by Frost, H. Q.
“I don’t know. I was caught up.”
“Who was it?”
She was quick to respond, “You don’t know him.”
“Was it Perry?”
“No, Ian! He’s gay!” She winced again from pain and he huffed.
“Calm down,” he reprimanded. “I don’t think you’re up for sex, and to tell you the truth, Kare.” Getting to his feet, he stared down at her. “I’m not ready for it.”
He watched her eyes narrow heinously and her lips purse into a disgusted scowl, then in an accusatory tone, she asked, “Where were you last night?”
“My mom’s.” Not threatened by her odious glower, he walked to the doorway, then challenged, “Something you want to say?”
The muscles it took to get her face into such an execrative expression relaxed and her weary eyes dropped to the comforter.
“Have you cheated on me?”
Promptly and calmly, he responded with, “No.”
As if the woman had dissociative identity disorder, a believing smirk graced her lips and she brought happy eyes to his. “I’m sorry, but I’ll never do it again. When it happened, I was sick that I did that to you.” She went on talking, but he stopped listening.
He wondered where his guilt was for lying to her face, and the fact he no longer felt an ounce of remorse for being with Lilith behind Karen’s back was alarming. Was this proof he didn’t love her? He knew he wasn’t in love with her, but was it possible he didn’t even have love for her? If so, then why couldn’t he let her go?
Had they seen it in Her eyes
I’m nervous and my stomach is sick while I pull on a short, pink Twiggy dress; it’s cute, but I feel wrong because this man wants a young girl. I’m young, but he wants eighteen young.
I slide on black flats and stare down at my feet. It’s probably normal to feel this sick, it’s my first job and I’m a prostitute! I’m excited too because this means I’ll get paid. God, I hope I’ll get paid. What if I’m awful at this and he refuses to pay? I’m thinking too much.
Per the client’s request, I paint my nails blue and I find this very weird, but it’s only nail polish. The most discomfiting demand is his appearance request for my hair. With a perfect part down the middle of my head, I tie each half into a pigtail that I sweep over my shoulders so my loose curls fall over my breasts. Soft pink lipstick—Yuck, I look like an idiot—and just a touch of mascara to separate my lashes. In the mirror, Lilith from a few months ago is staring back at me and I don’t like this Lilith anymore. I like my heels, and red lips, and shirts that hint at cleavage and sometimes just flat out gives it away. I wish Ian were here to help talk me through the process of getting ready.
I roll my eyes and pull my trench raincoat on; at least he didn’t dictate what type of coat I can wear… because that matters. I open the door to Tony, he’s my driver and he’ll be picking up Mr. Tanaka too.
“Ready?” There’s no awkwardness in his mannerisms, it’s like we never slept together.
Maybe that’s what they do, one fuck, maybe two, and no one makes a big deal about it.
I slide into the backseat then pull cotton candy spritzer from my purse—Mr. Tanaka’s request.
“Sorry, Tony,” I mutter, spritzing myself.
The terrible, overly sweet smell fills my nostrils and I start to cough; I feel like a sixteen-year-old hooker. I actually have no idea what that feels like. When Tony starts to cough quietly, muffled by his hand, I crack the window.
“I’m fine, Lily.” He’s trying to be nice.
The drive is nerve racking, making my hands clammy. I still can’t breath because of this spray either.
We pull up to a hotel and Tony looks back at me. “You all right?”
“Mm.” I nod, staring at him and I know my face is screaming ‘help me!’.
“You’re sweating, Lily,” he points to my forehead and I quickly lift my hand to the damp drops across my flesh.
“Please go get him,” I snap and remove my coat.
The urge to vomit is threatening my stomach. Maybe if I did, I’d feel better. This is ridiculous; I’m being ridiculous and I really need to pull it together because I’m acting like a freak right now! Breathe, Lily, breathe.
