by Morgan Fox
A sudden nervousness churned in her belly and a cold chill washed over her. “Gavin,” she whispered, placing her hand on his forearm.
His gaze snapped to hers. “I know you slept with him. I heard everything.”
She knelt before him. The pain on his face, the betrayal, stole her breath. “Gavin, I can explain.”
He shook his head, pinching her chin between his forefinger and thumb. “I don’t want to hear it.” He jerked his hand away from her face and rose to his full height, forcing her to stand. Her breath caught as she stared up at him, her heart dropping into her stomach. “If you want him so badly, then maybe you should’ve just stayed in his dimension. Maybe his people can protect you from that fucking demon, because I’m sure the hell not.” His eyes widened and his mouth curved into a deepening frown. “I can’t even bare to look at you right now.” He moved to leave, but Shadow grabbed his arm. He yanked it away from her. “Don’t ever touch me again. You are not my mate.” His teeth were clenched, his jaw flexing under immense strain. “You don’t want me and I no longer want you.”
“Gavin,” she gasped.
He leaned closer, his wolf snarling from deep within him. She trembled as his eyes revealed so much she never wanted to see. She swallowed as his warm breath fell upon her cheek. “My true mate would never have betrayed me.”
The coldness of his words left her numb. As he stepped back from her, she stared after him. Her heart froze in her chest. Gavin had denounced her as his mate in front of Silence, Walker, Lance, and Julian. Never had she imagined that he would do such a thing.
No matter the words spoken between them, their wolves would still crave one another. Gavin had sealed their fate and they would suffer the torment of never being whole. He’d chosen to be without her, leaving her no choice but to be without him.
“Gavin, please don’t do this.” She was practically on her knees again, crawling after him.
He ignored her, moving for the door, but as he clasped the knob it wouldn’t budge. He turned back to send a fierce glare at her. “Tell your boy toy to open this fucking door now.”
Julian put his hands up. “I’m not doing anything,” he said, stepping away from Shadow.
Everything inside her was telling him not to leave and since she couldn’t make him do what she wanted she was somehow blocking his exit. She scurried back, sucking in a breath as he charged at her. She drew her hand up to press against his chest as he hauled her up onto her feet.
“Open the door,” he said to her, his voice low and menacing.
She shook her head and breathed, “No.”
He took hold of her shoulders, shaking her slightly. “Damn it, Shadow, open the fucking door.” His voice grew louder, his touch more aggressive.
“You can hurt me all you want, Gavin.” Tears flooded her eyes. “I don’t want you to leave.”
He shoved her back. “Why,” he snapped. “You don’t want me. You want him.” Gavin pointed a determined finger in Julian’s direction. “It’s always been him.”
“No,” she shouted, her fists clenching at her sides. “That’s not true.”
Both Gavin and Julian stared at her with brows furrowed. She swallowed the emotions racing up her throat. Her heart slammed against her ribs.
Emotionally defeated, she dropped down onto the sofa and rested her elbows on her knees, covering her face with her hands. She battled with the truth, hating that she was no different from her sister.
Her body erupted into flames as she confessed the desires of her heart. “It’s not a matter of him or you,” she muttered. “I want you both.”
Gavin scoffed. “Well that’s just great,” he blurted, stomping his boot against the hardwood floor. “Why didn’t you just say so?” He paced the room, his thunderous steps making her tremble. He turned to face her once more. “What if I don’t want you?”
Her gaze shot up to meet his. Her heart sank to the pit of her stomach. The thought of losing Gavin had a rush of panic shooting through her. She’d hoped he would at least consider a world with her than without her. She bit her bottom lip, fighting the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes.
She stood, her mouth opened, but not a single word would come out. What was she supposed to say to that? How was she supposed to convince him to stay if he truly didn’t want to?
Gavin ran a stiff hand over his face and muttered through clenched teeth, “What if the idea of him touching you makes me stark raving mad?” His loathsome gaze settled on Julian.
