Gino’s Arranged Bride

by Lucy Gordon

  ‘Which one is Tess?’ Claudia wanted to know.

  ‘You know, the little sexpot with red hair, always sashaying around the place putting all the goods on display.’ Sadie made an exaggerated figure eight with her hands. ‘They say she’s a proper little raver. Isn’t that right, Gino?’

  But Gino was on his guard by now, and although he winked knowingly, all he said was, ‘Ladies, my lips are sealed.’

  They would have been astonished to learn the truth. In fact, they would not have believed it. Tess had a voluptuous figure and big blue eyes, but behind those eyes was a steely efficiency, as Gino had discovered on the day she explained exactly what she wanted of him.

  ‘I’m gonna kill that rat, Perry,’ she’d muttered, handing Gino his tea one morning.

  ‘I thought you were crazy about him.’

  ‘I am, but I’m gonna kill him. His roving eye has roved too far this time. Quick, he’s coming. Smile at me.’

  Slipping into his allotted role, Gino gave her an infatuated smile right under Perry’s nose. Thereafter they played out the farce whenever necessary and so far it had kept Perry almost, if not entirely, faithful.

  They would leave work together, or meet for a drink in the evening. There was a decent pub near work, but it was an ugly, beery place, a dump.

  ‘Let’s go to The Running Sheep,’ Gino suggested. ‘That’ll teach Perry you’re worth something better than this place.’

  Heads turned in their direction as they entered. Tess’s blatant charms made a stunning impact, and Gino had a feeling as if the old days had returned. He’d been the man who could get any girl, who played the field as if life contained nothing better. Which had been true, once.

  He saw Tess seated and approached Laura at the bar.

  ‘A bottle of champagne, please.’

  She glanced at his companion. ‘Let me guess. It’s Maisie-or Jill, or Rose, or Lily-’

  ‘Cut it out,’ he said, grinning. ‘That’s Tess.’

  ‘The sexpot! Wow! Yes, I can see that you’ve got something to celebrate.’

  He ground his teeth. ‘Will you just get me some champagne, please?’

  ‘Yes, sir!’

  ‘To think I used to wish I had a sister! I didn’t know how lucky I was.’

  She handed him the bottle and two champagne glasses. ‘Not all women are as bossy as me.’

  ‘Now there’s something to be thankful for. How much?’

  She told him.

  ‘Don’t you have anything cheaper?’ he asked plaintively.

  ‘You skinflint. I’ve a good mind to warn her what you’re really like.’

  ‘She wouldn’t believe you,’ he assured her. ‘Nobody would.’

  ‘Oh, get out of here.’

  Laughing, he offered her the money, then realised that he’d lost her attention. ‘Laura?’

  She quickly looked away from the door, back to him. ‘Sorry. Oh yes, the money.’

  Even as she took it her eyes were fixed on someone passing behind him.

  ‘Hi, Steve,’ she said, smiling. ‘Be with you in a minute.’

  ‘I can wait if it’s for you,’ he replied.

  It was him, taking his seat at the bar and waiting for Laura with an easy assurance that Gino found obscurely offensive.

  Tess eyed the champagne with glee. ‘If Perry could only see me now! He asked me out tonight. I said no thanks, I had other plans. He said, “What other plans?” and I said, “Never you mind.” I wonder if that was the right way to play it. What do you think, Gino? Gino?’

  ‘Sorry,’ he said hastily.

  ‘Why are you staring at the barmaid?’

  ‘I was wondering if she gave me the right change. Never mind. You were saying about Perry.’

  ‘Did I do the right thing?’

  ‘Absolutely.’

  He had no idea what she was talking about. The man Laura had called Steve was accepting his drink, indicating for her to have one too. They looked like people who knew each other well.

  ‘I want to make him jealous,’ Tess mused, ‘but not so jealous that I’ll lose him.’

  ‘It’s a difficult decision,’ Gino agreed mechanically.

  They were laughing, heads together over the bar. Gino forced himself to look away.

  ‘Do you really want to keep him?’ he asked Tess for something to say. ‘If he isn’t faithful now, he isn’t going to improve.’

  ‘Well, all men fool around, don’t they?’ she said gloomily. ‘That bloke at the bar is trying to fool around with the barmaid.’

