Sawbones

by Melissa Lenhardt

“Who’s buried next to your father?”

  Black raised his eyebrows. “Billy’s told you about our family history?”

  “A little.”

  “I doubt it resembled the truth.” Black folded his hands on his saddle horn as if settling in for a long tale. “Being a Confederate officer, I was at Johnson’s Island, a rather nice camp, compared to some. The poor fellow buried next to my father was a soldier who had the bad fortune to look a bit like me. He died, an unfortunate accident, and I dressed him in my clothes. I had to pretend to be an enlisted man for the remainder of the time. The rations weren’t as good but I was saved having to perform in the officer’s production of The Taming of the Shrew. Small price to pay.”

  “Why would you want to be dead?” Anna said.

  “There was nothing left for me in Maryland.”

  “What about your children?” I asked.

  “Too young to be of use.”

  The urge to strike out at the smug, arrogant bastard in the only way I could was too great. “Who’s to say they’re your children? Beau’s resemblance to William is striking.”

  The self-assured arrogance melted from Black’s face. The flare of satisfaction in my breast was short-lived. His hand was around my throat, squeezing. “Did I hit a nerve?” I croaked. I tried to smile in hopes of infuriating him even more.

  “If Franklin has done his job, Billy is well on his way here. Your dead body will do as well as your live one. As long as Billy knows you died by my hand, I get the same result. I have a witness now, thanks to your cleverness.”

  He continued to squeeze my throat, cutting off the possibility of breath as well as speech. The edges of my vision darkened and my face burned. I grasped at his hands, forgetting mine were tied, useless. When I thought I was going to lose consciousness, his grip relaxed, but didn’t release. He looked at me as if I was a fascinating science experiment. “You know I can shut you up forever, don’t you?”

  I tried to nod but couldn’t.

  “Please, don’t hurt her,” Anna pleaded.

  “How sweet,” Black replied. His eyes stayed on me. “It would be perfect. If I know Billy, he loves you as much for your mind as for your body. He’s a big talker, our Billy. Did you two have deep, meaningful conversations?”

  I shook my head no, still struggling for air.

  “You didn’t? How disappointing. I’m sure it wasn’t for his lack of trying.”

  “I…woch…” Black loosened his grip enough so I could talk. “Please. I won’t say another word. I promise.”

  He grabbed the back of my neck with his free hand and released my throat. I gasped for air. “If you hadn’t begged me, I would have left you alone.” His lip curled into a cruel smile, and he punched me in the throat.

  I doubled over in pain and gagged. Panic rushed through me as I struggled to breathe. The seconds I couldn’t catch my breath seemed like hours. Black watched my agony through narrowed eyes. Finally, air filled my lungs.

  “Laura?” Anna said, crying.

  “She won’t answer you,” Black said. “Keep your mouth shut unless you want the same thing to happen to you.”

  * * *

  We crossed a shallow creek and stopped at a stand of trees that went up a hill. Black untied me from my horse first, rightly assuming I would be as docile as a baby. He left our hands tied, tied the remaining ropes around our waists, and then tied me to Anna.

  The narrow trail rose sharply between scrubby trees. Lizards, snakes, and field mice scuttled away as we picked our way up the rocky trail and around flowering cacti. The floor of the canyon was the same brilliant red of the walls and soon the dust was floating around us, getting in our eyes and choking our throats. My cough came out as a gag.

  Without warning we were out of the undergrowth and at the base of a large rock formation. Two columns topped by boulders nearly ready to topple flanked a flat table of red rock. It looked like crumbling battlements of an abandoned castle.

  The final climb was the most difficult, diagonally up the steep side of the rock. Anna slipped and fell face-first. Black continued on, dragging her, as Anna struggled up without use of her hands. I tried to help her, but she fell again. Black didn’t stop. I tried to yell at him but only a raspy croak came out.

  “Oh! Did you say something?” He stopped and smirked while Anna got to her feet. We continued on the final few yards.

  The view was spectacular. The canyon spread out before us, a green carpet of trees in the river valley topped with the vibrant reds and golds of the rock against the canvas of a bright blue sky. I took no pleasure in the beauty around me. I knew it was God’s way of masking the darkness underneath. Nothing so beautiful could ever be trusted.