Her bottom lip quivered. Everything inside her told her she had to fight for Gavin. Her wolf begged her to make him understand how much she needed him, wanted him. But there was a part of her that had no idea what to say to make him believe her. Gavin was too angry. He wouldn’t listen. He wouldn’t care.
She closed her eyes and sucked in a calming breath. Her heart and mind had reached an agreement and she owed that to Gavin and Julian. She’d been running from everything most of her life, now she had a damn good excuse to finally do what she’d always threatened she would.
“The way I see it, it’s pretty simple. You don’t want to be here with me and you certainly don’t want anything to do with Julian.” Her tone was cold and even as she spoke. “If I’m not enough reasons for you to want to stay, then you should go.”
With slumped shoulders, she exited the room, passing Silence’s watchful eyes. She didn’t care who saw the unraveling dysfunction of her life. She was retreating to her room to pack. Shadow Meadows was no longer her home. As long as she didn’t have Gavin and Julian, there was no reason to stay.
Chapter 9
Julian knew he shouldn’t do it, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself. Stiffening, he reached out and took Gavin by the arm. “Are you happy now?”
Gavin glanced down at Julian’s fingers and he released his hold as if his hand had suddenly caught fire.
Gavin meet his gaze. “Why would I be happy?”
“You got what you wanted,” Julian said, matter-of-factly.
Gavin’s brow furrowed. “You have some nerve.” He chewed on the words as he stepped closer to Julian.
Julian arched his neck to stare up at Gavin. He was tall. Gavin was taller. “I’m only stating a fact,” Julian replied. “You told her that you didn’t want her, that you didn’t want your own mate even after hearing that she wanted you.” He swallowed hard.
Gavin shoved Julian, shouting, “But wanting me comes with a price.”
Julian hadn’t known what the outcome would be like once Gavin learned of the affair. Selfishly he hadn’t cared. But seeing the pain in Shadow’s eyes and knowing how much she cared for them both nearly destroyed him. “So if you can’t have her”—Julian’s hand tingled with magic powered by the sudden anger charging inside him—“no one can?”
Gavin’s nostrils flared wide as he breathed. “Should I feel bad for what the two of you did behind my back?” He shoved Julian again, forcing him to take another step backward. “Do you even realize that while you were fucking my mate, I was getting my ass kicked?” Another shove. “Do you even care that you are the cause of ruining the life I had planned for her? I would’ve given her anything, done anything for her.” This time when Gavin shoved him, the backs of Julian’s knees hit the end table behind him.
Julian’s heart beat heavy for the woman he loved. “Why can’t you forgive her?”
Rage consumed Gavin’s soul as he cried, “Because of you!”
Gavin’s fist connected with Julian’s jaw. The force sent Julian flying up over the table. Julian’s reflexes were sharp. He landed in a crouched position on the floor. As he did, Gavin was already on him. His fists were flying at Julian so fast that Julian had little to no time to avoid them. Julian winced as another hit sent him slamming against the wall behind him. A puff of dust surrounded him as his body crushed through the drywall, cracking with the imprint of his body.
Julian’s veins pulsed with his magic. He fought to avoid using it. He didn’t want to hurt
Gavin, so he simply orbed out of the way. Gavin ran headlong into the wall where Julian had once stood. Twisting with a savage anger, Gavin spotted him standing at the opposite end of the room.
“Do you really want to do this? I can orb all day long, big guy. I’m really not into physical combat.”
Gavin picked up the nearest lamp and tossed it across the room. Again Julian orbed and the lamp smashed against the wall. When Julian appeared, Gavin threw something else at him and he quickly avoided it. Gavin did this several times.
“Why are we still playing this game?” Julian said, frustration consuming him.
A log from the fire whipped at his head and Julian orbed instantly, but this time when he reappeared, Gavin’s hands clasped around his throat. The wolf was visible in Gavin’s eyes as were his fierce fangs and claws.
Julian couldn’t breathe as Gavin set down on him, his fingers gripping around his neck with a purpose.
