by Alison Mello
“Refuse to lose,” They shout and the boys all run to the field, leaving only Ethan and Colton in the dugout.
At first, they’re joking around, but Vincent puts a quick end to it. He tells them to pay attention to the game and to cheer their team on.
The first inning goes quickly with both teams getting an easy three outs. Though I notice Ethan and Colton snickering in the corner, I say nothing. I have faith in this team.
The second inning starts and DJ strikes the first two kids out, but the third batter gets onto first. The fourth batter pops it up and Landon misses it, but quickly throws it to second for the out. “Way to go, boys.”
DJ is up to bat. He grabs his bat and takes a few practice swings before he takes home plate. The first pitch is thrown, he swings and misses. He lets out a deep breath. “You got this, DJ,” Mason shouts from behind him. DJ steps up, and the second pitch is thrown. He swings and nails it into the outfield. He takes off running full speed and makes it to second. Mason is pumped and cheers him on as he takes the plate himself.
“Okay, Mason. Come on, buddy, keep your eye on the ball,” Billy calls to him. The first two balls thrown to him are strikes. He gets a base hit with the next strike, and the boys are getting excited. DJ is now on third and Mason is on second, and we have no outs.
Landon is up next. “You can do it, Landon,” DJ shouts from third base. This is about to get real interesting. Landon lets out a deep breath and steps up. The first pitch is a ball.
“Good eye, Landon,” Billy shouts. From what I’ve heard, Billy has had a little talk with Landon. You see, Billy was the Landon on our team. He wasn’t the best at the game, but he had the love for the game that never let him give up. Landon swings at the next pitch and misses. Colton laughs. My head whips around, and I narrow my eyes at him. He instantly stops, realizing he’s busted.
Another ball is thrown, and he swings. This time he connects, and it’s a grounder toward first. They throw him out, but DJ scores and Mason is now on second. “Yeah, Landon. That’s an RBI, buddy.” I cheer him on as he runs back to the dugout.
DJ comes running at him, jumping up and down. “That was perfect, Landon.” He hugs his friend and fist bumps him. Landon has a slight smile on his face as he takes a seat on the bench. Our two troublemakers have settled down a little. I purposely look over with a slight grin, but say nothing. They know.
The boys are having an amazing game, but we’re only up by one and it’s the final inning of the game. There are two boys on base, and there are two outs. It all comes down to this batter. Sam is on the mound, and he’s done awesome relieving DJ. Sam runs his hand down his pants and grabs the ball. He looks down at Mason, who gives him a signal. Sam nods and throws the ball. It pops up into the air directly above Landon who yells, “I’ve got it.” Everyone backs off, giving him the space he needs to make the play. He backs up, and it’s like the whole thing happens in slow motion. The ball comes down right into his glove. Landon has saved the game. The bench clears, and the entire team runs onto the field to cheer him on. I hear his mom screaming from the bleachers, and when I look over she’s wiping tears from her eyes. Landon is so proud of his accomplishment, and I’m incredibly proud of the two boys who join their team and cheer him on. “Okay, boys, calm down. We need to finish this right. Line it up.”
The boys all take the white line and go through giving the other team five and shouting good game. When they’re done, I tell them to meet me at the shed. They all gather their stuff and head over, excited they won. “How’d that feel?” They all start cheering. “I’m incredibly proud of you boys. You played hard today. What’s better is you played like a team. It was a long game since we were down two players today, but you fought hard and showed us that playing like a team pays off.” I look at Colton and Ethan, who know they were proved wrong today. “I let you get a little out of control at the end of that game because Landon made that amazing catch, but I don’t want to see that at the end of every game. We need to be good sports. When you win, I want you to remember how it felt to lose last week. We don’t want to rub it in by rushing the field like that in the future.”
“Yes, Coach,” they shout.
“Good, now bring it in.”
They pile their hands on mine and on three they shout our saying, ‘Refuse to lose.’
“Coaches, do you have anything you want to say?”
Vincent puts his hand up. “Coach Vincent.”
“I just have one quick thing.” He looks at the team with a smile and says, “Pizza’s on me for all who can join us.”
The boys all clap and cheer, excited they get pizza again this week.
Most of us meet up at the pizza parlor. There are a few people who couldn’t make it, but I’m glad Landon was able to make it. He saved the game and deserves this.
When the pizza is ready, the waitress lays it all out on a couple of tables near where we’re sitting. Ethan shocks the shit out of me when he stands and stops the kids from rushing the table. “Yo, hold up. Landon gets first dibs. It’s his catch that saved the game.” Landon smiles and steps up to the table. Ethan holds out his fist, and they bump.
“Thanks, Ethan.”
He nods and takes a seat waiting, for everyone else to eat before he does. I take a seat next to him, nudging him with my shoulder. “That’s the nicest thing I’ve ever seen you do.”
He nods. “I screwed up.”
“You did, and I understand why.”
He looks up at me. “You do?”
I nod. “I do and you know what, Ethan, you have two choices. You can continue down the path you’re on and be the town bully, or you can change and be a better person. I’m not sure how being a bully makes you feel, but I’m sure you don’t like the way your mom is treating you. So what makes you think that it’s good to treat other kids the same way?”
He looks down at his lap. “I just wish she cared.”
“I know and I wish my mom had cared too, but you know what, she didn’t. I was in the same predicament you are only I didn’t have a father backing me, you do. Talk to him and I’m willing to bet if you become a better person, Colton will too. He only does it to be like you.”
“Why?” he asks totally confused.
“Some kids are meant to lead and some are meant to follow. He seems like a follower, so lead him.” I leave him with that thought and join the rest of the crew. I hope this conversation sinks in and he starts on a better path.
