Love Lost, Love Found

by Judy Kentrus

  “Oh, well, that makes it all right. You’re forgetting he communicates through the Internet, and any good hacker can locate you. What’s your online name at this dating site?”

  Nancy looked down at her folded hands buried in her lap and lowered her voice. “Lovely Purple Iris.”

  “That’s from Delta Phi Epsilon, your sorority.”

  “Yes, and he was in Sigma Phi Epsilon, the same fraternity as you. Rather than use a picture, he put up their burning-heart symbol. That’s what attracted me to him. I used a unicorn for our sister sorority.”

  “How old is this guy? Maybe he was in my class.”

  “No, he’s sixty. A widower and a lawyer.”

  “And you’ve been communicating with him for over a year. How much does he know about you?”

  “Just about everything other than my real name, my law firm and where I live.”

  “Hell, I don’t even know where you live other than in Beacon Pointe, New Jersey. Did you confess to only wearing lacy thongs from Victoria’s Secret and satin teddies?”

  “Of course not, you pervert.” She laughed and punched him lightly in the arm. “Only you would remember something like that.”

  “The gorgeous memory is fresh in my mind. Okay, enough teasing. I have no right to tell you how to choose your friends. I’m just asking you to be careful. Are you going to tell him about us?”

  “I don’t know.” She really didn’t.

  “Fair enough. What are your plans for tomorrow?”

  “Don’t you have work to do, like check on your baseball stadium project?”

  “I’ll be working tonight, and I’ve a FaceTime meeting tomorrow morning and another meeting later in the week.”

  “If you care to join me, I’m going to the Naples Zoo after lunch.”

  They exited the car and strolled down the paths bordered by colorful flowers and fanlike shrubs. Bird song could be heard high above their heads.

  “So you’re actually playing tourist?”

  Nancy was getting much too comfortable holding his hand. “These were the plans I made with Blue Steel when we were supposed to meet. He’s really into monkeys and is studying their mating habits.”

  “Mating habits?” Sean repeated, lifting a brow. “I don’t like this guy already.”

  “You don’t have to. So are you going with me tomorrow?”

  “I’ll pick you up at your villa at one. Can we plan to have dinner tomorrow night? I’ve something very special in mind.”

  “Is it fancy? I bought a cocktail dress.”

  “We’ll be eating on the beach, so anything Caribbean-style would be good. Sandals preferable.”

  “On the beach? Like a luau?”

  “Nope, a sit-down, elegant dinner. Bring some type of wrap because it can be cool on the beach, but they have lights and heaters. Reservations to eat at the Turtle Club while the sun is going down are premium. It’s part of the Vanderbilt Beach Resort in Naples. Since I visit here three or four times a year, I make mine months in advance.”

  “Sounds very nice.” Nancy paused before her front door, wondering how she should handle this awkward moment. Kiss or no kiss? Sean made the decision for her and used his body to urge her against the closed door, but he didn’t lower his mouth. He used the tip of his finger to gently outline her lips. She was unable to move, but the rapid beat of her heart confirmed she was very much alive.

  “I can remember walking home from class, and my mind would be consumed with all the work I had to do. The elevator in our building was broken, and I’d hurry up the four flights of wooden steps. Your classes got out earlier than mine. No matter what you were doing, you would greet me at the door with a big smile, jump up and wrap your arms and legs around me before giving me a very loving kiss. Those are the simple things that I loved about us.”

  “Me, too,” she murmured before she rested her head against his breastbone. His shirt felt soft and had a clean, earthy scent. “The stairs creaked, and I knew you were coming. Then you would carry me over to the ratty green couch, and we would snuggle. Sometimes we couldn’t get our clothes off fast enough, and we’d make love. Oh, Sean, what happened to us?”

  He lifted her chin with his finger, but still didn’t kiss her. “You said we can’t go back, but there is nothing wrong with remembering who and what we were.”

  She was disappointed when he stepped away to relieve the pressure on her body.

