Playing With Fire

by Alison Bliss

  I started inside, but Cowboy braced his arm across the doorway, blocking my entry. “Wait just a fucking minute. I’ve never treated you like that.”

  I raised a brow to him. “Oh, yeah?”

  “You damn well know I haven’t. I’ve never forced myself on you. You wanted me to kiss you…both times.”

  “How do you know? Did you ask me?”

  “Well, no. But I—”

  “Exactly. And I do believe the second time I specifically asked you not to. But you didn’t listen.” I shook my head at him. “You men are all alike. You take whatever you want because you’re so afraid someone else might get to it first. Well, I’m not a trophy to be fought over. Good night, Cowboy,” I said, stepping inside as I swung the door closed.

  But not before the toe of a boot slid inside.

  Chapter Twelve

  Cowboy shoved the door open. “I’m not done with you, yet.”

  “Well, I’m done with you.” I spun on my heel and stormed into the kitchen.

  His boots thudded on the tile behind me. He’d shadowed my movements because as I neared the sink, he grasped my shoulders and spun me around to face him. “Sonofabitch, Anna. Stop walking away.”

  I sighed in defeat. “What do you want from me?”

  He dropped his hand from my arm and clenched his fist at his side. “One fucking date. That’s what I want.”

  “No.”

  “Just dinner, nothing else.”

  “I said no.”

  Cowboy closed his eyes and counted to ten under his breath. “Darlin’, I’m about to blow my fucking top. Never in my life have I had to beg a woman to go out with me.”

  I crossed my arms and looked at him in disbelief. “And what? You want a round of applause? A monument in your honor? How about a cookie?”

  “No, I want an explanation.”

  “I don’t owe you anything, Cowboy, an explanation or anything else for that matter.”

  His eyes glazed with fury. “You damn sure owe me something after the bullshit you’ve put me through for the last week.”

  I looked him directly in the eye and scoffed under my breath. “I already told you I wasn’t interested in dating you. But you just won’t listen. You’re crazy if you think you can blame—”

  “Shut up.”

  I blinked, registering what he said. “Did you just tell me to—”

  “Damn straight I did. I’m tired of listening to your bullshit excuses. That story of yours about you not being interested has more holes than chicken wire. Every time I touch you, your body reacts to me. And you already know what you do to me. I’ve had the same goddamn boner for over a fucking week. And jerking off hasn’t done a damn thing to relieve it. So why don’t you do us both a favor and quit blowing sunshine up my ass.”

  My mouth had fallen open, but I managed to snap it shut. “You don’t need to use your licentious language on me.”

  His brows furrowed. “In English this time?”

  “You know…the…um, sexy talk,” I explained, my face flaring with heat. “Stop it. You’re embarrassing me.”

  His expression lightened as he grinned with amusement, obviously delighted by my discomfort and not exhibiting the least bit of remorse for his behavior. “Darlin’, I hate to tell you this, but there’s no one else here.”

  I straightened my spine and took on a chastising tone. “Doesn’t matter. Someone has to teach you proper etiquette.”

  “Oh, fuck me,” Cowboy groaned, shifting the bulge in his crotch and shaking his head. “I can’t believe I’m getting all hot and bothered for a woman who acts like an old-fashioned schoolmarm.”

  I glared at him. “Why don’t you just leave me alone, then? Lord knows I’ve asked you to several times.”

  He closed his eyes and pursed his lips. “Because I can’t, okay?”

  “What do you mean you can’t?”

  “You’re like a…drip on a leaky fucking faucet. You know, where at first you don’t notice it, but once you do, it’s the only damn thing you can concentrate on.”

  “So now I’m a drip?”

  “No. That’s not what I… What I mean is…” He pinched the bridge of his nose as the delivery of his lines stilted. “God, I’m fucking this up.” He took a deep breath and looked back at me. “Don’t you get it? Anna, I want you.”

  My stomach twisted into a knot, and I clamped my eyes shut, trying to block out his words. A sickening wave of nausea washed over me. Though I wasn’t planning on staying much longer, the thought of having Cowboy at least once was enough to tempt me. It was a fantasy I’d played over and over in my head many times before. But could I actually do it? Could I allow myself one night with him, knowing it would mean more to me than it would to him?

