The Billionaire's Saving Grace: A contemporary romance

by Fiona Miers

  She arrived with plenty of time to spare so went to the bathroom to freshen herself up and get a strong handle on her emotions.

  Nate was going to toss her out on her ass, and she had to be ready for that. He was terrified of getting too close to anyone, that was damn obvious, but the why wasn’t so much. If she could get him to open up, let her in some more, she could love him how he deserved to be loved.

  Whoa, when did that happen?

  She closed her eyes for a moment and let the truth sink in. She’d fallen head over heels for the complex, brilliant man that Nate was.

  The only important thing now was to apologize, and grovel if necessary, for him to forgive her.

  A groan escaped her lips and she mumbled to herself, “Yeah, but you’ve gotta make him talk to you first.”

  She moved with a brisk stride and purpose, out the door, along the corridor and through the maze of floors until she stood outside Nate’s door.

  Her belly trembled, her hands were sweating and the need to run was there in the shaking of her legs.

  She lifted her hand and knocked on the door before she could change her mind.

  “Come in.”

  Her tummy dropped at the sound of his strong, autocratic tones but she pushed open the door. She’d conquered bigger feats than this. She could apologize to the man who meant way more to her than she’d like to admit.

  “Good morning, Nate.”

  He froze in his chair, his eyes like ice as they looked her up and down.

  She lifted her chin and gave him her sunniest smile as she strode straight in and sat in the chair facing him.

  His eyes were hard and angry as he stared at her. Dr. Jekyll was back.

  “Emily. Are you here to sign your termination papers?”

  May as well agree to that.

  “Yes. I’m also here to talk to you about Sunday morning and to talk about us.”

  “Us?” His tone would have caused icicles to grow in Hell. She actually shivered as cold tingles quivered over her spine.

  “Yes. Us. We had an amazing night together Saturday night and then Sunday morning was terrible. I hope that’s not going to ruin everything between us.”

  He stood up and she got to her feet also. There was no way she could stay sitting while he glowered down at her.

  “First of all, Emily, there is no us. We slept together a few times and now it’s over.”

  Cra-ack goes my heart.

  She waited, not breathing. Was that all he was going to say? He couldn’t possibly be that upset still? She’d been really hoping he would forgive her for Sunday.

  “That’s a bit harsh, Nate. I know I shouldn’t have pushed you into that room on Sunday morning, it was a mistake. I won’t do that again. But please, let me make it up to you.”

  He walked around the desk and strode over to the opaque window and stood next to the door. She half expected him to open it and demand she leave, but he was obviously getting into position.

  She twisted to face him, her heart thumping in her chest. She tried hard not to show him that she was in pain, but her face always belied her feelings and she knew he’d be able to see more than she wanted him to.

  “Emily, I am not some project that you need to work on. I am not a charity case. Please get out of my office and take your meddling ways with you.”

  He still didn’t open the door and her mouth dropped open.

  “Pardon me? I never thought you were a charity case. Far from it. You’re one of the most successful, humble, beautiful people I’ve ever met. You’re perfect the way you are.”

  A muscle ticked in his jaw and he glanced away.

  “Get out.”

  No, please don’t, Nate.

  She stepped closer, tears gathering in her eyes as her nose began to sting. She swallowed down the lump that had risen in her throat and tried to blink back the warmth in her eyes.

  “Nate, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way. I should never have pushed you to face your fears like that, it wasn’t fair. I just thought… I didn’t intend to…” She was losing the battle, she could feel it in the crispness of the air, in the straightness of his spine.

  “No, you didn’t intend to do anything. You didn’t try to empathize with me, despite everything I explained, Emily. I let you in closer than I’ve ever let anyone, and yet it still wasn’t enough. You treated me like one of your Eleanor’s House women, and I am not yours to fix!” He puffed a little and glared at her hard.

  Her throat hurt, her heart ached, and she couldn’t speak.

  He took a deep breath and seemed to gather his composure before speaking again. “I’m giving you a week’s notice to finish up at Eleanor’s House too, and I suggest you don’t push me any further or I will speak to your supervisor at your day job as well.”

  His nostrils were flaring and goosebumps rose on her skin. Dr. Jekyll really was out today, and he had a knife aimed right at her heart. She stepped away a little, finding her voice once again.

  “But Eleanor’s House is my life. It’s the best thing I do with my time. I love it.”

  And I love you. I’m so sorry I did this to us, Nate.

  “Find another charity.”

  He opened the door and lifted his chin even higher.

  She had nothing left to say. All the words had been said.

  She reached for a smile but found nothing left inside herself. She could volunteer at another charity, of course. She’d have to. She needed to offset the guilt she felt for the money she made in her corporate job, and helping really good-hearted people made her feel good about herself. [DC4][SF5]

  People who needed her.

  Which, it was quite obvious, Nate didn’t.

  “Thank you, Mr. Johnson. And good luck with everything.”

  Her voice sounded a lot stronger than she felt and she was proud of herself for not collapsing completely as he nodded once in dismissal. She pushed her legs to walk her body to the lift and to push the button.

  The yellow light lit up and her world swayed on its axis.

