Kiss a Stranger

by R. J. Lewis

  “Six months. But she was hardly a relationship to me.”

  “Why?”

  “Because we’d been more friends than anything else.”

  “And when did your friendship-slash-relationship end?”

  He looked puzzled at my series of questions. “Long before you, Claire.”

  “And why did it end?”

  His jaw locked tight. “She betrayed me.”

  “How did she betray you?”

  His face darkened. “Secrets.”

  A chill danced down my spine. What did he mean by that?

  “So you let her walk away?” I eventually asked, ignoring the fear warning me to stop pushing for answers.

  “Of course I let her walk away.” Liar.

  “And would you let me walk away?”

  He froze, and then all at once he jumped out of the bed, present long forgotten. I backed away from him as he tried to approach me.

  “Would you?” I pressed. “If I told you I wanted out right here and now, would you let me go?”

  “No,” he answered solemnly, stopping in his steps. “I wouldn’t.”

  “What if I had a secret?”

  “Even if you had a secret.”

  “Why?”

  “Because you’re mine.”

  The possessive tone in his voice chilled me to the bone. Hardman’s words echoed inside of me. You’re his property.

  “I’m not yours,” I boldly replied, uncaring of the consequences. “I’m not some possession, Ben.”

  “No, you’re not a possession,” he retorted sharply, towering over me. “You’re my heart. You possess me. And I can’t live without my bloody heart. I refuse to. You’re mine and I’m yours, and that’s how it’s always going to be. So there’s no way in hell you’re going to pull out of this after watching me fall for you. I won’t let you.”

  He took one step closer to me and gripped me by the arm. Those grey eyes tore through my own as he growled, “And you better start getting that through your head. You’re not going anywhere.”

  Too speechless to respond, he turned away from me and strode out, slamming the door shut behind him.

  Never before had I been more confused about anything in my life. I couldn’t tell what was real and what wasn’t. I could feel his love, and that couldn’t be faked.

  Or could it?

  Was this all a part of his game?

  After some time, I grabbed the gift and tore the wrapping off. I opened the glossy box and saw a gold chain necklace with a beautiful green and blue boulder opal in an oval shape hanging from the chain. It must have been at least three carats.

  My breath thinned and my body tensed.

  What kind of monster would buy his plaything over a thousand dollars’ worth of jewellery?

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  I can and I will

  He hadn’t said a word about our disastrous morning. He simply dressed and left the apartment, claiming he had business to sort out. I got dressed and left just as fast, ignoring Jamie’s paralysing glances on my way out. Did he hear our conversation? He slept in the third bedroom and I wasn’t sure how soundproof these walls were.

  I was on my way home when my phone rang. I picked up upon seeing Hardman’s number, and didn’t get to say anything before he beat me to it.

  “Pull over in the parking lot of the grade school around the corner to your house, Claire,” he told me before hanging up. “My partner and I will be waiting.”

  I did as they asked and pulled into the parking lot. A grey sedan was parked in the far back corner alongside a fence. Hardman was standing tall with his back against the driver’s side door, and a redhead woman was standing in front of him. They both stopped talking and turned to me. I saw the woman’s young face pulled into a grim look that made me think whatever conversation they were having was not a friendly one.

  I carefully stepped out of the car and faced them.

  “How are you doing, Claire?” Hardman asked me with a worried look on his face.

  I wanted to say I was doing alright. That I was pulling up well. That it wasn’t effecting me. But I couldn’t seem to manage the words out. My eyes immediately filled with tears.

  “I don’t know if I can do this,” I admitted in a broken voice. “When he’s with me, he’s so genuine. Like he really loves me.”

  Christ, why the hell was I saying this to them? It wasn’t like they’d care, but I needed them to remind me why I was doing this. To reiterate what had been said to me so I really didn’t imagine the entire thing.

  “I know, I know,” he soothingly replied on a sigh, running his hand through his hair in resignation. “If I’d known this would happen, I’d have reached out sooner. I’m sorry, Claire. I’m sorry for all your pain. I feel like it’s my fault somehow. Maybe pulling out would be best.”

  “No, it wouldn’t,” the redhead retorted. She looked at me hard and said, “That man has been through countless women. So don’t stand there and think you’re special, Miss Landon.”

  “Stop it,” Hardman told her gruffly.

  “No,” she argued. “Tell her about the damn footage if she doesn’t believe me.”

  “What footage?” I asked.

  Hardman’s jaw ticked as he glared at her before he turned to me. “Marla and I found some footage for you of the night you were attacked. Costigan was a block away. CCTV footage captured him speaking to Joshua Malik before they parted ways three hours prior to the attack. So we’re getting that investigation going for you, even if you pull out.”

  “You can’t pull out!” Marla hissed, taking a step closer to me. Her hard face softened a tad when she saw the tears falling from my eyes. “We’ve already told you he’s got a big deal coming up. We don’t know when, but we’ve got insiders saying it’s coming soon. Now what he’s going to do is see a man, and we need to know the time and place.”

  “What goes on there?”

  “It’s just a business transaction, but it’s Ben’s men that do the pick-up. Now the problem is we won’t be able to link the pick-up with Costigan, so we need proof of this business deal.”

