Caught in Darkness

by Rose Wulf

  “I—wait, any?” Veronica repeated, her eyes widening as she lifted her gaze to him. “What about Ali?” She had assumed she would at least be able to tell the truth to her best friend, though she hadn’t yet figured out how she would say it.

  Seth shook his head. “Do you really want to make Allison look your mother in the eye at your funeral and tell her she honestly believes that you’re not still walking and talking?”

  Veronica stared at him. It was hard to actually wrap her mind around her own funeral, but beyond that his words made sense. She hadn’t thought of it that way. She had thought she could at least bring one person peace—let one person know that she wasn’t really gone, and that she would be happy. It hadn’t occurred to her that that one person would then have to pretend to believe she was dead (in the traditional sense), and thereby lie to everyone else. It’s too much to ask. “No,” she replied aloud, her eyes falling back to her glass. “I can’t make her do that.”

  He gave her hand another squeeze, assuring her that he understood, but said nothing.

  For a long minute they sat like that, Veronica focusing on breathing and coming to terms with the fact that she’d seen the last of her old life. It would be a long, hard adjustment in some ways—but at least she’d already anticipated that much. Everything’s different, starting yesterday. She took a deep breath and lifted her glass to her lips again, letting the drink solidify her silent words.

  When she’d drained the glass she set it back in her lap and gave Seth’s hand a squeeze of her own, asking, “Do you really have to babysit me? Am I dangerous?”

  Seth turned a confused face toward her, arching one brow silently.

  Veronica managed a small, teasing smile and said, “I know you’re supposed to be out there helping Jasen. You’re not just staying here because you feel guilty.”

  He released a soft sigh—one she suspected she wouldn’t have heard at all if she’d still been human—and replied, “Your first few days are critical. It’s important that you get good, consistent rest, and it’s important that we have a good supply of blood on hand. I don’t expect problems, but I also don’t want to take that risk.”

  She heard what he wasn’t saying. She remembered how starved she’d felt when she’d first woken up the previous night, and she imagined that if someone who’d been freshly Turned had woken up completely alone that that could go much worse. Especially if the new vampire didn’t know what had happened to them.

  “Thank you,” she said quietly, her hand tightening around his. “I’m sorry to be dragging you from your job so much.”

  Seth shifted, reaching around her and tugging the glass from her loose grip. He set it down on the coffee table and then dragged her into his side, wrapping his arms fully around her and holding her tight. “You don’t need to apologize,” he assured her quietly. “I’m the one who should be apologizing for letting this happen to you in the first place.”

  “Don’t go getting all guilty on me,” Veronica scolded half-heartedly, her head resting on his strong shoulder. God he smells good. Had she noticed that before? She must have, but her new enhanced sense of smell made him smell infinitely better. It took effort just to drag herself back to the conversation they were having. “The situation might not have been the way I’d wanted, but I had already decided to ask you to Turn me.”

  Seth’s arms tightened around her and he shifted until his lips were beside her temple before he asked, “Why?”

  “I already answered that, remember?” she teased quietly, her eyes drifting shut. “Because I love you. Because I can’t imagine going a single day without you.” And if the worst happens, now I have a few million more days to worry about. She wasn’t sure where the thought had come from, but it startled her enough to make her tense in his arms, her fingers curling into his shirt. “So, do me a favor and don’t die anytime soon, okay?”

  “Veronica,” Seth murmured, his breath ghosting over her ear as he eased back gently. He tipped her chin up with his forefinger, holding her gaze for a moment before bowing his head and capturing her lips in a slow, tender kiss. Then he pulled back and added, “When this is over, remind me to ask you about Bonding.”

  “Bonding?” Veronica repeated as she blinked up at him. It was hard enough to restart her brain in order to think about normal things (though what passed for ‘normal’ anymore was up for debate), but did he have to go and throw a new term at her?

  “I’ll explain it later,” Seth said, pressing his lips to her forehead. “When you’re ready.”

