Wanting Us

by E Molgaard

  “I just want to have a fun night with Liam. To see him smile.”

  “Well he’s not going to be able to wipe the smile off his face when he sees you.” She starts laying dresses on my bed and grabbing shoes. “Are you going to finally tell him you love him?”

  I shrug my shoulders as I look over the dresses. “I don’t know. I’ve known I loved him for a while now but there hasn’t been a right time to tell him. I don’t want to tell him while he’s still dealing with missing his mom because I’m afraid his sadness will out way his happiness and he won’t react how I hope.”

  Mack walks over to me and pulls me into a hug. “Whenever you tell him he will be so happy because I know that he loves you back.”

  “I know. I just miss him. I see him every day but he's just not himself. I don’t want to rush his grief so I just try to be there for him but I miss the spark that used to be in his eyes.”

  “You are doing great being there for him. When we hung out a couple of days ago it felt like old times. He was joking around with Drew and was all over you. Maybe he’s finding his happiness again.”

  I nod agreeing with her and pick up the burgundy knee length flowy dress. I haven’t worn this dress in a while but it is one of my favorites. I love the little frill at the end of the long sleeves and at the neck line. I pull off my robe to put on the dress but Mack’s whistling stops me. “Hot damn. You’re pulling out all the guns tonight.” I pose for her in my black lace matching bra and panty set and my black thigh high tights as she fans herself.

  We both bust out laughing as Mack helps me into the dress. I walk over to the mirror to look at myself and as I run my hands down my dress, I wonder if Liam will want to remove it later. “Liz you look beautiful.” She looks at her phone showing me the time. “You better get going. You don’t want to be late.”

  I wrap my arms around Mack, hugging her tight. “I love you Mack. Thank you for helping. I hope Drew can put a smile on your face. Just remember I’m here for you if you need me.”

  “Love you too. Have fun tonight. Liam won’t be able to keep his hands off of you.” I give her another quick hug before grabbing my purse and rushing out the door.

  Liam is waiting for me outside the restaurant and he looks very handsome in his navy suit while leaning against the building. He’s looking at his phone and I decide to have a little fun.

  Liz: You look hot.

  I know the second that he saw the text because his whole body language changes. It’s like he’s lighter. He looks up from his phone with the smile I love as he looks for me. When his eyes land on me, I finish walking to him and he pulls me to him. “You’re beautiful.”

  “Thank you. I love this suit on you.” I grab the edge of his jacket and pull him closer to me, kissing him. A group of girls walk by chuckling make me pull back from him and rest my head on his chest, hiding my heated cheeks.

  “Should we go inside?” I nod, wrapping my arm around his back as his arm goes around my shoulders and we walk into the restaurant. The hostess seats us right away and as we look over the menu, Liam draws circles on my palm as I rub my foot up and down his leg under the table. “How was your day today? Did you get the information you needed from the dealer?”

  “I actually had a really good day. The dealer still won’t speak but I think it’s because he doesn’t know anything but the guy that was supplying him finally decided to talk to us. He was able to tell us that the guy leading the drug trade in North Carolina goes by Joe but he doesn’t know his full name. He did, however, give me the name of the guy that delivers him the drugs. There’re so many layers to the drug trade industry and I’m hoping the driver will be able to give us more information. We just now have to find him and try to track him back to the source.”

  “What happens if the driver takes you outside of Raleigh?”

  “Then we partner with the police there.”

  I flip my hand over interlocking our fingers. “You’re being safe, right?”

  “Of course. I want to be able to come home to you after every shift.” He brings my hand up to his mouth and kisses my knuckles. Before I get to tell him that I couldn’t live without him, our waitress walks up to the table taking our drink and appetizer order.

  Liam stands as the waitress walks away, leaning over me and giving me a kiss. “I’m going to the restroom. I’ll be right back.”

  I smile up at him and watch him walk towards the back of the restaurant. When he’s out of sight, I pull out my phone and text Mack.

  Liz: He loved the dress. Thanks for your help!

  I see the three dots pop up showing me Mack is typing and my smile widens, waiting. I hear Liam’s chair pull out before Mack responds so I lock my phone. “Wow, that was quick.”

  “Hello Elizabeth.” I freeze as his voice rings out. No. Why is he here? Please let it not be him. I thought I was done with him. I slowly look up and my worst fear is right in front of me.

  “What the hell, Bryan?”

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Liam

  I know Liz planned this dinner for me but I want this dinner to be special for her. I’ve been waiting to tell Liz that I love her and I think tonight will be the right moment. When I walk out of the bathroom, I pull our waitress to the side really quick. “Hey I was wondering if I could go ahead and order dessert. And can you have a message written on it?”

  “Absolutely. Do you want us to bring it out as you finish your meals? What would you like it to say?”

  I nod. “I love you.”

  The waitress smiles at me. “That’s very sweet. I’ll make sure we bring it out right as your finishing dinner.”

  “Thank you.” I head back towards the table but stop when I see someone sitting at the table with Liz. Who is that? Based on Liz’s body language, it’s not someone that’s welcome. I start to head over there but stop once again as Liz moves and I get a glimpse of who it is. Bryan. What the hell is that asshole doing here?