  Black untied Anna from me and sat her against a small jut of rock about halfway between the two looming columns. He retied her hands and feet and stayed squatted beside her. “I’m not going to have to gag you, am I?”

  She shook her head no.

  Black pushed a piece of Anna’s hair behind her ear. She didn’t move or flinch. “You’re the same age as my daughter, or thereabouts,” Black said, voice tender. “I haven’t seen her since she was a child, but I bet she looks like you. Blond hair, blue eyes. It’s a damn shame what they did to you.” He sighed.

  “You’re lucky, you know. I knew a girl like you, not as pretty, who had her nose cut off. One look at her and you know what she went through. In time, you’ll look like any other young woman.” With a fatherly pat on Anna’s knee, Black stood. “You look like a smart girl. Behave and don’t get in the way and I will take you to Jacksboro, give you some money to start a new life. Would you like that?”

  Anna nodded. “Yes.” Her voice cracked. “Thank you.”

  Black faced me. It was the most difficult act I ever performed, but I steadily returned his gaze. He could do whatever he wanted to me, make me do whatever he wanted, but I refused to let him think I was cowed by him. I had no voice, and no strength, but I still had my mind and my pride.

  One side of his mouth crooked up the same way Kindle’s did. A wave of sadness, regret, and love almost overwhelmed my resolve. My face remained passive, though, while my heart broke beneath the weight of lost possibilities.

  “I can see why Billy loves you,” Black said. He laughed at my reaction. “I can see all the questions colliding in your head, struggling to break free. Thank God I’ll be spared that.”

  He scanned the horizon with a shiny brass spyglass. “You look nothing like Victoria but in demeanor you’re cut from the same cloth.” He paused. I followed the direction of his gaze and saw nothing but trees and scrub. “My guess is she wasn’t nearly as good a fuck as you are. She was too godly to be good in the bedroom. Hell, maybe Billy’s fucked enough whores in the last few years he’s gotten better at it. Who knows?” Black collapsed the spyglass and put it back in his saddlebag.

  “Victoria, though, she was too busy saving the niggers from slavery to give Billy much attention. Oh, I’m sure he played the grieving husband to the hilt, but I doubt the loss of Victoria was too profound. I’m sure Billy told you all about Victoria.”

  I stood with my hands tied in front of me and stared straight ahead. Black’s physical resemblance to Kindle was too keen. Black moved forward, his face inches from mine.

  “You mean to tell me Billy was able to seduce you without telling you anything about himself?”

  I shrugged my shoulders.

  “Did he tell you how he got his scar? A pack of lies, no doubt. Billy always was good at making himself look like the good guy, like he’s completely blameless.”

  Black removed a gun from his holster and checked his ammunition. “I’ve been leaving little clues for Billy for a while.”

  “Such as?” Anna asked. Her voice was animated, almost giddy, most like at the idea of freedom Black planted in her head. Or possibly she was merely adapting to the situation to survive, much as she had done with the Comanche.

  Black loaded his gun. “Cotter Black was the name o
f a slave on our plantation. This was back in about forty-seven. Billy was twelve. Cotter Black escaped with Billy’s help. I let Cotter get far enough away to make the chase fun and told my father. My father tracked Cotter down and brought him back. He beat him with his cane in front of everyone, slave and family alike. He made Billy deliver the final blows.”

  “You brother sounds like a brave and stupid child,” Anna said.

  I stared at buzzards circling the canyon floor a half mile away and nodded in appreciation. Anna would be fine.

  “More stupid than brave.” Black snapped the cylinder into the gun and holstered it.

  “Cotter got what he deserved. So did Billy. He never helped another slave, that’s for goddamn sure. I knew when Billy heard the name he would wonder if it was me, come to seek my revenge.”

  “Revenge for what?” Anna asked. “The war?”

  Black removed the other gun and checked it, ignoring her question.

  “Who’s Franklin?” Anna tried.

  “The sutler at Fort Richardson. That’s not his real name. Loyal as a dog. I spared his life when I attacked his Army supply train. Nabbed a nice supply of Winchesters. They paid your ransom, Catherine.

