Heart on Fire

by Brandy L Rivers

  “Sorry.” It was all she had to offer without saying something nasty about Rene.

  “Thanks. I wish I knew how to make her stop coming around. Telling her isn’t working. And now she’s ruined a great evening.”

  Shaking her head, she admitted, “She didn’t. Tonight was fun. I enjoyed your friends.”

  He looked down at the ground a second before lifting his gaze to hers. “I know you’ll probably start working on grading papers soon, but I was hoping for one kiss before I leave you, unless you want to hangout for a while.”

  More was tempting, but she wasn’t ready. “A kiss, but I’m not sleeping with you tonight.” She cringed at the desperate note in her voice.

  “I didn’t ask you to.”

  He moved closer, and she moved back. She found herself pressed against the kitchen island as he closed the distance. His hands landed on the counter, on either side of her hips, but he stayed an inch from her as his eyes delved into her soul, washing away the doubt and fear in the wake of desire she hadn’t felt in so long.

  His voice was low and soft. “We said slow, and making love would be too fast. Right now, I only want to know your taste.”

  She couldn’t quite catch her breath as she stared at his full lips and gulped. It had been a long time since she craved a man’s touch.

  His mouth met hers in a slow, sensual caress. A shock of recognition jolted through her, and she opened to him. His tongue swept in, and his arms wrapped around her, crushing her to his chest. One hand trailed down to squeeze her ass, pulling her flush against his rigid length.

  Breathless, she pulled back, trying to remember not to rush.

  He took a step away. “You taste so damned good, Mila, but I need to go if I plan to keep my word.”

  “Sorry,” she whispered, closing her eyes. Mila was ready to beg him for more, but she promised herself she wasn’t going there. Damn her if she didn’t want him.

  “One more kiss. Then I’ll go,” Kyle promised.

  She wanted him so bad she didn’t protest when he closed the distance a second time. His tongue caressed hers as his hands wrapped around her waist.

  Their chemistry was electric, consuming. Her breath caught as his hand slid into her pants, his fingers digging into her flesh as he rocked his hips against her. Her head fell back as his other hand slid up her shirt, over her breast.

  Recalling the promise to herself, she reached for his wrist.

  He backed away with a groan. “Sorry. I need to go. I’m having trouble remembering the boundaries we set. I’ll call you in the morning.”

  He wasn’t the only one forgetting the lines they’d drawn. Part of her wanted to abandon any rules, but she had to think of Cherish. “Go before I can’t remember why we shouldn’t.”

  He backed out the door. “Sweet dreams.”

  She watched as he hurried across the yard and through the gate, unable to tear her eyes away as her heart thumped in her chest. Kyle had the potential to break her heart.

  Chapter 9

  Kyle hardly slept. All he could think about was Mila, her taste, her passion, and how she moved against him like she couldn’t get enough. He left her speechless, probably because she wanted more too. If anything, he respected her more for her self-control.

  As soon as he had his mouth on her, it felt like he’d been there before, with her, which was impossible. He was drawn to her, she belonged in his arms, and he needed to see her happy.

  Walking away from her the night before was the hardest thing he’d ever done. He vowed to find a way to prove himself to her, to find a way into her heart. It cut into him every time she started to get nervous and shut him out. He understood her reasoning, but he had no intention of letting them fall apart.

  Fuck. If Gavin knew what I was thinking, he’d be laughing his ass off at me for chicking-out. And I don’t give a damn.

  In desperate need of a distraction, Kyle decided a run was in order. He was dressed, and out the door. Pushing away all thought, he tried to focus on the steady rhythm of his feet hitting the pavement.

  Didn’t help. His mind kept drifting back to last night.

  A car slowed to drive alongside him. He didn’t have to look to know it was Rene. When he did finally look over, she appeared hung-over, maybe even still drunk.

  Her voice was full of sugary sweetness. “Hey baby, want a ride?”

  Kyle didn’t stop, his anger fueled a burst of speed. “That would defeat the purpose of running.”