The infinitesimal gusts of wind I get by waving my hand in front of my face does nothing to abate the perspiration I feel starting to gather under my arms. When I see Tony emerge, I quickly look straight ahead, trying to act cool, calm, and collected. The door opens and my client slides in, but I don’t look over until he’s settled. God, he’s attractive! He’s young; I thought he’d be old, but he’s early thirties maybe, and he smells really good.
Pushing out his hand to shake mine, he greets me with, “Hi.”
“Hi.” I try to nonchalantly swipe my sweaty palm over my coat before shaking his hand, but I know he felt it.
With a glance at his hand, he asks, “Nervous?”
“No. It’s a little warm tonight.”
Laughing at my lie, he boasts, “It’s fifty-four degrees!” All I can do is smile. “I’m Robert.”
“Lily—”
“I know that.”
I chuckle, feeling completely out of my element.
“Ian says you’re the perfect girl for tonight.” The highly-doubtfully look across his face has me straightening my posture a little.
“I am.” I assure, but I don’t believe it, why should he? “Dinner and light conversation, right?”
“No sex,” he says firmly.
Offering a smile, I promise, “Then I’m the perfect girl.”
Returning my smile with his own charming grin, it shows how very attractive this man is. I didn’t think attractive men bought escorts. . . . I’ve actually never thought about anything to do with escorts.
“You have to act like you know me, Lily. We’re friends, and when I’m in town we’re usually together. Can you do that?”
“Will I be asked anything personal?”
“Probably not. You probably won’t even be addressed except by me. Your body.” Disappointment mars his face when he looks over at me.
Offended he’s insulting my figure, I grit my teeth, not in the mood to deal with insults about my body. I just sliced open my stomach last night because I’m borderline psycho, buddy!
“You’re turned away from me. Your hands are firm in your lap. You’re acting like we’ve never met.”
Oh. . . . Like I said: borderline psycho.
“We haven’t met, Mr. Tanaka, and we’re alone right now. Why don’t you brief me a little. What should I call you?”
“Robert.”
“How old are you, Robert?”
“Thirty-four. How old are you? I requested a young girl.”
“I don’t fit that?”
“Visually.” He nods.
“I’m twenty-two, but I’ll be however old you’d like me to be.”
“Twenty-two is fine. You won’t be asked anyway.” With a shrug, he looks out the window, giving me the sense that he isn’t impressed.
Nervousness hits my stomach again because this is going to be a complete fail. I’m going to fail at flirting.
I want Ian.
I clear my throat. “And we are friends with benefits? Dating? Or strictly friends?”
“Dating when I’m in Chicago.”
“Stop me if I’m going about this all wrong, but, we are trying to impress your colleagues, right?”
“Basically.” He nods again, looking back out the window.
“Okay.” Directing my attention out the window, I take his hand to get into character.
Immediately, he stiffens, but I swipe my thumb over his knuckles and it causes him to relax. I’m still nervous, but I’m trying to pull it together because I can tell he doesn’t like me and I don’t want Ian to be mad at me or fire me after my first date.
Holding my hand, he helps me out of the car and it’s almost like we’re an established couple. He waves and smiles at a group of men seated at a table and the fi
rst thing I notice is I’m the only female. We approach the table and he’s keeping my hand in the fold of his left arm while he shakes each hand of the seated gentlemen. They’re all staring at me and I think they’re waiting for him to introduce me, but he doesn’t. Instead, he pulls out my chair and I sit, smiling politely, playing my paid for part. When he sits next to me, his hand goes to my back and I lean into his ear. I don’t want to give myself a bighead, but I think the men are pleased by Robert’s date.
“Do you think they’re impressed by looks alone?” I whisper with a smile.
Letting out a laugh, he turns to me. “I was.” His smile seems like the first real smile since we’ve met.
Subtly flirting and occasionally touching me, I know what he wants. He wants the other men to think I find him charming and irresistible, so I do my job. I’m in tune to what he says and I try to touch him every chance I get. The eyes he keeps giving me, though, he’s making it hard to just pretend.
One of the other men at the table is genuinely funny, everything he says is humorous and I try not to laugh, but I can’t help it. Displeased by this, Robert uncomfortably shifts in his chair, so I strangle my laughter and try to block out the comedian.