  A waiter walks by me and I grab onto his arm, stopping him. “Excuse me sir can you please call the police. That’s my girlfriend sitting over there and she has a restraining order against the man that is sitting with her.”

  The waiter looks a little worried as he looks between me and our table. “Yes sir.”

  He takes off in the other direction and I start walking over to the table and as I approach, I hear Bryan say, “Elizabeth don’t threaten me. You’re not calling anyone. If you wanted me arrested, you would have called the cops the first time I called.” He’s been calling her?

  Liz shuffles in her seat a little as she looks around. “You need to leave.”

  Bryan stands up from the table and walks over to Liz, grabbing her arm and pulling her out of her chair. “Not without you.”

  Red is invading my vision as he places his hand on her. It takes me two second to reach them. I grab a hold of his wrist, removing his hand from her arm and step in between them. “Don’t you fucking touch her.”

  Bryan looks me up and down with his evil grin. “Oh Elizabeth, did you not tell your boy toy that you have been accepting my calls? It’s not very nice to lead him on. Especially after his mom died.”

  That’s it. I get into his face with my hands in a fist next to me waiting for him to say something else. “What did you...”

  “Liam no.” Liz gets in between us, pushing me back. “Everyone is watching.” She looks over her shoulder at Bryan. “Please leave us alone before they call the police.”

  “I’ve already called the police.”

  “You did what?!” Why is she yelling at me now?

  “I got a waiter to call the police. He’s violating your restraining order.”

  “That’s not your call. That’s my...” Right in that moment two police officers walk into the restaurant and head straight for us.

  “Hi, I’m Officer Matthews. We got a call about a disturbance and a restraining order violation. Can you tell me what’s going on here?”

  I look to Liz waiting for
her to say something but she just has her arms crossed over her chest, glaring at me. Fine, I’ll tell them. “His name is Bryan Adams and he’s violating the restraining order my girlfriend, Liz, has against him.”

  Liz lets out a big huff and walks away from us. “This is ridiculous.”

  I quickly throw a hundred dollars on the table because I know we aren’t finishing this dinner and rush after her. As I walk past the officers, I hear them say, “Let’s take this outside.”

  Once I get past all the onlookers, I find Liz outside the restaurant pacing back and forth mumbling to herself. “Why didn’t you tell the cops you have a restraining order against him? Why are you still protecting him?”

  “Don’t you fucking dare say I’m protecting...” The second police officer steps up next to Liz interrupting her.

  “Ma’am, can you please tell me what happened?” The officer escorts Liz over to a bench so they can talk as the other officer talks to Bryan. I lean against the wall running my hands over my head trying to figure out what I did wrong. Why is Liz so upset with me? He fucking touched her. Why isn’t she mad at him?

  After a few minutes Liz and the officer get up from the bench and while the officer walks past me, Liz comes up to me. “Let’s go.”

  Confused, I look between her and the officers wondering what is going to happen, but instead of questioning it, I follow behind her. As we pass the officers and Bryan, I hear Officer Matthews say, “Bryan Adams you’re under arrest for violating the restraining order that is against you.” Bryan yells out some threats but I don’t hear them all as I follow Liz around the corner to her car.

  On the drive home we’re both silent. I started to talk to her when we first got into the car but she just shook her head silently telling me to shut up. I can feel her fuming next to me and I know when we get back to my place all hell is going to break loose.

  I make sure to give her space as we walk up the stairs to my apartment. Once Liz has the door unlocked, she flings it open making it slam against the wall. Oh shit. I quietly close the door behind me and turn to her see her throw her purse on the kitchen counter and stop, facing away from me. I stand a couple of feet away from her waiting for her to start yelling but she just stands there. After a couple of minutes I break the silence. “Liz I…”

  She whips around to face me. “You didn’t have the right.”

  “What?! Of course I had the right. You obviously weren’t going to. He’s been calling you and you didn’t report him then. He’s going to keep harassing you.”

  “First of all, he’s hasn’t called me since the week of fourth of July when you answered my phone. So, I thought he had moved on. And second, you don’t know what I was going to do. Did I have my phone out to call the police right in the moment? No. But maybe I was going to call once I got him to leave because I didn’t want to cause a scene at the restaurant.”

  “He put his hands on the woman that I love. What did you expect me to do?”

  Liz face softens a little as tears start to fill her eyes. “No. You don’t get to say that to me right now.” She grabs her bag and walks past me towards the door.

  “Liz where are you going?”

  “Home. You can’t say that to me because you are trying to win a fight.” Realization hits me that I just told her I was in love with her for the first time while in an argument. God, I’m an idiot.

  “Liz…wait.” I try to reach her before she walks out but she quickly turns on me, stopping me in my tracks.

  “Don’t follow me.”

  The door closes behind her as I slam my hand down on the counter. “Fuck.” How could I tell her I love her in an argument? I’ll never be able to take that back. I really want to go after her and apologize, but I know that will only make things worse. So instead I head in the opposite direction to my room, closing the door behind me. Tomorrow I’ll have to find a way to apologize.