  “You didn’t stay the night with your teacher. She throw you out? Were you too pushy? She seems awfully shy, damn near virginal.” Rene’s laugh was cold and shrill. “That’s it, isn’t it? Probably had sex exactly once, wound up pregnant, and now she’s scared to have a man too close?”

  Grinding his teeth he shot Rene a cold look. “She’s a friend. I didn’t go over to sleep with her.”

  “You went in the back door though, not the front. Afraid I was watching?” she taunted.

  He barely held back the scream of frustration. “What do you want, Rene?”

  “You. I want you back,” she said in all seriousness. “Come on, I’ll change.”

  “No, you won’t.” Not to mention it wouldn’t matter if she did.

  “I will.”

  He laughed out loud. “In the last week, I’ve seen you around town with at least three different men. If you wanted me so bad, why run around with everyone else. Besides, you know I’m not going to change.”

  “Come on. Those dates don’t count. You haven’t given me much hope. Why should I change until you do? You need a real job with a real future.”

  “I have both. I don’t expect you to understand. But that is the exact reason I won’t make the same mistake again. You want a man you can bend to your will. That is not me. Good luck in finding what you want.” He turned off the street and down the trail.

  She screeched after him.

  He followed the path behind the houses for a mile. As he approached Mila’s, he heard the lawnmower and frowned. He’d planned to offer to do her yard.

  Kyle snuck past her place, and climbed over his fence to go to the gate between their yards.

  He called out, “Hey, Mila.”

  She didn’t jump this time, but stopped the mower and came over with a shy smile. “Morning, Kyle. You eat yet?”

  “Nope. I was running.”

  “That’s why you didn’t answer when I called.” She glanced back at her house. “Want to come over for omelets? I’ll be done with my lawn in a minute.”

  One brow arched. “Give me ten. I need a quick shower and I’ll be over.” He leaned against the fence and offered her an out. “If you’re sure, that is.”

  “I wouldn’t invite you if I wasn’t.” This time, there was only confidence in her gaze, and it shot straight to his stupid cock.

  “I’ll be quick.”

  “Anything you don’t like on your omelet?”

  “Nope, and I’m guessing you use the good cheese.”

  “Mmhmm. Go get that shower.”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  * * * *

  Ten minutes later, Mila was in the kitchen preparing breakfast. Kyle knocked and her face lit up. She couldn’t remember ever feeling this excited about seeing anyone.

  “It’s open,” she called.

  He stepped inside.

  She looked over and returned his ten-megawatt smile.

  Kyle leaned against the counter. “I was going to offer to do your lawn.”

  She shrugged before turning to pull more ingredients from the fridge. “Why? I’m perfectly capable.”

  “I see that.” His deep rumble lit a fire within her.

  When she didn’t say anything, he asked, “Want a hand?”

  “I’ve got this. You managed all the grilling last night. I’m sure you had plenty of work cleaning up. If I had thought about it, I would have offered to help.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I needed a distraction after our goodnight kiss.”
r />   “All right,” she smiled over her shoulder and found him inches behind her. “Hey,” it came out breathless.

  With him so close, she could feel the heat of his skin, tempting her to lean back against him.

  “About last night, I’m sorry I got carried away,” he told her, but he didn’t look sorry.

  “Wasn’t only you.” She turned back to the omelet and took a slow breath. Swallowing the thread of fear that tried to wind around her heart, she admitted, “I haven’t been this attracted to anyone since… well, for a long time. So yeah, I’m afraid, but not of you. I have a past.”

  He started to say something.

  She cut him off. “You’re not a bad guy, Kyle. But I have Cherish to think about.”

  “Why won’t you let me in? I want to know you.”

  “I’m afraid you’ll hurt me like everyone else has.”

  His hand curled around her waist, and he placed his forehead on her shoulder. “What happened to make you shut everyone out?” The tender way he asked pulled at her heart.

