What Lola Wants

by Calista Fox

  She kissed him, then asked, “Mind if I stay the night?”

  “Not at all.”

  She climbed off his hunky bod and settled under the covers. Alex made a quick trip to the bathroom before joining her. He draped an arm across her shoulders and she rested her head on his chest. Listened to his heart beating. Listened to his soft breathing.

  “You’re sensational,” she said in a soft voice.

  “No. We’re sensational.”

  Lola smiled.

  This feels good. This feels right.

  Yeah, she was full-on in love.

  Head-over-high-heels in love.

  Chapter Nine

  The next morning, Lola woke to quiet. Not Alex’s heartbeat or breathing or even his light snoring, which she found sexy. Everything about the man was sexy.

  She cracked an eye open and discovered she was alone.

  Running a hand over the rumpled sheets next to her, Lola frowned. They weren’t even warm. How long ago had he left her?

  “Alex?” she called out. When he didn’t answer, she opened both eyes and threw back the duvet.

  She scooped up the T-shirt he’d been wearing last night and slipped it on. She left his room and found Alex in the kitchen, sucking down a protein shake. He rinsed out the glass and put it in the dishwasher as she slid onto a bar stool.

  “Whatcha up to?” she asked.

  “Off to the gym.”

  Her brow furrowed. “It’s not even seven yet. Don’t you sleep in on Sundays?”

  “Good time to hit the machines, while everyone else is in bed or at church.” He snatched his duffel bag from the counter and slung the strap over his broad shoulder. Then he turned toward the door.

  A hint of dread slithered down Lola’s spine. “Hey, don’t I even get a good-morning kiss for the late-night booty call?”

  He glanced back at her. “Yeah, about that.” He hesitated, his brow furrowing. A hint of I have bad news flickered in his eyes. “I’ve been thinking, Lo.”

  Lo. Not baby.

  The dread escalated.

  “This whole friends-with-benefits thing,” he continued, in a tone that was much too serious and decisive first thing in the morning. “Not such a great idea.”

  She hopped off the bar stool, panic seizing her. “What are you talking about? It’s working out fabulously.”

  Facing her, Alex said, “Don’t get me wrong. I’ve had an amazing week. You are definitely something else. But I’ve got a lot of shit going on at the office and I need to concentrate on that. And you’re, well, a distraction.”

  “So… wait a minute.” She shook her head. Tried to get her bearings as the panic nearly stopped her heart. Her stomach became a tight pretzel, and her breath was scarce. “You’re saying you don’t want us to be together anymore? You don’t want us to have sex anymore?”

  “Yeah,” he said with a slow nod. “I think it’s for the best. We’re both focused on our jobs right now, and I want to keep my head in the game. I can’t afford to get laid off.”

  He gave her a quick peck on the cheek—to placate her? Then walked out.

  Lola stared after him, shocked. Dismayed. Confused.

  No. Those words weren’t strong enough. Nowhere near strong enough.

  And now she truly couldn’t breathe. Had to fight to pull in painful slices of air.

  She gripped the edge of the counter as she reeled from Alex’s announcement… and how massively it had devastated her.

  For the first time in her life, Lola was wrecked.

  Really and truly wrecked.

  Thoroughly heartbroken.

  Tears slid down her flushed cheeks as she continued to stare at the door. Willing Alex to return and say he was only kidding. That what he felt for her was as powerful as what she felt for him.

  That they were fated, so of course, he’d only been pulling her leg.

  But Alex didn’t come back.

  And just like that… it was all over between them.

  * * *

  Alex spent two hours at the gym, then showered and went to the office. He worked until four, not getting a hell of a lot done because he kept thinking about Lola.

  She’d wanted him to make love to her last night. Not fuck her. Make love to her. And she’d been so warm and soft and cuddly that he’d been in heaven with her in his bed. It had felt so right, so natural, that it had freaked him out.

  Pete’s words of wisdom stuck in his head, and he knew continuing his involvement with Lola when he was in love and she was just in lust was nothing more than a recipe for disaster.