Robert leans into my ear and I’m waiting to be lectured. “I like your giggle, Lily,” he says and leans back so our eyes meet; his head does a slight nod, indicating he wants me to react with a giggle and maybe a lascivious expression.
I play along, biting my bottom lip with a giggle that’s more seductive than giggly. With a pleased smile, his hand goes to my shoulder and he sits back in his seat. I’ve relaxed because this is the dullest dinner I’ve ever experienced, but I keep reminding myself I’m being paid and I’m with an attractive man; even if this is fake.
Once talk starts, the men at the table are all business, but they each eye me occasionally, and tucked close to Robert’s side, I keep to myself.
Dinner’s concluded, but now we’ve moved over to couches in the back of the restaurant where soft music is playing and they’re enjoying drinks. Robert’s arm is around me, keeping me close and the looks I keep getting from the other men are hard to read. I wonder what they’re thinking. Perhaps, ‘why is this young girl at Robert’s side’, or maybe they’re worried I’m underage. Robert has told me to only drink water, so I know that’s the image he wants to portray, and as much as I’m unsettled by that, I remind myself it’s my job.
When I excuse myself to go to the bathroom, all of there heads adjust to watch me walk away. I feel ridiculous. This dress would look good in a pair of heels I have; I can picture them perfectly, but in these flats I look like an adolescent. ‘It’s just a job’, I keep repeating to myself.
In the mirror my mom is staring back at me and it makes me want to put my red lipstick on. The wound on my wrist is hidden with colorful bangles; girlish bangles. I huff and reapply my pink lipstick then check my phone. Ian hasn’t text or called, but I suppose it wouldn’t be professional of him if he did.
When I return to the couches, three of the men have left, giving me hope this will be over soon. They continue to talk business and I’m dreadfully, fall asleep bored, but I keep a smile firm on my lips because this isn’t for my pleasure. I’m getting tired of reminding myself that.
The man that looks the oldest of the group looks at me. “What’s your name again?”
“Lily,” Robert answers for me and I place my hand on his knee.
“You know this guy has a girlfriend at home, Lily?”
The three men laugh and Robert shifts a little.
“Well, he’s not at home.” I probably shouldn’t have said that, but I have to defend my date.
Robert grins a victorious grin and pulls me a little closer, kissing my temple. The men are laughing, proving they’re all pigs. All that comes to mind is Ian. Ian is one of these men; I’m his fiancée and he has a girlfriend. He’s a pig and I’m a home-wrecking whore. Oh god, this is not the time to do this.
We’re approaching the third hour of the date and finally they stand and shake hands. Robert keeps me firmly at his side with his arm around me.
“Hey, good to meet you,” the funny man says and winks at me. I just smile; my face hurts from fake smiling for the last three hours.
When we leave, it feels like a weight’s been lifted off my chest and I need a drink of some sort.
In the backseat, Robert turns to me to say, “Thank you.”
“Pleasure was all mine.” I smile at him then look out the window.
“I do have a girlfriend in Yokohama.”
I nod and smile. I don’t care.
“That’s why I said no sex.”
I nod again and smile.
“If I didn’t, we would have sex.”
“I don’t do that.” I smile nicely, but now I’m annoyed.
“I don’t mean I’d pay for it.” He grins at me.
I bite the corner of my lip; apparently he picked up on my actual desire.
“I’m in a relationship, Mr. Tanaka.”
“He’s a lucky man, Lily.” He pats my knee then looks out his window.
When we pull up to the hotel, he catches me checking my phone again.
“Would you like to come up for a nightcap?”
I have no idea if I’m supposed to do this. I glance at Tony who’s looking at me in the rearview mirror, then I look back at Robert.
“Sure.” I slide out after him.
Glancing back at Tony, he holds up his phone, indicating for me to call when I’m done. Shit, am I supposed to be doing this?