  Her heart tripped in her chest. The very word sounded promising. “Who says I’m not ready now?”

  Seth chuckled, the sound vibrating through his chest and straight into hers. “Your body needs to stabilize first, sweetheart. Give it a few more days.”

  She swallowed, a smile tipping her lips. That was the first time he’d ever called her anything other than Veronica. Okay, so maybe he still hasn’t said the words back to me. That’s a hell of a start. “Oh,” she teased softly, “you meant that kind of ready.”

  Pounding on the door roused Veronica from a light, restless sleep on Friday afternoon and she groaned as she squeezed her eyes open. She officially understood why Seth had covered all of the condo’s windows with thick, dark drapes. Even through the heavy fabric she felt like the outside sunlight was burning her. She wasn’t looking forward to her first trip outside in the daylight—which Seth had told her they should work on in the next day or two. He’d even said something about going for a walk (just a couple of blocks, at least) through downtown by the end of the weekend, to test her strength of will against the onslaught of temptation. Of course, he hadn’t quite worded it like that.

  “Where is she?”

  The question—more like a command and an accusation all rolled into one—drew Veronica’s attention back to the present as she swung her legs over the side of the bed. She would know that voice anywhere; it was Allison. Guilt tightened like a vice in her chest, clamping over her heart. She sucked in a sharp breath but before she could really dwell on the guilt something else was churning inside of her. Even from the opposite end of the condo she could smell Allison’s perfume—and, more importantly, the blood beneath her skin. This was the first time she’d been anywhere near someone who wasn’t a vampire since she’d been Turned.

  “What are you talking about?” Seth’s voice was cautiously curious and she only barely heard it.

  “Don’t play that game with me,” Allison snapped irritably. There was a heavy thud, indicating that Allison had likely shoved her way inside and shut the door as she’d been speaking. “You have to know. Everything around here was completely normal until you showed up, and now if we’re to believe the police Veronica’s dead? That’s crap! Where is she? What have you done to her?”

  Veronica’s fists clenched around the sheet beneath her as she fought the urge to go and talk to her friend. Oh, Ali, I’m so sorry. The guilt was doing an amazing job of keeping her from focusing on the smell of the freely-flowing blood just down the hall, but Allison’s ever-rising blood pressure (and subsequently increasing heartbeat) was doing its best to earn her attention. She had never fathomed being able to hear so well, but in the moment it was only a curse.

  Seth released a low sigh and replied, “I’m sorry, Allison, but I haven’t done anything to her. And you really shouldn’t be here right now.”

  The unmistakable sound of a slap echoed throughout the apartment and Veronica cringed. She’d have to apologize to Seth for her friend’s behavior later.

  “You bastard!” Allison cried, tears in her voice. “She trusted you! She relied on you, and you can’t even be bothered to be upset over this? Or do you expect me to believe that you’re innocent and just didn’t know until right this second?”

  “I am upset,” Seth assured her calmly. “But I don’t show it the way you do. I’m sure she would be touched to know you tracked me down for her, but you need to leave.”

  “Why?” Allison chal
lenged, suspicion vying for dominance in her voice now. “What are you hiding?” There was a poignant pause before Allison exclaimed, “Oh, god…she’s here, isn’t she? You’ve got her, and you won’t even let me see her? What kind of a monster are you?”

  Veronica really, really wanted to go out there and smooth things over between them. Not that she expected Allison to be all that calm and cool with the truth. But she knew she shouldn’t—she knew she couldn’t. Seth had been right before; she really couldn’t put that kind of weight on Allison’s shoulders. But it was so hard.

  “Allison,” Seth said, an almost undetectable twinge of alarm in his voice, “you really can’t be here. I’m not hiding anything, but I’m expecting-”

  “Just shut up,” Allison snapped, her voice shaking with a mixture of fury and heartbreak. “Shut up and move out of my way or I swear to god I’ll call the police and blow all your secrets right out of the water.”

