by Blue Saffire
My skin tingles being this near to him. Memories of the last time his head was between my legs, causes my heart to race. His eyes darken, as if he is thinking of the same thing.
“Have you thought about us?” he murmurs, as the next song flows in smoothly.
“I always think about us,” I whisper back.
“You know what I mean,” he frowns.
I sigh, nodding my head. “I have a lot of thoughts about what you said. I know things need to change. I…I want them to change. I…I just, sometimes I’m still scared,” I admit.
“Of what, Baby,” Brax pleas. “It can’t be our age. I’ve proved to you over and over that doesn’t matter. If you just tell me I’ll fix it.”
I go to answer just as Uncle Ronan and a drunken Lucy dance by. Brax glares at them both. Uncle Ronan gives me a sly wink.
“I’m impressed, I am,” he says, before dancing Lucy away.
“Let’s go,” Brax says, grabbing my hand and tugging me from the tent.
“Brax, slow down,” I huff, trying to keep up in my heels.
He looks back and down at my feet. A frown takes over his face. In the next motion, I’m in the air, then tucked against his chest. A gasp slips from my lips, but my protest remains locked in my mouth, as I see the determination in his eyes.
Something has changed.
Chapter 39
Your Mine
Braxton
I can’t hold back any longer. We need to talk. The wedding, the teasing, it all showed me that I need to let everyone know who Heather belongs to. She has to make a decision.
I make it up the hill to the house, with her body tucked into my chest. It feels so fucking good to hold her. I don’t release her, even as we make it upstairs to the room I’ve been calling my own for the last few days.
Once inside, I shut the door with my back and maneuver lock to it. I don’t want anyone thinking their funny, trying to burst in to interrupt. This conversation is long overdue.
I place Heather on the bed and take a seat beside her. Reaching for her ankles, I lift them into my lap and remove her shoes. Then, I kick off my own. Keeping our eyes on each other, we both climb into the center of the bed. Heather folds her legs in front of her, while I cage her in with mine bent on the sides of her.
“What are you still afraid of,” I coax gently.
Heather looks down at her fingers that she’s twisting in her lap. I’m greeted with silence, but I call on the last of my patience. I know I still need to take my time with her. Firm, but gentle, Sephora’s words play in my head.
“I’ve wanted to make love to you again for two years,” Heather finally pushes out. I see the tears in her eyes. “You’ve been nothing but patient. Only going as far as I’m able to. I yearn to give myself to you. I’m…I’m just so afraid that once I do the nightmares will start. Or I’ll freak out or something and then what?
“If…if we tell everyone about us. That just puts so much more pressure on us, on me,” she pauses, as the tears begin to spill over. “God, I sound so fucking selfish. I see that now. I’m so sorry—”
I cut off her words, plucking her up and bringing her into my lap. Wrapping my arms around her, I rock us both back and forth, kissing the top of her head. My heartaches.
Never once in the two years we’ve been together have I felt like she’s been selfish, when it comes to sex. I give her what she needs. When she returns the favor, it’s fucking amazing, but even if she never sucked the life from me through my cock, I’d be fine.
“I never intended for you to feel selfish. What I’m asking you for isn’t even sex. I want to let the world know I’m in love with you. I want to be able to hold your hand in front of my family. I want to have a wedding and make you my wife. Those are the things I’m asking for,” I breathe into her hair.
“Together we can stand the pressure. If it ever becomes too much for you, I’ll shoulder your portion and carry the load. I need you to stop worrying about shit that I’ll never let hurt you. And I mean all of it,” I bite out the last words harder than I mean to.
Heather pulls back, blinking at me. I can see her thoughts racing. Her hand comes up to cup my cheek.
“Okay, I hear you,” she nods.
“At some point, we’ll figure out how to get you over your fear,” I swallow hard. “You know, of us.”
Her fingers stroke the stubble growing on my jaw. I see the moment she makes a decision in her head. Her eyes drop to my lips. “We won’t know, if we don’t try,” she whispers.
