The Man Who Has No Sight (Soulless Book 4)

by Victoria Quinn

  She smiled. “Thank you, Deacon.” She took the card from my hand and placed the clutch under her arm. “I’m not usually this confused, I promise.”

  “I know, Kathleen. Don’t worry about it.” I turned away.

  “Deacon.” Her hand went to my arm.

  I turned back to her, suspecting something was wrong, like she was about to be sick or something.

  But she just stared at me, her eyes moving to my lips.

  What the fuck was happening right now?

  Then she moved in and tried to kiss me.

  I turned away and stepped back, unable to believe that had just happened. I started to suspect it might happen once she looked at my lips, but I’d assumed my instincts were wrong, because that kind of behavior just didn’t make sense. “Kathleen…” I knew she’d been drinking, but she wasn’t that drunk. She was aware of her faculties, so she knew exactly what she was doing.

  “Deacon, I’m sorry. I just…noticed that your pants are a little tight every time you’re around me.” She ran her fingers through her hair, flustered at my rejection.

  That was a really shitty coincidence, but I really didn’t want to talk about my hardness with her when the conversation was so fucking inappropriate. “Kathleen, you asked me out, and I gave you my answer. There’s nothing wrong with a romantic relationship between colleagues at the lab, but I made it clear I’m not interested. Now, this happens…when you know I’m in a relationship with someone. It’s borderline sexual harassment, and if it’s something that you can’t control, maybe we can’t work together. I respect your research and find you to be an asset to our team, but if you can’t remain professional, then I don’t know how this is going to work.” I was angry, but I controlled the volume of my voice to keep it low, so I wasn’t seen screaming at a woman in front of her door. But it pissed me off that she continued to put me in these awkward situations when I was committed to professionalism. I’d never given her the impression I was interested, so I didn’t understand how else to make this stop.

  She looked at the floor for a while, like she was embarrassed. “I apologize for misreading you…”

  “You know I’m with Cleo, Kathleen.”

  “I realize that. But…we make much more sense than you two.” She turned back to me, looking me in the eye. “We’re both accomplished physicians who have so much in common. You’re gorgeous and so am I. I’m sorry, no offense to her, but how can a relationship with an assistant last very long? I know it has an expiration date, and I guess…I grew impatient.”

  I thought Cleo was insecure for thinking so little of herself, but I guess that was exactly how people viewed her…though it wasn’t right. Listening to someone talk down about her because of the way she made a living was disgusting, how Kathleen thought she was superior. “I’m asking her to marry me.”

  Kathleen continued to stare at me, but her breathing increased, like she was mortified by my words. Her eyes slowly drifted down to my chest.

  “I have a ring…and I’m ready.”

  She crossed her arms over her chest.

  “She and I don’t have an expiration date.” We were forever. I hadn’t planned to ask her to marry me so soon, but after talking with Tucker, I changed my mind. I refused to ask her to move in with me because that wasn’t the question I wanted to ask. I wanted more than that. I knew she was my mate for life, and the best way to express that was through marriage. It made me realize it was senseless to wait, not when these feelings were so strong, not when she loved me so deeply…for me. We were already at that level of commitment. I’d been there for a long time, remaining celibate when she wasn’t even mine. “I’m offended you see her that way…when I don’t see her that way at all.”

  “I’m sorry—”

  “I think it’s best if you find a new research team.” I’d never fired anyone before because I was so selective in who I hired. It was a shame, because Dr. Hawthorne was brilliant, but she didn’t know how to respect her colleagues. “I will give you the grace to quit so this doesn’t follow you everywhere you go. But if you don’t…I will fire you.”

  I entered my room, washed my face, and then undressed and got into bed.

  The second my conversation with Kathleen was over, my mind turned back to the video waiting on my phone, the one thing I’d been looking forward to all day. I stripped off my clothes, got into bed, and then played the video.

  Fuuuuuuck.