  As it was, putting an end to the wicked fun made him completely crazed. The mere thought of never having sex with her again caused his gut to coil. And his heart? It felt as though it’d not only been ripped from his chest, but tossed alongside the road and run over by a Mack truck.

  Yes, he’d been the one to end things, not her. And technically, they were just supposed to be having meaningless, scratch-an-itch sex. Not dating. Not getting tangled up in messy feelings.

  But Alex was most definitely tangled up. He’d needed to unravel himself from Lola before his obsession got any worse. Before he went and did something really stupid, like tell her he was madly, desperately, irrevocably in love with her.

  You did the right thing.

  Was that his voice or Pete’s? And why did ending the FWB feel so fucking… wrong?

  * * *

  On the drive back to the condo, Alex didn’t fare any better with his decision and actually considered telling Lola that he’d suffered a moment of temporary insanity that morning and that, of course, he didn’t want to stop having sex with her.

  He came through the front door, his mind burning with doubts and concerns—and thoughts of Lola in a sexy nightie and stilettos. If he was really fucking lucky, she’d attempt to seduce him back into the friends-with-benefits arrangement. And he’d let her.

  Okay, so he had absolutely no willpower anymore when it came to her. Less than ten hours from the time he’d said no más, he wanted her again.

  Face the glaring facts, man: You’re an addict. She’s your drug.

  He dumped his gym bag on top of the washer and then returned to the kitchen.

  The first thing he noticed was that the flowers were gone.

  “Lo?”

  He crossed to the kitchen table and rounded the island, heading toward her room.

  That was when he discovered where the bouquet had gone. It was stuffed into the tall, stainless-steel trash can, the top of the floral arrangement shooting out of the can because it was so damn big.

  “Oh. Shit.” His stomach coiled even tighter. “Lola?”

  He went into the guest bedroom. Everything was immaculate and tidy. In its proper place. Devoid of even the tiniest hint that Lola Vonn had ever been there. He bent down and sniffed the sheets. Freshly laundered.

  In the bathroom, he found clean, folded towels and every surface scrubbed and polished. All of her stuff was gone. There wasn’t even the slightest whiff of her alluring lilac perfume lingering in the air.

  Alex’s eyes squeezed shut.

  Lo had left him.

  His gut wrenched. His heart constricted.

  Why not just kill himself now and get it over with?

  He tried to be reasonable. He’d pissed her off. Maybe even hurt her feelings—because he’d said he didn’t think it was a good idea for them to sleep together anymore?

  Sure, it was possible she’d taken that sentiment as rejection. For Alex, it’d been self-preservation. But Lola didn’t know that, did she?

  “Shit. Shit. Shit.”

  He opened his eyes and returned to the kitchen, where he found a note on the counter.

  I’ll mail the keys to you.

  He reached for his cell and punched in the speed dial number for her as he paced the kitchen. His call went straight to voice mail. He texted her.

  Call me ASAP.

  No response.

  Alex went into extreme panic mode, e
verything around him coming to a screeching halt. And crumbling at too rapid a rate for him to get a grip on it all. Or even to breathe normally.

  * * *

  Lola sat in the middle of the sofa in her parents’ house. Alone. And, once again, lonely.

  She already missed Alex. She already missed having dinner with him. Laughing with him. Kissing him. Feeling his body pressed to hers, feeling him buried inside her.

  It occurred to Lola that she’d probably been in love with him longer than she’d realized. Like maybe even back in high school, when she’d gone to all of his debates and had been his campaign manager for Student Body President. Rallying support for him because she believed in him as much he did her—and she’d wanted to help him achieve whatever dream he had. She’d had clout, and she’d used it to back him every chance she got.

  They’d always been together. Inseparable until she’d moved to Baltimore.

  But even that first split from him hadn’t been nearly as painful as this one. Because now she could see and admit that she truly was in love with Alex.

  And Alex didn’t want her.

