Ten Seconds of Crazy

by Randileigh Kennedy

  She smiled and nodded. “Grab yourself a bite and I’ll open up that shed over there to see what we’ve got to work with.”

  I quickly ate a piece of quiche, noting what a good cook Darla was. I met up with her by the old wooden shed where she had an assortment of tools all laid out.

  “What do you have in mind?” she asked, studying me for a reply.

  “That entrance needs some work,” I answered. “There are so many weed up there, and those flower boxes are completely overgrown. You can barely see the fence posts. I thought it might be nice to fix that all up as a thank you to Uncle Buck for letting me stay. And especially now with his cast, poor guy, I think it would be a nice gesture. I’d love some company if you’re up for it.”

  “I would love to,” she said sincerely. We made a quick list of things we needed and laid out our plan. The shed seemed to have all of the tools we required, but we definitely still needed some potting soil and a whole bunch of flowers. Darla knew a lot about different types of flora so she went to the store while I stayed back and started on the weeding.

  Within an hour, Darla was back from town with everything we needed and I had made good headway with the weeds. Despite being a petite woman, Darla was a machine at getting the rest of the weeds pulled up.

  We made some small talk as we worked, but didn’t get into anything too personal. She and Kent were college sweethearts, and I loved hearing about how they met and fell in love. She also talked a lot about their family, and I couldn’t help but feel jealous. It was truly heartbreaking that such a close-knit family could be turned upside down after just one phone call.

  Within two hours, all the weeds were pulled and it made a drastic difference. We spent another hour pouring the soil and planting flowers in the flower boxes hung by the fence posts at the entrance. I even used a ladder to clean off the sign that hung over the ranch’s entrance, and it looked far more radiant than when I first saw it just the day before. The pops of colors looked dramatic against the green corn fields in the distance, and the entire entrance looked like it belonged to another ranch.

  We marveled at our hard work. It was amazing how some TLC and a few hours could change something so drastically. We eventually made our way back down the driveway towards the house.

  “I really do want to thank you Cassidy,” Darla said sincerely. “You’ve fixed him. I didn’t think that Reid would ever be the same again after losing Preston. And maybe in some ways he’s not. But that joy on his face, that I recognize. I thought time would bring it back, but I think he really just needed something else to love about the world. He just needed someone else to care about to help him get through it. I know that doesn’t replace a hole like that, but it sure makes that hole more bearable. And now you’ve done that for me too. Now my heart only breaks for one boy instead of two.”

  A slow tear slid down her face and she hugged me.

  Words escaped me in that moment. It was such a genuine, real embrace, and I was so happy to feel connected to Reid’s family in some small way - especially after being on this journey with him, chasing after the youth he and Preston shared together.

  “The guys should be coming back soon. Let’s go get cleaned up,” Darla said with a comforting smile.

  As I headed back to the guesthouse, I remembered I needed to charge my cell phone. I failed to remember my charger as I hurriedly left my apartment before getting into Reid’s car after quitting the diner. I assumed he’d brought a charger with him.

  I grabbed the keys to his car, unlocking the trunk. I didn’t want to rummage through his bags, but I didn’t see any cords laying out with the blankets or other random items in there.

  I shut the trunk, moving to the front of the car to check the glove box. Hopefully he at least had some kind of car charger I could use.

  I opened up the plastic glove box door, noting a small black cinched bag. I put my hand on it to see what it was, quickly pulling my arm away as I felt the hard metal.

  Why would Reid have a gun in his glove box?

  There were a few papers in there as well; his car registration, insurance cards, and an envelope folded in half.

  I probably should’ve walked away, minding my own business. That would’ve been the sensible thing to do. But instead I opened the envelope, my feelings of shame being trumped by curiosity.

  The folded up piece of paper inside the envelope looked like the scavenger hunt Reid had referenced earlier. The handwriting on it matched Preston’s letters.