  “Now that I’ve planted that beautiful memory in your head and have given myself the beginnings of a very uncomfortable hard-on, I’ll leave our first real second-chance kiss up to you.” He winked before he turned away. “See you tomorrow at one o’clock. Enjoy your cyberdate with Blue Band.”

  “That’s Blue Steel!”

  Chapter 4

  Nancy set up her laptop on the kitchen table before preparing a cup of herbal tea. She needed to check her email to see if she’d gotten anything from Adams Security and Investigations, the firm that was doing a deep search on the company that wanted to put up the ugly monstrosity of a hotel and conference center across from her beach in Beacon Pointe. She’d contacted Lincoln Adams, the owner of the security company, directly. She’d become close friends with his mother-in-law, a fellow lawyer, when they attended a seminar. Lincoln Adams, her son-in-law, had been a keynote speaker. She and Kaitlyn had attended his wedding a year ago. As requested, she’d sent Kaitlyn her daily three-word message: “I am fine.” She’d debated mentioning Sean, but decided to keep him to herself, for now.

  She took a few contemplative sips of tea, staring at the blank screen. Her next message would be to Blue Steel. Ordinarily, she’d be looking forward to their chats, but tonight guilt had replaced that eagerness. She always enjoyed communicating with him, but just one day with Sean and her world was turned upside down. She had more control over dealing with murderers and thieves than she did handling her reawakened feelings for Sean Patrick Harrigan. She’d lost him once. Was this her chance to discover if they could make a life together? Maybe she was jumping the gun. Hell, she didn’t even know where he lived or what his life had been like during the years they’d been apart.

  It wouldn’t be fair to keep Sean’s presence in her life a secret from her online friend. He already knew she’d lived with someone going through law school and that he’d walked away. She and Blue Steel hadn’t made any promises. It was an easy friendship between them.

  She started to type, but the glint of her gold wedding band drew her attention. “Nelson, what am I doing?” she said as warm tears slid down her cheeks. “You always told me to weigh a situation and I’d make the right decision. You accepted the hold Sean had on my heart, but you married me anyway. I did love you, but in a different way, and we were happy. Wearing your ring is a reminder that we had a wonderful life together. If and when I do take it off, know you will always hold a special place in my heart.”

  She signed into her special email account and typed her message to Blue Steel.

  Hi, hope you are feeling better.

  Hi, Iris. You’ve brightened my painful day. Just one request: Don’t make me laugh because of the pain in my ribs. My leg is in traction. I’ll be going to a rehab center the end of the week.”

  Okay, no jokes, I promise.

  How is paradise?

  The place is gorgeous. Glad you suggested. Sorry you couldn’t be here. Went to Naples to do some shopping. Going to the zoo just like we planned.

  I’m sorry you have to go alone.

  She’d boxed herself into a corner dealing with two men, and she didn’t want to lie. It could come back to bite her in the end.

  Blue, I’ve always been honest with you, so there is something I want you to know. Remember the guy I lived with when I was going to law school? He’s staying at the resort. We’ve reconnected, and we’re testing the waters.

  That must have come as quite a shock. I could say while the mouse is away, the cat will play, but that isn’t the case since we are just good friends who have never met i
n person. I enjoy chatting with you and hope you will continue our cyber friendship.

  I look forward to communicating with you, and that isn’t about to change. I want to be honest and tell you he’s playing tourist with me and taking me to dinner.

  He certainly didn’t waste any time renewing your friendship. How did it feel coming face-to-face with someone who put his career before your love?

  It was a total shock. He was playing volleyball, something he always loved. He showed up this morning and poured his heart out, saying he wants me back in his life. He accompanied me to Naples. After a few hours together, we slipped into a familiar groove. He remembered my favorite candy and flowers.

  Iris, I hate to burst your bubble, but something feels off. After what, twenty or more years, he suddenly shows up in your life and wants to pick up where you left off?

  He admitted that walking away from me was the biggest mistake of his life.