  Veronica released the mattress and wrapped her arms around herself, lips tightly secured between her teeth and eyes squinted against the sudden burning of tears. She felt like a terrible person for sitting there and letting her surrogate sister continue to believe she was lost. She just didn’t know what else she could possibly do.

  The front door opened a beat later and for an instant hope sparked in her chest. But before she could remind herself that she knew better that hope was squashed.

  “I didn’t know we were expecting company,” Jasen declared smoothly. And despite the fact that Veronica suspected there was a threat behind every word he spoke she couldn’t help but feel like the threat was more apparent this time. Her stomach rolled and her heart clenched. This was not going to end well.

  “Who’re you?” Allison demanded fearlessly. Her heartbeat betrayed her undoubtedly confident posture, but she had no way of knowing that.

  “He’s a friend of mine,” Seth interrupted. “Please understand that this isn’t a good time or place for you to be, Allison. I’m sorry.”

  “Friend?” Allison repeated carefully. “Is he in on the conspiracy, then? Because I don’t care how many bloodsucking nightmares stand in my way, I won’t stop until I get the real answer.”

  Oh, no.

  “You want a real answer?” Jasen asked pointedly. “The ‘real answer’ is that you should have left the first time Hunter told you to. I don’t have his patience, woman. Leave.”

  Allison’s heartbeat increased again and Veronica could practically see the look on her face. “Make me.”

  No! Before she knew what she was doing she’d leapt to her feet and run from the room. Only, she was still getting used to being more than human, and instead of running she’d ended up dashing. She was standing at the other end of the hallway before she’d even realized that she was on her feet, but she was just in time to see Jasen reaching for Allison’s crossed arms with a dangerous scowl on his face. Only then did she realize that she’d done more than run out of the bedroom.

  Jasen’s hand was poised in the air, one eyebrow raised pointedly, and his dark gaze was focused on Veronica.

  Allison had turned, arms falling to her sides, her eyes wide and her mouth hanging open in shock. Tears were still swimming in front of her eyes.

  It wasn’t until Seth released another almost silent sigh that Veronica’s brain kicked back into gear. She had just done the absolute worst thing she could have—exactly what she’d told herself only a minute ago that she wouldn’t do. Now she was going to have to tell Allison the truth and ask her not to tell another soul for as long as she lived. She couldn’t even take solace in the fact that she may have just saved Allison’s life, because she knew—realistically—that Seth wouldn’t have let Jasen hurt her.

  Veronica swallowed, straightening, and self-consciously wrapped her arms around herself again. Up close, now that the adrenaline was fading, the scent of Allison’s blood was overwhelming and the pounding of her heart was nearly deafening. Her throat was already dry with anticipation. It was disgusting. She was disgusting. This was her best friend, not a buffet! What have I done?

  “V?” Allison breathed, astonishment heavy in her voice. Despite her earlier words it was clear that she hadn’t really expected to find Veronica there.

  “Um, hey, Ali,” Veronica offered lamely, managing a tight-lipped smile that was really half grimace.

  Jasen’s arm fell back to his side and he declared, “I can see this is going to get weird. I’ll be back in half an hour.” He cut a pointed glance to Seth and added, “Don’t let her do anything stupid.”

  He was out the door by the time Veronica found the energy to aim a glare in his direction.

  “What,” Allison began carefully, the awe fading rapidly from her voice, “what the hell is going on? Veronica?”

  “I,” Veronica started before cutting herself off. What am I supposed to say? She couldn’t think of a lie that would be convincing enough to get Allison to go along with it, and at the end of the day whatever she told her friend would still be putting her in that position. Her gaze slid to Seth, desperately searching for help.

  “Maybe we should all sit down,” Seth offered, gesturing toward the couch. Veronica didn’t fail to notice that he remained standing very solidly between them, though off to the side. And she couldn’t bring herself to be upset about it because she understood.

  Allison’s gaze flicked between them a few times before she slowly nodded and shifted toward the couch.

  When her back was turned Veronica’s eyes snapped to Seth’s again. She still wasn’t sure what to do or say or even if she should come any further into the room.

