“I don’t want that life.” Connie released one of his hands and raised her palm to his cheek. “Don’t you see? I want you, exactly as you are. I want to help you make a difference for those who cannot help themselves. I’ve been thinking for a while now that I want to make a difference with my life. I want to use the horrible experiences I had with Duncan and help others who feel helpless and so very victimized. If only there had been someone who could have helped me…it would have made all the difference. I want us to work together to help those who actually need it. You make a difference in the world, Alec, and I want to help you do that.”
“But you can’t live in Cheapside with me.” Alec crossed his hands across his chest.
“Why on earth not?”
“You’re a duchess, and an earl’s daughter at that. You cannot live in the slums of London.”
A mutinous expression crossed her features, and for a moment all Alec could think of was how adorably charming she looked. He really was besotted. It was rather ridiculous, but for some reason he didn’t seem to care.
“I certainly can.” She wagged her finger at him. “Don’t you dare be telling me otherwise. I fully intend to work there with you. And I was actually hoping we could establish some sort of clinic in your surgery to help other women who are experiencing abuse like I had to endure. Women who have nowhere else to go or no one else to turn to in order to help them.”
Once, long ago, the idea of Connie wanting to work anywhere would have had him in stitches, but this brave and bold woman in front of him was as determined as he’d ever seen her. And he knew that after all she’d experienced, she really was resolved to help other women who were in a similar domestic situation as she herself had been up until Duncan’s death. He’d never been so proud of her. “You really want to work with me?”
She nodded. “Indeed, I do intend to do so. So I suggest you get used to the idea, as my mind is quite made up.”
“It is, is it?” He wanted nothing more, right at that moment, than to scoop her up into his arms and kiss her. But he didn’t want her to feel as though he wasn’t listening to her. And physically, she was still too weak for such a display.
“It is,” she replied.
Alec sighed, trying not to show the grin that was eager to spread across his face. “Well then, I’ll have you know that I won’t be having my wife and any future children of mine growing up in Cheapside, especially when I can certainly afford a house elsewhere, in a safer part of London.” He paused, as the thought of her pregnant with his child filled a deep place in his heart. Never had anything felt so right.
“But what about the surgery, and your work with the poor?”
“It’s hard work, Connie. Are you certain you want to be a part of that?” He knew she could do it, but it was by no means necessary.
“Extremely certain,” she said. “I truly want to help those who need it. My days of sitting idly by and twiddling my thumbs are well and truly over. For the last few years, every time I had to endure attending a ball, all the while pretending everything was fine, I could see how idle and purposeless my life as a duchess was. I don’t want that sort of life again. I only ever chased it because it was expected, and I wanted to please my mother. Now, after all I’ve been through, I wish to make a difference and be useful for once. To use the pain and suffering I endured to help others.”
He could understand her sentiments, as that was how he felt, too. “Very well. I will keep my surgery, and we shall travel there together and help those who truly need it. Though we shall have to revisit that when you’re pregnant, to ensure you stay safe and protected.”
A soft blush spread across her cheeks. Whether it was from the mention of children, or that he was agreeing to her working with him, he wasn’t certain. But it was delightful nonetheless.
“Oh… Then you’d be happy for me to work with you?” she asked. “Most men would forbid such a thing.”
“Then most men are fools.” A grin split his lips. “So, you’ll have me?”
A slow smile spread across her face, and Alec thought she’d never been more beautiful. “Aye. I’ll have you, Alec McGuiness,” she said, using his often-used expression. “I’ll have you, indeed.”
Unable to contain the whoop of joy, Alec leaned over her and kissed her softly. “I love you, Constance. More than I would have ever believed possible. You fill a part of me I didn’t even know was empty. And I’m going to love you until my very last breath. I promise you that with my whole heart.”
“I love you, too.” Connie wrapped her arms around his neck. “I will love you, my sinful Scot, until my very last breath.”
Epilogue
March 1858, London
Connie reread Lady Lorelie’s letter, certain she must have read the words wrong the first time around. But as she carefully studied the correspondence for the second time, paying particular attention to each and every pronouncement, she realized she had read them correctly in the first place.
Oh dear.
“Is everything all right, my darling?” Alec’s deep voice broke into her thoughts.
She glanced up to where he was sitting across the breakfast table from her, holding the Times in one hand and his coffee cup in the other, looking at her with a mixture of concern and worry. It was an expression of his she’d gotten very used to seeing lately, which only seemed to be getting more frequent with each passing day of her pregnancy.
“It’s fine, my love,” she assured him, putting down the letter and taking a nibble of some toast. She couldn’t stomach much more for breakfast at the moment, as much as Alec tried to coax her to eat something heartier. “Although your brother might not think so.”
“My brother?” Alec blinked. “What does he have to do with Lady Lorelie’s letter?” He put down the paper and regarded her quizzically.
“Well, he and your father shan’t be our only house guests when they visit next month.”
