Size Matters

by Alison Bliss

  Leah cringed and swallowed the lump forming in her throat.

  “Actually, it was all my fault,” Sam said, shaking his head. “For a guy who measures shit for a living, you’d think I wouldn’t have screwed that part up.”

  Her father gave Sam a firm pat on the shoulder. “Aw, hell, don’t worry about it, son. An engagement ring isn’t nearly as important as the person who’s wearing it.”

  “You got that right, Bill.” He grabbed Leah’s hand, which was sitting on top of the table this time, and squeezed it again. “And I think the world of your daughter. She’s an amazing girl with a great personality.”

  If that wasn’t the worst compliment a guy could give a fat girl, then Leah didn’t know what was. Next he’d be telling her parents how he met her in the bar.

  “So how did the two of you meet, Sam?” her mother asked.

  Damn. Leah tried to intervene. “We met at a—”

  “Honey, don’t interrupt. It’s rude. I was talking to Sam.”

  Crap.

  He must’ve seen the worry flash across Leah’s face because he slid his arm around her shoulders and shook her a little. “It’s okay, sweetheart. Believe it or not, I do remember how we first met.” Then he smiled wide, and she knew exactly what he was about to say.

  Abort! Abort!

  “I met my bride-to-be at a bar,” Sam said proudly. “Rusty’s Bucket actually.”

  Well, shit.

  A muted sigh came from the end of the picnic table where her mother sat glaring at her. “Leah, I really wish you wouldn’t go into that horrid place. I’ve told you it’s filled with hooligans. Just recently, I heard a man started a fight in there and knocked another guy out cold.”

  “Guilty as charged,” Sam said, chuckling at her mother’s dismay. “But in my defense, the bastard deserved it after the things he said to your—um, my woman.”

  Her grandfather beamed and slapped Sam on the back, as if he were pinning him with a badge of honor. “If you were defending my granddaughter, then I say there’s no better reason to get into a pissing match with another man. Good for you, son.”

  Sam took a swig of his beer, then set it down. “Well, I wasn’t about to let that guy run us out of there. We like to go down to Rusty’s Bucket once in a while since that’s where I pick up most of my women. Didn’t Leah tell you we planned to have an open marriage?”

  So many things happened at once.

  Ethan choked on a shrimp. Her grandparents’ eyes widened in distress. Leah swayed in stunned silence as the crab fell out of her hands and thudded onto the table in front of her. Mom’s slim hand flew to her heaving chest, gasping in shock. Her mouth dropped open, and her painted lips formed a perfect O as air wheezed in and out of her, as if she couldn’t breathe.

  Jesus. She’s hyperventilating. Leah jumped up and furiously fanned her mother with a paper towel. “Mom? Mom, are you okay?”

  Slack-jawed and unable to speak, her dad stayed in his seat, scowling at a grinning Sam as if he were about to maim him or kill him…or possibly both. But after a moment passed, a huge grin spread on her dad’s face, and he burst into hysterics. “You sonofagun! For a second there, you almost had me.” Then he chuckled some more until tears of laughter welled up in his eyes.

  Sam glanced at Leah, then back to her father. “Well, Bill, I tried to keep a straight face, but you were much quicker than I gave you credit for.”

  Her mom recovered a little, but still panted heavily. “You mean, it was a…a joke?”

  “Of course it was, Nancy,” Sam replied, fake-chuckling. “I wouldn’t have taken it so far though, if I had known you were going to turn into a fainting goat with cocksucker’s cramp.”

  Oh, fuck me. Leah groaned and shook her head. This whole situation was getting way out of hand. “Okay, that’s it. This has gone far enough.”

  Sam’s head snapped to her. “Leah…”

  But she couldn’t bear it any longer. “Mom, Dad, I have something I need to tell you.”

  * * *

  Sam couldn’t let her do it.

  Leah was going to tell her family the truth about their fake engagement and would then suffer through the consequences just to put an end to it all. Uh-uh. No fucking way. He got her into this mess, and he was damn sure going to get her out of it without causing her any more embarrassment…at least the kind that came with admitting they’d faked the entire engagement thing.