  The backs of her eyes burned, and she blinked hard to keep the tears at bay. It wasn’t as though he’d used her, after all. She’d been the one to make the FWB proposition. She’d been the one to instigate the whole steamy and highly dangerous romance.

  And it really had felt like a romance. Every single second of their time together had felt to Lola as though they were getting even closer to each other. It’d been a sexy, fun, and intimate affair. One she’d been emotionally invested in, even if that fact had dawned on her belatedly.

  Her heart was fully engaged.

  But again…

  Alex. Didn’t. Want. Her.

  She couldn’t hold back the tears. She let the fat drops roll down her cheeks as the sting of rejection sliced through her core, making her ache—for the only thing she truly wanted.

  Alex.

  Chapter Ten

  “The ad agency is going to be here at one,” Tiff said. “Why do you look so blue? And your eyes are bloodshot.”

  “Bad allergies,” Lola said with a wave of her hand.

  “I’ll run out and get you some drops.”

  “That’s nice. Thank you.”

  Sarah fell into step with her as Lola performed Dead Man Walking toward her cube. “You okay?”

  “No.”

  She set her bag on the desk and pulled out her laptop.

  “Seriously, Lola.” Sarah rested a gentle hand on her arm. Concern laced her voice. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

  It was so excruciating to hold it all inside, but equally agonizing to admit, “Flower guy dumped me.”

  “No. Way.” Sarah gaped, staring at Lola in utter disbelief. Recovering quickly, she said, “No one sends a bouquet like that when they’re planning to dump someone.”

  “You’d think, but… that’s what happened. I mean, maybe not so much, exactly.” She shook her head as she waited impatiently for her computer to boot up. Her pulse didn’t seem to beat at a normal pace, and she felt numb inside, with the exception of the knife continually shredding her heart into thin ribbons.

  She said, “Alex was my best friend. He let me stay at his apartment while mine was getting ready and I… sort of—no, I totally—suggested we dabble in the whole friends-with- benefits thing. He went for it. For a week. But then yesterday morning, he called it all off. I don’t get it, especially not after the way we’d made love the night before. I felt the connection between us—stronger than ever.”

  “Oh, wow.” Sarah looked taken aback. She grimaced. “Friends with benefits. Never a good idea, Lola.”

  “But it was a good idea,” she insisted. “Everything was going along perfectly. We’re awesome together. And I realized I was in love with him, but I didn’t even get the chance to tell him.” She considered this, finding one tiny silver lining. “Thank God I didn’t tell him. What a nightmare that would be.”

  Utter humiliation to the nth degree.

  Sarah seemed to consider the situation for a few moments, then kindly suggested, “Maybe he met someone else, and since you guys weren’t being serious about a relationship, he went in a different direction.”

  “He told me he’d never be with someone else while he was with me. I believed him. Maybe I was wrong…” She shook her head. Recalled how tense Alex had gotten when he’d thought she might have hooked up with someone else the night she’d gone to Maya. “I don’t know. This doesn’t make any sense. He claimed it was work. That I distract him.”

  Sarah gave her a consoling smile. “I can see how that might be the case.”

  “I want him back,” Lola told her, as their gazes locked. Desperation edged her voice as she said, “I want him for real. I know we’re more than just friends. He has to feel it too. What the hell do I do?”

  Her new friend gave her a sympathetic look. “I’m so sorry about all of this, Lola. But first and foremost, you have to prep for our meeting with the ad agency.”

  Lola groaned. “The last thing I want to think about is a sexy shoe campaign.”

  “You’ve come too far to drop the ball now.” Sarah reached for Lola’s hand and gave it a quick squeeze, as Staci had done on Friday. Maybe it was a family thing. “Get it together, Lola. There’s a hell of a lot at stake here. And trust me, if you don’t kick ass this morning, you’ll be so stressed out over it, consumed by it, that you won’t be able to think clearly enough to figure out what to do about Alex.”