  She lay in the center of my bed, the phone propped on the headboard above her so it pointed down, showing her naked body, her knees apart, her fingers between her legs. She seemed unsure at first, self-conscious that she was doing this, but after she touched herself for a while, she seemed to forget about the video altogether.

  And she just got herself off.

  I slathered my dick in lotion I’d found on the bathroom counter and jerked myself off hard, coming before the video ended, not even hitting the halfway mark. Then I lay there, my come all over my stomach, and continued to watch her rub her clit and finger herself until I was hard again.

  Sixteen

  Cleo

  The second I saw Deacon’s name on my phone, I blushed.

  I was alone in the office, so I answered. “Hey.” He’d texted me after he watched the video, saying he got off to it a couple of times. It was the most scandalous thing I’d ever done, and I still couldn’t believe it happened…and that he liked it so much.

  “Hey, baby.” His deep voice was affectionate, filled with love.

  I just sat on the phone, awkward when I shouldn’t be. It’d been a day since I’d sent that video, so it was in the past now, but I still felt my neck grow hot when I thought about the whole thing. “I’m excited for you to be home tomorrow.”

  “Me too. That video made me miss you more than I already did.”

  “Then it wasn’t very effective.”

  “On the contrary, it was too effective.”

  I stared down at my desk, the phone to my ear.

  “I can’t wait to fuck that pussy.”

  I felt my stomach tighten as my eyes darted around to make sure no one heard that, even though I was alone and Matt and Anna were elsewhere.

  Deacon probably figured out I was at my desk because he stopped talking about it.

  “How did your presentation go?”

  His mood changed noticeably, turning sour when he’d been sexy and playful a second ago. “Good.” He didn’t give any details about it.

  “Are you sad the week is over?”

  “Not even a little bit,” he said, still cold.

  “Everything alright? Your mood just really dropped.”

  “I just…” He sighed into the phone. “I’m just ready to come home.”

  I didn’t believe that was the truth, but he obviously didn’t want to talk about it, so I let it go.

  “How’s my little man?”

  “He’s good. Yesterday, he started asking when you’ll be back.”

  “Sounds like he misses me…”

  “We both miss you. He talks about you all the time, something you said or something you’ve done together in the past.”

  His joy returned. “I told him he was my best friend, then he asked if he could have more than one…because Tommy is also his best friend.”

  “Aww…”

  “So, I guess I have to share.”

  “Well, he has to share you too…because you’re my best friend.”

  He didn’t say anything, but it was somehow obvious he was touched by that.

  “So, I have some good news…”

  “Yeah?”

  “I got that raise.”

  “Really?” he asked in surprise. “That’s awesome. I didn’t know you talked to him.”

  “Yeah, a few days ago.”

  “Did he give you the full amount?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I’m not surprised. He knew you deserved it.”

  “He just told me not to ask for another.”

  “With th
at salary, you don’t really need to. It’s fair compensation for the amount of work you do.”

  “Thanks. And thank you for encouraging me.”

  “I knew you were worth it.”

  I didn’t get my next check for two weeks, so I was excited to see those numbers in my bank account. I’d managed to recover from my economic loss by staying with Deacon for a few months and not paying rent…or utilities…or food. I actually felt pretty guilty about it. But I knew he would never take a dime from me. “I know it’s late, so I’ll let you go. I’m so excited to see you tomorrow.”

  “Me too, baby. Love you.”

  “Love you too.”

  Deacon didn’t get home until late the following night.

  Derek tried to stay awake, but he couldn’t. He fell asleep on the couch.

  I knew Deacon would be anxious to see him, but it was a school night, so he’d probably prefer to have him in bed anyway.

  I sat on the couch beside Derek and waited, so anxious and inexplicably nervous. It’d been a long week, the longest amount of time I’d ever been alone with Derek. I got him ready for school in the morning and dropped him off. Then I worked through the day, got notifications from Patricia when he was picked up from school and taken to the residence. Then I came home and relieved her. I cooked dinner, made sure Derek finished his homework and did his chores, and then we watched TV together, colored, or read a story. I had no experience with children, but with Derek, I just knew what to do.