  Reid -

  We have yet to fail at one of these - make me proud, brother. Here’s your scavenger hunt for the road trip:

  - Find a lost treasure

  - Eat a ghost pepper

  - Take a picture of the prettiest girl you’ve ever seen

  - Listen to the entire Beatles Collection I gave you

  - Change out one of the pictures in Uncle Buck’s house with a swimsuit model photo

  - Pick up a lost soul and change their life

  - Carve our initials into a tree (no hearts man - that’s messed up)

  - Do something brave

  - Save an animal

  - Get a tattoo

  ~ Preston

  I immediately noticed a few of the items already had a checkmark next to them on the paper. Pick up a lost soul and change their life. My eyes fixated on the checkmark next to that line.

  I was fuming. Really? I was a pathetic scavenger hunt item?

  My stomach instantly turned. Maybe things had changed between us from when we first met - I honestly believed that. But this whole thing started between us just because I was part of some stupid list his brother made? One of the ‘quests’ he had to complete? It angered me to think about all of this, him asking me to join him - all because it was part of some ridiculous checklist.

  So glad I could be something for you to cross off your list. My cheeks felt flush and I felt so foolish.

  I shoved the list back into the envelope and jammed it into the glove box. I was not a lost soul - that sounded pathetic, like I needed saving. Like he chose me because something was ‘missing’ - like I looked helpless.

  I made my way back to the guesthouse, turning on the shower. As I waited for the water to warm up, I begged my phone battery to last long enough for me to locate the nearest bus station. I suddenly felt unwelcome, like I was just a part of whatever closure Reid was hoping to find by finishing out this trip. After all, what was I really planning to do once we got to Michigan? Shack up with Reid and his Grandpa at their cottage? That sounded quaint, I thought to myself sarcastically.

  I located a bus stop about eight miles from Uncle Buck’s house. The schedule had me back in Mountain Ridge by early tomorrow morning. That seemed doable.

  I climbed into the shower, letting the steam fill my lungs. I wished I could stop them, but slow tears started streaming down my face. Somehow those tears just turned into epic sobs, as if I was just dumped by my longtime boyfriend. Somehow the reality of this felt worse, because instead of feeling loved and then heartbroken, I felt used and deceived. I felt ridiculous and stupid. Embarrassed and empty.

  What if Darla or Uncle Buck knew about the scavenger hunt list? I assume he at least showed it to his mom when he grabbed the letters for her to read. They would know I was simply a line crossed off. It was mortifying.

  I composed myself and engulfed my skin in the hot water, as if I could wash off the sting of embarrassment. I knew deep down this was nothing like the humiliation of prom night - the three minutes of my epic downward spiral - but it still enraged me. My throat felt tight and I so badly wanted to just disappear. My mom did it enough times. Surely I was genetically superior enough as part of her bloodline to master that skill as well.

  I shut off the water and grabbed a towel off the countertop.

  “Cassidy?” Reid called from the other side of the door.

  “Yeah, give me just a minute,” I replied, trying to sound confident. “I’m just getting out of the shower.”

&nb
sp; “I think Uncle Buck wants to open-mouth kiss you for what you did to his entryway,” he responded, leaning in close to the bathroom door.

  My reflection in the mirror revealed my puffy eyes from crying in the shower. I quickly dabbed some concealer around them, trying to mask my breakdown. I didn’t want to be angry at him for this. After all, this entire thing, the whole trip, was really about his brother. All of this was for Preston. Ultimately I couldn’t hate him for using me to accomplish that. Their bond was far deeper than ours ever could be. I didn’t feel any better about the whole thing, but I knew I wanted to leave gracefully. He didn’t need any more hurt in his life. But neither did I. I knew I needed a believable exit plan. An excuse, some lie… That was the only way I could save us both from this web we were trapped in.

  I tied up my wet hair and slipped on the only other cotton sundress I brought with me. I slowly opened the door, not surprised to find him still standing there. Of course he had a big sexy grin on his face, which I tried hard to look away from.