  She took a deep breath. “I spent three years thinking I would marry the man I was with in college. Things didn’t work out that way. He wanted, or rather demanded, I give up my student teaching job to move with him to New York for his career. He wanted me to throw away everything I’d accomplished and follow him. He didn’t care about what I wanted, my goals, or my dreams.”

  When she glanced back, his head lifted and their eyes locked. “I wasn’t willing to give everything up. I walked out, thinking he would come to his senses and at least try to compromise. He didn’t call, didn’t knock on my door, nothing. A week later, he made sure I saw him with another woman, someone I thought was a friend. They were engaged shortly after.” It didn’t hurt anymore, but she still hated herself for not figuring Paul out sooner.

  Kyle watched her, studying her, taking in everything she said without judgment.

  While he was listening, she figured it was the right time to lay out the rest of the story. “After a month of moping, focusing only on school and student teaching, my best friend dragged me to a party. I had this stupid idea that I would go, be someone else for once, and do everything I wanted for a single night to get Paul out of my system.”

  She smiled sadly. “It worked. I stopped thinking about my ex, because a man better than anything I could imagine was totally taken by me, and swept me off my feet. My fear kept me from learning his name, or anything else about him. Selfish maybe, but I didn’t want any attachments. I needed to be me for a while.”

  Kyle interrupted. “For the record, I want a hell of a lot more than one night with you, but I don’t want to change you.” His arms wrapped around her waist, hugging her. Against her ear, he told her, “And the ex sounds like an asshole. No matter what happens, I won’t give you ultimatums. A relationship is supposed to be about give and take, not one side demanding everything.”

  She melted against him, starting to believe Kyle was sincere. He hadn’t given her a single reason to doubt him, but she didn’t know how to let go of her insecurities.

  His lips pressed behind her ear before he murmured, “Is this too much?”

  It felt good, really good. She sighed. “If you want breakfast, yes. So hang on.”

  He backed up with an apologetic nod.

  Deciding to take a chance and let their physical relationship move forward, she added, “Cadence already called to tell me they were keeping Cherish until this afternoon. I won’t kick you out if you have nothing to do.” She hoped he stayed, and that she could protect her heart.

  He leaned against the counter with a smile. “All right.”

  Fighting back her grin, she threw things together and got them in the skillet. “So what do you have planned for today?”

  “I work tonight, but I’ll be around until three. I’ll make you lunch. If you want to come over later?”

  “Sorry. Dee already planned a lunch date. Maybe after breakfast we can visit that café and I can get you a coffee.”

  “Deal.” He gave her a slow sexy smile that drew her eyes to his lips, and that dimple.

  Last night played through her head. She needed a distraction before she burned breakfast. “So why did you decide to be a fireman?”

  His expression softened. “To follow in my dad’s footsteps. He was injured a few years back and retired. Took a while but he recovered. Now he lives in Hawaii with his wife.”

  The way he lit up when talking about his father reminded Mila of how she thought of hers. “I take it you look up to him?”

  “I do. He’s always been my hero.” He sat back, watching her. “What about you? Do you look up to your parents?”

  “I mentioned my dad died, of a heart attack before Cherish was born, way too young. He was a good cop, and will always be my hero.” She looked out the window. “My mom has very strong and old-fashioned opinions. Dad would have supported my decisions. Mom, on the other hand, has a hard time accepting my choices.” Mila shook her head. Fighting back tears, she let out a bitter laugh. “She tried to talk me into an abortion because I didn’t know my baby’s father. I couldn’t do it. I don’t regret my daughter.”

  “I’m sorry,” he said softly as she turned to flip the omelets.

  “There’s only one thing I would change—learning his name. Not for me, but for Cherish. I never imagined I would wind up pregnant. I would never have kept him from her, and every child deserves a father.” She felt his hand on her shoulder. “Mom once told me she thought I should go back to Paul. This was right after I found out I was pregnant.”

  “Wow, didn’t you say he was with another woman the week after you left?”

