Alias Smith & Jones: The Story of Two Pretty Good Bad Men

by Sandra K. Sagala

Wheelwright is about to put the money into his safe when he reconsiders and opens the envelope. He finds it full of pieces of cut newspaper!

  Heyes, Curry and George ride furiously out of town. Hot on their heels come an angry Wheelwright and his men. At a railroad water tower, he discovers their horses and a note. “Dear Verle, I didn’t want to go away mad. J. Smith.”

  Sprawled in a boxcar on the way to Silky’s with the money and the pearls, Curry wonders how Heyes knew Wheelwright was going to seal the envelope when he switched them. Heyes reveals that he increased their chances by having along an unsealed envelope of cut paper. Delighted with their triumph, Curry tosses the paper into the air like confetti.

  GUEST CAST

  ROBERT MIDDLETON — VERLE WHEELWRIGHT

  MICHELE LEE — GEORGETTE SINCLAIR

  JOHN BANNER — OTTO

  WALTER BRENNAN — SILKY O’SULLIVAN

  DAVE MORICK — HOTEL CLERK

  GREGG PALMER — FERMIN

  MONTY LAIRD — FARGO

  KAREN SMITH — FANNY TURPIN

  EUGENE SHIELDS — HOLDUP LEADER

  The script originally called for a reunion of characters met in previous episodes. Clementine, not Georgette, was to help the boys out, Diamond Jim Guffy, not Silky O’Sullivan, was to supply the money and necklace. In addition, Curry and Clem were to reprise their aliases of “Rhett” and Charlotte Brandon from “Dreadful Sorry, Clementine.” Heyes and Curry, who previously had considered going to South America to sit out their amnesty year, planned on going to Australia instead. [10] Things had drastically changed by the final script revision.

  Huggins’s script became a vehicle for him to not only experiment with the personality of his characters, but to play with names as well. Role reversal is one of the first things noticeable in this episode. Their friend Silky O’Sullivan, the wealthy, retired con man, still has a few tricks up his sleeve. Heyes knows how to get and use them. Previously quite pleasant, Silky turns menacing when the boys return without his jewels. He even goes so far as to threaten murder if his pearls are not returned, a side of the kindly old gentleman the audience hasn’t seen before. As for Heyes, his silver tongue fails to convince Wheelwright to return the pearls throughout Plans A, B, and C. It is Curry who forcefully, though unsuccessfully, reminds Wheelwright of the near impossibility of trying to sell the pearls. Somewhere Curry learned that the pearls, if sold separately, would bring in less than if they remain in the matched, albeit recognizable, string. Wheelwright is the one character who remains consistently obnoxious from the get-go. Huggins wanted him to be “a really interesting heavy, a man like Sidney Greenstreet. He has size and a cool menace — a worthy adversary.” [11] Heyes learns right off how devious he can be and he, Curry and Georgette regard him not as Wheel-right, but as Wheel-wrong. Finally, for Otto, the jeweler, Huggins wanted him to have a European accent to give him authority. [12] John Banner, familiar to television audiences as Sgt. Schultz from Hogan’s Heroes, was hired.

  Though not named in the aired episode, according to the script, the four men who stop the stagecoach purposefully looking for the pearls are named Art, Bart, Fargo and “the Leader.” [13] The hired gunmen who arrive at Wheelwright’s table to throw out Heyes and Curry are Ferman, Herman and Vermin. [14] When Wheelwright checks the envelope and discovers the cut newspaper, in the January 24 revision of the script, he “screams” for “Jo, Steve, Art!” to ride with him in pursuit. The three are no doubt Huggins’s idea of a joke on Jo Swerling (Associate Executive Producer), Steve Heilpern (Associate Producer), and Art McLaird (Assistant to the Producer).

  Besides his using off-the-wall names, Huggins managed to bring in references to real people as well. Wheelwright tells Chauncey that his sister cries better than Sarah Bernhardt. The French actress had begun to travel with her own company by 1879, appearing regularly in London and New York City and touring North America in 1886-87 and 1888-89, famous for her beauty and bell-like voice. Heyes compares the talents of the card sharp with Paganini, a famous Italian composer and violin virtuoso who died in 1840. His playing astonished the listeners of his day, as he performed complex works using only one of four violin strings. [15] It’s no wonder Heyes missed the card switch if the sharp were twice as talented! Finally, Wheelwright tells the Brandons over dinner that he met Mark Twain when he was a struggling young reporter. This would have been around 1862 when Twain reported for the Territorial Enterprise in Virginia City, Nevada.

