Learn to Fly

by Heidi Hutchinson

  ***

  Lenny went through her closet and packed what she would need for Aspen and then packed a separate suitcase for Europe. She was glad she would be able to bring some fresh clothes for the second leg of the tour. No hasty packing this time around.

  Duke had been out on the mountain daily since she'd come home. Every night before he went to bed he asked Lenny if she wanted to come with him in the morning. She always said no. She wasn't ready for that. She might not ever be.

  She busied herself preparing for her guests. The upstairs had several single bedrooms and one large room with six bunks in it. She made sure all the sheets were clean and all the bathrooms were fully stocked. It was weirdly similar to her job on the road.

  Every night, she and Duke would sit by the fire and visit. She didn't get personal and neither did he. But it was soothing and Lenny enjoyed the knowledge that no matter how far away she went or how long she was gone, she would be able to come home to Duke's solid presence. His loyalty never wavered.

  Chapter 11

  Tensioning

  Duke stared into the fire, just a simple conversation, he thought. It shouldn't be that hard. You guys used to talk all the time. He didn't look up as Lenny entered the room and handed him a mug of homemade hot chocolate. One more thing he was going to have to miss in a week.

  She'd only been home for a few days and she had easily settled into their old routines; cooking all his favorite winter comfort foods, cleaning up his wet clothes after a day's run, going into town for gas for the sled. She wouldn't go out on any runs with him, but he never stopped asking. He knew there was still so much more to say, to talk about. Too many things were getting ignored and he wasn't even sure where to start.

  “When does their plane get in tomorrow?” Duke asked instead. That was another thing that he was trying hard to come to terms with. The guy who had set her world right again was going to be in his, er, her home the very next night. He had no idea how far this little relationship had gone but he wasn't going to be cool with them sharing the same room.

  “Around noon I think.” A lazy smile played on Lenny's lips. “Nathan is gonna pick them up when he goes to get his brothers.”

  “It's still weird that Nathan was part of a fraternity.” Duke shook his head.

  “No, what's weird is that they still show up at my house every New Year's Eve.”

  “But it's really Nathan's party. We both know you wouldn't throw a party...ever.” Duke smiled as he sipped his hot chocolate.

  “Very true.” Lenny agreed.

  Duke let the silence become comfortable again. They had talked a lot the past few days. Lenny had shared nearly every detail of being with the band. Duke was positive he'd be able to identify them by name on sight. She had obviously made lasting friendships with these guys. He understood why she was going to at least finish the tour. But he hoped she wasn't using that as an excuse to walk away from snowboarding permanently. That was what he needed to ask her...now, where were the right words?

  “Is this our last night alone for a while?” He kept his gaze focused on the flames but he felt her shift a little on the couch.

  “Just for a little while...I'm coming home after Europe.”

  Duke didn't reveal his surprise at her answer. He took another slow slip of hot chocolate before asking his next question.

  “What about Luke?” He didn't want to know, but he had to just the same.

  “I don't know, Duke.” She let out a deep breath. “I like him and stuff but he's a rock star. And, I guess, I just don't see a future there.” She stretched her legs toward him and reclined against the armrest. “I miss being here, with you. This is nice, right?”

  Nice? This is my personal heaven. “Yeah, it's nice.” Duke knew she was staring at him so he finally turned to meet her eyes. She gave him a small smile and he deepened his frown. “You ever gonna go back out there?” Her smile faded and she looked away.

  “I don't know.” Her voice just above a whisper, “I'm scared.”

  Duke narrowed his eyes, “Of what, Lenny?” He matched her tone, not wanting to make her jumpy. Her eyes lost focus as she stared into the fire and Duke knew the answer lay there, in her perfect memory. But she wasn't telling him tonight.

  ***

  Lenny watched as Nathan hung the giant silver and gold wreath in the main foyer. He really loved decorating way too much for a mixed martial arts professional.

