Bad Rep (Southern Ink Book 1)

by S. N. Garza

  “Doubt it, honey and what do you mean, ever since? Ever since what?”

  “It’s nothing.”

  “It’s not nothing if your cheeks are becoming flush with embarrassment. Tell me.”

  I shook my head and said, “I don’t want to ruin this day, Patrick. It’s your day. Let’s just enjoy it and be happy.”

  “I’ll be even happier if you tell me what happened. No secrets. Not about them, Penelope.”

  “Ugh. Fine. He smacked me around, but I got away. It’s no big deal. Let’s move on, and have a good afternoon.”

  “You’re fucking kidding me? He laid a hand on you?”

  “It was a long time ago. I’m over it. Don’t worry about it. Ever since then he’s been cordial to me when we speak on the phone.”

  Patrick’s hands tightened into white hard fists. “I can't believe you didn't tell me.”

  I could hear the sadness in his voice and it sent a spike right through my heart.

  “I'm sorry I didn’t say anything, I just had a lot going on that Christmas with Deke, mom and dad.”

  “Deke? What does he have to do with anything?”

  I turned my head hoping he wouldn't notice the pink creeping up my neck and cheeks.

  “You didn't? Penny, after what he did to you? What were you thinking?”

  “It wasn’t the last time I was an idiot so let’s just move on, Patty.”

  My brother reached out and grabbed me, pulling me in close. “Pen-pen, you can tell me anything.”

  “He broke my heart. Again. And again. And I was such a fool. It had felt magical, wonderful, and perfect and then he ruined it. Each time. It’s like he wants me to hate him.”

  “And now?”

  “Now? I hope to hate him.”

  “Hope?”

  “I just can't bring myself to fully hate him. There's a part of me that wishes he was the boy I met when I was fifteen, and then the guy I saw at Christmas three years ago before he ruined it. Then my twenty-first birthday, Iridessa, some sisters and I went to Vegas and he showed up before I could get friendly with a stranger—it was like he knew the exact time to be there. Would I have regretted bedding down with a complete stranger? Maybe, but it would have been my choice.”

  Patrick kissed my temple and asked the one thing I've been dreading to answer myself.

  “If you feel this strongly about him, what was the sex like?”

  “You're my brother. I'm not discussing my sex life with you.”

  “I'm also your gay brother. You can tell me and I won't feel the need to bash him in the head for taking my little sisters virginity and what not. Well, mostly.”

  “In a word? Incandescently explosive.”

  “That's two words. And with Alan?”

  “Don't ask me that, Patrick. I don't want to compare them. I won't… That’s not what’s important.”

  “So then that’s a no. I only want you to be happy.”

  “I am. Very much so.”

  He sighed heavily and kissed my temple once more. “Alright, now let's get this shindig started. I have a man I need to ruin. Deliciously ruin.”

  “I love you, Patty.”

  “Love you more, kiddo.”

  When my brother and Michael finally left to go on their honeymoon, Alan and I relaxed in the beautiful hotel room.

  “You're going to see your parents, aren't you?”

  “Would that be such a bad thing?”

  He shrugged saying, “I wouldn't give them the time of day, but even I noticed the sad look on Patrick's face knowing they weren't there. While I would go with you, I need to get back home and to the office. So if you're going to go, go and give them hell.”

  I leaned into his lean body and nuzzle my nose into his chest hair. “You are the best, Alan.”

  “I know, baby.”

  “So will you show me what I'll be missing when I leave?”

  He pushed my body back into the mattress and did just that.

  After three years being away, Lilton has changed in a big way. There was more people, more shops and more life happening here than ever before since I've been gone.

  My plan? Not to stay long, that’s for sure. Just see my parents, get the truth and get the hell out of here. It was not thrilling to think I’ll probably get into an argument with them, but I would on Patrick’s behalf. On the outside, he pretended he didn’t give a shit, but I knew he felt differently on the inside. Especially when his partner’s side of the room had been filled with family that was supportive and happy with his life choices.