“I don’t think I like the sound of this…”
A big smile spread across her face. Sitting here and chatting with her husband over breakfast before they left to attend the surgery had become one of the most favorite parts of Connie’s day. Even if Alec had started getting overly fussy about her condition and what he considered the unsuitability of her continuing to “work” at six months pregnant.
Although she hardly considered helping those who needed her help to be work. Especially not when she took such pride and joy in the small annexure they had had built alongside Alec’s surgery, which was specifically dedicated to services helping women in need. Her little clinic, which was seeming to be making a difference. A small difference, but a difference nonetheless.
“Mind wandering again, my darling?” Alec’s voice broke into her thoughts.
With a start, Connie realized it had been. Another thing she seemed to be doing more and more with her pregnancy. “I’m sorry, my love, it was.”
He smiled in gentle understanding, and Connie felt herself fall more deeply in love with him. She couldn’t help the sigh of contentment from leaving her lips. “Goodness, I love you, husband.”
It was Alec’s turn to chuckle. “And I love you, too, my darling. I especially love how you being pregnant with my child has given your thoughts a special kind of meandering quality to them… It’s kept my mind sharp having to keep track of things.”
Connie laughed. “Yes, I suppose my thoughts do meander, don’t they? But to return to your concerns, it seems Lady Lorelie has decided to accompany Amelie for her visit here, but instead of returning straight back to the Highlands, she is going to partake in a bit of London’s season first. She’s asked if she can stay with us and Amelie, although I don’t think she’s aware your brother has also decided to come for a visit at the same time.”
“One of them will murder the other if they stay under the same roof,” Alec stated. “You do understand that, don’
t you?”
Connie smiled. “Lorelie is going to be too busy to worry about your brother—she’ll have much more important things on her mind than bickering with him.”
“What things?” There was suspicion laced in his voice, which only made Connie’s grin grow.
Alec and Iain had repaired their relationship greatly over the past year, with Connie and Alec’s frequent trips back to the Highlands to visit both Alec’s family and Amelie. But now that Connie was reaching the last few months of her confinement, Alec had put a stop to the traveling. Subsequently, both Iain and his father had decided to make the dreaded trip south and brave their loathing of England to ensure the visits continued. And it would seem Lorelie had decided to, as well.
“Perhaps you had better read her letter for yourself,” Connie said, passing Lorelie’s letter over to him. “For I don’t think you would believe me otherwise.”
It took Alec but a minute to read the missive before his incredulous brown eyes found her own. “She’s looking for a husband? What the devil…? She must be playing a prank. I couldn’t imagine Lady Lorelie coming to London to find herself an English husband.”
“’Tis no prank,” Connie replied. “Ever since the Matrimonial Causes Act was passed in January, a great deal of Scottish women wish to marry here to afford themselves a measure of protection that they still cannot receive if they married in Scotland. It makes sense she would wish to make use of the law here, even though the Act still needs many amendments.”
Connie had been thrilled when Parliament had passed the Matrimonial Causes Act, which finally provided women with some long-overdue rights in marriage and, more importantly, options for divorce. And though the legislation was far more onerous on the woman than the man, it was still a small step in the right direction.
“You really think Lady Lorelie, who is probably even more stubborn than my own brother, wishes to marry?”
“She’s an heiress who will become a countess when her father dies.” Connie shrugged. “Why wouldn’t she wish to come and select a suitable husband to ensure she has heirs for her estate? Or is it only men who do such things?”
Alec held his hands up in the air. “I admit Lady Lorelie is not your typical female, but she talks of selecting her husband like she would a horse—”
“And why shouldn’t she?” Connie interrupted. “Men do it that way all the time. Women should be no different, especially not someone in her position, who probably should look at her marriage as a business acquisition.”
“But an English husband?” Alec questioned. “That doesn’t make sense, not for someone so proudly Scottish as Lorelie MacKinnon.”
“She can leave him here when she tires of him if he’s English, can’t she?” The lady was extremely smart, in Connie’s opinion. “Though I must admit, I don’t know if she would have come if she knew Iain would be under the same roof.”
Why, the last time Connie had seen Iain and Lorelie in the same room, Lorelie had been threatening to shoot Iain with her bow and arrow after Iain had made some sort of remark about bossy Scotswomen.
It would be an interesting few months having them as guests in their house. But a fun few months, as Connie had always been highly amused after watching Lorelie and Iain bicker with each other, without fear or embarrassment.
“I actually think your brother and Lady Lorelie should marry,” Connie casually suggested.
The sip of coffee Alec had taken flew out of his mouth, and he started coughing. When the fit subsided, he glanced across at Connie like she’d lost her mind. “Are you mad, wife? I couldn’t think of a more ill-suited pair. They can’t stand each other.”
“What I think they can’t stand is their attraction to each other,” she declared, pushing her chair back and walking over to her husband. “I’ve never met two more courageous people who are so scared of love. Besides, haven’t you noticed that ever since we married eight months ago, the two of them are always finding ways to be in each other’s presence?”