  No. I couldn’t possibly torture myself that way. To even consider it meant he’d already gotten under my skin. But to grant him one night would only ensure that when my time was up, I’d leave with nothing more than fond memories and a broken heart.

  So instead, I said the one thing that would put an end to his relentless pursuit. “Cowboy, I didn’t move here with any intention of finding a relationship. Even if I had, I’d want one with substance, one that means something. Not a fling with someone who wants to take care of his…er, baser needs. I’d need a commitment.”

  “So that’s what it all boils down to, right? You think I’m in it for the sexual reward? Like some sort of test to my manhood? I’m not, I swear.” He measured me with his eyes, his face serious.

  Jeez. Would the man go to any lengths to get a woman in his bed? “You don’t have to pretend you’re interested in anything more than a one-night—”

  His hand shot out and grasped my upper arm. “Where the hell did you get a lame-ass idea like that?”

  I squirmed to free myself, but his grip only tightened. “That’s what you’ve been after since day one, isn’t it? To get me out of my clothes?”

  “Of course not.”

  I raised a questioning brow.

  “Okay, so maybe I’ve come on a little strong. But when it comes to you, I can’t help myself. I’ve never met anyone like you. You challenge me in ways no other woman ever has.” He lessened the strength of his hold on me. “I want you to give this thing between us a chance.”

  “You just see me as some sort of prize to be won because I’m the only girl who’s ever turned you down. You said so yourself.”

  Cowboy’s posture stiffened and a vein throbbed in his temple. “Maybe that’s how it started out, but you’re not just some woman who turned me down. If I only wanted to have sex with you, I’d have taken you against the door when I had the chance.” I opened my mouth to argue, but he continued. “Don’t even bother denying it. Because, darlin’, we both know I damn well could have,” he said, a sly grin forming on his perfect mouth as his intense eyes focused on mine.

  A lump formed in my throat and my stomach twisted into a knot. The heat from his gaze alone had me clenching my thighs together.

  “Look, I know I’m a piece of shit who doesn’t deserve someone like you to give me a chance,” he said, keeping his voice controlled and his tone even, “but I’m asking you to anyway. You’re more than a passing interest for me.”

  That was the moment it dawned on me.

  I blinked at him in fascinated horror, as if I were watching a speeding car driving headfirst into a brick wall. He wasn’t asking for a one-night stand at all. Cowboy was asking me for a relationship, the very thing I’d just told him I wouldn’t settle for less than. Crap.

  I hadn’t been prepared for this and wasn’t sure what to say, so I shook my head adamantly and said, “I’m sorry, but you’re…not my type.”

  His control wavered as he sneered. “Why? Because I’m not Prince Fucking Charming on a white goddamn horse? You think I can’t measure up to the heroes in those fucking romance books you read?”

  “It’s not that,” I told him, my eyes avoiding his as my body trembled. “I…I just don’t want this.”


  God, I wanted this…and so much more.

  He gritted his teeth. “Anna, you’re going to have to do better than that if you think you have any chance at convincing me you don’t want me. What the fuck are you so afraid of?”

  “Nothing.” My voice cracked under the pressure.

  “That’s bullshit and you know it,” he ground out, pulling me to him.

  My hands flew to his chest and I struggled to push him away. “No, I can’t.” He held enough power over my emotions to make me change my mind and tell him the truth, but I couldn’t let that happen. I couldn’t put anyone else at risk…especially him. I wouldn’t allow him to make himself a target for the man I knew would soon be coming for me. Because he always came for me.

  One of his hands held my waist firmly as the other pushed a strand of my hair back and slowly moved down my neck until his palm rested above my left breast. “You feel that—the way your heart pounds against my hand and your body trembles under my touch? Don’t tell me it’s nothing.”

  It was something, but… “I…can’t do this. Not to you.”

  “Then talk to me, Anna. Tell me what’s stopping you.”

  “I just don’t want you to…touch me.” Tears welled up in my eyes as my voice broke.