  ‘Is that what he’s trying to do?’ Gino murmured.

  ‘Yes, just watch him gazing into her eyes-’

  ‘I am.’

  ‘He’s probably got a wife somewhere.’

  ‘Well, it’s their business,’ Gino said in a voice that was slightly tense. ‘I’m sure she can take care of herself. Let’s not watch them.’

  As she had promised Gino, Laura hadn’t spoken to Nikki about her father, and the child’s insistence that he was dead. Nor had Nikki mentioned it again, and the subject seemed to be safely over.

  They were coming up to the little girl’s ninth birthday.

  ‘It’s a big milestone,’ Gino told her gravely.

  ‘No, ten is a big milestone,’ she said, ‘because it’s double figures.’

  ‘But nine is the last one before that,’ Gino explained. ‘You’ll be in double figures the rest of your life-unless you live to be a hundred, when you’ll go into triple figures.’

  Nikki giggled.

  ‘So, this is your last year in single figures, and we must mark the occasion properly.’

  Satisfied with this explanation Nikki went off to tell Bert and Fred all about it. Laura shook her head and said admiringly, ‘How do you always manage to say the right thing to her?’

  He gave a comical shrug. ‘My brother Rinaldo would say it came from having the mind of a child myself. He’s probably right.’

  His own gift to Nikki was a lavishly illustrated book about Italy, with text in both Italian and English.

  ‘She’ll love this,’ Laura said, looking through it with delight. They were talking late at night, as they often did.

  ‘What are you giving her?’

  ‘A new dress, and some shoes I know she wants. And look at this.’

  Laura darted into the next room and returned with a bag from which she took a book about horses, and a birthday card.

  ‘I’m going to give her this,’ she said, ‘from Jack.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘I’ll sign it “from Daddy”. Then she’ll feel that he still remembers her, and she’ll be able to let go of this fantasy about him being dead.’

  Gino clutched his head. ‘No, Laura, please no, you mustn’t do this.’

  ‘But it’s what she needs.’

  ‘It’s the last thing she needs,’ he said, horrified. ‘She won’t believe it, and that will make things worse.’

  ‘Of course she’ll believe it. Why shouldn’t she?’

  ‘Because she’s very bright and not easily fooled. And even if she does believe it, think what’ll happen. She’ll ask you a lot of questions that you won’t know how to answer. It’s a mad idea.’

  ‘Gino, please, I’m only trying to give her a little happiness. I’m just so glad you told me the way her mind was working.’

  ‘I’m beginning to wish I hadn’t.’ In his urgency Gino took hold of her shoulders. ‘Laura, listen to me. Nikki isn’t just intelligent, she’s strong and brave, and she’s worked out a way of coping.’

  ‘Coping? Telling herself stories-’

  ‘She’s invented that fantasy because she needs it. It keeps her going. When she doesn’t need it any more she’ll abandon it, but she has to pick the moment. Don’t try to force her.’

  Suddenly she was angry.

  ‘Gino, I know what I’m doing. She’s my daughter, and I think I know what’s best for her.’

  He made a wry grimace and dropped his hands, turnin
g away as he did so. At once Laura was horrified at herself.

  ‘Oh, no, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean that. You’ve been so good to both of us-’

  ‘Well, I suppose you’re right,’ he sighed. ‘She’s your child and you know her better than I do. I’m sorry, Laura. Please forget I said anything.’

  ‘If only I knew what was the right thing to do! I never do know, you see. It’s always a choice of two wrongs.’

  ‘I know,’ he said gently. ‘And I just worry and confuse you. You’re her mother, and I have no right to interfere.’

  When the day came, everyone in the boarding house brought Nikki gifts and cards, and left them stacked by her place at breakfast. It was a Saturday so she didn’t have to rush.

  ‘All for me?’ she asked, eyes shining.

  ‘Every single one, my darling,’ Laura told her.

  One by one the child opened her cards and gifts, exclaiming with delight over everything.

  Finally there was one left. Laura had kept it back on purpose. Nikki opened the card, a big, lavish one with the words, ‘Happy Birthday to my daughter’ emblazoned in gilt letters.

