Ten Seconds of Crazy

by Randileigh Kennedy

  “Why is the picture so sad?” I wondered aloud. The couple looked to be easily in their eighties, and although they stood close to each other, neither one had a smile on their face. It was actually kind of a depressing picture.

  “I think it’s amazing,” he said, still staring at the old photo. “I have an idea. Stand right here,” he explained, positioning me a few feet back in front of the barn.

  “What are we doing?” I asked, wondering what he was up to.

  “I don’t know, it’s kind of ironic, right? These really old people, looking miserable in front of a brand new beautiful barn - and here we are, young and happy standing in front of decay and destruction. It’s like the world is backwards,” he said quietly, setting up his phone on the hood of the car. He set the self-timer and then ran back to stand next to me. He slid an arm around my waist and I smiled, more from his touch than from being photographed.

  “Just one more, in case that one didn’t turn out,” he said, quickly running back to the phone to reset it. He didn’t even look at the picture. Once the timer was on, he ran back towards me. Seconds before the picture snapped, he leaned in and kissed me.

  “That one’s not going to turn out,” I said softly, pulling my lips slowly away from his.

  “I don’t even care,” he replied with a smirk, hungrily kissing me back. He gently moved us closer to the car, his arms still wrapped firmly around me. Once we made it near the driver’s side, he reached down quickly into the car and turned on the radio. It was set on a country station, and a sweet slow love song replaced the silence around us. He wrapped his arm back around my waist and pulled me in close, slowly swaying our bodies together.

  The sun sank lower in the distance and the air around us was perfectly still. I could feel his heartbeat through his shirt as we slowly moved to the music with our bodies pressed together.

  “Do you think those old people in the picture ever danced together in front of the barn?” I mused softly, resting my head on Reid’s firm chest.

  “No, otherwise they would’ve been smiling,” he replied sweetly. “Anybody experiencing this should be the happiest people in the world.”

  I smiled as he said it, taking in the way he smelled like a soft cologne. The way his muscles flexed as he held me sent shivers through my body despite the warm summer air.

  “I might be the happiest person in the world right now,” I stated quietly. It was more likely meant to be a thought to myself, but I wasn’t bothered by such honestly escaping my lips. I had never been so comfortable wrapped up in someone in my entire life.

  The sun finally slipped below the horizon and I stared up at the starlit sky. There was something about this scene - two people dancing in the open air next to a barn surrounded by corn fields. We were alone and uninterrupted and it felt like the entire world was a secret only we knew.

  Glowing fireflies whirled around us and this moment felt exactly like what I wished every summer night could be. It felt surreal and romantic and safe. It was whimsical and innocent and electric all at the same time. Reid tenderly kissed me and my whole body tingled. His gentleness made me crazy - it was perfect and sweet, but it made me so badly want more. I didn’t want his arms to let me go. I didn’t want his lips to stop pressing against my skin. I didn’t want our bodies to ever have to separate.

  “I can’t imagine ever going back to Nevada,” I said quietly.

  An owl cooed in the distance.

  He whispered softly into my ear. “So don’t.”

  CHAPTER 14

  The early morning sun made its way through the space between the soft white curtains. I looked around the guestroom, disappointed to see that Reid’s spot in the bed was empty. I smiled, thinking back to last night - the way his soft touch grazed my bare skin - the way he held me like ever letting go was utterly impossible.

  The door to the guesthouse opened and closed, followed by the opening of the bedroom door. Reid carried a small wooden tray with plates of food and fresh flowers. There was a small lit candle in the center of one of the plates.

  “These pancakes may not be diner quality, but it’s Uncle Buck’s secret recipe. Which means that I pulled them out of a box in the freezer,” Reid said smiling, setting down the tray on top of the bed sheets. He swiftly kissed me and climbed in next to me. “Happy Birthday.”

  “How did you know today was the day?” I asked curiously. I didn’t mention it leading up to this day. Birthdays always came with weird expectations, and I hated that. Most of my past birthdays weren’t noteworthy anyway. I didn’t expect this one to be any different. It was just another day to me.