“Try what,” I side eye her.
Heather closes the tiny distance between us, her lips pressing to mine. I hesitate at first, but when her tongue traces my lips I take over the kiss. Palming her face I deepen it. I nearly swallow her whole face. It’s been too long since I’ve kiss her like this.
Heather pulls back, panting. She moves from my lap to her knees. Her trembling hands reach for the hem of the Dashiki I wore for the wedding reception.
“Make love to me,” she whispers, lifting the fabric up.
I clasp her wrist, shaking my head. “Not like this. I want to when you’re ready,” I say tightly.
Her eyes lift to mine filled with lust. “I’m ready, Brax,” she breathes.
I search her face thinking. Reaching up, I run a hand through the front of my hair. Heather reaches behind her for the zipper of her dress. I grasp her waist, pulling her into me to stop her.
“Are you sure? If I make love to you, this is it. We’re not doing shit your way anymore. You’re mine once I take that cookie, Baby,” I nip her bottom lip. My voice comes out in a thick rasp. “You’re going to get all of me. Be sure.”
Her hands go into my hair. “I’m sure, make love to me,” she purrs.
I feel my soul roar. I love this woman so much. She has no idea what she’s agreeing to. I’m going to put all the bullshit to bed, but first, I’m going to show my woman what making love without pain should feel like.
I take Heather’s lips just as hungrily as before. She returns the kiss with just as much vigor, if not more. I don’t feel any of the inhibitions that are usually there. My heart hammers, she’s with me this time. I can feel it.
My throat is thick with emotion, as I feel how much she’s laying on the line. Reaching up behind her I ease down the zipper on her dress. I’m taking my time. To me, this is our first time.
I want her to cherish this experience. I plan to erase all others before it. Including me.
I break the seal of our kiss, dragging my lips down her chin. Nipping her flesh, my tongue flicks out to soothe it. A moan slips free from her lush lips, causing me to groan.
Gently, I lay her back against the bed, peeling the dress from her body. My entire being aches, when I see her white bra and panties beneath. Heather wanted to give me her innocence. She once felt robbed of that.
This moment couldn’t be more right. I feel how vulnerable she’s allowing herself to be. That in itself holds so much innocence to me.
I dip my head to kiss her hips, taking a taste of her skin. My eyes flicker up to hers, I see her watching me with wanting in her eyes. My hand slides up her center, drawing goosebumps across her skin. I trail kisses across her stomach to her other hip.
When she arches, lifting her hips up into me in offering, I groan. With my free hand, I grasp her thigh that’s bent on my right side. My other hand palming her full breast. My lips moving to her belly button. I dip it inside for a taste.
Her skin is salty and sweet, the flavor of the Whiskey,—I’d been drinking earlier,—mixes with her flavor, driving me insane. I nuzzle my nose against her belly. My eyes closing briefly, when my emotions threaten to overtake me.
I feel her hand tangle in my hair and my eyes open to look up at her again. A smile forms on her lips and tears spill over from her eyes. My heart races, I move to hover over her.
“Are you okay?” I ask, watching her closely.
“Yes, please, make love to me,” she whispers, reaching to tug my
shirt up.
This time, I allow her to pull it up. I sit up to pull it over my head, tossing it somewhere over my shoulder. I look down at Heather, reaching to thumb away her tears. I dip in to kiss the path they made across her cheeks.
“I love you,” I say like a prayer against her lips.
“I love you too, please,” she pleas.
I take her lips, reaching beneath her to unfasten her strapless bra. Her heavy breasts spill free, drawing my attention. Her nipples come into view, when I pull the lacy fabric away, bringing my mouth to water.
Swallowing, I lick my lips, before covering her tight peak. Heather cries out, bowing off the bed. I have to reach to clench the bedspread beside her head. My restraint is going out the window.
Her nipple pops free from my lips, I have to shake my head clear. Looking down her body, I reach into the front of her panties and find her drenched. My eyes lift to watch her face as she rides my fingers.