  “Franklin ran our malingering scam with Welch, among other things. Not a great moneymaker, but for a man like Welch it was enough. We needed Welch to get information Franklin couldn’t. When you came along, Catherine, he wasn’t useful anymore. Beating him with a cane was for Billy’s benefit.”

  Which is why Kindle had Sergeant Washington guarding me.

  He holstered his other gun. “The day you saw me across the creek, Catherine, I was looking for you. It’s true. Welch told me about the sawbones who saved Billy’s life and I had to see you for myself. A woman doctor. You don’t get to see one of those every day.”

  He circled me, slowly, coming closer and closer with each turn. “You were a revelation, Catherine. Much too handsome to be a doctor.” He ran his hand down my arm. I shivered in disgust.

  “A woman like you, alone on the frontier. It was plain from a hundred yards away you were raised to be a lady, marry some fat businessman, and have a houseful of kids before you’re thirty.” He stopped behind me and put an arm around my waist. His breath was sour, rancid, as if he was rotting from the inside. He pulled me back against him. I closed my eyes to block out the sensation of his body against mine.

  “I wondered if my luck would change,” Black murmured in my ear. “If Billy would finally reveal a little weakness. I’ve followed Billy across the West, waiting for a sign. Waiting for you.” I heard the scrape of metal on leather and felt the cold steel of a knife on my cheek. I inhaled a shaky breath. Urine trickled down the inside of my leg.

  “When I heard you accused Foster of grafting…” Black nuzzled my ear. “I knew you would be my brother’s type. And I was right.”

  My jaws ached from grinding my teeth together against crying or screaming. Every breath was jagged with the effort to control my emotions. If I’d kept my distance from Kindle as I had intended, none of us would be here. Black wouldn’t be able to use me as bait for whatever revenge he had planned for his brother.

  I looked at Anna. But she would still be a captive. I took a steadying breath and thought of Anna’s future, the one thing worth salvaging. She could move past this, have a normal, long, happy life. If I did what Black asked, he would take her to Jacksboro. Despite everything, I believed him.

  “I’ve been on enough Wanted posters to ascertain what Pope showed you that day. You don’t have as good a poker face as you think you do, darlin’. I had a pang of conscience about putting Pope out of commission like I did. He’s only guilty of being a bad gambler and borderline drunk. Anyone in his position would have turned you in. It was harder than I thought, but worth it when I saw you and Billy on the road to Jacksboro.” Black’s hand found my breast. I squeezed my eyes shut as he fondled me.

  He traced the edge of my jaw with his knife. “I have a surprise for you. Do you like surprises?”

  I didn’t know what answer he wanted so I remained silent and didn’t move.

  “I watched the Comanche raid your patrol. When they rode away, I finished the lingering soldiers off.” Black pressed the metal against my bottom lip and pulled it down. “I also saved a couple of things for you. Things you will need to start your new life.” Black stepped in front of me. “Sherman’s letter and a beautiful necklace.”

  I inhaled sharply and tried to keep my expression passive. Black grinned, knowing he had stunned me.

  “When I found my father alone,” Black said, “laying in his own shit before Antietam, he made me promise to make Billy pay for betraying and destroying our family. I’m sorry I didn’t kill Billy then. If I would’ve, you wouldn’t be here now. The Canadian would have never happened. I can’t change that, but I will keep my word to you, and Anna, as I’ve kept my word to my father.” Black’s eyes searched my face and lingered on my lips. “Will you keep your word?”

  Fear gripped my stomach and twisted, but I nodded once.

  Black stepped closer and put a hand behind my neck. His other hand held the knife. “Kiss me.”

  I tried to pull away, but he held my head firm. The sun sat above his right shoulder, shining in my eyes and turning him into a looming shadow. Though I couldn’t see her, I knew Anna watched and waited, wondering what I would do. I thought of her giving herself to Quanah to ensure my protection, and swallowing my disgust, lifted my mouth to Black. I pressed my lips to his and pulled back. He twisted my hair in his hand. “You have to do better than that.” The tip of his knife bit into my throat. I pressed my throat against the blade. I would rather die than kiss Cotter Black like a lover. He pulled the knife away, and I spit in his face.