  Of course he’s going to say what you and your heart want to hear. If he’s accomplished everything he set out to do, you’re the one thing missing in his life, like a trophy. Find out what you can about him, and whatever you do, guard your heart. He broke it once before, or am I preaching to the choir?

  If you’re asking if I still love him, I honestly don’t know. He reminds me of the things we did together, very intimate moments.

  Sounds like a real slick character who wants to get you into bed again. How long is he staying?

  I’m not sure, probably the full two weeks. His villa is very close to mine.

  No, the situation is too pat. Guard your heart and don’t let him talk you into anything, especially bed. Going to be saying good night. Time for my medicine that puts me out like a light. Don’t forget to visit the monkeys.

  Night, Blue, thanks for listening. Feel better.

  “That went a lot smoother than I expected,” she said and moved to look out at the moon-brightened beach, debating whether to go for a walk. In the end, she decided to make it an early night after she put away her purchases, which had arrived earlier in the evening. She was looking forward to going out tomorrow night and decided the gold dress would be perfect.

  She’d just made herself comfortable under the sheet when her cell phone rang. It was Sean. He’d asked for her number, and she’d given it to him without hesitation. Her heart said, Talk to him, but she let the call go to voice mail. She was already falling under his spell, but Blue’s words of caution gave her pause. “One day at a time,” she said and turned out the light.

  Sean sat on a lounge chair just outside his villa and watched the lights go out next door, disappointed that she didn’t answer the phone. One day, just one day, and he’d been happier than he’d been in a very long time. He’d wanted to ask her to go for a walk along the beach, but he would save that for another night.

  He’d spent the evening sending emails, reviewing proposals for future investments, anything to keep his mind off of Nancy. Normally, he found pleasure in his work, but he’d found a happier place thinking about the woman who was going to make all his dreams come true.

  The breeze off the beach chilled his arms and legs, but it felt good. The sky overhead was a velvet blanket of glittering stars, and gentle waves kissed the shore, the perfect scenario for lovers. They’d never made love on the beach, and an idea formed in his head. No, they couldn’t pick up where they left off, and they were different people now, but the best way to reach Nancy was to remind her of what they had been to each other. Time was running short, and he needed to capitalize on every moment they were together. Breaching her wall of mistrust was paramount.

  “Why exactly did we come to the Naples Zoo?” Sean asked after they got their hands stamped and walked into the exhibit area the following afternoon.

  “Blue Steel and I talked about things to do when we planned the trip, and he mentioned going to the zoo.”

  “So, basically, I’m a standin date for Bluegill.”

  “I’m going to ignore your sarcasm,” Nancy said as they walked down the winding path through the exhibits. They passed young families pushing strollers while others pulled rental wagons that accommodated two small children. Their squeals of delight blended with the screeches of the exotic birds.

  “Everything is so fresh and alive; it reminds me of a rain forest. The shrubs and trees are so ornate.”

  “Some of the plants in the tropical garden were first planted in 1919 and made up the botanical gardens of Henry Nehrling. After his death, it was reopened as a zoo in 1969.

  They paused before the black bear exhibit. The huge animal was less than eight feet away and was protected from humans by a thick Plexiglas viewing window. He meandered back and forth as if he didn’t have a care in the world within the huge fenced in area.

  She took Sean’s hand before they moved along the path to the next exhibit. “You seem awfully knowledgeable about the place.

  “I visit every time I come to Naples.”

  “You like coming here and just didn’t want me to know.”

  “I’ll tell you why, but you can’t laugh.”

  “Now you really have me intrigued,” she said.

  “I like to feed the giraffes.”

  Nancy paused and her eyes opened wide in disbelief. “Really?”

  “Yes, really. What’s so wrong with a grown man liking giraffes?”

  “Nothing. I think it’s very sweet. Thank you for sharing that with me. It shows kindness in your heart.”

