King 02 - Breathless

by Kandle, Tawdra

He smirked a little then. “Sorry. Actually you’re going the wrong way. I live on the other side of town.”

  Now I did let loose a loud sigh of exasperation. “Well, thanks for letting me know. Why didn’t you tell me before?”

  “I was listening to you. I didn’t want to interrupt.” He flashed that grin at me. “And I was hoping maybe you’d take me on a little ride. You know, show me around the area, maybe out into the country?”

  I snorted. “I don’t think so. I’m not a tour guide. You have your own car. Drive yourself around.” I turned around at the next opportunity. “Now where exactly am I going?”

  “Through town, then out beyond the lake.”

  My foot slipped off the gas, and I struggled to keep from stalling the engine. “The lake?”

  “Yeah. You know, Lake Rosu. It’s just south of the downtown area.”

  “I know where it is.” My hands tightened on the wheel. I hadn’t been anywhere near Lake Rosu since my brush with death last year, and I really wasn’t certain I could handle going there now.

  “It’s a pretty nice day.” Rafe didn’t seem to notice my discomfort. “We could stop by the lake, hang out a little bit.”

  “I don’t think so.” I tried to keep the tremor out of my voice and focused on the road before me.

  And then it seemed for just a moment that the road was no longer there. It was as though the world shifted, almost imperceptibly, and I suddenly felt dizzy and disoriented.

  “What did you do?” I cried, struggling to keep the car under control. I couldn’t pinpoint why, but I felt that Rafe was somehow responsible for whatever had just happened. I steered the car to the shoulder as soon as I had an opportunity.

  “What are you talking about? What’s wrong?” Rafe was staring at me incredulously.

  I leaned my forehead on the steering wheel and worked on calming my breath. And while my face was partially obscured, I lowered my mental wall and concentrated on hearing Rafe’s mind. In my current emotional state, it wasn’t difficult.

  At first I perceived only the confusion that I’d expect from someone who had no idea what was going on. His thoughts seemed to echo that bewilderment. And then there was just the slightest change, and I sensed the vaguest shadow of guilt. I could hear him with particular clarity.

  What’s wrong with her? What does she mean? Could she know? Did she feel that, somehow?

  So then he had indeed done something. But what? I wondered if he had manipulated my mind in some way. I couldn’t quite describe what had happened.

  I leaned back in my seat and tried to order my own thoughts, and as I did, I discovered that my face felt flushed and my lips sensitive—almost tender. I brushed a finger across them, frowning, and glanced at Rafe suspiciously. He was still looking at me cautiously.

  “Are you okay? You look—you’re really… pale.”

  “Sorry.” I straightened and took a deep breath. “I just—I don’t know. Something happened. It felt like—I don’t know,” I repeated. “Just something weird.”

  “Are you okay to drive?” There was real concern in his voice.

  “Yes, I’m fine now,” I answered. “I’m sorry if I scared you. But Rafe...” I struggled to find the right words. I wasn’t sure what had just occurred, but I did realize that I had to explain some things. It wasn’t fair to just continue being impatient and snarly with him. “I know I’ve been rude to you, or at least it probably seems that way. I just don’t want to give you the wrong impression. I think you’re probably a natural flirt. That comes easy for you. But I don’t know how to deal with that. I have Michael, and even if he’s not here right now, he is my world. You were right about one thing. He’s it for me. I don’t see anyone else.

  “If you want to be my friend, that would be great. But I need you to be less... charming. Just more yourself.”

  Rafe was quiet for a moment. “What if being charming is my real self?” he asked, almost mockingly. Before I could answer, he shook his head. “Never mind. Okay, I promise. No more suggestive comments. No more flirting—with you, at least.” He smiled crookedly.

  In relief I returned his smile. “Good. Thanks.” I carefully pulled the car back onto the road. Rafe was silent for the remainder of the trip, except to give me directions to his grandparents’ home.

  It was in a small neighborhood beyond Lake Rosu. I had never been there before, although I thought that perhaps Michael’s friend Craig lived in the same area. The homes were older and larger than those in my part of town, and there was a stately air that was absent in the newer sections of King.

