Blue Desire

by Sindra van Yssel

  He got up, stepped back, and admired his work. Of course, it helped that he had the perfect subject with soft pale skin just right for dark blue rope.

  “Oh my God, this is intense,” she said.

  “Good.”

  “I thought you said it was going to be all about you.”

  “Oh, it is all about me, little kitty. Everything you feel, it’s because I did it to you. Every orgasm you will have this week will be from me, because of me. You’re close now, aren’t you?”

  She didn’t answer. “When will you come, Master? Shouldn’t you be the one coming now?”

  “That’s up to me, isn’t it? But I will come and come hard. When I’m good and ready to empty every last drop into your sweet mouth. I’m enjoying the anticipation.” And he was. He knew where and when his next orgasm was coming from. He was aching, but the wait was only going to make it that much better when he finally achieved his release. Now she would be anticipating too.

  SHE WAS CLOSE. She didn’t want to be, because she had it fixed in her mind that he’d be the next one to find that kind of pleasure. But there was nothing she could do about it. Every time she squirmed, the knot rubbed against her clit. And she couldn’t stop from squirming because of the way the vibrator shook her pussy and sent its vibrations right through to whatever he had put in her ass. She couldn’t get away from any of it. And he was standing there, smiling, watching her. If ever a man had an evil grin, it was him.

  The ropes were squeezing her breasts too. They felt like they were bulging, although they didn’t look that way. Still, they were definitely being pressed, and it wasn’t like wearing a too-tight bra either. And the knot at her belly button tickled. If she hadn’t been so distracted by everything else, she would have been annoyed by it, but right now it was one more sensation for her overloaded brain.

  And still he stood there watching while inside her the vibe hummed away and drove her crazy. She didn’t think she could actually come this way, not without more in and out or a more reliable source of friction. The knot that rubbed against her clit was enough to make her nuts but not quite enough to make her come. If he pressed down on it, maybe then it would be right. But no, he was just standing there, watching her from the edge of the room, with his cock rigidly at attention and the rest of his body relaxed and leaning back against the wall.

  A cock had never looked so suckable in her entire life. She didn’t care how much cum she had to swallow. She wanted it in her mouth, if only because it would give her some way to act on the sexual need she felt so strongly. And besides, if his cock was in her mouth, his hands would probably be on her as well. It wouldn’t take much to push her over the edge. As much as she had wanted this to be all about him, the state she was in was almost too much to take. Either it needed to ease up, or she needed to come. One or the other. Neither was happening with him across the room.

  “Please.” Good God, it sounded like she was begging. And begging for what exactly? For his touch? For his cock in her mouth? She never thought she’d beg for that, or even ask for it. Be willing, sure. Beg? Not a chance. Surely his ego was big enough without that.

  He shook his head.

  Now that was unfair. She bit her lip and tried again. “Please.”

  “Please what?”

  Please touch me. But that would show to him that even when she said it was his time, she was still totally selfish. She didn’t want him to think that. Hell, she didn’t want to be that way. Selfish had always been a way of protecting herself, getting her own in a world where everyone else was selfish too. Brett had proven he could put her pleasure first. She wanted to be able to do the same for him. “Please let me suck on your cock.”

  There. I said it. I don’t have to put on a front with him. Maybe I needed a man who could see right through me, in order to find out that I was better off being me.

  She saw his eyes widen in surprise, although just for a moment. Then he smiled. “I don’t think I can deny a request like that.” He walked over, his cock bouncing until he reached down to grip the shaft in front of his balls. She rolled on her side to face him, feeling the rope scratch across her clit as she did so. It wasn’t as rough as it could be, but it definitely wasn’t smooth either. Not comfortable. Intense.

  He opened the nightstand drawer. Reaching for a condom.

  She shook her head. “Please, no, Sir. I trust you, and you said you’ve been tested. I want to taste you.”

  He hesitated a moment. “You’re sure?”

  “Yes.”

  He held his cock as he guided it into her mouth. Without her hands free, she had no control. Once she opened her lips to take in the purplish head, he could slide his cock in as far as he wanted to. Even with his hand covering part of it, what was left still tickled the back of her throat. There was no way she could take the whole thing in.

  She breathed. His cock tasted of sweat and musk, much better than strawberry with a none too subtle undercurrent of latex. She squeezed her lips around him and was rewarded with a drop of saltiness onto the back of her tongue where she could barely taste it.

  “Don’t come until I do,” he said softly.

  She nodded, although maybe all he could see was her bobbing on his cock. The way her arms were tied, she could reach up and fold her hands around his cock, replacing his fist. He rocked his hips, sliding back, then into her again, fucking her mouth. She looked up at him, willing him to take even more control, to hold her head in his hands. She tried not to think of how her pussy was tingling and aching. She tried not to think about coming. Naturally, it didn’t work. She’d been so sure she couldn’t a moment before. Did having his cock in her mouth make that much of a difference? Or maybe it was that he told her she couldn’t. What she wanted to concentrate on was him and his pleasure. Just thinking about not coming wasn’t going to work. She thought about his cock, how it filled her and stretched her mouth, how it slid between her hands. How it felt to suck it in. How it almost made her gag, even with her hands covering the lower part. Her hands were smaller than his. They didn’t cover as much, and bound, she couldn’t stack them along his shaft. She moved her head forward as he thrust into her until it was nearly too much. Maybe that would distract her from coming.