  Seth moved toward her, dropping a hand on her shoulder, and whispered, “It’s all right. Just don’t sit too close, and don’t push yourself. I’ll be right here.”

  She nodded, offered him a grateful smile, and together they stepped properly into the living room.

  “Let me guess,” Allison said carefully as she watched Seth and Veronica settle on the far side of the couch from the chair she’d claimed, “you’re a vampire now.”

  Seth betrayed no reaction, sitting back and allowing them to speak directly to each other without looking over his head. Veronica was jealous of his reaction control, because she knew the shock was apparent on her face. She did her best to return her expression to normal and nodded slowly.

  Allison spared her from having to offer a verbal response when she said, “And since you hadn’t told anyone, I have to assume I’m not supposed to know and therefore really not supposed to tell anyone else.”

  Veronica nodded again, this time offering, “I’m sorry, Ali.”

  Allison looked away for a second, swallowing heavily, before finally asking, “Was it on purpose? Did you…turn or whatever…on purpose?”

  Veronica hesitated for a beat. She had wanted to spare her friend the gruesome details, but if she only said ‘yes’ then Allison would thoroughly misunderstand. “Yes and no,” she finally said. “I had decided to…but I had also intended to see you and Mom—at least—one more time first. But that option was…taken from me.”

  “Taken?” Allison repeated, eyes narrowed. “How?”

  “I got hurt,” Veronica heard herself saying. “And if I hadn’t Turned, then…I really would be dead now.”

  Allison swallowed again, a slim line of tears running down her cheek. It took her nearly a minute before she managed to ask, “And your mom doesn’t know?”

  “No,” Veronica replied, shaking her head firmly. “She doesn’t even know vampires are real. She can’t. I’m so sorry, Ali, but…you really can’t tell anyone.”

  “Okay,” Allison said, taking a heavy breath. She nodded slowly and Veronica recognized the gesture as Allison’s way of reassuring herself of something. Their eyes met for several seconds before Allison forced herself to her feet and said, “Then I guess I’ll go. But, V…if this is goodbye, then promise me one thing?”

  “Absolutely,” Veronica replied, attempting a reassuring smile. She kept her seat on the co
uch, just to be safe, so she was forced to look up to meet her friend’s gaze.

  A teary smile lifting Allison’s lips, Allison said, “Be beautifully happy.”

  All Veronica could offer in response was a nod and her own teary smile as tears spilled from behind her eyes.

  Chapter Eighteen

  “Distract me,” Veronica mumbled with her head on Seth’s shoulder. She was leaning into him, hands curled into his shirt and nose brushing his collar. They’d fallen into silence after Allison had let herself out and Veronica was trying to cling on to her best friend’s request. At the very least she didn’t want to have what seemed like it might be the ultimate breakdown. She swallowed heavily and said, “Tell me about Bonding. It won’t hurt for you to explain it to me, will it?”

  Seth’s arm tightened around her, this thumb rubbing slow, soothing circles into her side. “No,” he assured her. “It won’t.” He was quiet for a second before adding, “In short, a Bond is an unbreakable link between two vampires. Once a Bond is formed their souls will have merged completely, meaning that if one of the vampires should die then the other will also die.”

  “Wow,” Veronica whispered, her grip loosening as she tried to imagine that level of connection. “How does that work?”

  “Bonds take four days to fully form,” Seth replied. “For three days and three nights the two vampires can only drink from each other, and they can only drink once per twenty-four hour period. Vampire blood doesn’t have everything we need to maintain our strength, so by denying our bodies another source of nutrition we’ll become weaker. Our strength will wane and we’ll be vulnerable. By the dawn of the fourth day, if both vampires have survived and restrained themselves from drinking from another source, the Bond will be formed. They’re free to feed however they choose.”

  “And it’s irreversible?” Veronica asked quietly. She could already see why Seth had said she wasn’t ready. She couldn’t imagine only feeding once a day—and she knew she hadn’t been drinking vampire blood, though she’d never asked.