  The fact my dad couldn’t just get over it and show up for his son just really made me angry. Angrier than I’ve ever been in a long time.

  It was later in the evening when I got to Lilton. Alan’s plane had been delayed so we went sightseeing around Houston before I left to come home. It was swiftly approaching nine in the evening when I got to the Lilton city limits. I ended up stopping for gas, which had been a big mistake.

  I should’ve waited until after seeing my folks. It wasn’t like I was going to stay the night here. I was going to return the rental and catch an early flight back.

  I was finishing putting the gas nozzle away when a rumbling motorcycle drove in and parked at the gas pump across from me. Really? Two other gas spaces were available and this guy parks across from me.

  Don’t look.

  In my peripheral’s it didn’t look like Deke’s Harley but hey, who was I kidding? I hadn’t seen the guy in years, he could have upgraded or whatever.

  “Penny?”

  I was relieved to find it was only Bunko. I put up a smile I wasn’t really feeling and tilted my head to the side to see him doing the same.

  “Hey, Bunko.”

  “PENNY!” He placed the nozzle back and came around, hefting me high in the air, hugging me with big, warm arms. “So good to see you, girl!”

  “It’s good to see you, too. I was on my way to see my parents real quick before I go back home.”

  “Home? Where’s home?”

  “Still in Arizona.”

  He placed me back down and I was fixing my jacket when he sucked in a deep breath.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “You’re…you’re married?”

  His eyes opened wide on my hand and I looked down to see he was staring hard at my engagement ring. A small blush rose up my neck.

  “I’m engaged. No wedding band yet. Later this year.”

  “Holy shit. When did this happen?”

  “A little while ago. Six months.”

  “That’s uh…great. Uh, so I guess you need to see your parents. Stop by SoIn on your way out, yeah? When I tell Trixie, Castor and Johnny I saw you and you didn’t at least come by and say hi, they’ll feel left out…mainly jealous, but I don’t want them to feel like they could have seen ya, ya know?”

  Oh, crap. Now I was stuck, for sure, Bunko was going to go straight to SoIn and tell everyone I was here and that I was engaged. Sigh.

  I hadn’t realized I was staring at the ground until his finger hooked under my chin, lifting me to his gaze.

  “He’s not there today. So no worries, honey. How’s that friend of yours? Iridessa?”

  I was surprised to see him mention her. After their own one night, Iridessa had pretty much seen stars in her eyes, although she never let on. She had taken it as just a one night too and went on her merrily happy way.

  “She’s good. Just graduated. Going to grad school this year since she changed from art to nursing. And okay, I’ll come by. But I can’t stay long though. I have a plane to catch later tonight.”

  His smile was wide and beautiful like it always had been and he hugged me again.

  “That’s great. Just come and say hi.” Bunko stepped back and grabbed the gas nozzle before saying, “I’m happy for you, Penny. I hope the guy knows how lucky he is.”

  “He does.”

  I waved and went to my parents with a half-smile on my face. Bunko always did such a good job at keeping
things light. Iridessa talked about him a few times after their own hot, little encounter but then it had faded just like my hang up on Deke had.

  My parent’s car was in the drive when I pulled up. They could ask off but not bother coming to see their only son get married? I steeled my heart against the pain I felt for my brother and walked to the front door.

  It was late, but I knew they’d be up because of their work schedule. Locks were disengaging and my mother had opened the front door and gasped when she got a good look at me.

  “Penelope! What are you doing here?”

  “Patty got married today. Where were y’all when your son was getting married?’””

  My mother’s face became stricken with grief when her eyes looked to the side and I peeked around her to see my father watching the television.

  “Can I come inside?”

  “YES! Of course. I’m so sorry, Penny, come in, dear.”

  My mother opened the door and my father still hadn’t even acknowledged me.

  “Dad? Did you hear me? Where were you guys today? He could have really used your support.”

  My mother was about to respond when my father snickered and snorted. “Support? Do you think we’d ever support that…that…faggott?”