  “Something came up this morning,” I said softly. “I think we should talk.”

  “Okay,” he responded with an uneasy tone. “Is everything okay? You’re worrying me.”

  “I got a call this morning from the university in Mountain Ridge,” I lied. “I got a pretty sizeable scholarship for the fall. I have to fill out a bunch of paperwork so they can process everything.” I glanced up at him to gauge his reaction. I wasn’t sure if I was happy or disappointed that he looked sad by my omission. “There’s a bus that leaves in an hour. I was hoping maybe Uncle Buck could run me into town.”

  “You have to go back? Now?” he asked with a waiver in his voice.

  “We knew this would happen eventually,” I replied, still trying to maintain my composure. “What am I supposed to do, live in your car?” I tried smiling to keep the mood light, but it felt as fake as it probably looked. Ultimately I was just hoping not to completely break down in front of him.

  “It’s still June,” he said with a shrug. “I mean I don’t know what I expected, but I thought we at least had a few weeks. Maybe the whole summer.”

  “Well I don’t want to hold anything up with the paperwork,” I continued to lie. “I need the scholarship, so I can’t really pass this up. It might be easier now anyway. Before we get in over our heads,” I said with a slight crack in my voice.

  “I’m already in over my head, Cass,” he said sincerely, grabbing my hand. “You’re the most amazing girl. I just… I want to at least spend the summer with you.”

  He sounded so sincere as he spoke, but I just couldn’t shake the image of the checkmark on his list. I wondered if he would have to uncheck it if I walked away. What if he didn’t actually save this lost soul? What then? Maybe saving me now was worth it, so he wouldn’t have to find some other crazy girl to get in his car.

  “I really think it would be better if I left now. Maybe you’ll find some other lost soul to pick up on the way,” I said directly.

  He narrowed his eyes at me. “I didn’t ask you to come with me because you looked lost.”

  “Right,” I responded quietly. “Perhaps there was another reason.”

  “I wanted you to come with me because you looked like an adventure I so badly wanted to have.”

  “Well, it’s been had,” I said with a cruel, hurtful tone. “Consider it crossed off the list.”

  “What does that mean?” he asked, looking genuinely confused.

  I shoved my things into my bag, hoping this conversation would end before it broke me. All of my emotion felt trapped in my throat.

  “I’m going to see if Phil can drive me into town,” I said, choking back any feelings I had for this perfectly handsome man standing in front of me. My mom did it over and over. How hard could this be?

  “I’ll drive you wherever you want to go, Cassidy. I’ll even take you back to Mountain Ridge if that’s what you really want. But talk to me. Please,” he pleaded. “What’s really going on?”

  “I’m not lost, Reid,” I said as a small tear slid down my cheek. He wrapped his arms around me and gently slid a finger across my face, wiping away the tear. “I’m not lost,” I whispered again, as I felt the warmth of his body around me.

  “I know that, Cass,” he said softly into my ear. “But I will be if you walk away from me now.”

  “I put the scavenger hunt rules back in your glove box. I hope you finish everything you were intending to do. For Preston’s sake,” I said as another tear slowly fell.

  “This is about the scavenger hunt?” he responded, brushing a piece of hair back from my face. “I still don’t understand what happened.”

  “I saw your checkmark next to the line ‘pick up a lost soul and change their life.’ I’m glad I could help the mission,” I said dryly. So much for leaving gracefully.

  “Dammit,” he said taking an awkward step back. “I didn’t want to talk about that.”

  “Well now you don’t have to,” I replied grabbing my bag.

  “That’s not what I meant, Cass. That checkmark has nothing to do with you.” He nervously put his hands in his pockets and looked towards the ground, shaking his head. “You’re not the first person I picked up.”

  CHAPTER 12

  “Well that makes this even easier,” I stated, trying to walk towards the front door.

  “It’s not what you think,” he replied, grabbing my hand again.