Alec pushed his own chair back as Connie sat down on his lap and snuggled against him. He began to rub her aching lower back, as had become their morning ritual after finishing breakfast each day.
“I think seeing our love for each other firsthand has caused a yearning in both of them to have the same thing,” Connie said, melting against him. His touch always soothed her as nothing else could. “And even though they carry on like enemies—”
“Aye, because they are—”
“They are perfect for each other.”
Alec raised an eyebrow, his hands continuing to knead the muscles of her back. “You’ve always been a romantic at heart, my love. Just don’t play matchmaker while they are here, all right? You’ll be busy enough getting ready to welcome our beautiful baby into this world; I don’t want you stressing yourself over those two. Particularly as I think it will be a bomb the two of them set off together, instead of any fireworks you might hope for.”
“Hmm, perhaps,” was all Connie would allow. “Shall we be off, then, to the surgery, my love?”
He reached one of his hands around to softly rub across her large belly. “Are you certain you won’t stay home and rest? You are getting rather, um…well…large.”
Connie leaned back in his arms and glared at him. “Large? In light of your profession, Alec McGuiness, I would think you’d have better sense than to call a pregnant woman large!”
“My darling,” Alec whispered in her ear, his Scottish burr sending a shiver down her spine. “You’re the most gorgeous pregnant woman I’ve ever known, but ’tis my medical opinion that your belly is large. Only to be expected carrying a child of mine.”
The baby within kicked in response. Connie and Alec glanced at each other in mutual surprise before laughing.
“I think the babe is agreeing with you,” Connie said.
“Of course the babe is agreeing!” Alec exclaimed. “Boy or girl, our little one is going to be the brightest child in the country.”
Connie rested her forehead against Alec’s cheek and sighed. “I have no doubt of that, my love. If he’s anything like you, he is going to do some extraordinary things with his life.”
“And if she’s anything like you,” Alec said, “she is going to be the most gorgeous, most kind, most beautiful soul alive; just like her mother, whom I adore and love more than I ever thought was possible.”
“Oh, you’re such a sweet talker, Alec McGuiness.”
“Aye, but I’m a truthful one,” he replied. “And I do love you, Constance. I love you and our child so bloody damn much that it pulls at my heart, it does.”
Such a sense of contentment and peace flooded through her that Connie knew then and there, with every part of her body, that she belonged with him. She always had and she always would. “I love you, too, more than I ever thought it was possible to love another.”
He gently pulled her in more tightly against his chest and simply held her to him. It was bliss. Pure bliss. In his arms, she felt so completely at home that she didn’t want to be anywhere else, ever again.
This man was her love, her life, her everything.
And even though she’d gone to hell and back in her past marriage, being married to Alec was her heaven on earth, and she couldn’t think of anywhere else she would rather be than with him for the rest of her life.
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Acknowledgments
As always, I want to thank the amazing team at Entangled Publishing, who have all been so supportive of me from the get-go. A special thanks to my editor extraordinaire, Stacy Abrams! Stacy has helped whip this book into shape and has such a positive can-do attitude that it makes it an absolute pleasure to work with her! So a big thanks, Stacy, you’ve made the experience of edits a joy…which is saying a lot! I also want to thank my agent, Pamela Harty, from the Knight Agency,
who is so very supportive and is always in my corner!
A special thanks to my critique partner, Jenny McGregor, who is so talented and supportive—she’s the best!! I also wanted to thank some of the brilliant authors who have supported me on my journey so far: Jayne Ann Krentz, Collette Cameron, Stacy Reid, Megan Mayfair, Samaya T. Young, Efthalia Pegios, Amanda Knight, Carol Potenza, Annie Harland Creek, Cathleen Ross, and Sonia Stanizzo, just to mention a few (truly there are so many wonderful authors out there who have been so supportive, I could fill pages with more names). A huge thanks to my author pals in the Facebook group I’m part of, The Drawing Room—it’s an honor to be part of a group with such talented historical romance authors!
And finally, to my incredible readers—I am so appreciative to all of you who read and enjoy my stories! A big thanks to the ladies on my ARC review team—you all rock! And a special thanks to: Helen Sibbritt, Lori Farner Dykes, Janet Barrett, Donna Finlay, and Maria Dariotis, just to name some of my truly fabulous reviewers!! Truly, I can’t tell you how grateful I am to all of you who have taken the time to leave a review—means so much to me. xoxo
About the Author
Indoctrinated into a world of dashing rogues and feisty heroines when she was a teenager, Maddison Michaels is a bestselling, award-winning Australian romance author who loves to write sexy history with a dash of mystery! Her debut novel, The Devilish Duke, won the 2019 Romance Writers of Australia Historical Romance Book of the Year. Maddison lives in Sydney with her gorgeous hubby and daughter and always starts her day with a cup of liquid gold…coffee (just quietly, she’s addicted to the stuff)!
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The Sinful Scot (Saints & Scoundrels) Page 35