“You might have magic funneling through your veins, fae prince, but I’m an alpha and I’ve got skills you only wish you could have.” Gavin’s lips pulled back from his clenched white teeth. “I should tear you apart.” Gavin snapped his jaws as if he intended to bite Julian. “I could slice your neck open with the flick of my finger.”
“But you won’t,” Silence whispered, from over his shoulder. “You know it would destroy Shadow if anything happened to either of one of you.” She gently slid her hands down Gavin’s arms and rested her fingers overtop of his, encouraging him to release Julian’s throat. “You know you don’t want to do this, Gavin.” She pressed her face to his ear and softly kissed him. “Let him go, honey.”
Everything slowed around him as he waited for Silence’s words to have some effect. After what felt like an eternity, Gavin hesitantly released him. Gasping, Julian rolled to his side, sucking in air that burned like fire to his lungs. Gavin could’ve easily killed him and he wouldn’t have blamed him if he had.
“Why did you stop him?” Julian asked, choking and clearing his throat.
He knew Silence was Gavin’s best friend and she’d never hid her mixed emotions about Julian in Shadow’s life. He was curious to learn why she hadn’t allowed Gavin the pleasure of killing the man responsible for coming between him and his mate, as well as her and her sister.
Gavin rose to his feet and stalked out of the room, not casting a single glance back toward Julian.
Silence stiffened her spine. “Gavin’s not a murderer. He protects the people he cares about.” Silence turned to leave the room, but before she did she inclined her head back in Julian’s direction. “Even if you deserve the biggest ass kicking I could give you, it would never be enough.” She met his gaze head-on. “You knew what you were doing, when you took Shadow back to your world. You knew that this thing was coming for her and still you didn’t warn any of us.” She stepped closer to Julian and as she did, both Walker and Lance came up to stand beside her. “Why?”
Julian swallowed. “I figured Eblis would follow me. He’s from my world and he knows that I’ve been protecting you both since you were children.”
Silence arched a brow. “Why would we need protecting?” Before he could answer, she asked, “What did Eblis mean when he said that our parents made a pact with him?”
Julian sighed heavily, lifting himself off the floor and sitting in the chair closest to him. “I was not privileged to the exact details of the agreement, but from what I’ve gathered over the years, our parents needed a way to end the feud with Eblis and his army of demons. They were destroying my home and the portal that linked our worlds was in jeopardy.” His chest tightened as he remembered the many friends and warriors who had been killed to keep the portal closed to the demons. “My people have always protected Earth.”
Silence’s eyes widened as she folded her arms over her chest. “Until now.”
That was true, but if Silence and her mates knew the sacrifices his people made to ensure the safety of all humankind, they would be less likely to throw him into the fire as he felt they were doing now. Julian steeled himself, both proud of his people and fearful of their current situation.
“Eblis was the first demon to ever escape through the portal.”
“That’s not very reassuring,” Walker said plainly. “If he did it, more of his kind could.”
Lance added, “And since we were unable to subdue Eblis, there’s no telling when he’ll be back.”
“Do you have any idea where he is?” Walker asked.
Julian’s gaze moved from Lance to Walker, and with an understanding nod, he returned his gaze back to Silence. “I believe our parents thought there would be time to destroy Eblis and his army. But your parents were killed before any of that could be done.”
Silence’s brows drew in tight. “My parents offered Shadow to him as payment for peace?”
With a heavy sigh, Julian nodded. “She was supposed to have been my bride.”
Silence gasped. “What are you talking about?”
Julian’s mouth had suddenly gone dry. In all the years he’d known Shadow was to be his, he never imagined he’d be so uncomfortable when the time actually came. Somehow he’d figured the event would be more private and official. He licked his lips.
“Our parents were close friends. Your mother was powerful and shared a bond with the fae people. Shadow demonstrated the same type of power. You were so much like your father.” He smiled softly, the memory of their youths flooding his thoughts. “I’d spent every summer with you for years. Do you not remember why?”