  “You told me that night on the grass at the rib festival,” he said casually, as if it was so obvious.

  “And you remembered from that night? Even though I never mentioned it again?”

  “Of course,” he said nonchalantly. “It’s an important day. Birthdays should never be overlooked.”

  I thought back to the three, yes three times my own mother even forgot my birthday - and I lived in the same house with her.

  “This is amazing,” I gushed, continually overwhelmed by his thoughtfulness.

  “So wheels up in an hour?” he asked, raising a brow. “We have a long driving day. Maybe not the perfect birthday plan, but I thought we could make up some time.”

  “Sounds good to me,” I replied, blowing out the candle. I took a bite of the pancakes, surprised to find they tasted better than I expected. “Although I feel like I could stay here forever. Nebraska has quickly become one of my favorite places.” He fed me a bite of food, further confirming my thoughts.

  “Then this won’t be the last time we eat pancakes in Uncle Buck’s bed,” he replied playfully. “Next summer. We’ll come back. For your birthday.”

  I loved the idea of making future plans with him. I wished so bad that life could just be one simple idea. Like two people could just sink away with the summer sun and live some kind of movie-ending happily-ever-after. As if that ever really happened. If there’s one thing I learned from my mom, it was that no matter how hard you chased down that ideal, it just didn’t exist - no matter how many ‘kind-of-happy-for-awhiles’ you got.

  He kissed me again reassuringly this time, as if he was reading my uncertain mind. “Don’t over think it. Just tell me we’ll be in Nebraska again someday eating pancakes.”

  “I will eat pancakes with you anywhere,” I replied, kissing him back sweetly.

  We finished our food, cleaned up and showered, and packed up our bags. Reid loaded our stuff up in the trunk of his car and I somberly said goodbye to Uncle Buck.

  “I’m really going to miss this place,” I said honestly, giving him a big hug. “Sorry about your elbow.”

  “Ah, I’ve had worse,” Uncle Buck replied dismissively, squeezing me tight with his other arm. “Besides, the looks on your faces - that was worth it. Preston would’ve loved every second of that.”

  I smiled, so happy to have met Reid’s family. I never realized how gypped I was to not have any close relatives growing up. I so badly wished I had my own Uncle Buck.

  “Come here boy, we need to have a talk,” Uncle Buck said towards Reid as he released me from our hug. “You are not welcome back her unless this girl is with you, do you understand?” He wrapped Reid up in a tight one-armed hug as well.

  “Yes sir. That’s my plan,” Reid said warmly, embracing him back. Uncle Buck winked at me and my heart felt full in that moment.

  As we left the house, my eye caught a glimpse of a photo frame on the mantle in the living room. There were three separate pictures in the frame - one of Uncle Buck playing golf, one that appeared to be Reid’s parents at some party, and one photo right in the middle of Christy Brinkley. I couldn’t help but snicker as I saw it.

  Reid and I exited the beautiful white farm house and climbed in the car, convertible top down. We waived at Uncle Buck one more time as we pulled out of his driveway. I took in one last look of the ranch - the porch swing, the cow pasture,
and the corn fields - and hoped with everything I had this wouldn’t be my last sight of it.

  Reid drove us down the country roads and we eventually made our way back to Interstate 80. In his usual fashion, Reid played wonderful, upbeat road trip music and we sang loud as the wind whipped over us. I was beginning to learn most of his favorite songs and I loved every minute of our animated ride together.

  We stopped for lunch at a small pizza joint right off the highway and continued right back on our journey. Reid explained our next couple stops to me and I looked forward to whatever adventures we would have next.

  Long drives used to be a time of reflection for me, where I could get lost in my thoughts and sort out my life. So many times I sat in the passenger seat of my mom’s car, imaging what my new life would be like when we arrived at our next destination. I imagined what my new school would look like - what our new apartment would look like - who my new temporary friends would be. The problem with all that was how fleeting it all was. In just a matter of months, a year tops, I was in the passenger seat of her car again, imagining yet another fresh start to a life where endings and beginnings didn’t differentiate much.