  Three times within the first eleven minutes, Huggins reiterates for viewers that Curry and Heyes share a common Irish grandfather. Though he had presented them as cousins early in the series and had already changed the introduction from “latter-day Robin Hoods” to “Kansas cousins,” Huggins seems to have played it up more after Roger came on board. It couldn’t hurt, he thought, to explain away the similar coloring of Roger and Ben by re-enforcing their characters’ blood relation.

  What’s in It for Mia?

  “When you took The Clarion from me, Miss Bronson, you presented me with a monstrously simple choice — sin or starve. I chose sin because it presented the greater challenge.”

  George Austin

  STORY: JOHN THOMAS JAMES

  TELEPLAY: WILLIAM D. GORDON AND JOHN THOMAS JAMES

  DIRECTOR: JOHN DUMAS

  SHOOTING DATES: JANUARY 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 17, 1972

  ORIGINAL US AIR DATE: FEBRUARY 24, 1972

  ORIGINAL UK AIR DATE: DECEMBER 10, 1973

  The King City barber shop has a three hour wait, so Hannibal Heyes and Kid Curry while away the time playing poker at the Diamond Horseshoe Casino. They lose every hand. Heyes notices a well-dressed woman, Mia Bronson, coming out of the office and asks the other players if she’s the proprietor. Learning she is, he scoops up the cards over the protest of the dealer and he and Curry make their way over to her.

  Mia leads them into her office for privacy, but has two of her men, Max and Cliff, join them, not trusting the unkempt cowboys. Heyes offers to sell her the deck of cards for $250. Mia isn’t interested; she buys cards for twenty-five cents a pack. Not like these, Heyes assures her. “These are different. Unique. Marked.” Mia challenges him to show her the marks. Heyes can’t, but he knows they’re marked because seconds were being dealt. If she returns their $250, they’ll be on their way; otherwise, they’ll let everyone in town know she cheats. Mia’s two bodyguards start to draw, but Curry beats them to it. Unfortunately, the crooked dealer has entered the room and gotten the drop on the boys. Mia orders her men to take the two tramps out of town and dump them, making sure they know better than to ever return to King City. She watches in satisfaction as the beating begins.

  Max and Cliff dump the unconscious Heyes and Curry in a ditch outside of town.

  Later, having been found and brought home by George Austin and his daughter Charlotte, Heyes and Curry moan restlessly as she keeps vigil over them. Charlotte returns to the bedroom after a short break to find Heyes awake and confused. She soothes him as her father, drawn by the voices, enters the room. He introduces himself and explains how the boys came to be there, then urges Heyes to go back to sleep. Heyes takes his advice.

  In the morning Curry peers out the window, wondering where they are. He wakes Heyes and learns about the Austins, but are they back in King City? Maybe they’d better find out.

  The boys are in King City. The Austins aren’t surprised to learn that Mia Bronson is responsible for their injuries. She ran George Austin out of business and stole a fortune from them. Austin assures them that, as he’s no longer a threat to Mia, it’s safe for them to stay.

  That night, Heyes talks to Austin while Curry helps Charlotte in the kitchen. She explains that Mia drove away the advertisers, forcing her father to sell his newspaper. He had invested $30,000 in it and sold it for only $10,000. Charlotte is attracted to Curry. They share a leisurely kiss.

  Austin tells Heyes it was his printed criticism of Mia Bronson that caused her vendetta against him. After selling the newspaper, Au
stin discovered the buyer worked for Mia. The advertisers have returned and the paper is once again making money.

  Charlotte and Curry join them at the table. As Curry passes the sideboard, he notices a piece of paper on which is printed, in reverse image, a $10 bill. He shows it to Heyes who remarks that, if Austin is a counterfeiter, he sure is a good one. With a smile Austin invites the boys into his workshop.

  Austin has never seen a printing press that wasn’t cumbersome. He’d always wanted to come up with something better and once he lost the newspaper, started pursuing his dream. He’s made great progress on developing a chemical printing process. He demonstrates it for the boys, printing another fake $10 bill, explaining that the high quality of the ink in money makes it ideal for his tests. However, he couldn’t use it for counterfeiting even if he wanted to, because of the reversed image and the pulpy paper he must use.