  The doorknob turned and Deacon stepped inside, wearing jeans, a sweater, and his thick black coat. He pulled his luggage in behind him.

  I jumped up and rushed into his chest, my arms wrapping around his neck as I sealed a kiss on his lips.

  He was ready for it, like he was just as anxious to touch me as I was to touch him. His arms locked around me, and he squeezed me against him, kissing me like he’d been gone months instead of a single week. His hand slid into my hair and his kiss deepened, like our separation made him fall more in love with me.

  I closed my eyes and treasured this moment, treasured this joy. I was so happy, and I wasn’t sure if I would always be this happy, if we would always have this…because it could all change in an instant.

  He ended the kiss and rested his forehead against mine. “Baby, I missed you.”

  “I missed you too.”

  He kissed my forehead before he released me. He spotted Derek on the couch and walked over, sitting beside him and placing his hand on his head, his fingers gliding through his son’s thick hair.

  I sat on the coffee table and watched Deacon stare at his son. “He tried to stay up, but…”

  As if I wasn’t there at all, he ran his fingers through Derek’s hair, lost in quiet contentment, like he was happy just to look at his son after the long week. He moved his hand to his back, right over his heartbeat, like he wanted to feel life at his fingertips.

  He scooped him into his arms and carried him to bed.

  I waited in the living room in case Derek woke up, so they could have a moment together.

  But Deacon returned right away.

  “Are you hungry? Because I have leftovers—”

  “No. I just want to go to bed.” He grabbed his luggage and pulled it into the bedroom.

  I followed him, knowing he wasn’t in the mood to talk. There was one thing on his mind, and it was really obvious based on the way he looked at me, the way he turned demanding. He stripped off his clothes and left them on the floor before he pulled my shirt over my head then palmed my bare tits with his big hands. His lips moved to my neck, and he kissed me hard, sucking at my delicate skin, his teeth even grazing across it.

  I pushed down my sweatpants and underwear as I leaned my head back, letting him kiss me, letting him eat me. I listened to his deep breaths against my ear, felt my body grow wet even though I’d been pleasing myself all week.

  Once the clothes were off, he dragged my hips to the edge and then slid inside me, sinking into me in one single thrust, gliding through my channel like I’d been ready for him all week.

  He had the sexiest moan, like his slick hand had been no comparison. He pushed himself inside completely, his balls against my ass, and gripped my thighs as he tugged me into place, his feet flat on the rug, his muscular body straight and tight. Then he thrust into me at an even pace, quick but not hard, deep but not slow. His eyes locked on mine, and he gripped me in place as his hips worked to fuck me, to coat the cream along his base, to hit my cervix just enough to remind me how big he was.

  Like I could ever forget.

  It wasn’t fucking, but it wasn’t lovemaking either. It was somewhere in between, and that’s what made it perfect. He was a man who needed to fuck after being alone for a week, but he also loved me, also wanted to reconnect our souls as well as our bodies.

  I lay there and enjoyed it, watching this drop-dead gorgeous man struggle not to come with every thrust, like my wet pussy was too much for him to resist, like this was what he’d been thinking about all week…and nothing else.

  When I woke up the next morning, Deacon was already showered and ready to go.

  I sat up in bed, disappointed he was already heading to work. When I looked at the time, I realized I needed to hustle if I was going to get Derek to school on time. “Why did I sleep in so late?” I squinted at the time on the nightstand.

  He came out of the closet, dressed and ready to go. “I’ll take Derek to school.”

  “Oh…okay.” Now, I was so used to it that it felt odd letting someone else take over.

  He sat at the edge of the bed and looked down at me, his hand sliding into my hair and cupping my face.