  Both mom and I cringed back at the derogatory slur.

  “Don’t speak about him like that. You go to show support for your son even though his choices seem radical to you. You go to show that even though you don’t agree with him, you still love him. I never understood how you could hate him so much. He’s been without family for decades.”

  “Don’t speak to me in that manner, Penelope. I am your father, you speak to me with respect.”

  “Unfortunately, that fact can’t be changed. I’m glad I don’t have to make this visit very long then. And I’m adult. You don’t deserve respect. You have to freaking earn it after the shit you’ve done to me.”

  He got up and made his way towards me with malice in his eyes. But this time, I was ready for it.

  “You gonna hit me, dad? Fucking go for it. I am not afraid of you.”

  His hand actually raised but he controlled himself easily enough that he just looked me up and down with disgust.

  “Get the hell out of my house. You’re no better than your brother. He’s a faggott and you’re a whore.”

  My hand rang out and cracked against his cheek. “Look.” I brought my left hand out and showed him the huge diamond Alan had gotten me. “Later this year I will be getting married and I will most certainly have Patrick walk me down the aisle. You don’t deserve to give me away. I can’t even stand to look at you.”

  My father’s eyes flashed with anger and then, no…that was not agony in those hazel depths. No way. He was just angry and bitter.

  I stepped back and went to my mother, hugging her tight.

  I whispered, “You deserve better. Leave him. You’re miserable with him, momma.”

  She sighed and patted my back. “Thank you for coming by. Be safe on your flight back to Arizona, honey.”

  I gave my father one last look and it was like he became an emotionless and empty shell. Like he was staring into nothing.

  I shook my head and I knew I’d get nowhere with him and she’d never go against him. Everything inside me deflated. I hoped my mother took my advice and left him. I could tell how miserable she was. She felt trapped. I hoped for her, that she’d come to her senses. I knew if I enlisted Patty’s help, if she wanted to, we could help her do what she needed to do. My father was poison.

  So much for giving them hell. Now, I wanted out of here more than anything. But I had one more stop to make.

  Sigh.

  SoIn. I prayed to God he wasn’t there.

  Chapter 26

  Penelope

  I hoped Bunko didn’t call him and tell him I was in town. I would’ve really had to smack him if he did. I did not want to see Deke.

  Walking into SoIn brought back so many memories of the last time I was here. Of course there was no Christmas decorations, it was only September. Castor and Bunko were working on some guys and Trixie was at her piercing station. Castor was the first to see me and he whistled real low. His eyes pursued over me, from my cowboy boots, to my short, denim skater dress and then he looked down to my hand. His eyes widened with shock before they looked into mine.

  “What you waiting for, girl? Get your hot ass over here and give us a hug.”

  I laughed as I walked up to him, his warm arms wrapped around me with brotherly affection.

  He whispered, “Missed you, honey. Glad you’re home.”

  I backed away and said, “I’m not home. I only came to say hi before I left. I have a flight to catch back to Arizona at Hobby Airport.”

  He sighed and leaned down to kiss my temple.

  “I know.”

  I turned to Trixie who greeted me with a soft smile. “Hey, Penny. Great to see you. We missed you around here.” She winked and went back to work.

  “Hey, Trixie. Where’s Johnny?”

  “Oh, Johnny—

  “He’s, uh…in back.” I turned to see the Bunko’s voice rise above hers and he waved me on back.

  “Uh, thanks. I think.”

  I went up the last step and headed to the office. Johnny didn’t do much inking anymore. He really kept to the business side unless someone specifically requested him. So him being in the office wouldn’t have surprised me. It was the way Bunko went at it. Interrupting Trixie like that when she could have easily told me he was back here.

  Whatever. One more person to see and then I was scot-free to get my ass home. My hand grabbed the door knob and twisted.

  “Hey John…ny.”

  But it wasn’t Johnny.

  Crap.

  “Hi, Penelope.”