  She frowned, reading the verse, looking at where it read, Thinking of you, darling, with love, Daddy.

  ‘Why, it’s from Daddy,’ Laura said brightly. ‘Isn’t that nice?’

  But Nikki dropped the card as though it had stung her. ‘It’s not from Daddy,’ she said in a deadly quiet voice.

  ‘Darling, it is-’

  ‘It’s not from Daddy-’ Her words were coming jerkily now. ‘It’s not from Daddy because-because Daddy’s dead-he’s dead-he’s dead-’

  ‘Darling-’ Laura touched her gently. ‘Daddy isn’t dead-’

  ‘He is, he is,’ Nikki cried. ‘That’s why he never comes to see me, because he’s dead, he’s dead.’

  She burst out crying bitterly, burying her face in her arms on the table. Her shoulders heaved with sobs.

  Gino closed his eyes.

  The others slipped quietly away, knowing that they had no place here. Laura put her arms around Nikki and drew her child close. Her face was distraught as she realised the catastrophic mistake she had made.

  ‘Darling,’ she said soothingly, ‘darling, oh, my darling-I’m so sorry.’

  Gino began to move to the door, but over Nikki’s shoulder Laura’s eyes frantically met his. With a little shake of her head she begged him not to go.

  He hesitated. Much as he longed to help, this was surely something that Nikki and her mother must resolve together. He was afraid of making things worse. But he couldn’t ignore the appeal in Laura’s eyes, or the heartbroken sobs coming from the child.

  ‘Nikki,’ Laura was saying, stroking her head, ‘let me-’

  But she was checked by a shriek. Nikki flung her mother’s hand off and jumped up from the chair.

  ‘Daddy’s dead!’ she screamed. ‘He’s dead, he’s dead, he’s dead! I hate you, I hate you.’

  Tears were pouring down Laura’s face.

  ‘Daddy loved me,’ Nikki screamed, ‘and if-if he was alive he’d be here, and he’d give me a present and a card. He wouldn’t go away and leave me because he loved me best in all the world. You’re a liar and I hate you.’

  Her voice rose to a shriek of anguish. Wail after wail poured from her while her arms flailed in all directions, as if she would fend off the whole world. When Laura tried to reach for her Nikki lashed out, refusing to allow her mother near her.

  ‘Nikki, please,’ Laura begged.

  The little girl’s only answer was another shriek. The misery of years, bottled up, had finally been released in an unstoppable explosion.

  Appalled by such agony, Gino realised that neither words nor reason would be any help now. Only one thing could help, and he did it.

  Dropping to his knees in front of Nikki he put his arms around her and drew her tightly against him, ignoring her flailing fists that pummelled madly against his head and shoulders.

  At last Nikki gave up fighting him and stood with her arms about his neck, sobbing violently.

  ‘Povera piccina,’ he murmured. ‘Povera piccina.’

  She went on crying, and he let her do so, not trying to calm her, except by the firm pressure of his arms, with their silent message of safety and affection. He knew she must end this in her own good time.

  Laura watched them, devastated, yet desperately thankful that there was someone for the two of them to cling onto.

  It seemed to take a long time, but at last Nikki’s tears abated. Too exhausted to weep any more, she just stood, clinging to Gino, hiccuping.

  ‘Piccina,’ he said softly.

  ‘Yes?’

  ‘You’re strangling me.’

  Nikki gave a choking laugh and slightly loosened her grip. But she did not release him. He was safety.

  ‘Your poor Momma,’ he chided gently. ‘You frightened her.’

  ‘Sorry,’ Nikki whispered.

  ‘It’s all right, darling,’ Laura said.

  There was an ominous pause. They were in a mine-field.

  ‘We’ll talk about it later,’ Gino said firmly. ‘Much later. Now we have important things to do.’

  ‘What important things?’ Nikki asked huskily.

  ‘We have a funfair to go to. There’s one in the park. I think they put it there to celebrate your birthday.’

  Disengaging herself from Gino’s arms Nikki hugged her mother.

  ‘I didn’t mean it, Mummy. I just-I just-’

  ‘It’s all right,’ Laura said quickly. ‘It’s really all right. Why don’t you go and wash your face?’