  “Does that look centered to you?” He asked, leaning back on the ladder trying to get a better vantage point.

  “Yes, it's perfect, stop obsessing.” Lenny chuckled and crossed her arms over her chest. “The whole place looks perfect, you've outdone yourself this year.”

  Nathan grinned at her and she swore he was seventeen again instead of his actual age of thirty-five. His blue eyes shone brightly as he hopped off the ladder and surveyed his latest achievement.

  “I am pretty awesome, aren't I?” He stood proudly with his fists on his hips, a happy smile spread on his face. “This party is my favorite every year and this one is probably my best yet.”

  “Why did you decide to pull out all the stops this year?” Lenny picked up a box of extra decorations, handing it to Nathan and then picking up another one for herself. He followed her through the house and towards the garage.

  “I don't know, last big hurrah I guess.”

  Lenny spun suddenly, nearly colliding with Nathan as she stopped short. “What? This is the last one?”

  Nathan chuckled, “I guess you haven't heard then?”

  Lenny shook her head, waiting for his explanation.

  “I completed my coaches certification a few months ago and to make a very long story short, the USOC has tapped me to be assistant coach for Team USA. I'm going to be busy for a while. Like, years.”

  “Oh my gosh, Nathan!” Lenny set her box down hastily and threw her arms around her big brother's neck. “I'm so proud of you! Congratulations!”

  Nathan shifted the his own box to one arm and hugged her back, his smile stretching from ear to ear. “Thanks, Len. I'm pretty excited about it. I've always loved coaching and the Olympics is the ultimate for me.”

  Lenny picked up her box again and they resumed their trek through the house to deposit them in the garage. She asked him questions as they popped into her head, truly looking forward to her brother's new future. As they entered the garage and Lenny turned the lights on she froze in her place by the door. She had gotten distracted by her excitement for Nathan that she had momentarily forgotten her earlier trepidation at entering this specific part of the Lodge.

  Nathan stood next to her and let out a low whistle, “That is a lot of equipment.”

  All along the back wall of the the oversized garage was a huge assortment of snowboards. It looked like a display from at an athletic gear store. Every size, shape and color imaginable adorned the entire length of the wall. Duke had expertly hung the shelving and track lighting in order to make it look like an art exhibition. A huge cabinet with a glass front showcased her various helmets, goggles and boots.

  Lenny swallowed twice before setting down her box. It was an odd feeling, like walking into a funeral of someone you used to know well but just didn't anymore.

  “You okay?”

  Lenny snapped her eyes to Nathan, his face was filled with concern. Her throat was dry and she swallowed again before she answered.

  “I'm fine.” Her voice was clipped and and she knew he didn't believe her but she didn't want to have this conversation.

  “Lenny,” Nathan had already set his box down and he took a hesitant step towards her, “let's talk about it.”

  Lenny stiffened. “There's nothing to talk about. I'm fine. We have a party to get ready for.” She spun on her heel and left the garage with Nathan hot on her trail.

  “There's no way you're okay, you're very clearly not okay.” He wasn't exactly shouting but his voice was louder than Lenny thought necessary. She ignored him and rounded the corner leading down a
long hallway that would take her to the dining room. She had a lot to get done before the caterer arrived.

  “Lenny, please!” Nathan grabbed her elbow from behind and she yanked it away. “I'm your brother, please talk to me about it.”

  Hot tears started to burn the back of Lenny's eyes and she grit her teeth in frustration. She came into the dining room and ran full on into Duke. He grabbed her by her forearms to keep her from falling but he didn't miss the agitated look on her face. She turned away and tried to move past him.

  “What's going on?” Duke asked, not letting go and directing his question more at Nathan than Lenny.

  “She won't talk to me.” Nathan's frustration was obvious.

  “About what?” Duke's deep frown looked down into Lenny's eyes and she silently begged him to not pursue this.