  Chapter Thirty

  Liz

  Last night was awful. I can’t believe Bryan showed up. I thought I was done with him. He hadn’t tried to reach out to me since Liam answered his call while we were at the beach. I figured Bryan realized that I had moved on and so he was as well. I was obviously wrong because apparently Bryan has been stalking me to some degree since he knew I was at Jimmy V’s and about Liam’s mom. And that was probably the most unnerving feeling about seeing him again.

  I just wanted him to get away from me. I’m glad Liam came back when he did because I was actually scared that Bryan was going to try to drag me out of the restaurant. Watching Liam be protective over me was a real turn on but as soon as he said he called the police, I was pissed. Ever since I got this restraining order, he has said I can only do what I’m comfortable with and with him calling the cops he took that choice away from me.

  That’s what I’m pissed about. I’m not mad the cops showed up because I was going to call them after Bryan left. Before, Bryan was only calling me and not even from his own phone so I truly had no proof. But the fact that he’s gotten to the point that he’s stalking me and showing up unannounced, that’s too much. I just didn’t want to cause this huge scene in the restaurant because I wanted to enjoy my dinner with Liam. But with him calling and the cops showing up there was no way we were going to be able to enjoy dinner after that.

  Yes, I took everything out on Liam but I was pissed about how everything blew up and Liam was a part of it. So, when we got back to his apartment, I yelled at him. But I never intended to leave his apartment. I wanted to tell him how I felt and us find a way to move passed it but when he told me he loved me for the first time as part of his argument it hurt me.

  I’ve been waiting to hear him say those words or to say them myself for so long and that was not how I pictured it. To me it was almost like a dig to try to win the fight. In my heart I know Liam didn’t mean it like that but now the first time he has said he loves me will always be tainted by that fight.

  Sleeping alone last night in my old bed was almost impossible. I missed him next to me. I missed his warmth and the feeling of having his arm around me. Today at work I’ve been fighting everything in me to not fall asleep. I’m five coffees in and I still feel like if I close my eyes for longer than a second, I’ll fall asleep instantly. Luckily, Julia is keeping me busy so I’m not sitting at my desk for long periods of time. Plus, the busyness is keeping me distracted from the fact that Liam hasn’t tried to call or text me.

  I rush down the hall heading towards my desk needing to check my emails and voicemails and as I pass the break room, I run right into someone. I stumble backwards but I don’t fall because they reach out and grab me. “Sorry Liz.” I look up and recognize Frank from hospital security. “I’m just here for my afternoon snack. But don’t tell anyone I was here.” He puts his finger over his lips like he’s shushing someone. I act like I zip my lips closed and throw away the key. We both laugh and head to the front of the suite. “You guys have the best...”

  Frank’s radio interrupts him. “Code Silver. We have reports of a code silver.”

  Frank and I look at each other as we silently recognize that there’s a shooter in the hospital. Everyone’s phones then start going off notifying all hospital staff. Frank takes off out of the suite to the elevators. The elevator doors open right as he pushes the down button but he doesn’t even have a chance to react to whoever is in the elevator. Bang! Bang! Franks body jerks twice as he takes two bullets and falls to the ground. Oh my god! My whole body starts to shake but I can’t seem to move. My protective instincts kick in as I hide behind my desk when the gun comes into view as the person starts to walk out of the elevator.

  Another shot rings out as glass shatters all over the floor. Oh my god, they’re coming in here. I start to crawl away from my desk and get to my feet to run. As I stand, another shot rings out and I freeze waiting to feel the pain from the shot. “Stop right there!”

  I recognize that voice. I slowly turn around and I come face to face with the shooter who has the gun aimed
at me. “Amber?”

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Liam

  “What the hell is up with you today? You’ve kind of been in your own world and you’re not talking about Liz like you normally do. Did something happen at the dinner?” I look over to Caleb who is sitting in the driver's seat as we stake out the spot where the delivery guy is supposed to go.

  “Everything bad happened at dinner and after dinner.”

  “So, you didn’t tell her you love her?”

  “Oh, I did. Just at the worst possible moment.”

  I look back out the window staring at a busy street. “You can’t say that and leave me hanging.” I chuckle at him. “I got you to laugh. Score.”

  We both burst out laughing. “Alright. I’ll give you the short version. Bryan showed up. I called the police and Liz is now pissed at me because I did it without asking her. When we got back to my place we got into a huge fight and I let it slip that I love her by saying ‘he put his hands on the woman that I love.’ Liz didn’t take it well. I think I hurt her. I didn’t mean for it to be said like that. I want to take it back. She left last night to stay at her place and I haven’t spoken to her.”

  “What a night. First did they arrest Bryan?” I nod. “Good. And why haven’t you called her?”

  “I’m afraid if I call, she’ll say we’re done.”

  “You’re not done. Liz loves you and you know it. One fight isn’t going to make y’alls love disappear.” He grabs my phone from the center console. “Call her. You know you want to.”

  He waves the phone in my face and I try to hold in my laugh as I grab the phone. “Okay.” I dial Liz’s number and put the phone to my ear, wishing that she will answer. After six rings her voicemail picks up and I hang my head. “Hey Liz. I’m sorry. Please call me.”