  “Right there.” Rafe pointed to a large grey house the sat on a small hill. I followed the winding driveway to the top, and Rafe opened his door. He swung his legs out, and then turned back to me.

  “Back there,” he began. “Back by the lake. Before you pulled over. What happened? You asked me what I did.”

  I decided to be as honest as I could and hope for the same from Rafe. “I don’t know. It was almost like when I lived in California and we’d have earthquakes. It was a subtle shifting—like one minute everything was fine, and then there was almost a—like blip, in time, I guess. I’ve never had anything like that happen.” I looked at him squarely. “Do you know what happened? Did you have anything to do with it?”

  He returned my gaze without blinking. “Why would you ask that? How could I possibly have anything to do with something that you can’t even really describe?”

  There wasn’t any way to answer that question. I lifted my shoulder in a small shrug and felt a familiar frustration. I was in the same no-win situation I’d experienced last year, with Nell and Amber. I couldn’t confront him or accuse him without revealing my own secrets, and I certainly wasn’t willing to do that at this point.

  It was Rafe who finally looked away. He climbed out of the car and closed the door behind him, then leaned back into the open window.

  “Thanks for the ride,” he said quietly. “She really is a beauty.” His eyes were only slightly ironic as he spoke and then turned to follow the brick path to the front door.

  I drove home in thoughtful silence.

  That night was the first time I cried during my phone call with Michael.

  When I got home, my mother was absorbed in her own work, tucked away in her office. She called an absent hello as I stood in the kitchen, looking for a quick snack and a drink.

  Grabbing a glass of water and a granola bar, I retreated to my bedroom to ponder the afternoon. The exchange with Cara and Amber’s warning about being honest with Michael hung over me. Every now and again my mind wandered back to Ms. Lacusta’s book, and I wondered again why she felt it was so important for me to read that history. And of course the ride with Rafe made me very uneasy.

  But deep down I knew what I was trying so hard to keep out of my head. My lips were still tender, and my cheeks felt almost wind burned. It wasn’t an unfamiliar sensation, but it was an unwelcome one. I had a sneaking dread of what might have happened, but part of me kept pushing the idea away.

  I called Amber before dinner. I needed to talk to someone, and Amber was the only person from whom I had no secrets at this point. She was still a little numb from her afternoon dental appointment—two fillings, she informed me—and although her words weren’t always clear, she was able to listen as I poured out the day’s woes to her.

  “What do you think happened? What did he do?” she wondered, still sounding as though she were speaking through cotton.

  “I’m not really sure,” I replied slowly. “It was one of the strangest feelings I’ve ever had. It almost felt like I couldn’t breathe. And I was a little nauseous, too. It was like being on a ride that went too fast, you know? When your stomach just drops?”

  “I hate those kinds of rides,” Amber said. “Are you sure that Rafe actually did something? Maybe it was just a coincidence.”

  “No,” I said with certainty. “No, he was definitely giving off a guilt vibe. And he clearly thought, Could she know? Wh
y would he think that if he didn’t have something to do with it?”

  “Hmm… I guess so.” She sighed. “You know, I’ve lived my whole life in this town without seeing anything strange until last year, with Nell. Now I’m going to have to look at everyone I know who’s from an original family and wonder what they’re up to.”

  I laughed without too much humor. Amber’s parents had moved here to King before she was born, so while she had lived here all of her life, her family wasn’t descended from the carnival folk who had established the town over a hundred years ago. Michael had told me about King’s fascinating history last year when I first became aware of Nell’s extracurricular activities. On the surface, it appeared to be a quaintly typical small town, but I had evidence that at least some of the original settling families were continuing to hone darker skills passed down from their ancestors.

  “I don’t trust him. I’m not entirely sure why, but I don’t.” My frown deepened as I leaned against the pillows on my bed. I hesitated for only a moment before plunging ahead to tell everything.

  “Amber, there was more. After my head stopped spinning, I realized something else was wrong. I felt like…” I swallowed hard. This was going to sound so strange. “It felt like I’d been kissed.”