  He shot out of his seat and snatched her up by the arm, dragging her away from the table before she could say another word. “We’ll be right back,” he called over his shoulder. “I need a minute alone with my fiancée.”

  Leah tried to dig her heels in, but Sam overpowered her. She stumbled behind him as he yanked her upstairs and into the house. He didn’t stop moving until they reached their bedroom, where he quickly slammed the door behind them. Only then did he allow her to shake his hand off her wrist. “No, damn it. Don’t do it.”

  She heaved out a large breath. “I have to, Sam.”

  “Why? Because you feel guilty?”

  “Of course I do. Don’t you?”

  He shrugged and a grin tugged at his mouth. “Not particularly.”

  She glared at him. “Bullshit. If that’s true, then why did you back down from the open marriage bit you fed them? You could have let them keep on believing it, rather than telling my dad you were joking, but you didn’t.”

  “That wasn’t my fault. I would have let them keep believing it, but your mother practically died on me out there. I couldn’t keep it going after that, not without a defibrillator handy. So when your father assumed I was kidding, I just went with it. Sonofabitch, Leah, I only meant to shock the woman, not kill her.”

  “Jesus. This whole thing has gotten ridiculous. We need to call it off!”

  He shook his head. “Look, I know you feel bad about tricking them, but you don’t have to tell them the truth. It’s only two weeks.”

  “Damn it, Sam. I can’t do this anymore. I thought I could, but I was wrong.” Leah paced the room in small circles. “We shouldn’t be doing this anyway. It isn’t fair.”

  “Oh, give me a break. They’ll be fine. They won’t ever know the truth.”

  Leah stopped pacing and gazed up at him. “I wasn’t talking about them. Yes, I feel bad that I’m lying to my family, but that’s not what I meant.”

  “Is it because I told them the truth about my parents?”

  “What? No. I mean, it would have been better if you had told them your mom was a drugged-out whore and your father was doing hard time for murder. But that’s not what I’m talking about.” She ran a shaky hand through her hair, then gazed up at him with glassy eyes. “This isn’t at all fair to you. They’re going to think you’re this horrible person, all because you’re…h-helping me.” Her voice cracked under the stress of the situation.

  “Hey, don’t cry,” he said softly. When she covered her face with her hands, he gathered her into his arms and pulled her into his chest. “It’s all going to be okay, I promise. This was all my fault. I shouldn’t have put you in this position to begin with.”

  She sniffled as her hands traveled up his back, wrapping around his shoulders. “I don’t want to lie to them anymore.” Her strained voice warbled. “I…I can’t deceive them like this for two weeks. I just can’t.”

  Leah shivered against him, and his stomach twisted into a knot. Damn it. He hated that she was so distraught and wanted to relieve her of the burden he’d placed on her.

  He held her tightly against him for a moment longer, then pulled back just enough until he could see her puffy face. “Leah, if you want me to go back out there and call my mother a whore, I will.”

  Though her eyes were still red and watery, the corners of her mouth lifted slightly in amusement. “I don’t think that will be necessary.”

  “Thank God,” he replied, breathing a huge sigh of relief. “Pretend or not, I don’t think I could have actually done it. My mother is a great lady. You’ll love
her. I mean, you would…if you were meeting her…which you aren’t.” Christ. Could I sound like more of a insensitive dumbass?

  As if he’d made her uncomfortable, Leah pulled out of his arms and moved away. “What are we going to do, Sam?”

  He thought for a moment. “Okay, I have an idea. How about we end the engagement this weekend?”

  Her brows drew together in confusion. “What do you mean?”

  “We were almost home free anyway. If you hadn’t said anything, your dad probably would have already been throwing me out on my ass for talking to your mother the way I did. So why don’t we up the timeline?” A smiled played on his lips. “Instead of two weeks, give me until the end of the weekend. By then, your family will be begging you to dump me.”

  Fear flashed in her eyes. “W-what are you going to do?” she asking, wringing her trembling hands together.