Silence shook her head.
“Our parents wanted a bond to be forged between me and Shadow, to align our families naturally and ensure that there would always be a guardian to keep the portal protected on Earth. I was chosen to be that guardian.”
Gavin cleared his throat as he reentered the room. His dark eyes pierced him deep. “It just keeps getting better,” Gavin said in a guttural tone, rolling his eyes at Julian. “So even if I still want Shadow, you’re never going to leave.”
Julian’s jaw ticked. There was nothing in the world that could separate him from Shadow. She was his everything, his duty, his heart. He gave his head one curt shake and said, “No, lycan. I’m never leaving her.”
* * * *
Gavin didn’t think he could take much more. Worse still, he didn’t think he could live without Shadow in his life. His heart did an awkward flip against his ribs and his gut painfully twisted. He swallowed back the foul taste that crept up his throat. Balling his hands into tight fists, he stormed from the house. His booted heels crunched down on the fallen leaves and twigs that littered the ground. He inhaled the largest gulp of air his lungs could hold and then closed his eyes and tilted his chin up toward the moonless sky.
The sounds of the welcoming night were thriving in the woods around him. The chirping of the crickets, the rustling of leaves from the small nocturnal animals out in search of food, everything surrounding him was alive and new. The power of the night forced his eyes open. He loved the feel of twilight, the moment just before darkness swallowed up all the eyes could see. It reminded him of the passion he’d felt from Shadow the night they’d made love as mates. The night he realized he could never be without her.
Frustration consumed him as he thought about the jealousy he felt over Shadow’s attraction to Julian. Even after watching his best friend, Silence, become overpowered by the attraction of two men, unable to decide which one she loved more, he didn’t like the fact that he was now in Walker’s shoes.
Somehow Walker had been able to forgive Silence for betraying him, for loving Lance, and for aligning herself with another who wasn’t him.
How had Walker been able to do it?
Everything inside him screamed to kill Julian, eliminate him from the equation altogether. But damn it he couldn’t. Shadow would never be with a man who could so easily murder in cold blood. His chest tightened as he considered just walking away, something he’d already threatened to do.
He
ran a stiff hand through his hair, realizing that somewhere between the ass kicking he received from Eblis, and now, he’d misplaced his Stetson. He felt naked without it. But honestly, what made him feel most vulnerable was the idea of being without the woman who’d always possessed his heart. No matter how many women he bedded, there would never be another who could consume him like she did, infuriate him so easily.
Gavin’s footsteps froze. His eyes locked on the bedroom window where Shadow lingered. He hadn’t even realized he’d moved from the front of the house. It seemed that even his subconscious mind couldn’t stand being parted from her.
As he watched her, he noticed the suitcases lying on the bed and her repeated trips in and out of the closet, dumping more and more of her belonging inside the luggage. Tears flooded her cheeks. He bit the inside of his mouth. Shadow was truly leaving this time.
For years, she’d talked about leaving Silent Falls, but he never believed that she’d actually do it. The muscles of his jaw flexed and tightened under the strain of his rising anger. He shouldn’t care that she was leaving. Shit, he’d basically told her to. But standing outside the window of her room, he couldn’t help but want to force her to stay.
I want you both. Shadow’s words haunted him, setting him on fire with jealousy and forcing him to make a decision.
“Fuck,” he groaned, moving toward the window and pushing it open. He kicked his leg over the window ledge and hopped inside.
Shadow’s startled gasp drew his attention. He left the window open and rested his rear against the window ledge and kicked his booted feet out in front of him, crossing them at the ankles.
Shadow wiped her damp cheeks on her shoulders and resumed her packing, trying her best to ignore him. Her vulnerable emptiness bit into him. He could sense her alarming despair, her heartbreak.
What about my heart? Does she even care what she’s doing to me?
He clenched his teeth and groaned. “I shouldn’t feel like the bad guy here,” he said, hoping that she’d stop fumbling about the room and talk to him.