My own tears begin to fall, when I feel my long fingers tap her barrier. I’ve never penetrated her since her surgery. I’ve place fruit at her opening to eat from, but that’s always been shallow entries, never this.
“Brax?” her voice comes out concerned, when my tears drip onto her skin.
I shake my head, gathering myself and pull her panties down her legs. I remove the fabric and freeze. I look up at Heather, then squeeze my eyes shut, my jaw ticking.
“I don’t have protection,” I sigh in frustration.
Heather lifts, wrapping her arms around my neck. She pulls me down over her, kissing my jaw. Her lips move to my ear.
“Make love to me,” she whispers.
My eyes flash open, I look to see if she truly understands what I’m saying. She nods her head and kisses me softly.
I go to stroke her again, this time bringing her to a climax. She holds onto me tightly, as her entire body quivers. She’s pressed so closely to me I just barely have enough room to move my hand.
I bring my drenched fingers to my lips and suck on them. The lust that deepens in her hooded orbs, nearly crushes me. She’s ready in so many ways.
I line up with her entrance, sliding against just the outside of her folds. She soaks my cock, snapping the hold I have. I can’t wait any longer.
I push inside just a bit. Heather’s lips part and I still. Her right hand cups my face, while her left threads through my locks.
Again she urges me. “Make love to me.”
Taking her lips, I start to rock, bumping her hymen once, twice, a third time. When she whimpers into my mouth, I grit my teeth and push through. I sob when I feel I’ve broken through, her body accepting half of me.
I still again with my forehead to hers. Her fingers are digging into my back. My chest is so tight.
“I’m okay,” she soothes, beginning to stroke my back. “I’m okay.”
With a trembling hand, I cup her face and kiss her tenderly. I start to move again and crumble. I feel like my skin is being fileted off my body. Our love searing me from head to toe. I ache and tingle everywhere.
“Oh, my God,” I groan. “You were made for me. You’re mine.”
“I know,” she whimpers. “I love you, Braxton. I love you so much.”
Heather
His tears make it hard to breathe. I’ve never felt so loved in my life. As he moves in and out of me, I try to find an anchor to keep me from floating away. I feel like my soul is lifting from my body.
I can’t think of anything else, as he stretches me open for him. There’s silence other than the sound of my armor crumbling to pieces. It’s obliterated.
I take the tenderness out of the kiss as my body soars. I need him, I need to feel more of him. I’m so close. I do my best to give, as he is giving to me.
“I can feel you coming,” he rasps against my lips. “Fuck, Heather, stop moving like that.”
I smile, wrapping my legs around him tightly, while rocking my hips. He hisses a breath, gripping a firm hold of my waist. His head lift to look me in the eyes, his brow lifts.
“If that’s what you want,” he says, with a dark grin on his lips.
My eyes widen, when he shifts a knee under me. Lifting my hips he begins to roll his entire body. My eyes drop between us, the flex and roll of his abs sends cream flooding his thick erection inside me.
I can feel the bars of his latter massaging my insides. My eyes roll back, as I continue to convulse. My toes curl, I feel a tingling inside my belly so close to needing to pee, but I know it’s just the intensity of my orgasms, one after another.
“That’s it, come for me. Do you feel how hard you make me? Shit, I’m going to come so fucking hard. Squeeze, baby. Take me, take this come it’s all yours,” he groans in this sexy voice that sends me hovering again.
I look up at him in confusion at first, but as soon as I feel my pussy spasm around him and see his eyes roll back, I get it. I clamp the muscles inside, squeezing him as tightly as I can.
“Heather,” he roars into my neck, after burying his face there.
I feel his big body quake against mine. Yet, he’s still rock solid inside me. I stroke his back as a few moments pass. His head lifts and those golden eyes look like they’re glowing.
“Do you think you can handle me?” he licks his lips, eyes searching my face.
“Yes,” I nod, moving my hips beneath him.
He snorts. “We’ll see.”
“Don’t talk shit, Brax. Show me,” I tease.