*LUXE*
Holding her hand, he stepped onto the elevator and Lilith wanted to suggest they go to the restaurant bar, but she kept her mouth shut.
“I don’t usually drink, Mr. Tanaka.”
“One drink. You have a ride home.” He smiled; she leaned against the wall exhausted and drained from the boring dinner. “Where’s your boyfriend?”
“My fiancé is probably at his house.”
“You don’t live together?” He opened the suite door.
“No.” She smiled, following him in. “Are you in town for a while?”
“A few nights. I’ll probably need you again. I wasn’t sure. I wanted to try you out first.”
“And you approve?” It was hard for her to subdue her smirk.
With a firm nod, he said, “I believe they left the restaurant envious.”
“So now that there is no one around to impress, why exactly am I up here?” She glanced around, but kept an innocent smile on her lips.
“To impress me,” he responded plainly.
“Would you like me to giggle and twirl my hair? Pop my bubblegum? Get ridiculously tipsy and fight to stand?”
“Is that how you normally act, Lily?” He began to pour them a drink.
“Not at all, Mr. Tanaka.” Her sweet side had worn thin.
“I didn’t think so.”
“So then what is it you’d like me to do, Robert?” She sat in a chair, accepting a glass of wine. “I don’t think I’m supposed to be up here right now. Exactly what’d you pay for?”
“Dinner.” His tone was matter of fact and yet, he didn’t expect her to leave.
She stood. “Then I should not be here with this drink.” Lifting the drink, she set it on the table.
Picking up her glass, he confidently said, “But you want to be,” and held the glass out to her again. “I don’t want to have sex with you.”
“And why not?” She raised an eyebrow.
“I’m committed. I just want your time.”
“I don’t have time to give, Mr. Tanaka.”
“Is that true?” He gave her a doubtful eye and her cellphone rang.
“Excuse me. If this is no longer paid for, I’m free to answer my calls.” Lilith looked at the illuminated picture of her and Ian on the beach in Barbados and smiled. “Hello?”
Chagrined, Ian blurted, “Where are you? Are you in his hotel room?”
“I wasn’t sure if this
was paid for,” she quietly explained.
“It’s not. Leave.”
Pissed off, she snickered, “I don’t want to.”
“What?” he snapped.
“If you’d like, I’ll inform you when I leave, otherwise, I’ll speak to you tomorrow. Good night.”
“Lily!” he scoffed.
“You will not tell me who I will or will not spend time with,” she growled quietly.
A few noises grunted from his throat with disapproval, but he was at a loss for words.
“Good night, Ian.”
“Lily,” he breathed as she hung up.
Entering the room and picking up the wine glass, she said, “I have time for a glass.”
Robert smiled and sat at the table while on his laptop; she sat on the couch, sipping her wine. They talked about Japan until she got her glass of wine down.
“Now I really do have to leave.”
“Thank you for the evening, Lily. I will contact Ian for another date.”
Standing at the door, she smiled. “Sounds good, Robert. Thank you for the wine. Good night.”
After he swiftly kissed her cheek, he said, “Night,” pulling open the door.
On her way down, she pulled her hair out of the pigtails and wiped the pink lipstick off her lips.
“I’m all set, Tony,” she said into the phone, exiting the elevator.
“Uh, Ian’s there,” Tony responded nervously.
“Oh, he is?” Her piqued tone was confused for concern.
“He made me, Lily. I don’t know why.”
“Thanks, Tony. Have a good night.”
“Uh, yeah, you too.” He’d seen it before, Ian show up on the spot to fire a girl, and thinking this was Lilith’s fate, he felt sorry for her.
Ian stood leaned against a light pole just outside the doors; spotting him, she came to a halt and folded her arms across her chest, glaring at him.
“How long would you stand there exactly?”
“All night if I had to.” He put his hand out to take hers, but she refused.
“Not very discreet, boss,” she muttered, following him to the Roadster.
“Did he get more than he paid for?” Ian uncouthly asked as they approached his car. With a gasp, she faced him, but before she could speak, he said, “Who’d you fuck yesterday?”