  Heyes grows quiet, prompting Charlotte to worry that he’s bored. Heyes assures her he’s always quiet when he’s coming up with something brilliant. Heyes asks Austin how he’d like to get even with Mia Bronson and go back east with a pocketful of money. The idea appeals to him, although he hopes Joshua hasn’t got anything violent or illegal in mind. When Austin points out that Mia doesn’t just have people beaten, sometimes she has them killed, Heyes admits his plan is dangerous. Austin wants to hear it anyway.

  Clean-shaven and dressed in their city clothes, Heyes and Curry are unrecognizable as the troublesome tramps Mia dealt with earlier. They buy into the poker game with stacks of crisp new $10 bills. It’s not long before Cliff informs them Miss Bronson wants to see them in her office.

  The money they bought into the game with has a peculiar odor that has piqued Mia’s curiosity. Although the money looks real, she’s noticed two of the bills have the same serial number. Jones berates Smith for not waiting another day for the bills to air out, but Smith wants to know what that has to do with serial numbers. “You can’t smell serial numbers!” Jones retorts. Mia is interested and, with gun in hand, demands to know more. They earnestly plead to buy back the counterfeit bill. Their admission that the money is counterfeit reverses her attitude. She invites them to share her Napoleon brandy.

  In Austin’s workshop, Mia avidly watches as Austin mixes his chemicals. She offers him a brand-new bill to use, which he quickly switches when Curry diverts her attention by paying her for it. Mia is delighted to find that the sanctimonious journalist has become a counterfeiter. Austin completes the printing and shows her the result. It’s backwards, she protests. “Negatives always are,” Austin answers. Curry explains that the whole process is complicated, taking up to sixteen hours to complete. Immediately, Mia becomes suspicious, accusing them of trying to pull a switch on her. Curry reminds her she invited herself in on this deal and urges her to invite herself out. Heyes steps in as peacemaker. He has Mia note the serial number of the bill, then convinces her to stay while Austin mixes up the chemicals for the final step. She dutifully recites the number and watches as Austin puts the bill in the press and adds a piece of litmus paper. If she wants to see the final result, she can drop by the next day.

  As soon as Mia leaves, everyone hurries back into the workshop. Heyes takes one of their own bills and begins altering it. When he’s finished, he gives it to Charlotte to compare with the bill that was in the press. She can’t tell the difference. They both have the same serial number, but she can’t tell which one he changed.

  Austin exchanges the litmus paper for a piece of red paper to make it appear that the litmus paper changed color.

  The next day, Mia comes to see the counterfeit money. She compares the two bills and announces that they have made a believer out of her. She can’t tell which is real and which is fake. Smith offers to let Mia in on their plan to market the counterfeit money in neighboring towns at the rate of $1,000 per week. They’ll cut her in for twenty percent. Mia refuses. That’s small time. She wants them to print her $20,000 and then she’ll leave them alone.

  When Mia has gone, Austin and Heyes decide to split the $20,000 fifty-fifty while Curry and Charlotte make plans for their getaway. They’ll take the train to Denver, then buy tickets for another destination. They’ll be long gone before Mia realizes she’s been swindled. Curry has one more plan in mind, if Austin will show him how to use his old printing press.

  Mia arrives the next day with twenty new $1,000 bills for them to copy. They form an assembly line and soon have the printing press loaded with money and paper. The process is automatic from this point, although they do check on it from time to time. Mia is satisfied. She puts a carpetbag on the table and places the press inside. She’ll keep it in her room at the casino and bring it back when the litmus paper turns red. Austin and the boys are taken aback and scramble to find excuses to keep her from taking the press. None of them work and they watch in dismay as she leaves with the money.

  Afterwards, they lament the plan’s failure. Charlotte has everything ready to go, so they might as well catch the train. But Heyes comes up with another plan, a dangerous plan that might not work at all. He’ll accuse Mia of opening the machine, thereby ruining the process. “If you claim that she opened that press and she didn’t, you’re never going to get out of that saloon alive,” Curry warns him. Heyes is willing to take that chance.