  The moment she thought about what it was distracting her from, though, she almost came. The vibrator was still buzzing away, and she wasn’t entirely sure the butt plug hadn’t started vibrating too. It was impossible to sort out anymore. The vibe in her pussy made the ropes quiver, and the knot had slid to a particularly effective place against her clit. No, it hadn’t slid. He had reached down and given it a tug, damn him. If he wanted her to follow orders, he could make it easier for her.

  She looked up at him, intending to glare, and saw a look of concentration on his face. He was, she suspected, trying not to come. So much for making it easier on her. At least he was still rocking in her mouth. She wanted to push him over the edge. She licked his cock as it entered her, then sucked it in. She was so close. She wouldn’t be able to stop herself from coming forever, so she had to make him come.

  He grabbed the rope where the knot pressed against the belly button and wiggled it. For a blessed moment, it was off her clit. Then it was on again. He was moving it back and forth.

  I’m not going to last.

  Then he touched the back of her head and pulled her forward. It’s not up to me anymore. He has complete control. She was amazed at how relieved that made her feel. With him in charge, she knew she was going to be okay, whatever happened. She had to hold on as best she could. It made it easier somehow to succeed.

  His cock thickened in her mouth. She could feel his pulse beating against her tongue. And then she felt his cock twitch, and she could taste him. He burned like whiskey as he spurted down her throat, so intense that she lost her concentration on anything else. Maybe that pushed her over the edge, or it was the way he tugged on the rope, but either way, she came with him, her pussy squeezing and throbbing as she swallowed. His cock was all th
at stopped her from screaming at the violence of the sensations that ripped through her body. The plug in her ass felt like it was getting bigger, pulsing inside her, or maybe she was pulsing around it. The mixture of sensations confused her, but they made her toes curl and her hands tremble. She felt like sparks were traveling up the rope along her spine. The ropes around her breasts felt tighter. His hot seed seemed to numb the inside of her mouth. Everything was happening all at once.

  He pulled out of her and climbed up on the bed. It took her a moment to realize she could move her hands to wipe the wet bit that trickled onto her chin; she felt as if she was so bound she shouldn’t be able to, but that much she could do. She barely had time to do that before he pulled her to him, holding her close against his big, strong, very warm body. She shuddered as an aftershock went through her body. The vibrator was still humming away. If it had been her in control, it would have been out the moment she started coming or possibly before as she rubbed it against her clit to push her over. It felt more than strange having it still there, held by the rope.

  He moved her so that she was on top of him, lying on her back. His cock, pressing against her bottom, still felt big. He covered a breast with one hand, and he slipped his other downward, his fingers questing between her mound and the rope until they reached their destination. A few strokes on her clit was all it took to send her shuddering again, although it was softer this time. She moaned as she laid her head back against his corded neck.

  “Wow,” she said. It didn’t seem adequate, but it was all she could manage.

  “You’re amazing,” he said. “So responsive. So good.”

  “But it was supposed to be all about you.”

  “It was exactly what I wanted. Couldn’t be any more all about me, little kitty. If I felt like telling you that you couldn’t come, I would have. I happen to enjoy your reactions.” He kissed her neck. She felt the vibrator slipping out of her into his hand, and then a moment later it stopped buzzing. “And I get what I want.”

  “What do you want?” she asked.

  “You.”

  “Hmm.” She grinned and couldn’t hold back her next comment, although she didn’t think it was very submissive. “Right answer.”

  He laughed.

  She lay back against him, feeling the rise and fall of his chest and listening to him breathe. “Are you going to untie me now?”

  “No.”

  She blinked. She hadn’t expected that. Maybe “in a minute” while he caught his breath, but not a simple no. She twisted to look at him.

  “I like the way you look in rope. I might untie your hands and legs when you need them. The rest? No.”

  “I have practice with Cindy tomorrow afternoon.”

  He laughed again, a big chuckle that seemed to rumble from his chest. She loved his laugh; it was the opposite of a giggle, entirely masculine. “I won’t keep you tied up that long. But there’s nothing wrong with rope under your dress at dinner.”

  There wasn’t? She supposed the right dress might conceal it, but she’d still feel like everyone must know.

  He rolled her over to face him, and the butt plug shifted inside her. “I suppose that thing in my ass is staying too?” she asked.

  “Yes, love.”

  He called her love. Some men could use the word that way to complete strangers, but she was sure he’d never called her that before. She searched his face for something more but couldn’t read him. She wondered what it meant. Maybe nothing. Maybe a lot. She shouldn’t care so much, but she did. She wanted him in her bed, over and over again. And in her life. Even if she spent a bunch of it in rope.

  It took her a moment to remember what he’d said yes to. To the butt plug staying. Dammit.