  “And how are you going to get that?”

  Marla turned to Hardman and motioned to the car. Hardman opened the door and took out a case. He opened it and showed me a classy men’s watch. I stared dumbfounded at the two.

  “What’s that going to do?” I asked.

  “It’s got a built in recording device,” Marla answered, pulling the watch out of the case. “You press the two o’clock button two times to start it, and it records for six hours. When you know he’s on his way, you press the button and you give us the time and place so we can intercept the money and arrest Costigan. By then we’ll have the interaction recorded as proof of intent, and the evidence will be the money.”

  I stood nervously, playing her words through in my head. “Can I give him the watch on Christmas day?”

  “No, we have reason to believe it’s going to happen very soon. You must do it as soon as possible. See him today. Make sure things are good, and keep an ear out because we’re inches to the finish line.”

  I rubbed my face and exhaled. “I want to see the footage. When this is all said and done, I want to see it.” I want to see it so I can put this whole mess behind me and never turn back again.

  I felt a small hand on my shoulder. She squeezed it gently and said, “Claire, you’re incredibly strong, and you can do this. We’ll show you whatever you want. We’re here for you. Okay?”

  I nodded, sniffing back the tears.

  They placed the watch case in my car and repeated their instructions a few more times before they got into their car and took off. I dragged myself into mine and sat in the empty parking lot for what seemed like hours.

  Their words numbed me.

  Footage. They had footage of him talking to…

  I slammed my hands against the steering wheel and screamed at the top of my lungs.

  Then I grabbed the watch case and stared down
at it with fire in my heart.

  I was going to ruin him.

  *****

  Feeling strangely at ease by the time I made it home, I found Emily on the porch, decorating the railing and door with green and red tinsel. Miles was helping out, chatting up a storm while she crept away from him every time he got too close.

  She looked relieved when she saw me. “Hey you!” she smiled.

  No sign of my previous breakdown, I smiled back. “Hey to you too. You’re doing Mom’s job really well. I wouldn’t have decorated.”

  “Well, we’re not all boring like you,” she said.

  Miles laughed… a little too hard. “Funny.”

  I watched her for a few minutes. “You know, I know I’ve been here for like ten years, but it’s still weird seeing Christmas in summer.”

  “That’s the only kind of Christmas I know,” she replied. “Maybe we should see a white Christmas next year or something.”

  “Yeah,” I passively said while thinking, if I’m alive by then.

  “I’ve always wanted to see a white Christmas,” muttered Miles. We didn’t acknowledge him.

  “Your Mom called, by the way,” said Emily. “Says you’ve dropped off the radar and is unimpressed with you.”

  I cringed. “Yeah, I’ll call her back now then. See you guys later.”

  Once in my room, I called her. After she finished scolding me, we made small chat before I broached her on a subject I’d been meaning to since hell decided to take a shit on my life.

  “I want to ask you something,” I said.

  “Go on then.”

  “If you could go back in time and you knew Dad had lied to you about everything before he got caught, would you have done something to him?”

  She paused, taking several seconds to answer. “Like what?”

  “I don’t know. Anything.”

  “I guess I would have just put him away sooner.”

  “Wouldn’t you want him to suffer more?”

  She chuckled wryly. “He’s suffering just fine behind bars. The crimes he did were despicable. He hurt a lot of people.”

  “And is he hurting enough behind bars, do you think?”

  “Well,” she sighed, “it’s not about him hurting, Claire, it’s about who he can’t hurt anymore.”

  I nodded, shutting my eyes in understanding. “Yeah. But what about you? Did that kind of revenge make you feel better in the end?”

  “No,” she answered honestly. “The happiness revenge offers is fleeting, but your emotions always catch up to you in the end. It broke me. But I had you, and I needed to remember to be strong and independent.”

  I reflected on that.

  “Claire,” she then said, “why do you ask?”

  “No reason,” I lied. “Anyway, how are things going between you and Kevin?”

  “Amazing. I’m finally in his good graces after I pulled back on him.”

  “That’s very good, Mom.” That made me so happy to hear.

  “And how about you and Ben? Is that man still as perfect as when I met him?”

  Not wanting there to be a pause big enough to make her question things, I steadfastly replied, “Oh, yeah. Definitely, Mom. He’s… amazing.”

  “That’s great. I’m so happy for you, Claire. I had a good feeling about that man. You hold on to him.”

  “Yeah.” I’d hold on to him and let go when he was high enough to break.

  When I got off the phone with her, I kicked about the house for a few hours. Then I had a quick shower and changed into a white summer dress. I put more make-up on than usual, enough to make my eyes pop out like glowing orbs. Then I carefully put the necklace Ben gifted me around my neck. After I felt and looked good, I pulled out some wrapping paper and messily wrapped the watch case. I placed it in my purse and headed back out.

  The sky darkened on my way back to Ben’s place. And while on the road, I pep-talked myself.

  “Fuck him,” I said bitterly. “Don’t you dare let him fool you. You have to do this right. You’re strong. You’re a strong woman and you can do this.”

  I can and I will.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  I trust you

  He had a guarded expression when he opened the door to me.