  One day was all it had taken to turn her life upside down, one morning, one single minute in time. And as she stood by the lift waiting for her carriage to arrive the first of many, many tears slipped down her cheeks.

  She’d just ruined the best thing in her life, and for the first time, she had no idea how to fix it.

  Chapter Thirteen.

  Eating alone used to fill him with a sense of power. Happiness. Relaxation.

  Very strange that it now made him feel like a loser, even in an expensive restaurant.

  How could one woman make such a difference in his life?

  Nathan finished his dinner and wandered along King Street, the lights and music of a strip joint calling to him like the virtual siren call it was trying to be.

  Why not?

  He stepped into the well-lit, clean establishment and made his way to the bar. He ordered a drink from the young girl behind the bar and turned to enjoy the show. There were girls giving lap dances in corners, groups of men surrounding the stage, and several solo older men that made him frown.

  He’d never enjoyed strip joints, even in University when his friends had dragged him out for a night on the town. After a lifetime of watching his mother get degraded, the last thing he wanted to do was watch other women sell their bodies for money.

  Then why had he come in?

  He paid for his whiskey and took a seat on the barstool. Something had drawn him inside. Pity and depression, perhaps?

  For fuck’s sake, pull yourself together. It’s only been a week.

  The whiskey was strong and burned his throat as he swallowed it down.

  One drink and he’d leave.

  A hand slid across his thigh and he turned to give the girl the brush off but froze as boiling hot lava slid down his spine.

  “Sharnie?”

  The weathered face before him registered who he was with a gaping mouth and a loud gasp.

  “Nathan?
Natey…? Is it really you?”

  He grimaced at the old nickname that she’d used on him back in Uni. He’d hated it then and now it was ridiculous.

  “Sharnie, how are you? Long time no see.”

  She slid up closer to him, her undernourished body wrapped in ill-fitting underwear, not a sight he wanted to see. She’d always been thin, but now her skin was sagging, her body wearing out faster than it should have been at thirty-six.

  “Oh fabulous, darling, just fab. I always wondered what happened to you after we broke up.”

  Nathan straightened up on his barstool. Nothing good had happened after they broke up. He’d spent years torturing himself over who he’d become with Sharnie and at one stage he’d tried to find her, but she’d disappeared off most people’s radars. Now he knew why.

  “Have you got time to talk?”

  Sharnie looked around. There were more than enough girls for the men in the room. She turned back to him with a smile that didn’t reach her eyes.

  “Sure, I’m due a cigarette break. Wanna come stand outside with me for a ciggy?”

  He tried not to show his revulsion as he nodded and they made their way outside. He hated cigarette smoke more than most things. His father had smoked.

  “So, what has my old lover done with his life?”

  She lit her cigarette, licked her lips and looked up at him with shrewd, blue eyes. He stared at her for a moment, comparing her to the memory he held so tightly to his chest. She was very different now. The sweet, beautiful girl he’d known was gone.

  “I’m an architect.” And a billionaire, but you probably shouldn’t know that.

  Which she should remember since he’d been doing his course when they were dating. “I own my own business.”

  “Woo-hoo, you have done well for yourself, haven’t you?” She ran a hand down his arm in a lecherous way.

  “Yeah, I’ve done all right for an orphan.”

  Which was technically untrue—his dad was alive, somewhere. But as far as he was concerned, he had no family.

  “What happened to us, Natey? I was so convinced we were going to stay together forever. You broke my heart when you ended it all.”

  Her tone was smooth as she sidled up next to him, those once warm blue eyes, cold as frosted glass.

  He tried to step away but she pressed even closer. Had the years of stripping and living on the edge done this to her? Or had she always been so cold? He couldn’t remember now. The memories were starting to blur.

  “We broke up because I almost hit you, remember? During that fight? I was terrified I’d do it again. That you were too sweet to deal with me.”

  Or that his love and passion for her had turned him into his father.

  She cackled out a laugh, then coughed harshly.

  When she’d drawn breath, she took another drag on the cigarette, dropped it to the ground and pressed it into the bitumen with her red shoe.

  “Sweet? Me? I was always the one to start the fights. Don’t you remember? I loved it when you got all angry and jealous. It showed me how much you cared about me.”

  She pouted and got closer, fluttering her fake eyelashes at him.

  What the…

  “Pardon? Weren’t you devastated when we had that fight?”

  She laughed again. “Hardly. I thought you’d stay with me for sure after that, but you never came back.”

  He staggered away and pressed his spine against the bluestone building wall as his knees began to give out. No, that couldn’t be true. Why would a woman want that sort of connection with him? Could he have chosen any worse?

  “What’s the problem, sugar? Are you still into that? Cause I can handle a beating now, I can tell you. My last few guys always hit me when I bitched at them too much. Turns into really hot sex, too.”

  She advanced on him like a panther, pushing aside her black coat to reveal the swing of her hips. “I remember how you like it. I’m sure I can still turn you on.”

  He put a hand up to ward her off. His head spinning like a top, round and around. “What are you talking about? I always thought you were some sweet innocent that I’d hurt. I didn’t forgive myself.”