  Early the next morning, Smith and Jones visit Mia to check on the press. Smith examines the machine and declares it’s been tampered with. Mia indignantly denies opening it, then, at Smith’s skepticism, reluctantly admits she did open it to check just the top bill. Smith explains the transfer process stopped when she released the pressure and let in air. Luckily, the ink is still good on the $1,000 bills. Jones tells her to let them dry and bring them back later.

  That night the men set up the press again, but this time they’re ready for her. When Mia turns to get her carpetbag, they switch presses and send her off with an admonishment to keep her hands off until the litmus paper turns red.

  Charlotte, her father and the boys board the train to Denver with $20,000 between them. Heyes and Curry are playing poker in the parlor car when Charlotte asks to talk to them in private. She’s glad to hear they’re winning at poker, because she wants them to give her father their half of the money, which by rights should be his. Heyes can see her point, but they can’t afford to be that generous. She was hoping they’d give up the money as a noble gesture, but if they don’t, she can get the money another way. When they were delirious they were talking to each other, using their real names. She was curious and discovered they are worth $10,000 a piece. Curry tries to charm her, reminding her of the kisses they shared. It was exciting kissing Kid Curry, she admits, but she knew all along the relationship couldn’t go anywhere. Charlotte is adamant; there’s a US Marshal on board the train and she’ll turn them in if she has to. Heyes and Curry make the noble gesture.

  Meanwhile, back in King City, Mia is faced with thousands of flyers offering a $1,000 prize to the first man who figures out how she marks the cards in her casino. “Apply for prize money to Mr. Joshua Smith and Mr. Thaddeus Jones, 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington, D.C.” With a cry, she rushes to the press and frantically opens it, finding only blank paper.

  GUEST CAST

  IDA LUPINO — MIA BRONSON

  BUDDY EBSEN — GEORGE AUSTIN

  SALLIE SHOCKLEY — CHARLOTTE AUSTIN

  GEORGE ROBOTHAM — MAX

  ALLEN PINSON — KARL

  BUD WALLS — CLIFF

  JOHN KELLOGG — DEALER

  Although this was the fourth episode with Roger Davis to be aired, it was shot just after “The Biggest Game in the West,” and thus was the first one in which he was free to give his own interpretation to the character of Hannibal Heyes instead of having to mimic Peter Duel’s characterization. Left to his own creative instincts, Roger played Heyes much differently than Peter had, so much so that many viewers feel that the character was thereafter written differently to accommodate him. When asked if that was the case, Huggins
immediately denied it. “I would have a professional rejection of the idea that when you get a new actor you have to change the character.” [16] The outlines, story notes and rewrite notes for the post-Duel episodes bear this out. The character did not change, only the actor’s take on it.

  “The Biggest Game in the West” and “What’s in It for Mia?” share a common ancestry — an episode of Maverick called “Rage for Vengeance.” That story features a woman who uses counterfeit money placed in a bank for safekeeping (but not deposited) to open a newspaper and expose the corruption of a local cattleman.

  The genesis of this story goes back to 1957 when Howard Browne had an idea for an episode of Maverick in which Bret would play poker for counterfeit money. Browne tried various tacks but ultimately couldn’t make the story work. He turned the idea over to Roy Huggins, who also played around with it and came up with the story told in “Rage for Vengeance,” which had counterfeit money and lots of action, but no poker game. [17] After almost fifteen years, Huggins found a way to make the original idea work and the poker game was finally incorporated into a story about counterfeit money in “The Biggest Game in the West.” Never one to let a good story go by, Huggins then took the portion of the story regarding the newspaper owner battling corruption, gave it a twist and fashioned it into this episode. It’s quite fitting, given this history, that Mia Bronson gets her comeuppance through counterfeit money.

  Though this script went through five drafts, there weren’t many changes made to the basic story. Instead, Huggins guided writer Bill Gordon towards simplification, urging him to eliminate subtle details in the opening sequence that would “take too much coverage and are time-consuming to shoot” and suggesting less complicated ways of conveying information to avoid what he called “too much connective tissue.” [18] Huggins was also concerned that Gordon hadn’t been clear that Austin’s process was not a successful method of counterfeiting. Besides Austin being a law-abiding citizen, Huggins wanted to make sure the plan belonged to Heyes, saying, “If we get the impression that Austin is already close to counterfeiting, what Heyes does doesn’t become very interesting…Austin should state the difficulties very clearly…But Heyes is still thinking. Thus we can hook the interest of our audience: what could he possibly be thinking?” [19]