  My fingers wrapped around his wrist, loving when he touched me like that. “I’m surprised you’re going to the office today.”

  “I’m not. Just wanted to take Derek to school and let you sleep in a bit.”

  “You’re the one who deserves to sleep in…” He’d had a long flight and a long night.

  His fingers played with my hair. “You think you could carve out some time for me today? You know, before Derek gets home.”

  I smiled then turned my face into his palm, placing a kiss there. “I can take a long lunch.”

  “Good.” He leaned down and kissed me on the lips. “Because we have to make up for the week we lost.”

  Deacon made dinner and spent his evening with Derek. He helped him with his homework, worked on the LEGO set in the living room in front of the TV, and spent all his time catching up with his son.

  I didn’t mind. I’d gotten his attention during my lunch break.

  When it was time for bed, Deacon had Derek brush his teeth and change into his pajamas. After he tucked him in, he returned to me on the couch. He sat beside me, his arm around my shoulder. “I know I was pretty absorbed with Derek today—”

  “I know you wanted to spend time with him. Don’t worry about it.” He didn’t need to explain himself to me. “Besides, I had the best lunch of my life…and we didn’t even eat.” I pressed my fingers against his chin and gently grazed over the stubble, smiling at him.

  He grabbed my wrist and positioned my fingers against his lips so he could kiss them. “I’m happy to be home.” He kissed the inside of my palm then my wrist before he lowered my hand.

  I stared at his face, hypnotized by his gentleness, shocked by the way he loved me…and the way I loved him. But with every moment of joy, a second of anxiety followed it, along with a waterfall of guilt.

  “Everything alright?”

  “Yeah…why?”

  “You suddenly look sad.”

  I had no idea he could read me so well. He used to be oblivious, but now he was in tune with my feelings, sensing them without even trying. He’d made so much progress, and I never thought that would bite me in the ass. “No…just glad you’re home.”

  His fingers moved into my hair next, pushing it from my face, examining my features. He did that for a long time, like he didn’t need a conversation to con
nect with me, just a look was enough for him.

  I held his gaze, feeling safe with him, like there was nothing that could ever hurt me. It was his soothing energy, his openness.

  After a few minutes, he dropped his fingers from my face, his mood noticeably darkening. “There’s something I need to tell you…”

  That safety net was gone. Now, I was uneasy, unsure what he would say. “Okay.”

  “I considered keeping it to myself. Seemed like the best decision. But now, I’m looking at you…and I know I can’t keep it from you.”

  That was like a punch to the stomach.

  His eyes shifted away from mine as he gathered his thoughts. “Toward the end of the conference, we were having dinner with some colleagues. Dr. Hawthorne had been—”

  “Oh my fucking god. I’m gonna knock this bitch out.”

  He stilled at my words, like he didn’t know if he should continue. “Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything…”

  “What did she do?”

  “She asked me to walk her to her room…and then she kissed me. Well, tried to kiss me.”

  I was a pretty reasonable person, but my patience with this bitch had ended. I wanted to bruise up that pretty face and put her picture on the side of a milk carton because they hadn’t found her body. I just shook my head, my lips pressed tightly together.

  “I told her she needed to resign. If she didn’t, I would fire her.”

  At least it had a happy ending. “Good. Is that it?”

  After a pause, he nodded. “I told her I wanted us to have a professional relationship, but that didn’t seem possible, so it was best to part now. She didn’t argue with me. She just accepted it.”

  “You didn’t give her much of a choice.”

  He shrugged. “I was honestly pretty offended by the entire thing.”

  “Offended that a beautiful woman wanted to kiss you?” I asked incredulously.

  “I’ve made my commitment to you perfectly clear. It is offensive. It’s turning into sexual harassment, and I take that very seriously. It’s not just gender-based. All individuals, regardless of sex, should have the respect they deserve. I feel like she doesn’t respect my wishes, that she’s putting me in situations that compromise my relationship with you.”