  He wiped away the spit and flicked it on the ground.

  “You’ve got spirit, I’ll give you that,” he said, with a chuckle. He flipped the knife around, and for a split second, I thought he was going to stab me. Instead, he hit me with his closed fist.

  I grunted but did not scream or cry. Blood trickled down my cheek. I wiped it off with my hand and stared at it there before smearing it down the front of Black’s shirt. He hit me again. My legs wobbled, but Black held me up by my neck, like a puppet.

  “Do you think I’m going to rape you?”

  I nodded.

  “No,” he said, his voice full of pity. With light fingers, Black brushed my hair from my face. “You’re tainted now, Catherine. I wish it wasn’t so, but it is.” Black pulled my head to the side, exposing my neck, and kissed me softly behind my ear in the exact place his brother favored. I squeezed my eyes closed as memories of Kindle flashed through my hazy mind. “I’m sorry for what happened on the Canadian,” Black said, and I heard the timbre of Kindle’s low, intimate voice. Black trailed kisses down my neck and back up to my cheek before resting his soft, bearded cheek against mine. “You didn’t deserve it. It’s a damn shame, a passionate woman like you being ruined like that.”

  Black released my hair. “Look at me, Catherine.” I opened my eyes. Black looked on me with Kindle’s eyes. He squeezed the back of my neck gently, as if massaging a kink from sore muscles. “You’ll never kiss another man. My brother’s nobility? It’s an act. He may stay by you, but he’ll never touch you again.”

  I shuddered with the effort to keep from crying aloud. My tears flowed too freely and quickly for the gusting wind to dry them. The sense of numb hopelessness that overcame me after the massacre returned. I thought back to the image of Death riding toward me and wished, again, he had succeeded.

  “Shh, don’t cry.” Black kissed my cheek and the corner of my mouth. “I’m giving you a gift,” he whispered, his lips against mine, his hand stroking my hair. “A chance to forget everything you’ve been through. To let you be loved one last time.” When I didn’t respond, his voice turned hard. “And, you made a deal. If you break it, I will sell you and Anna to the worst batch of buffalo hunters I can find.”

  Black lifted my c
hin with the blade of his knife. “Think of my brother, if it makes it easier.”

  Sobbing, I kissed him. His lips were soft, pliant, gentle, like his brother’s. I turned my head away, my shoulders shaking from weeping. The cold metal of the knife pressed against my cheek as Black turned my face back to him.

  “Catherine,” he said, his voice low and seductive. He pressed his lips against mine, opened his mouth and waited for me to deepen the kiss. Swallowing my helpless shame, I let him have his fill, participating enough to hopefully satisfy whatever desire he had, and longed for Kindle. After a time, Black pulled away. I kept my eyes closed, wanting to keep it inside, buried deep, hidden from the realization of what I’d done, and tried to focus on subduing my shaking body, and stifling my sobs. When I had control of myself, I opened my eyes. The wind hit my tear-filled eyes, blurring my vision further. I blinked the tears away and saw Black staring at me in smug triumph. “A goddamn shame.”

  I lifted my hands and tried to scrub the lingering feel of Black’s lips from my mouth. “It’ll take more than that to forget me, Catherine.” I turned my head away and spit.

  His stare shifted over my shoulder, and his face relaxed in relief. “Don’t worry.” He winked, keeping his eyes on the trailhead behind me. “I won’t tell Billy how much you liked it.”

  He grabbed my shoulder and turned me around. His hand was in my hair and his knife was at my neck again before I registered what I saw.

  Kindle stood at the top of the trail, his rifle nocked in his shoulder, his eye trained down the barrel at us. I trembled with relief and humiliation at the sight of him. I could still feel Black’s lips on mine, his tongue in my mouth.

  “John, let her go!” Kindle yelled over the wind.

  “Soon, little brother,” Black called.

  Kindle took two quick steps forward, his limp noticeable. I reached toward Kindle, but Black held me fast by my hair.

  “You just have one more thing to do,” Black said in my ear. Black readjusted the knife, pressing the tip hard against my neck. I could hear the smile in his voice.