  There was silence on the other end. “Kissed?” Amber finally echoed.

  “Yes. As though someone had been holding my face—I could almost feel the hands still there—and my lips were—well, just take it from me. I know what it feels like when someone—when you’ve—” My cheeks were flushed as I tried to explain. “Amber, I think Rafe kissed me, then did something to my mind to cover it up.”

  “Why in the world would he do that, and how?”

  “I’m completely clueless on the how, but the why… think about it. If he did kiss me and I freaked out on him—which I know I would—he would want to make me forget about it, right?”

  “Yeah.” I heard Amber suck in a breath. “I can see that. Especially given everything you told me before about him—what he’s been thinking about since he met you. He might have decided to see just how serious you are about Michael. You know, test your resolve.”

  “Exactly,” I agreed. “He’s just arrogant enough to think he might be able to change my mind. And then when it didn’t work, he just pulled his little hocus-pocus, whatever it was.” I was silent for a moment, thinking. “I’m going to have to find out who his family is, which carnie they’re descended from. That might give me a clue about how he made this happen.”

  “Do you think he’s done it before?” I heard the curiosity in Amber’s voice.

  “You mean around us? I don’t think so. At least not around me. Believe me, I would remember feeling the way I did today.” I shuddered. “It was creepy.”

  “But how much of that was whatever mind trick Rafe pulled and how much could have been the effects of him kissing you—if that’s what he did?” Amber speculated.

  I paused. She had a point. “That’s a thought. If it was the kissing, then Michael has nothing to worry about. Ugh.” I shook my head.

  Amber laughed. “I don’t think he had anything to worry about anyway,” she said. I heard a voice in the background. “Hey, Tas, sorry, but I need to go. My mom’s home and she wants to hear about my dentist appointment. Talk to you tomorrow, okay?”

  The phone disconnected, but I lay on the bed, staring up at the ceiling, still troubled.

  I remained preoccupied all during dinner. My father had to ask me twice how my calculus class was going, and even then I answered so vaguely that I could feel his concern instantly ratchet up. I managed to pull it together enough to allay any worry he and my mom were feeling and escape into my room just as my phone was playing Michael’s special ring tone.

  When I answered and heard his voice, I burst into tears.

  His alarm was instant. “Tasmyn, what’s wrong?”

  I struggled to control my sobs. “N-n-nothing. I just m-m-miss you,” I wept.

  He blew out a long breath. “I know. I miss you, too. But something else is up, isn’t it?”

  I cast my mind about to find something from the day I could share with him. Eventually I would tell him about Rafe, but for now, it fell into the “would make Michael worry” category.

  So instead I told him about my conversation with Cara at lunch, editing out any mentions of Rafe. I told him too about my encounter with her father the day before, and I could tell from his lack of violent response that he had heard this story before.

  “You talked to your mom today, didn’t you?” I asked.

  “Actually, last night. Why didn’t you tell me?”

  I sniffled. “We were having such a nice talk last night, I didn’t want to ruin it.”

  To my relief, he laughed. “Yeah, I thought so, too. But don’t feel like you can’t tell me stuff, okay? I want to know what’s going on.”

  I pushed back the guilt that rose instantly in my chest. “I know. But anyway, I think what happened with her dad made me feel even worse about Cara today. And Michael…” I gulped, and then plunged ahead. “She really likes you. I mean, really. What am I going to do about that?”

  “Nothing much you can do, and nothing you need to worry about. Cara’s all right, I guess, but I know who has my heart. And I hope you do, too,” he added.

  “I do,” I answered softly. “I only wish I were close enough to hear you.”

  “Well, I guess you’re going to have to get used to trusting me when I tell you things, like the rest of us mere mortals.”

  I snorted. “I might have to do it, but I don’t have to like it.”

  Michael laughed at me again, and I could almost feel the weight of the day lifting from me.

  At lunch on Friday, I scanned the crowd for Rafe, but I didn’t see him. At our table, Cara was almost silent, and Amber tried to make up for that by keeping up a steady stream of chatter. I could feel the tension around us, and I could hear Cara’s sulky thoughts, although I concentrated on ignoring them.