  “Right,” she said. “You’re so right. This campaign means the world to me. And we’ve put our hearts and souls into it—really knocked it out of the park in a very short period of time. I can’t fuck this up.” A hollow laugh slipped from her lips. “This is really all I’ve got now. My career.”

  “And your friends,” Sarah assured her.

  Tears stung Lola’s eyes. “Thank you. Honestly. I mean it.”

  Sarah nodded. “Deep breaths. Step into the ladies’, use the eyedrops, pull yourself together. Slay this meeting.”

  “Yes. Absolutely.”

  Lola sniffled, sucked it up, and collected herself. Then she delivered her campaign idea to the ad agency. They were impressed, somewhat blown away, in fact, eyeing her as though they wondered where the hell she’d come from. A substantial compliment.

  Yet Lola still felt there was something missing from the campaign. As though she still wasn’t seeing the big picture. But the agency execs said they’d take her pitch and run with it. They’d have mock-ups by the end of the week.

  The Marketing management seemed pleased, but Lola paced the conference room after everyone left and tried to latch on to whatever it was that she found so elusive. She had the sense that there was a broader market to tap into—but what was it? And how the hell was she going to crack the nut when the most significant thing on her mind was Alex?

  Bristling a bit, she went about the rest of her day. She finally checked her cell, having turned it off after she’d left Alex’s house. She saw that he’d called. Repeatedly. He’d sent her a dozen or so texts as well. She ignored them all for the time being, focusing instead on the voicemail from her apartment complex. She called them back and found that her new pad was ready for her to move into, so she contacted the moving company that had stored her packed belongings in Baltimore and asked them to make the cross-country delivery.

  In the meantime, she’d stay at her parents’ house. They weren’t due back for a few more days, right around the time her furniture and the rest of her clothes and shoes would arrive.

  By Friday, Lola still hadn’t worked out in her mind what final thread needed to be woven into the ad campaign. Nor did she have any idea what to do about her situation with Alex. She’d fallen in love. He hadn’t. And that would have a huge impact on how they’d move forward as friends. Because Lola couldn’t go a single day without thinking about how badly she wanted him. Or how much she missed him. That was torturous. One friend couldn’t be in love
when the other could turn off his attraction with the snap of his fingers.

  So… what? Not only were they no longer lovers, but they were no longer friends?

  That thought tore her up and brought on the waterworks so that she had trouble putting her makeup on before work. She bypassed the mascara altogether and headed into the office.

  Luckily, there was plenty to do to occupy her time and mind. As she stared at the mock-ups displayed on easels set along the back wall of the conference room, she saw her vision come to life. Not the hard-core dominatrix one, but the more flirty workplace-and-romance one that left a few things to the imagination, but was still suggestive enough to give the sense of strong women successfully conquering the boardroom and the bedroom. Being assertive. Taking initiative. Yet sharing the power.

  “Leave Your Shoes On…” was the slogan the agency had gone with, and it totally worked with their mock-ups.

  Lola gazed at the last proof, a bedroom with the door partially open, a man lying on the bed in briefs, a woman with her back to the doorway, resting her bent knee on the edge of the mattress and staring down at her soon-to-be-lover. She was in sexy lavender lingerie and even sexier purple Mary Janes. Very provocative.

  Lola thought of Alex again. He’d liked her in lingerie and heels. Had completely lost it for her when she’d dressed up sexily for him.

  And that’s when it hit her. Hard.

  She said, “We’re missing the male demographic.”

  “As in the gender-benders?” Jen asked.

  “Do we even make shoes in size thirteen?” Tiff inquired.

  “I’m not talking about transsexuals—although, yeah, that’s totally another market to consider. Right now, though, I’m thinking about men who like their women in sexy shoes. We should make it easy for them to keep their ladies in Staci Kay footwear. We should have a Staci Kay credit card. And gift cards. Do you know that we don’t have gift cards? I always found that odd. They should be a glossy black and say “Leave Your Shoes On…” scrawled in a crimson-colored font that looks like lipstick. And they should be available everywhere—all the places that have a gift card kiosk or mall. Even online.”