  She ran a hand down to his crotch, squeezing gently. “I can be anything you want, Natey. Your sweet, little, innocent girl again. No problem.”

  He looked straight at her, needing the truth so much. If he’d been wrong all these years, then he needed to know.

  “But the alcohol, me almost hitting you. I thought I was like my father. That I couldn’t cope with being in love.”

  She shrugged her shoulders. “Listen, Natey. I have to go make some money. Are you gonna come pay for a lap dance, or what?”

  She turned her nose up at him, as he straightened to his full height and pulled out his wallet. He checked the contents and pulled out two green bills.

  “I’ll give you two hundred dollars if you can give me an honest answer.”

  She practically salivated over the notes he had in his hands, her beady gaze going from his fingers to his eyes and back again.

  “I’ll tell you anything you want, Natey.”

  “Stop calling me that. It’s Nathan!”

  She nodded, not taking her eyes off the money.

  He growled and thrust the cash into her hands. “Now answer truthfully. You’ve already got the money, so I’m not paying for a specific answer, I just need to know. Was it me? Was I the evil one who almost hit a sweet, innocent young girl that night? Do I poison everyone I love?”

  She cocked her head at him and sniffed. “I don’t know what you’re on, man. You were hot and going to be rich. I kicked myself for years for not landing you properly like I should have.” She shrugged. “The night you mean, I pushed you as hard as I could. I wanted a hard fucking, or break up-makeup sex. Something. Anything. I just wanted to see some real passion in you, and instead, you bloody left. If you thought I was some sweet little blonde, it was your own fault.”

  She slipped her money into a small purse she held and winked at him. “You sure you don’t want anything else?”

  From you? Never. He shook his head and waved her off.

  When she finally left, he pushed himself off the wall and began walking. His head was spinning like he’d consumed a whole bottle of whiskey, but he had to keep moving or he’d collapse.

  All those years…

  All those years he’d thought he was a true bastard on the inside. That he could become his father with a drink in his hand. It was all wrong.

  So many lost moments, so many chances he hadn’t taken.

  Emily.

  He tripped and caught himself on a light pole, his heart pounding his sternum like a hammer on an anvil.

  He was going to be sick again.

  His stomach burned as he retched into a nearby bin.

  Gross. It was becoming a bad habit.

  He wiped his mouth and kept running. He needed to get home. Everything he thought about himself had been wrong.

  Emily had been right. He wasn’t a bad person.

  I love her.

  Nathan started running, his legs aching as he pumped the strong muscles as hard as he could.

  Thank you, God.

  Whatever had pushed him into that strip joint tonight had saved his life, and his future.

  He panted hard as he turned a corner and kept running. He needed to escape his demons and his past. Hoping to leave it all behind on the dirty streets of King Street where it belonged.

  ****

  Nathan had to make it up to Emily, but how? Just turn up at her home and apologize? No. It had to be bigger than that. The official grand gesture.

  Not that he’d done anything in a past relationship that resembled anything close to a grand gesture, but he understood the merit behind it.

  He made a few calls and found out it was Emily’s last shift at Eleanor’s House on Sunday. Despite his one week's notice, she seemed to have stretched the time to ten days.

  Good.

  He’d
spent his adult life mourning his mother’s death and damning himself for being like his father. He’d been wrong and stupid.

  He was done wallowing in self-pity.

  It ended. Now.

  He spent all week getting on top of his work and setting up a few days off for the following week. Assuming Emily forgave him, he was taking her away for a few days to get acquainted once again with that beautiful body of hers.

  A ripple of lust shimmied through his belly at that idea. It had been too long since he’d felt the clasp of her hot body around him, those beautiful eyes staring up at him.

  He waited until six o’clock at night, having been in contact with Cindy for much of the day. He’d never really considered the good women in this world, having ignored them for most of his adult life. But Cindy was a good woman, as was Emily, and he was supremely grateful to have them in his life.

  As he stepped back over the threshold of his charity house, a sense of peace settled over him. He hadn’t been able to save his mother from his father’s abuse, he’d been just a kid at the time.

  It was time to forgive himself and take a proper look at what he’d done with his life. His money and hard work had helped a lot of other women’s lives, and he was damn proud of it.

  He moved through the house, smiling at the women who gaped at him from the sidelines. He’d deliberately worn a polo shirt and some jeans, hoping that by dressing down he’d appear less intimidating.

  It wasn’t really working, but he wasn’t giving up. They may need to put some photos up around the place so the women got used to his appearance and didn’t mind him popping in.

  Stepping up to the door, he remembered the panic attack he’d had two weeks ago, and he smiled at the difference in him today. He had to admit, just standing on the stoop made his heart pound a little faster than normal, but he pushed through the uncomfortable feeling and opened the door. He moved through the charity and opened another door, interrupting a meeting he knew Emily would be at. In fact, it was a small party they’d organized to say goodbye to her. There was a table with cakes and drinks being served. Very similar to the anniversary night.

  “Nathan! So glad you made it.” Cindy rushed across the room in a flurry of perfume and he let her take his arm and pull him to the front of the room.