  He tugged on her hand so that they continued walking. “Now you really make me feel uncomfortable. There is a stand by the exhibit and for two dollars, they give you three leaves of Romaine lettuce and these gentle creatures eat right out of your hand.”

  “It’s something I’ve never done and would enjoy experiencing with you.”

  “I’d like that very much. After that, I hope you’re up for a boat ride. The primates are housed on islands in a man-made lake so we’ll be going on the Primate Expedition Cruise.

  “I promised Blue Steel I would visit the primates.”

  “I should have purchased another ticket since he is so much a part of this trip.”

  “Very funny. He must be growing on you because you didn’t sneer. I promise not to bring his name up the rest of the day.”

  “Deal, now let’s go feed the giraffes.”

  They both enjoyed feeding the gentle creatures and Nancy was sorry she didn’t bring her phone to capture the moment. The pleasure on Sean’s face when he held up the leaf of romaine to the long-neck beauty would forever remain in her heart.

  The boat ride was also enjoyable and the guide was very knowledgeable about the different primates and their mating habits. Blue Steel’s name wasn’t mentioned.

  They were almost at the end of their self-guided tour when they were approached by a park photographer and asked if they wanted to have their picture taken.

  “I’d like that, but we have to do this right. Could you please wait a moment?” Nancy asked to the young woman.

  She hurried into the nearby gift shop and purchased two souvenir safari hats, one for a lady and one for man and hurried back to Sean and the photographer.

  “We have to wear these in honor of feeding the giraffes.”

  This time he did smirk and reluctantly put the hat on his head. “For you and giraffes, I’ll wear the silly hat.”

  Arm and arm they posed for the picture, but didn’t look into the camera. They shared smiles and looked into each other’s eyes.

  “That was great,” the photographer said. “You can pick up your photo in the gift shop near the register. By the way, it’s been a long time since I’ve seen a couple look at each other the way you two did. The love you have for each other shown in your smiles and eyes.”

  They purchased two copies and put them in frames with a Safari-like print. The moment she got in the car, Nancy took one of the photos out of the bag and studied their smiling faces. She silently agreed with what the photographer had pointed out.

&
nbsp; “I really like this picture of us and it says a lot.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “This has nothing to do with our past. Let’s consider it the first new memory we’ve made together.”

  “I like that, Nancy Jean. A new start.”

  They barely made it home in time to change for their five thirty dinner reservation. Nancy looked in the mirror over the bathroom sink and applied a little more berry red lipstick. Tonight was going to be special and she wanted to look nice for Sean. She’d drawn her hair up to the side and held it in place with a coppery gold clip, leaving her right shoulder bare. It also showed off her lacy, leaf-shaped earrings that brushed the tip of her chin. The sarong-like wrap with an over-the-shoulder shawl, was as Caribbean as she could get. The deep gold color of the dress against her tanned skin was a perfect combination to make Sean eat his heart out.

  When he knocked on the front door of the villa, her face brightened in a smile.

  “Right on time, as usual.”

  He stepped inside and she appreciated the way his eyes moved slowly up and down her poised form. “Am I overdressed?”

  “Wow, you take my breath away, but something is missing.” He brought his hand from around his back and held out a gorgeous red Mimosa flower.

  “Tell me you didn’t pick this off the bush outside my door,” she said and cradled the beautiful bloom in her hand. “You look very nice too.” The expensive cut of his navy sports jacket molded to his broad shoulders. He’d paired an open neck sage-green shirt and cream colored slacks. Brown, doeskin slip-ons completed his savvy attire.

  “I did. Since I’m technically your client, you are sworn to secrecy. I think it would go lovely in your hair. Allow me.” Sean hesitated. “Not that I want to be presumptuous, left side or right? She knew exactly what he was asking; the right side said she was looking for love. “Right.”

  “Thank God,” he said with a sigh of relief.

  Nancy held perfectly still while he put the flower on the side of her head nearest the clip. Standing this close, his Armani cologne overpowered the fragrance of the flower. She rested her hands on the lapels of his jacket while he admired his handiwork.