  “The same thing she always hides from...snowboarding.” Nathan ran his hand through his short hair and let out an exasperated growl. “Just forget it. I have to get to the airport.” He paused and took a deep breath. “I'm sorry, I hope this doesn't ruin your night.” He exchanged a look with Duke and left them alone.

  Duke's frown stayed put and Lenny felt her heart rate returning to normal.

  “You okay?” He asked, letting go of her arms finally.

  “Yeah.” Lenny gave a him a small smile and cleared her throat. “Um, can you put the ladder in the foyer away? I'm going to go take a shower.”

  Duke nodded but he didn't say anything. Lenny headed to her room, relieved that Duke had been there. Always backing her play.

  ***

  The music had started pulsing long before the party started. Nathan hired a DJ every year and they had moved the furniture in the ginormous living room to make way for a dance floor.

  Lenny wondered if Nathan was back yet. If Luke was there.

  She had spent considerable extra time getting ready. She hadn't seen Luke in a while and she wanted to look...pretty. She curled her hair in loose waves that hung down her back and lined her eyes with charcoal, giving a slight smoky effect. She considered wearing a party dress but settled on skinny jeans and a dark purple top that showed off her shoulders.

  Nathan's New Year's Eve parties were unique in that they were amazing and alcohol free. He wasn't taking any kind of an ethical stand. They were a family of athletes, and winter was the height of training, it just never combined well. When Duke moved in, an alcohol free environment became the rule since he was a recovering alcoholic. It was one of the reason's Lenny had been so impressed with the band's support of Mike's sobriety. It was an obvious indication of loyalty and devotion.

  But the lack of alcohol never made the party dull by any means. Nathan's frat brothers usually had a pool tournament, snowmobile races in the back and of course dancing.

  Lenny took a deep breath and looked at herself in the mirror one last time.

  ***

  Cody rubbed her temples with her fingertips while Clara prattled on and on about something she had absolutely no interest in whatsoever. Where did she find these people? Oh yeah, they were her friends. The limo bumped along the snowy road and Cody knew they were getting closer to their destination.

  She took a slim bottle out of her purse and drained the remaining contents. She knew Lenny's little soiree would be dry and she was going to need to be decently lubricated if she planned on being a good guest.

  “What is that?” Erin asked, her wide brown eyes watching Cody swallow the remaining liquid in a flourish.

  “Fun in a bottle.” Cody winked, “want some?” She produced a second bottle and uncapped it, handing it to Erin.

  Erin took a swallow and sputtered; she passed it to Clara sitting next to her who also took a swallow.

  “I thought there was no drinking at this party.” Clara downed more than she needed and Cody was delighted. This might be more fun than she had originally anticipated.

  “That's why we have to do it now.” She answered and took the bottle back and poured more down her throat and shoved the bottle back in Erin's hands. She raised her eyebrows in silent expectation and Erin caved. She tipped the bottle back and took several gulps. Cody pursed her lips, this was most definitely going to be fun.

  ***

  Lenny hugged Cody in greeting, shocked that she had shown up at all. They hadn't spoken since Denver and she hadn't intended to invite her. Cody had brought her usual entourage of girls in skimpy party dresses but it was the overwhelming smell of vodka that rolled off of the group that made Lenny recoil.

  “Have you been drinking?” Lenny asked in Cody's ear. The response was loud laughter followed by Cody heading for the dance floor.

  Lenny shook her head disgustedly, going back to the kitchen to check on the caterers. That girl was walking a line that Lenny never understood. She wanted to throw her out but she also didn't want to end the party just as it was starting.

  She found Duke who had actually dressed up a little, for Duke anyway. He was wearing his nicest flannel and he’d trimmed his beard. He looked at Lenny with a twinkle in his gray eyes and stole another little sandwich off of a tray that a young girl was feverishly trying to fill.

  “I’m glad you decided to come off the mountain and join us.” Lenny smiled and got a bottle of water out of the fridge.

  “Well, someone has to keep an eye on the food.” He winked at the little attendant again as she moved the tray out of his reach.