  Deke. I groaned and stuck my head out of the door yelling, “I’m going to get you back, Bunko!”

  Then I turned back to Deke, who stood up from the second desk in the room, and made his way towards me. And he definitely had more tattoos now than he ever had before. Holy moly. Why was that so hot? He looked dangerous somehow. The way he walked up to me with pure predatory intent made my stomach flutter, my nipples tighten and core ignite. It was that confident male swagger. He looked too hot to handle. Shame it was in such an asshat. He was trouble. More trouble than a 12-gauge shot gun sawed off.

  “What are you doing here, Deke? Bunko said you weren’t even going to be here.”

  “Yeah, well, Jonny asked if I could work tonight. He had some business to take care of in Houston.”

  I nodded. “Then I’ll head on out of here then. Sorry to bother you.”

  I was about to turn when his hand shot out, his palm slapping against the hard wood of the door next to my head, slamming the door closed behind me. That sound had nothing on the sound of the lock clicking into place.

  “Deke? What are you doing?”

  His grey eyes were hard shards of steel when his hand went to mine, and he lifted it. His thumb caressed over the engagement ring and his eyes shuffled down to the diamond. His other hand clenched tight and his grip on my hip became almost painful.

  “You’re getting married?”

  “Yes, I am. I am moving on. I thought you’d be happy for me, Deke. You don’t have to ever deal with the likes of me again.”

  “Hmmm. Why did you even come here in the first place?” That snap in his voice boiled in my blood. Anger. Despair. Disappointment. Hate. It all coursed through me as I steeled myself against him.

  “Here at SoIn, or here in Lilton?”

  “Lilton. I know why you’re here at SoIn.”

  “My brother got married. My parents…they didn’t go to his wedding and even though he didn’t let it show, I knew he was upset they didn’t come to give their support.”

  He nodded and crowded me in, my back meeting the door.

  “You bring that boyfriend of yours?”

  “Fiancé, and no. He had to go back to Arizona for a meeting.”

/>   “And leave little, defenseless you here all by your lonesome? How stupid of him.”

  “Defenseless? I am not defenseless. I can take care of myself, Deke.”

  “You sure about that, babygirl?”

  “Don’t call me that.”

  My racing heart thumped hard against my chest, but I was ready for whatever cruel thing he had to say next.

  His hand met the naked flesh of my thigh and skirted upward. My hand flew to his wrist, stopping him.

  “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

  “Testing your will power.”

  I smacked his hand away, disgusted. “It’s strong.”

  “You sure about that?”

  Then his lips crashed home on mine before I could mutter a protest. What the hell? I smacked his arm, but all I felt was the warm, corded muscle of his bicep. Oh, boy. He got bigger. Sexier. This wasn’t good. My vagina clenched tight at the thought of how it would feel to have him…no!

  I was just about to push him away when his hands caressed up the back of my thighs, cupping my behind as he leaned in, and ground the hard ridge of his erection against me. We both groaned against each other’s mouths. Then he lifted me with ease and my legs around wrapped his waist. Stupid girl. But hell, he felt so good. His dick rubbed against me and I’ve been so freaking without for so long. I want him to take me.

  Then his hands took my wrists and brought them over my head. His mouth moved to my jaw then down the column of my neck. His sipping, nipping mouth made everything hazy. I ground against the long length of him, hoping to find some relief. It’s been so long since I’ve had a good long release. With one hand holding my wrists, the other curved over my body until it was at the crease of my legs, dipping between the hot flesh.

  “Deke. We shouldn’t.” I said that at the same time he pushed two fingers inside me. “Oh, God.” His fingers pumped in and out of me with steady, knowing hands.

  His breath was hot and hard against my ear. “God. Damn, baby. You are so fucking wet for me. How bad have you been needing this? Huh, baby? You need to come, don’t you Penelope?”

  Any protest I thought about making flew out of the window as I felt myself soaring higher. I was so close. Just a bit more. I gave in so easily. My pussy ground against him, hoping to find relief.