperwork done and we’ll leave you in Dr. Mike’s capable hands.”

  Ben took a deep breath. “Okay. But there’s just one problem. I don’t know my name. And I’m not too keen on going by John Doe.”

  He looked at Tess. “Why don’t you give me one?”

  She looked horrified at the idea, but he continued. “Something strong and brave, regal even.” He sat up straight and puffed out his chest as he winked at her.

  She laughed, and for a brief moment her eyes twinkled. His stomach did a weird flip, and he decided right then he would do anything it took to make her smile.

  She ran her thumb over her bottom lip and considered his offer. Her face softened and she said, “How about Ben?”

  “Hmmm. Ben. I like it.” He liked the way she said it too.

  “Ben it is.”

  Okay, then.” Tess looked at Mike then Ben. “Let’s get you home.”

  Chapter 3

  Tess mentally berated herself as she drove. “Let’s get you home.” What in the world made that come out of her mouth? When he’d told her to choose a name for him, she’d almost fallen over. She didn’t feel right giving him some made-up name, but she wasn’t sure if telling him his name was Ben would spark memorie
s or not. Was keeping the truth from him deceitful? Was Mike right that he needed to discover it on his own? That’s what she kept telling herself to feel better. Terrified of what might happen once he remembered, she suppressed her thoughts and tried to focus on the road.

  She had been able to talk to Mike in the parking lot briefly without Ben hearing. Mike had filled Janet in on the situation, made her aware that he knew Ben’s identity but wanted to wait and try and help him recover his memory on his own. Tess was grateful Janet was willing to keep things quiet and let Ben go in Mike’s care.

  “This is a really nice car.” Ben turned the seat heater on then off again and pushed the button for the reading light, obsessed with gadgets like a little kid. “I love the color.” He turned the light back off and looked at her.

  It had taken restraint not to laugh when he had to fold himself up to fit into the sports car when they’d left the hospital. She’d put the top down so his head at least had some room. Mike had driven Emma’s two-seater and it was jammed with wedding stuff so Ben had to ride with Tess.

  “Thanks. It was a wed… I mean… a gift from my parents.”

  To be honest, Tess’s heart had almost stopped when her dad pulled up in the Audi TTS Roadster intended as a wedding present. Ocean blue, her favorite color. After Ben left, her dad said he would return it if it was too painful a reminder. But it became a symbol for her of a new life and a new start. She’d taken off in it and never looked back. Well, she’d tried anyway. Her memories, and now Ben himself, seemed to find her.

  “That’s nice of them.”

  She caught a note of sarcasm in his voice.

  “Hey, just because my parents have money doesn’t mean I’m a spoiled rich kid. I’ll have you know I worked my butt off in school, had full ride academic scholarships, and was taught a strong work ethic. My father didn’t get where he is today by sitting on his hands.”

  He held up both hands in defense, laughing. “Okay, okay. I didn’t say anything. So your family has money. Who cares?”