  “What, you really did pick up an escort in Nevada?” I said with a sarcastic smirk.

  “No,” he said with a slight laugh. “I think it was worse. It cost me a thousand bucks. And my pride.” He shot me an embarrassed smile and took the bag off my shoulder.

  “So she was expensive and experienced,” I said dryly.

  “No, it was a guy,” he replied with a slight laugh. “And I’m pretty sure the money bought him a generous supply of meth. Which means instead of helping the poor kid, I probably contributed to his future overdose.”

  A small smile escaped my lips as Reid stared at me, waiting for my reaction.

  “Why didn’t you tell me about any of that?” I asked, studying his face.

  “Because it’s completely embarrassing,” he replied, putting up his arms in a very animated gesture. “Would that have been a good pick up line for you? ‘Hey, I was just robbed after trusting an eighteen year old drug addict - but really, I swear I’m a good judge of character.’ Would that omission make a girl like you jump right into my car?” He smiled at me with a huge grin, and it was impossible to even be mad at him.

  “So you’re telling me right after you got robbed of a thousand dollars, you went out and picked up another stranger?” I asked incredulously, pointing at myself. “What made you think I wouldn’t do the same thing? You’d think that experience would’ve made you put your guard up.”

  “Probably awhile ago I would have,” he admitted. “But I thought about Preston in that moment. My brother would help anybody. That poor guy could’ve straight up asked my brother for a thousand bucks and if he had it, he probably would’ve just given it to him. Preston would do that kind of thing for someone he didn’t even know if he truly believed it would help them. Someone who probably didn’t even deserve it. And there I was just giving a guy a ride and I got completely burned. But I guess Preston taught me to try and see the upside of things. I was supposed to change a stranger’s life. That wasn’t what I intended to happen, but I guess it still changed his situation. Even if it was only temporary. Plus, he left something in my car before he took off.”

  “What do you mean?” I asked curiously.

  “I found a gun under the seat. It must’ve fallen out of his pants or something, I had no idea he had that on him. I’m glad I’m telling you about that before you found it in the car on your own and freaked out,” he admitted.

  “Too late,” I replied with a smirk. “I found that too.”

  “So maybe I changed his life in some other way,” he said proudly. “I doubt that gun was going
to be used for anything good. So maybe me picking him up, I don’t know, maybe that chance encounter is keeping him from another bad decision. Even accidentally. It’s weird how lives intersect like that, right? Maybe that one thing made a difference somehow.”

  Reid continued staring at me, probably wondering if I was still intent on leaving.

  “Look, this will probably sound stupid to you. But I feel like losing Preston has changed me, not in some horrible way like you’d expect. Like my mother thinks. But I just feel… awakened. Most things in life people worry about - they’re just things. Not long ago, if that situation happened to me, I would’ve been irate. I would’ve been mad and vengeful and spiteful over that stupid money. But if there’s one thing I learned from my brother, it’s that stuff doesn’t matter. People matter. And I know that sounds totally cliché, but I finally feel that now.”

  “So you would’ve tried saving that hitchhiker all over again?” I mused.

  “Yes, probably. I wish everyone had faith in people like that. Even when you get burned. I would rather trust you and learn about you and experience all of this with you with no regard for what you may do to me because this is what matters. Even if you steal my last five hundred dollars. Or disappear from my life as soon as the trip is over. Or even if you leave me completely destroyed and broken at some point. The rest of it doesn’t matter. Because I know without a doubt in my mind that you’re worth it. However many days or weeks or seconds we have together. Even if you still want to walk out on this, you getting in my car that day will forever be something we got right. That has to be true.”

  I walked towards Reid and he wrapped his arms around my waist. He kissed me, ever so gently, and I couldn’t imagine walking away from him. I finally realized I never had to doubt his sincerity. It was true we hadn’t known each other long. There were so many things we didn’t know about each other, and of course that would simply take time. But I knew with certainty in this moment that he was one of the most genuine people I knew.