  His jaw tightened and his mouth turned into a frown. “What is it about me touching you that scares you so much?”

  “Nothing. It doesn’t,” I said quickly, adamantly denying it. I pushed against him, hoping he’d release me. I needed to get away from him. Now. His grip only tightened. I was going to have to tell him something or he was never going to stop pressing for the truth. “I’m afraid you’ll stop, okay?” Having blurted out the one thing that bothered me most about leaving, I blinked and a fat tear landed on my cheek. But I managed to cover up the truth by giving him something that would make complete sense. “M-my scars…”

  “Darlin’, I’ve already seen your scars, remember?”

  Sniffling, I lowered my head, unable to look him in the eye. “Yes, but not the full extent of them.”

  “Doesn’t matter. When I look at you, I don’t see scars.” He lifted my chin with one finger and used his thumb to wipe away the tear. “I only see you. And whether you believe it or not, sweetheart, you’re beautiful. If you haven’t noticed, I haven’t wanted to stop touching you since I first gave in to the notion.”

  “But you did. The night you first saw them, you touched them, and then left.”

  Cowboy’s green eyes glittered as a muscle twitched in his neck. “Darlin’, the only fucking reason I walked out on you that night was to keep my dick from tearing through my jeans to get at you.”

  My heart squeezed painfully tight in my chest. Contemplating a one-night stand with Cowboy was one thing…even if I couldn’t bring myself to tear my own heart out that way. But the moment he clarified he wanted more from me, I was lost. Yet I couldn’t ruin his life by letting him get closer to me. I needed to end this now by telling him I was leaving because I was in danger. I had no choice. Only then would he understand.

  “There are other things you don’t know about me. Things that matter. You have no idea what you’re getting yourself into. I’m not a whole person.” More tears flowed down my cheeks as I tried to make him understand. “I’m…broken.”

  His gaze flickered over my face as his mouth set in determination. He ran his fingers along the nape of my neck and leaned into me. “Then let me fix you,” he whispered.

  Unexpectedly, his mouth crashed against mine, sending my heart scrambling around inside my chest, searching for purchase. Sweet warmth pooled low in my belly as he parted my lips and sank deeper into me with his tongue. I plunged my fingers into his thick, wavy hair, knocking his white Stetson off his head. But even then, he didn’t stop kissing me.

  The hand he held over my breast twitched, but he quickly moved it to my waist. I had no doubt it was to keep himself from shifting a little lower and stroking the pebbled nub pressing into his chest. Because he undoubtedly would look like a fool if he told me this wasn’t sexual for him one minute, then fondled me the next.

  But no matter what lies I’d told him earlier, I craved his touch. Wanted it more than the air I breathed. No one had ever made me feel as alive as Cowboy, and I needed to feel his warmth against my bare skin. Just once…

  In that moment, my reservations slipped completely away, no longer allowing me to keep myself at a distance. I grabbed his hand and moved it back up, covering my left breast.

  Cowboy’s mouth murmured against mine. “What are you doing, sweetheart?”

  Hell if I knew. “I need to feel your hands on me.”

  “Christ,” he groaned. He pulled his head back and searched my face for answers. “You sure about this?”

  “God, yes,” I rasped. In a gutsy, liberating move, I grabbed him by the collar and pulled his mouth back to mine, eager to have another taste.

  It was a mistake, losing my composure that way, letting him tamper with my heart. But I couldn’t stop myself. He forced me to feel things I didn’t want to feel. And it was soul-shattering.

  But Cowboy didn’t do things half-assed. His hand dove under my shirt, roughly pushed my bra up, and cupped my naked breast. He thumbed over my sensitive nipple and gave it a pinch that stopped somewhere short between pleasure and pain, sending chills through me.

  As I gasped, he took full advantage of my open mouth and plunged his tongue inside. A small whimper escaped my throat. He pulled back a little, allowing his lips to move against mine, as he whispered, “Fuck. I’m addicted to the way you taste. You don’t know how beautiful you are.” Then his lips claimed mine once more.