He lifts a brow, before bursting into laughter. He dips his head to peck my lips. He goes to move away, but changes his mind and devours my lips instead. I moan into his mouth, when he starts to move again.
He moves to my ear. “We know I’ve never been talk, Baby. That’s smart mouth just challenged me to slay this pussy. Hope you’re ready for what you asked for,” he hisses darkly, sending a shiver through me.
Braxton spent the next few hours teaching me to be careful what I ask for. I threw all caution to the wind, as I let him take control of my body. Even as he carried my sore body into the bathroom for a bath, I ached to have more of him.
I felt free for the first time in…I don’t want to think how long. When thoughts of my past did enter my mind, they weren’t the haunting and taunting ones. I have a new resolve.
“Brax, I’m ready to let go,” I whisper.
“Good,” he murmurs into my neck.
“No, I don’t think you understand,” I sigh. “I don’t want to hold this anger anymore. I’m going to let it go. We don’t have to go after him. He’s taken enough from me. I want to let go and move on.”
I feel Braxton’s entire body stiffen. The tension that coils in him is palpable. I don’t realize I’m holding my breath until after he speaks.
“Yeah, okay,” he replies. Kissing the top of my head.
I know I shouldn’t leave it at that. I can hear in his voice I shouldn’t leave it at that, but I’m too happy in the moment to argue or get into that mess. I close my eyes and drift off in his strong arms.
Chapter 40
Take All Of Me
Braxton
I can’t help watching her sleep. I want to remember this all for the rest of my life. The first time I ever made love to Heather could never compare to last night.
My face hurts from smiling so much. Heather unleashed is…she’s amazing. The passion, the willingness to follow my lead, the sheer recklessness she gave herself over to. My baby has healed so much and grown more than she’ll ever know or understand. I can see it.
I brush a strand of hair from her face. Her eyes flutter open. I smile wider, when her eyes lift to mine. Her return smile is breathtaking. I caress her cheek, triggering her to reach for my hand.
My heart stills, when the smile trembles off her lips. I hold my breath as she sits up and holds out her hand in front of her. She looks back at me, then her hand once again.
Her eyes look terrified, when she looks back at me a final time. Her mouth flaps open and closed like a fish. I feel
like I’m drowning with each second.
I shake my head. I decided what I want. She heard what I said last night. This is a part of what I come with. I fold my arms across my chest, my muscles flexing with tension.
“You’re supposed to say, ‘oh, my God, Brax. It’s beautiful. I love you,’” I say bitterly, mocking her voice.
“Its…beautiful isn’t the word. Oh, my God, beautiful doesn’t even describe it,” she pulls her hand to clutch it against her chest. “Thank you.”
“But…,” I sigh.
“So, we going to go from Heather slapping the shit out of Braxton and telling him not a chance to. Hey guys, we’re engaged overnight,” Heather says incredulously.
I shrug my shoulders. “This has not been overnight for me. I don’t give two fucks about anyone else. I bought that ring for you. I bought our house for you. I added your name to my accounts for you—”
“Wait, you what?” she gasps.
“We did things your way. That shit ain’t me. You made choices that brought us here. I’m not about to go back to hiding who you are to me,” I grumble.
“Okay, you don’t want to go back to hiding, but engaged, Brax?” She shakes her head, pulling her hand from her chest. “You didn’t even ask me.”
“You’re damn right I didn’t. You would have told me, no. Take all of me, Heather, or stop killing me,” I say tightly.
Her head jerks back and I know I’ve fucked up. I could beat my own ass. My patience has burned out. I understand where her reservations come from, but I feel like I’m dangling from a building. Every day I think she’s going to pull me up, only to have her lower me again. Holding on enough to breathe, but never enough to truly live. I can’t be her life support of my oxygen is cutoff too.
I close my eyes, when she jumps from the bed, wrapping the sheets tightly around her body. When I open them again, I see the real Heather come out. The one that has been my hero, since I was a kid. The fire in her eyes sears me to my core.