  After school, I pulled in a breath of weekend freedom and put down the top on the Mustang for my ride out to the nursery. Once I cleared town, music blared from the speakers—the fastest, loudest tunes on my iPod. Michael and I had influenced each other’s musical tastes to a certain degree; I liked some of his country picks and his beloved oldies, and he admitted to enjoying a few of my edgier alt rock bands. I smiled as I considered all the years of music Michael’s classic car had heard and wondered if she approved of my selection. She hummed along the road, making me think she did indeed.

  The nursery was brisk with business, and I got right to work as soon as I arrived. I had waited on several customers when I felt the calm sweetness that told me Marly was near, and I heard her thoughts before I felt her hand on my shoulder.

  “Hey, sweetie,” she greeted me. “Happy Friday. How’s it going?”

  “It’s going,” I replied, tossing her a swift smile. “We’re busy today!”

  “Always good to hear. So, are you up for dinner tonight?”

  I laughed as some of her louder thoughts filtered into my head. “Seems like you already have it all planned out. You cleared it with my parents, and you’ve got the chicken marinating. And… I’m making a salad?”

  Marly pulled a mock-guilty face. “I can’t slip anything past you. Yes to all of the above. I hope you don’t mind that I made the plans without asking you, but I wanted to have some time to talk about homecoming weekend.”

  The prospect of hanging out with Marly and Luke and discussing a trip up to visit Michael brightened my day considerably. The rest of the afternoon flew by, and as soon as we turned the closed sign on the door of the shop, I sprinted up the path to the house. It was comforting to find my familiar place at the kitchen counter, tearing greens and mixing dressing.

  We lounged around the table on the deck, enjoying the waning light of day and the pleasant aftermath of a delicious dinner.

  “Homecoming is the first weekend in November,” Marly sa
id, leaning back in her chair and resting her feet in Luke’s lap. “There’s a rally on Friday night, the football game on Saturday and the dance Saturday night. I thought maybe if your parents agreed, you and I could drive up Friday morning and then plan on being home Sunday night. What do you think?”

  The idea of three days with Michael made me giddy. “I think it sounds perfect,” I answered. “Are you sure it’s okay for you to be away from the nursery that weekend? And for me to miss work, too?”

  Luke laughed. “I think we’ll make it without you two,” he replied dryly. “Although it will be a struggle...”

  Marly nudged him with her foot. “That’s enough out of you. You know you’re going to miss both of us, and you’re just jealous that we’re going away without you.”

  Luke raised his hands in mock defeat. “Okay, you’ve got me. It’s just a brave front I’m putting on...”

  Marly giggled and rolled her eyes at him. “Ignore him, Tas. Yes, it’s fine for us to be away. I’ve arranged coverage for the shop, and my own work is running pretty smoothly right now. So you only need to worry about finding a dress for the dance and making sure you can miss school that Friday.”

  “I’m sure I can work it out.” I knew most of my teachers would work with me so that missing one day wouldn’t hurt anything. Fleetingly I thought of Ms. Lacusta and just as quickly pushed her to the back of my mind. She would just have to understand.

  “Tas, Marly told me about what happened the other day with Matt Pryce.” Luke shifted in his chair, absently running a hand over his wife’s bare feet. “I’m sorry that happened. I want you to know that I won’t stand for him coming into the nursery and treating you like that. From now on, if he does come into the shop, just let someone else wait on him. Worst case, call Marly or me.”

  I felt the genuine concern and resolute protectiveness coming from both Marly and Luke, and it warmed me. I knew that they were worried, and it would have been easy to let them stand between me and the Reverend Pryces of the world.

  “Thanks.” I reached across the table and laid my hand on Marly’s. “Really. I appreciate it. But I’m okay. I don’t intend to let him get the best of me. I’m tougher than you think.” I tried to throw some bravado behind my words, but I saw Michael’s parents exchange looks, and I heard their doubtful thoughts.