  “Let me worry about that. All I need you to do is to go back out there with a smile on your face.”

  She shifted nervously and chewed on her bottom lip. “Sam, I don’t think I can.”

  A knock sounded on the door, and Leah squeaked. Sam placed his finger against her lips to silence her.

  “You kids okay in there?” her father asked, his voice gruff.

  “We’re busy, Bill. Give us a minute, would ya?” Sam’s impatient tone proved effective because, seconds later, he heard the sound of her dad’s retreating footsteps. He dropped his hand from Leah’s mouth.

  “Oh, man. That was so rude,” Leah whispered, holding her palm against her stomach, as if she were suddenly feeling ill. “Do you think they know something is up?”

  “No, they don’t know anything. And yes, my comment was rude…because they aren’t supposed to like me, remember? Isn’t that the goal here?”

  “I know, but…God, I hate this.” She fidgeted with the hem of her top and sighed. “We’re going to hell. You know that, right?”

  “Well, at least we’ll have each other when we get there.” Sam smiled to let her know he was teasing and then motioned to the door. “As soon as you’re ready to face your parents again, we’ll go back out.”

  Leah took a deep breath, wiped her fingers beneath her damp lashes, and then straightened her posture. “How’s this?”

  He admired her willingness, especially since he knew she was still upset, but there was no way she could walk out there in her current state. Her face was pale, her hands shook uncontrollably, and her eyes were swollen. She definitely looked like she’d been crying…which she had. “You can’t go out there yet. They’re going to know something is wrong.”

  Leah covered her face. “Oh God. I’m ruining everything, aren’t I?”

  “Relax. It’s fine,” he told her, though nothing he said seemed to help.

  She shook her head furiously. “Jesus. They’re going to see right through me when I go back out there. They’re going to realize something is wrong, then we’re going to have to come clean anyway, aren’t we? This can’t be happening. What do we do, Sam?”

  Well, for starters, he needed her to calm down right-the-fuck now, but she only continued working herself up more. He didn’t even have time to answer her questions before she started flipping her lid again.

  “Christ, why did I say anything? They’re probably going to ask me what I wanted to tell them. Damn it. Why did I have to open my big, fat, stupid—”

  His hand shot out and whipped her around so fast that her eyes widened. She nearly lost her balance, but he yanked her against his chest to steady her. Then, hoping to snap her out of her panic-induced state, he did the only thing he could think of. He pressed his lips firmly against hers and kissed the shit out of her.

  She stiffened instantly, and her hands clutched at his shoulders. But as his mouth moved against hers, inviting her to participate, she relaxed her grip and allowed the tension in her body to melt away. Unfortunately, he couldn’t say the same for himself.

  With anyone else, a distraction like that might have been a good idea. But with Leah, he hadn’t considered the side effect she would have on him in return. And it damn sure wasn’t a small one.

  The moment her tongue touched his, desire blazed through him, and a guttural moan sounded in his throat. The woman tasted as sweet as sugar, and just like any other decadent dessert that had ever passed his lips, he couldn’t get enough of her.

  His arms banded tighter around her, pulling her closer, as he fed his craving. He licked every inch of her sexy mouth, tasting her erotic saccharine flavor. The warmth of her hot body permeated his clothes, seared his skin, and heated his blood. A pleasurable ache hit him low and deep, and his rapidly hardening length collided against the seam of his jeans like a battering ram.

  Whoa! What the hell are you doing, Sam?

  But he ignored the nagging voice inside his head. He wanted Leah. Badly. Probably more than anything he’d ever wanted in his life. And he wasn’t about to put a stop to anything involving her lips on his.

  Quit kissing her, dipshit. You’re only making things worse.

  Persistent little fucker. “Shut up,” he whispered to the irritating voice.

  Leah pulled back and stared at him. “W-what did you say?”

  “Nothing,” he said, quickly pulling her mouth back to his.

  Once again, Leah went limp in his arms, allowing the renewed tension to evaporate and surrendering to the sensations swirling between them. He could take her right here, right now—and probably would have—if they weren’t…standing in a guestroom…inside her grandparents’ home.