  This obviously felt different to me - it wasn’t my mom’s car and Reid wasn’t anything like that crazy woman. I mean yeah, he was fun, maybe a little reckless - but he wasn’t over-promising and facetiously optimistic that every destination would work out perfectly. Most importantly, I didn’t feel empty and mad in his passenger seat like I did all those times before with my mom. This passenger seat actually made me wish it was permanently attached to my derrière.

  “Can I ask you a question?” Reid asked curiously, turning down the music as we continued down the highway.

  “Of course. I have nowhere to go,” I teased, throwing up my hands.

  “You’ve never mentioned your dad,” he said thoughtfully. “I assume that’s a sensitive subject, but I just wondered…” His voice trailed off, probably not knowing how to tactfully ask that any other way. We had just spent time with his family, so I guess it made sense to me as to why it was on his mind.

  “I honestly don’t have a single story to tell,” I replied, gazing out the passenger side of the car.

  “That bad, huh?” he said sympathetically. He narrowed his eyes at me, as if trying to gauge whether or not I wanted to keep this conversation going by offering up any more information.

  “I never met him,” I continued, figuring it was too late by now to hold anything back. I was more comfortable around Reid than anyone else I’d ever known. He was as good a person as any to talk about this with. “I’m not sure my mom even knows who got her pregnant.”

  I could tell by the look on Reid’s face that he didn’t expect that type of a response.

  “She was nineteen when she got pregnant with me,” I further explained. “She was a Go-Go dancer at some club in Las Vegas. She said she was making tons of money and was ‘living the dream’ - yeah, her words. She likes to tell me that my father was ‘likely’ one of the more successful men she spent time with. Possibly even a D-list celebrity of sorts. Maybe a popular nineties rock star - she actually threw that out once.”

  “She really has no idea?” he asked seriously, surprised by that omission.

  “Nah, but that’s my mom for you,” I said dryly. “It’s like she can’t admit that maybe, just maybe, my father was a boring nerd of a businessman from Ohio. I mean maybe he was someone spectacular. According to her that’s possible. But as I got older, I learned that the not knowing part was the magic to her. Like by not knowing, there’s a chance that I’m half-spectacular too. It doesn’t even make sense,” I added, shaking my head.

  “Do you think she knows anything? She must’ve at least narrowed it down, right?” he probed, still not fully believing me.

  “Apparently my mom was quite the Go-Go dancer,” I remarked with an exaggerated hand gesture. “She couldn’t make a short list if she tried. She was already four months along by the time she even found out. And she only found out because she didn’t make the weigh-in for her hot-shorts uniform.”

  “If you had the ability to find out who he was, would you want to know?” he asked curiously.

  “No,” I answered honestly. “It wouldn’t change anything. He never knew it happened in the first place, so it’s not like I’m looking for someone to blame. I already am who I am, you know? So maybe he was a great guy, or someone important, or maybe he’s a deadbeat still screwing twenty year old Go-Go dancers. Either way, it doesn’t change anything.”

  “That’s messed up,” he said quietly. “The guy never even had a chance to know.”

  “It’s probably for the better,” I replied. “My mom would’ve messed that up anyway. So maybe she did something right there. Who knows? Maybe there is magic in not knowing. Maybe she had that right.”

  Reid shot me a sympathetic glance and put his hand on my leg. “Well you turned out to be spectacular. So you’re right. At the end of the day it doesn’t matter.”

  “My mom always told me I was born with glitter in my veins,” I mused. “She said that girls born in Las Vegas have magic coursing through them, and it doesn’t matter where they came from or who they are - they are destined for greatness. It seems I’m right on track,” I stated sarcastically. I stared out at the passing fields, reminded of just how disheveled my life really was at the moment. The glitter in my bloodstream felt more like honey, slowing me down. My mom’s words always made me feel magical and empowered as a little girl, but that had long worn off by now. The reality of adulthood only proved the opposite - I was as close to ordinary as possible.