  “You should come mingle, Cody is here. She brought her usual entourage.”

  “How ‘bout Nate the Great?”

  “Yeah, his old frat brothers are here, makes for a weird mix.” Lenny laughed at the absurdity. Cody’s friends were all in their early twenty’s whereas Nathan’s friends were a good ten years older and had careers.

  Just then, someone came up behind Lenny and touched her elbow. She turned to see Luke’s smiling face. A thousand different frequencies of joy washed over her. She impulsively put her arms around him, hugging him close.

  “Hey, you.” She greeted warmly.

  ***

  Luke held her a little tighter and a little longer than would normally be socially acceptable. He breathed in her familiar scent and made a rumbling noise in the back of his throat that could only be described at pure contentment. He had missed her.

  The man Lenny had been talking to cleared his throat from behind her and Luke released his embrace. He looked into steel grey eyes and stuck out his hand.

  “Hi, I’m Luke Casey.”

  “Duke.” The man replied with a firm handshake.

  The way Lenny and Cody had spoken of him, he had expected an old man. Instead, he found himself face to face with someone maybe only five years or so older than himself. His athletic build was evident despite his thick flannel shirt and Luke found himself standing a little straighter. This was the guy Lenny had been living with for the past week?

  “Duke, this is the lead singer for Double Blind Study.” Lenny introduced and Luke struggled with his sudden desire to put his arm around her possessively.

  “Right, the circus you left town with.” Duke nodded.

  Luke squinted slightly, trying to decipher the undertones in which Duke spoke.

  Mike, Sway, Harrison and Blake descended upon Lenny at that moment, crowding the kitchen and making it even harder for the caterers to maneuver.

  Blake picked Lenny up and gave her a bear hug. She squealed in surprise and slapped his shoulder so he would put her down. She hugged the rest of the guys, happy to see them, then introduced them to Duke as well. Handshakes happened all around, manly grunting and stiff greetings. Lenny must have noticed the subtle tenseness that lingered and tried to break it up.

  “Let’s get out of the kitchen so these people can do their jobs.” She led them out to the open living room where the dancing was in full combustion. Luke saw Cody at the center of the mess and he wasn't surprised.

  Some girls spotted the rockers and pulled most of them onto the dance floor. Luke hung back, wanting a few minutes alone with Lenny if
it was available. It had been far too long since he had kissed her perfect lips. He slipped his arm around her waist resting his hand high on her hip, having brief eye contact with Duke but acting as casual as possible.

  Maybe Duke picked up on Luke's not so subtle hint, maybe he was just hungry but he suddenly announced he needed more sandwiches and left Luke and Lenny alone together.

  Lenny watched the band members dancing with Cody's friends and she scrunched up her nose. “Maybe this was a bad idea.”

  “You’re not on duty, they’re gonna be fine.” Luke lightly laughed at her reaction.

  A thin girl with short, caramel colored hair was laughing too loudly and Luke suspected she had been drinking before her arrival. She staggered off the dance floor and came towards Lenny.

  “Do you know where some water is? I'm so thirsty.” Then she burst into giggles again.

  Lenny pulled the girl towards the kitchen stopping just in the doorway. She ducked inside and came back quickly, handing the girl a bottle of water. As the girl thirstily sucked the water down Luke saw Lenny's face become unreadable.

  ***

  “How do you know Cody?” Lenny asked the girl tightly.

  “I'm Erin, I met her through my boyfriend, well, I guess he’s not really my boyfriend, I don’t know what we are.” Erin giggled again and a hiccup escaped.

  “Where is he tonight?” Lenny tried to sound casual but she was getting the weirdest sensation in the pit of her stomach.

  “He said he shouldn’t come because it would be too hard to see his ex and he thought she might be here.” Erin rambled nervously and looked around the room like she was expecting the girl to pop out and scare her. “It took him a long time to get over her, I guess she really broke his heart.”