  Yep, that’s what I was trying to tell you, idiot.

  Fuck.

  After one final sampling of her lips, Sam relented to his subconscious and tore his mouth from hers. It took a hell of a lot more willpower than he thought it would. His heart beat wildly in his chest, but he sucked in a ragged breath to slow his pulse rate.

  Leah stumbled back and gazed up at him with confusion flickering in her glazed green eyes. “W-why did you kiss me just now? There wasn’t anyone here to see it.”

  “I needed you to calm down.”

  “Oh.” Her cheeks glowed a vibrant shade of red. She lowered her head and turned away from him. “Right. I understand.”

  Sonofabitch. He’d given her the primary motive for the kiss, which was the truth. But what he hadn’t told her was that he’d wanted to kiss her. Hell, even now, he could still taste her sweetness on his lips, which only made him want to do it again. Because no matter the original reason for the kiss, locking lips with her was definitely not a hardship.

  “Leah…”

  “We should get back before my dad comes looking for us again.” She waltzed past him, opened the door, and walked out, not bothering to wait for him.

  Chapter Twelve

  God, Leah felt like a moron.

  From day one, Sam had made it perfectly clear he wasn’t the least bit attracted to her. Not only that, but he’d even warned her not to read into anything that might happen during their weekend vacation with her family. So why the hell had she done something so stupid as to ask him about the kiss? She should have known it had meant nothing to him…even if it had felt like something to her.

  His lips on hers had catapulted her into a Zen-like state all right. But it had also sent shock waves of electrifying pleasure zinging through her central nervous system at rapid speed. Guess that just proved what a great actor he really was. If you ask me, the man went into the wrong career.

  The kiss had been nothing more than his way of calming her down—a distraction, which also doubled as a figurative slap in the face. But the way her cheeks stung with heat, he might as well have slapped her for real.

  It was embarrassing enough to know he wasn’t into her. She didn’t need or want him to explain why or make excuses. Nothing he could say would make her feel better anyway. She just wanted to get through this weekend as quickly as possible.

  Leah made it back downstairs just as Sam caught up to her. Her family sat at the table, all of
them looking a little put out at having to wait for them to return. “Everything okay, honey?” her dad asked her, eyeing Sam warily as he took his seat.

  “Sure,” she said nonchalantly, sliding in next to Sam. She gave her dad a sincere smile to placate him. “Let’s eat.”

  Everyone relaxed as they resumed their meal. Enough so that her dad started making some light conversation. “So what kind of cake are you making for your birthday, Leah?”

  “I haven’t decided yet,” she said, wiping her mouth. “I don’t know. Maybe chocolate this year.”

  “How about a lovely carrot cake?” her mother asked. “That sounds delicious, doesn’t it, dear?”

  “Sure, um, I guess so.”

  Sam set down his fork and wiped his mouth. “Hold on a minute. You make your own cake for your birthday?”

  “Well, yeah. I’ve done it every year since I was eight.”

  The corner of his lips turned downward. “But it’s your birthday,” he argued, his eyes narrowing slightly.

  She waved him off, not wanting to make a big deal out of it. “Don’t be silly, Sam. It’s still my birthday, no matter who makes the cake. I always make everyone’s cake, including my own. I am the baker in the family, you know.” Then she added, “Besides, it’s no different than when I’ve made desserts for you in the past.”

  His jaw clenched, and a muscle ticked in his cheek, but he didn’t say anything else about it. Apparently, he didn’t appreciate her comment or the way her family did things, which wasn’t all that surprising. But since he’d be out of her life after this weekend, it didn’t really matter what he agreed with.

  A half hour later, the banging of crab mallets came to an abrupt end. The only sounds lingering were the occasional background chatter and the appreciative sighs that occurred due to full bellies.

  “Damn it. You ate the last crab, didn’t you?” Sam asked, his face serious.

  Her face broke with a smile. “I told you it was mine.”

  “Yeah, but only because your dad helped you cheat. The moment you told him I loved football, he used that knowledge to distract me and slow me down.”