  She was talking for the sake of talking, anything to let the dangerous moment slip past. When Nikki had gone away she said desperately, ‘Are we going to let it hang in the air, with nothing settled?’

  ‘It might be best,’ Gino said. ‘She’s told you what she needs to believe. You can’t confirm it, but you don’t have to deny it. Just let it go for a while.’

  ‘I should have listened to you,’ Laura admitted. ‘But I thought she’d like to hear from him.’

  ‘She prefers to think of him as dead,’ Gino said sadly, ‘because death is easier to cope with than rejection. A present and a card are all very well, but he wasn’t here, was he? She knows they weren’t really from him, just as, in her heart, she knows he’s abandoned her. But she doesn’t want to know it yet. She wants to go on believing in him, and you threatened that.’

  She gazed at him, shaking her head in wonder. ‘How do you understand so much?’

  He’d been puzzling about that himself, mystified at his own instinctive knowledge. But now the conscious memory came back to him.

  ‘I once consoled myself with a similar fantasy,’ he said in a tone of discovery. ‘My mother died when I was about Nikki’s age, and for a long time I wouldn’t let myself believe it. I’m nearly ten years younger than my brother, so I suppose she made a favourite of me, the way the baby of the family tends to become a favourite.

  ‘I just couldn’t face the fact that she’d gone away for ever. So I told myself she was still alive. I used to talk to my father about her, as though she was coming home at any moment.

  ‘And Poppa always played up to me. For my sake he’d talk as though she was coming home at any moment, although it must have broken his heart. He was a very wise and loving man.’

  Gino stopped and seemed lost in a reverie. Laura had a feeling that their surroundings had vanished and he could see again the Tuscan farmhouse where he’d spent his happy childhood.

  ‘What happened?’ she asked after a while.

  ‘On the first anniversary of her death I saw Poppa and Rinaldo getting ready to go out, dressed in their Sunday best. I knew, without anything being said, that they were going to visit her grave. Poppa looked at me, with a question in his eyes, and I put my best clothes on and went with them. I could cope with it then, you see, because Poppa let me pick my own moment.

  ‘It’s harder for Nikki than it was for me. As I sai
d, death can be endured. It’s rejection that’s unbearable.’

  ‘And I can’t help her there, can I?’ Laura brooded. She took Gino’s hand. ‘But you can. Only you, it seems, because you’re a man and she can imagine you in her father’s place.’

  ‘You know I’ll do anything she needs. I can stay with her today if you like. Later on we’ll go to the funfair, the three of us, and anyone else who wants to come.’

  In the event the entire household went. Since it was the early evening Bert and Fred weren’t due to go to work until later.

  Gino found a stall selling huge silly hats with broad brims, and bought some for himself, Laura and Nikki. Nikki’s covered most of her forehead, leaving her nothing to worry about but enjoying herself.

  Everyone halted at the huge roller coaster. Only Nikki was really eager to go on it. Bert and Fred didn’t even pretend not to be cowards. Laura gulped and said she thought she could manage, but Nikki took firm hold of Gino’s hand and said, ‘Come on.’

  ‘I’m not scared,’ he told Laura faintly. ‘I’m not scared, I’m not scared, I’m not-all right, Nikki, don’t pull!’

  At the top of the first long drop there was a camera, clicking away at everyone as they reached the last moment before the ghastly descent. Once back on the ground they bought the picture. It showed Nikki full of exhilaration while Gino regarded the drop with stark, wide-eyed horror. They all had a lot of fun with that.

  Later that night, when everyone else was in bed, Gino said awkwardly, ‘Laura, you mustn’t mind that Nikki clings to me a little. You’re her mother, and I’m a stranger-’

  ‘You’re not a stranger,’ Laura said quickly. ‘You never could be. I’m not jealous. I’m grateful to whichever fate sent you to us.’

  Suddenly she made a swift movement, taking his head between her hands and kissing him briefly on the lips.

  ‘That’s for being wonderful,’ she said, and went away before he could say anything.

  Whichever fate sent you. The words resounded in his head. More and more he’d felt that he had no control over what happened to him, that he was merely following signposts.

  Gino would have been the first to admit that he’d been irresponsible most of his life, having little reason to be otherwise. The events that had driven him from his home had matured him, but also shipwrecked him.