  “We’re making a pit stop here,” Reid interjected, breaking up my thoughts.

  “What are we going to do?” I asked nervously, surprised we were breaking away from our original plan.

  “Well, it’s your birthday. So we have to do something big. Something spectacular,” he said with a huge grin on his face. His light blue-grey eyes sparkled and the handsome dimple from his smile pulled me in. The joy on his face about anything, even small stupid things, had a way of completing melting me.

  We pulled off the highway somewhere near the border of Iowa. The town looked decent-sized, and I wondered what Reid had planned. We made our way to a small gas station and he filled up the tank, looking deep in thought.

  “What are you thinking?” I said aloud, trying to read his face.

  “You think you’re ordinary, but you’re far from it. What makes us ordinary people? What’s stopping us from actually being better than that?” Reid was very animated as he spoke, and I could tell his brain was overflowing as he tried to gather his thoughts.

  “Do you have plans for us to cure cancer this afternoon?” I teased.

  “No, but why can’t we still do something epic? Maybe people just ‘choose’ ordinary,” he continued, putting his hands on the edge of the car, leaning in towards me as he continued to wait for the gas to fill. “But that’s boring, right? So instead of an ordinary day, let’s choose to be spectacular.”

  “Oh no, I feel the ‘crazy’ speech coming on,” I replied with a laugh.

  “I’m serious. Let’s do it. Let’s choose to be extraordinary today. Right now,” he said confidently.

  “I have no idea what you’re getting at, but I’ll do it. Let’s be spectacular,” I responded, somewhat mockingly, but with endearing intentions. I had no doubt this man could talk me into anything, crazy or not. “I don’t even need ten seconds to decide,” I responded, shaking my head. “I’m in.”

  CHAPTER 15

  “So what’s the idea?” I questioned as Reid entered something into his phone. He pulled out of the gas station and began driving down some side streets, clearly with an idea in mind.

  “How much money do we have?” he asked mainly to himself, doing some math in his head. “I’m still a little pissed I was viciously mugged out of a thousand bucks by a violent criminal.”

  “A meth addict robbed your glove box of an envelope o
f cash,” I replied with a laugh. “Not exactly the picture you’re painting.”

  “It makes me feel better about the situation if there’s perceived added danger,” he teased back. “Let’s just go with that.”

  “Fair enough,” I responded. “But either way that money is gone. I only have a couple hundred bucks on me.”

  “We’ll still need money for gas, a few more hotels, food…” he said aloud, still thinking this through. “We could probably drop the projected budget a bit. You know, trim some corners. Although I imagine we won’t find any youth hostels in Iowa. How do you feel about squatting in abandoned homes to cut our accommodation costs?”

  My eyes widened and he laughed, letting me know he was definitely kidding about that.

  “So let’s keep your money for the rest of our incidentals, and I’ll reimburse you when we get to Michigan,” he explained.

  “You don’t have to reimburse me for anything,” I said honestly. “This trip has been fun. I don’t mind spending the rest of my money to get us there. It’s totally worth it.” I probably should’ve been thinking about my fall semester instead, but my heart was far away from those thoughts of school. I hated that I lied to him about getting a big scholarship. The real truth was I would probably have to drop a few of the classes I wanted to take because I just couldn’t pay for it. Of course that made it completely irresponsible of me to quit my job and head out joyriding with a handsome stranger… But this stranger truly had me convinced that I’d made the better choice.

  “So I have about five hundred bucks we can use,” he continued. “Let’s do something big with it. I don’t care if we spend all of it, as long as we do something fun and memorable.”

  “So what do you have in mind?” I asked curiously. “Put it all on red at one of the riverboat casinos?” I teased. I had to admit, that would actually be pretty fun. But it would also be irresponsible and impulsive.