  His hand grew more persistent as my nipple tightened beneath his calloused fingertips. I moaned into his mouth, pleasure zinging through my veins with every touch. His ravenous hunger consumed me, leaving me dangling limply in his arms.

  By the time his teeth moved to nibble on my ear, I was panting and clinging to him like static, half out of my mind in some weird, altered state. And he must’ve known because he used it against me.

  “Anna…?”

  “Mmm-hmmm.”

  His lips brushed against my earlobe as his warm breath caressed my neck. “Dinner with me. Tomorrow night.”

  And just like the colt he’d whispered to, I was tamed into submission, unable to speak. I meant to shake my head, but instead found myself nodding. The moment I agreed, he released me and I staggered backward, swaying on my feet while feeling a little frayed around the edges.

  He only looked more pleased with himself. “You okay there, sweetheart?”

  No. “Yes.”

  He chuckled and gave me a wolfish, smug grin. “Good. Then I’ll see you tomorrow night.” Cowboy lifted his hat from the floor, placed it on his head, and then tipped it as he gave me a quick wink. “Pick you up at seven.” With that, he turned on his heel and walked out.

  What the hell just happened?

  After spending three hours on the computer trying to figure out the puzzle of Chief Swanson’s missing brother, I sighed, turned off the screen, and headed to bed. For a second, I thought I’d found him, but quickly realized my mistake. The old photograph had been of Chief Swanson when he was younger and his name had been misprinted. That small setback had cost me precious time and frustrated the hell out of me. I was starting to doubt if I would ever find Ned Swanson.

  Which was the exact reason I hadn’t bothered to mention it to Cowboy. I hadn’t wanted to get his hopes up if I couldn’t find the man before I left town. With only a few short months to go, I’d have to pick up the pace. Otherwise, Cowboy would have to go at it alone.

  Like I’d be when I leave this place. Alone.

  I slid under the covers and turned off the bedside lamp, plunging myself into darkness. Unable to get comfortable, I rolled over onto my stomach and huffed. Did he mean what he’d said about seeing what was between us? I mean, he had me right where he wanted me…yet he still backed off. Annoyed, I leaned up and punched my pillo
w and then flipped over onto my back. Maybe I should call the whole date-thing off.

  Hell, when it came to Cowboy, there were just no guarantees. I’d learned that lesson back in summer camp while living vicariously through Kelly Deter’s tales of her intimate moments with Cowboy. Only one day after he’d had his hands up her skirt, he’d dumped the poor girl and moved on to some other unsuspecting victim of his charm.

  As I imagined the other women had been, I was too easily distracted by the crook of his finger and that sexy smirk of his. He’d made me feel special, and I hadn’t been able to ignore the burning-hot desire bubbling under my skin. Before I even realized what he was doing, he’d turned me into a hopeless puddle of confusion and I’d accepted his offer of a date. Damn him.

  But I wasn’t naive enough to think the moment he talked me out of my panties he’d stick around for anything resembling a relationship. Hell, he’d be gone before my breathing regulated. But if that’s what it took for him to get me out of his system, then so be it.

  The mere thought of having sex with Cowboy had me blowing out a hard breath. From the first moment he’d kissed me, I’d spent countless hours struggling to control my impure thoughts.

  Even now, a warm, tingling sensation spread throughout my lower body and my forehead broke into a full-on sweat. The room suddenly had become unbearably hot, sweltering even. Jesus. The man wasn’t even here and he had me all hot and bothered. I kicked the bedspread off and rose from the bed.

  If I planned to get any sleep, I needed to erase the memory of what his hands and mouth had done to my body. As if I even could.

  I staggered toward the back door in search of some fresh air. I opened the door and stepped out onto the back porch, smiling at the sound of an owl hooting in the distance. My hair swayed in the balmy Texas breeze as my gaze followed the silver sheen of moonlight slanting across the wooden deck and onto a pair of…cowboy boots?

  My smile deteriorated as my heart pounded furiously against my rib cage, plundering my sense of security. The scent of mint and tobacco overwhelmed me. I didn’t want to look up, but I had to know if what I was seeing was real. I swallowed hard as my eyes lifted.