  “Uh, yeah. Another reason not to bother with my ex. Mom liked him because he’s a lawyer, and could have supported Cherish and me.” The whole idea made Mila’s skin crawl.

  His brow knit together. “But before that? Your schooling, your career?”

  “Mom thought I should focus less on school and my goals, and direct my attention to getting married. I’m not opposed to marriage, but you’re right, a relationship takes compromise. Paul didn’t agree with that premise, and it took me a few years to figure that out.”

  She put the omelets on plates and grabbed a bowl of fresh fruit before taking them to the table. “Juice or milk?”

  “You have fruit, so milk.”

  Smiling, she poured them both a glass and joined him. “My Aunt Dee is great, she understands. I’m more like her than Mom anyway. So when she told me about the job at the high school, it seemed like the best move, for everyone. I’m hoping with her in another state, we’ll get along better.”

  He reached over to squeeze her shoulder. “Sounds like it. Sometimes you have to leave the nest to find your place. I didn’t come into my own until Dad moved to Hawaii. He says it helps his arthritis.” Kyle grinned. “I think it has more to do with enjoying the life of a beach bum.”

  She laughed. “That’s all he does? Chill on the beach?”

  He shook his head, humor dancing in his eyes. “Nope. Now he runs a barbeque pit with his new wife. Margaret is great, perfect for him.”

  She couldn’t help asking. “Do you see him much?”

  “Once or twice a year. He comes here most of the time, but I do go there every couple of years. Have you ever been to the islands?”

  “No. I haven’t done much traveling.” She stopped there, not wanting to delve too far and give him the wrong impression.

  Chapter 10

  Pieces of Mila’s puzzle were coming together. He was starting to understand why she had walled herself off. Now, she was letting him in, bit by bit.

  She watched him as she pushed her plate away, chewing her lip as one finger brushed back and forth on the table. She met his gaze, desire banked in her beautiful eyes.

  “About our boundaries. I’m hesitant, but I trust you. I don’t want to hold you away from me.”

  He captured her hand with a shake of his head. “I’m not pushing you, Mila. Never.”
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br />   A smile pulled at her lips. “Let me finish.”

  Nodding, he took a breath, waiting.

  “You were right. I can’t find out if we work if I don’t give us a fair chance.” She blushed and her eyes danced away. “If we wind up there, we do. I’m on birth control, but I still expect you to wear a condom.”

  One dark brow arched. “Are you suggesting we do that after coffee?”

  “Um…” Her breath caught as she nibbled her bottom lip. “I meant when we get there. Watching you walk out the door when I knew what you wanted was harder than I imagined. I spent the whole night thinking about you, and the way you touched me.”

  “You weren’t the only one,” he admitted. Kyle stood, grabbing their dishes to drop them in the sink.

  Now was the time to change the subject, before he led with his dick. “Let’s walk down to the café, and when we get back, if we’re both still on the same page, we’ll see what happens.” He took her hand, and pulled her to a stand.

  “And if I’d rather get chai later?” She stepped into him. Any sense of protest was lost when she took his mouth in an explosive kiss.

  She pulled away, her hungry eyes devouring him. “Come upstairs.”

  Need flowed through his veins, but he would give her every opportunity to change her mind because he wasn’t sure he could stop once they started. “Are you sure?” he whispered, not trusting his voice.

  She nodded over her shoulder as she ascended. “Very.”

  Relief and desire rushed through him. Relief because she wasn’t shutting him out. Desire, well that was obvious. He stalked her up the stairs, and before she could turn around, he caught her waist and pulled her against his body. Sweeping her hair over her shoulder, he nuzzled her neck. Her size and smell reminded him of one crazy night. A total sense of déjà vu enveloped him as his hand dipped into her sweats, finding her wet and ready.

  “Kyle,” she whispered, as he found her clit, as if he already knew her body. It certainly felt like it. “Oh god,” she gasped as he pressed inside.

  So damned tight.

  “When was the last time you were with someone,” he groaned.