  But maybe, she thought with a smile, it really is about him after all. She didn’t know why that made her feel happy, but it did. I’m a cynical hard-bitten punk rock singer. She knew it had never been true. She’d given her all to help the band, until they kicked her out. Even then, she’d wanted them to succeed. She’d tried to love Angus until he made it impossible. She’d gone along on the copyrights way back when because she wanted to make things work more than she wanted to get her own. And now she was doing it again, wanting someone else’s pleasure as much or more than she wanted her own. It hadn’t worked out very well before, which is why she’d thought she’d learned.

  He was watching her, obviously aware her thoughts had taken a turn. She expected him to demand to know what they were. Instead he waited, patiently. The silence grew awkward. Or at least she thought it was awkward.

  This is who I am. This relationship is worth the risk of being myself. And so is the band with Cindy. Getting burned isn’t going to change who I am.

  “You look very determined,” he said at last.

  “Yes, Master. I am.”

  Chapter Eight

  New York City

  Brett sat at a table with a perfect view of the stage. Katrina had been apologetic about the fact the gig was for the last day of their week, but thankfully, she hadn’t offered not to go. He knew how important it was for her, and as much as he liked being in charge, he was glad Kat had known where her priorities needed to be.

  She was wearing a blue corset that he had made, and she looked wonderful in it. He’d had material left from the other one, and he’d made one special for her. It was looser than he usually made them, and it used plastic boning instead of steel, to make sure she could sing and it would still look neatly tied in the back. It was the only corset he’d ever made that was more decorative than functional, although he liked to think they were all both. She’d set it off with a blue spangled mini and ripped fishnets. She looked like a punk goddess. She sang like an angel.

  And tonight I get to fuck you, hard. He remembered how she’d squealed the night before, when he’d tied the steel-boned corset extratight. He’d taken her out to eat after and had almost told her he loved her right then and there. It had been on his lips again before the concert, but he hadn’t wanted to distract her from an important performance. She’d told him that Martine’s was the coolest small venue in New York right now. It wasn’t a chance that came very often. Part of what made Martine’s successful was their knack for getting hot new acts before they went national, and they’d called after the reviews from the DC performance started spreading through the Internet. He wanted her to be able to do her best.

  He watched her bend over. The corset made her ample breasts look even more ample, and no doubt the men in the crowd appreciated it. Look all you want. She’s mine. He’d come all over those tits two nights ago, back in DC. His gaze traveled to where she was bending. He thought about how she’d bent over the night before that. He’d spanked her and then brought her to orgasm like that. And then she’d come again in his arms. He loved the way she looked when she came, and the moans she made were music to his ears.

  “What are you thinking?” asked Amy. The little brunette sat across from him. They’d become acquainted when he’d come to practices. He wasn’t sure if they were friends or not, but he thought maybe they were becoming so. He wasn’t going to share all his thoughts, however.

  “Okay,” said Amy. “Same thing every other man is thinking. And some of the women.”

  Brett wondered if Amy was included in that group and glanced over at her. But Amy’s eyes were on Cindy. He smiled. A couple in love was a beautiful thing. The world was changing, and someday soon Amy and Cindy would be able to get married if they wanted to. They could now, if they did it out of state.

  He never imagined himself married, but suddenly it didn’t seem like such a foreign idea for him either. It wasn’t the sort of thing that one jumped into after a week, but he knew he wanted Katrina in his life for a long time.

  “Well, since I’m transparent, what are you thinking?” he asked Amy.

  “It’s interesting, isn’t it? Watching the two people we love, knowing they share a special bond we’ll never really be able to share or be a part of.”

>   He hadn’t really thought of it that way, but maybe that was because Cindy was a woman. He’d definitely felt a pang of jealousy when he’d seen Angus sitting with Katrina in the strip club. When he’d walked away he’d wished he could play a guitar as well as he could defend a client, but he knew that even if he’d spent all his life practicing he’d never have that kind of talent. He’d had a cello when he was in junior high. His mother had been as encouraging and patient as any mother could be. The orchestra director had taken him aside and suggested that maybe his talents might lie with a foreign language. Spanish was offered at the same time, and he’d taken the hint.

  “Cindy loves you,” he said with conviction.

  “Yes. And I’m happy for her. She’s always wanted this, and now Kat has given it to her. Kat’s so very talented and sexy. There are times when Cindy looks like she’s in heaven, you know, and then she makes the guitar scream like she’s, well…” Amy turned her face away.

  “Like she’s having an orgasm.”

  “Yes.” Amy looked back at him and stuck out her tongue.

  “When they walk off the stage, though, they are all ours. What say I abscond with Kat, so you can have some good couple time with Cindy?”

  Amy smiled. “That sounds perfect. No wonder Kat loves you.”

  “My motivations are entirely selfish.”

  “Sometimes selfish is good.”

  Onstage, Cindy stepped forward and leaned into Kat and sang a couple of lines of “Invaded” with her, a song from Kradle’s first album. Angus had withdrawn the cease and desist order. Back payments were supposedly in the mail. Justice, for a change, had been remarkably fast. Kat put her arm around Cindy and pressed so close their cheeks touched. He glanced back at Amy and saw a look of pain cross her face. He wished he had the words to take it away, but he couldn’t.