  I looked apologetically back at him. The only way this was going to work was by channelling all the good things I felt for him. Lying with the truth, right?

  “Can I come in?” I asked him, appearing unsure.

  He widened the door and I stepped in. He slammed it shut and I jumped at the force of it. He was still in a shit mood, his face twisting into a frown. I faced him and immediately dived into apology mode.

  “Ben, I’m sor –”

  “What the hell happened this morning, Claire?” he snapped.

  I shrugged. “I don’t really know.”

  “You don’t know? You can’t tell me what was going through your goddamn head when you started interrogating me?”

  “Maybe I’m PMS’ing?” I didn’t give him an opportunity to respond. “Look, I messed up. After your left, I was alone and had all these thoughts in my head. I felt so insecure and inadequate. You could be with anyone you want, and yet you choose me and…”

  He didn’t rescue me with reassurances. He just stood there, waiting for me to continue. I didn’t like his indifference. It worried me.

  Be. Honest.

  I sighed and said in a harder voice, “I was stupid. It was all my fault. I… I led myself to believe for a minute that I couldn’t trust you. That what we have isn’t real to you. That you never really gave me your heart. It destroyed me and I lashed out at you, and it was wrong.”

  The tension in his bones gradually gave out. He relaxed and exhaled long and slow. I watched that anger trickle away, replaced by warmth. He took my hand into his and ran his thumb over my knuckles. His other arm wrapped around me and brought me against his chest. I buried my face into him, suspending my current hate in order to live and breathe all of him in now. I hated the way my body responded to it.

  “I’m not going anywhere,” he told me. “I love you, I won’t deceive you, and I will catch you every time you fall. Because I trust you, and I know you’d do the same for me.”

  My being split into two. I couldn’t cope when in these moments I felt like he was telling the truth. But the voice inside my head pushed on through, telling me to focus.

  He pulled back and I felt his fingers around my neck. I looked down to see him running them over the opal necklace. “I see you opened your present,” he murmured.

  I smiled softly at him. “Yes. It’s beautiful.”

  “Beautiful on you. I walked up and down the jewellery aisle, looking for something that was perfect for you. I was around three other men doing the same thing, and we were all equally lost.”

  “Yeah, well, you knocked me away with this one.”

  “It sort of represents you. I saw the green shimmering in the light while it went blue in different angles. Like an opal, there are so many different sides to you, and they’re all equally beautiful.”

  I hardened my heart, not allowing his words to find their way in. “That’s really romantic, and that actually reminds me. I got you something too, as a thank you for this.”

  His eyes glowed and his brow shot up. “Is that right?”

  I nodded. “Sit on the couch.”

  I pulled the “gift” out of my purse when he sat down. Standing behind him, I took several deep breaths before I took a seat next to him and held the gift out. I stared at the terribly wrapped box and suppressed the panic that burst through me, making my skin break out in sweat.

  Completely oblivious of the havoc raging inside of me, he took it out of my grasp, and it was then I realized that the wheels were now in motion. He eyed me with a radiant smile on his face, remarking jokingly about my wrapping skills before he tore it apart. All the while I stared on with indecision, like this was all a mistake and I needed to take it back. It was getting harder to breathe, h
arder to think, and harder to keep still when my body was throbbing at this deception.

  He looked at the box, turning it over before he pulled off the lid and stared at the watch. He stared at it long and hard with a thoughtful expression.

  “Wow,” he finally muttered, “this must have been expensive, beauty.”

  It took me longer than normal to answer. When he glanced up at me, I shrugged. “I told you I have a bit of money from my inheritance.”

  He raked his eyes over my face, not sparing an inch as he studied me. Then he looked back down at the watch and pulled it out.

  “Help me put it on?” he asked.

  I took the watch from him and shakily set it over his wrist. Meanwhile, he continued to observe me closely. “You alright?”

  I nodded, unable to speak. By some miracle, I managed to strap it on, and when I did, I drew in a deep breath and relaxed into the couch. It felt unusually cold against my flesh. In fact, everything felt cold.

  “Thank you, Claire,” he then said, faraway in thought. “It’s the first time I’ve been gifted a watch. You really shouldn’t have.”

  Still unable to speak, I offered him a smile.

  “Did you have a hard time picking it out too?” He asked, taking my hand in his. “Was it hard for you as it was for me?”

  Avoiding his eyes, I cleared my throat and said, “No. It was my first and only choice.”

  “Lucky you.”

  I looked down at the hand he took with mine and stared at the watch. I felt sick.

  “I’m going to the bathroom for a second,” I told him a short while later. I didn’t wait for a response. I stood up and hurried away from him.

  I locked myself away in the bathroom gripped the basin with each hand. This was so much harder than it was supposed to be. After everything I’d been told I shouldn’t have been feeling anything for him. Yet watching him wear that watch had split me open. I felt weak and conflicted, and I was still on the verge of rushing back out there and tearing it off.

  I took deep breaths, trying to calm myself down. Minutes passed and soon he would be questioning my disappearance. I stood up straight and stared at the mirror. I didn’t like the person staring back at me. Her eyes looked dead, and her confidence had disappeared.