Another week has flown by. I remember a time when I felt like the weeks dragged on. DJ and I had a great routine, but it was the same thing every day. Work and school, then homework, showers, and bed was pretty much our routine. We did things from time to time like watch a movie or a show but, in reality, life was quite dull until Trystan came along. Now we're always doing something, the three of us, and simple things like dinner seem like a bigger deal. Before, DJ and I would have dinner together, but it was always quiet. It was like pulling teeth to get him to talk, but to see him so animated with Trystan over baseball, wrestling, or whatever else they’re discussing is awesome. The funny thing is they even convinced me to watch professional baseball with them so they could teach me more about the game.
It's really early, but we need to get out the door for our little fishing trip. Trystan has been looking forward to this all week long. I had to laugh when Trystan told DJ that's what we were doing this weekend because my son is just like me. He told Trystan he was down as long as Trystan touched the fish. He shook his head and laughed.
"You two ready." Trystan comes into the living room where DJ is playing a game on his phone, and I'm tidying up.
“YUP!," DJ shouts like the guy from one of our TV show, Storage Wars.
"Well, let's roll then. Those fish aren't going to catch themselves." He holds open the door for us.
It's a little bit of a drive, but we arrive at this spot that Trystan tells us is great for fishing even if you don't have a boat. They have piers and docks from where you can cas
t your line.
When we step out of the truck, I take a long, deep breath of clean crisp air. I love the fresh air which is so different from the big city. We all help grab some of the gear Trystan has provided and take the short walk out to the area of the lake he wants to fish. "We could go sit on a pier and fish, but it's not as nice."
"Where are we going?" DJ asks.
"There's an area a friend of mine told me about that is very quiet and not many people use. I've fished from here once or twice."
"Cool." We continue to follow Trystan along the way until we get to this opening on the lake. The view is absolutely stunning. You can see the entire huge lake from here. It's a warm morning, and the trees around us provide the perfect shade. You can see nothing but water and trees for miles. There's a boat out on the water in the distance, but he's so far out we'll be no bother to him. Trystan pulls opens two tackle boxes and starts talking about fishing with DJ. I'm only half listening because I'm too taken in by the interaction that's actually taking place between them. My son looks at him with pure awe. He adores Trystan, and it's clear that Trystan adores DJ. The two of them stand back and Trystan shows DJ how to cast his line. The lure goes flying through the air and into the water. DJ's eyes light up with excitement.
"That was so cool."
"Now, take the rod and hold on tight. Don't let go," he warns DJ.
With a huge grin, he takes the rod and holds onto it, staring out at the water and waiting to feel the pull. "What happens if I feel it move?"
"Yank back on it hard and fast and start reeling it in." The excitement on his face is amazing.
"Okay, sugar. Here's yours." He hands me a rod with the line cast as well, and then he sends his out.
"This seems like it can get boring if you don't catch anything," DJ states, making me nervous he’s going to get bored after five minutes of fishing.
Trystan shrugs. "It depends. If you're out here alone then you're right—it can get boring, but when you're out here with people you love then life is good."
I ruffle my fingers through DJ's hair, and I'm about to say something when there's a tug on his line. He yanks it back and starts to reel it in, but whatever he caught is putting up a good fight. He pulls harder, but he's struggling, so Trystan puts down his rod to help DJ out. Trystan pulls back and tells DJ to reel it in. Unfortunately, when the hook comes back it’s empty. Whatever was on it got away.
"Oh man. I lost it."
Trystan chuckles, "It happens, kid. Just throw it back out like I showed you." It takes him a few tries, but he's finally happy with where it landed and we all get quiet.
We're all staring out at the water, taking in the sight, when DJ breaks the silence. "Did you mean what you said?"
Trystan looks over. "About what?"
DJ suddenly becomes quite shy. "Loving us?"
He nods. "I did, and your mom and I have been talking about the next step for us, but we need to be sure everyone is ready."
"Ready for what?" he asks, not sure where Trystan is going with this.
"Well, how would you feel about Trystan moving in with us?"
"That would be cool. He's there most of the time anyway, and he helps me with baseball. Will you coach again next season?"
"Only if you’re playing," Trystan teases.
"Of course. I want to be the best pitcher of all times." DJ pats his chest. There's a tug on my line, ending our conversation. I'm glad we were able to discuss this because despite the fact that Trystan and I have only been together a little over a month, I really do love him and hope we'll be together for a long time. "Pull, Mom!" DJ shouts. I pull back real hard on the line and begin reeling it in, but it's putting up a fight. Trystan offers to help, but I want to do it by myself.
"I got it." I continue yanking back on the rod, trying to get this bad boy in. I want to show them I can do this. It takes me a good few minutes, but I finally get it. Unfortunately, it's a tiny little thing that makes the two of them crack up laughing.
"You fought so hard like it was going to be this huge fish, and it's a tiny thing." DJ bends over laughing.
Trystan taps him on the arm. "Stop laughing at your mother."
But there's humor in his words. "Okay, funny boys...I'm going to stand back and watch you two. Let's see how you do."
They both reel their lines in and cast them out. They're now in competition mode to see who can catch a fish first. Trystan gets a pull on his line, but when he reels it in he only has some seaweed, so he gets his lure out there quickly before DJ can manage to catch anything.
It seems to be taking a while for either of them to get a bite. DJ keeps trying to cast his line in different areas, hoping he'll get something. He's a smart kid as he keeps watching what Trystan does so he can learn what to do. He lets the line sit and then slowly reels in a very short distance to make the lure move in the water. DJ doesn't realize it but Trystan is watching him with a smile on his face. He's pleased that DJ is catching on. "Mom, I'm getting hungry," DJ says without ever taking his eye off his line.
"Okay, bud, there's food in the cooler for us. Why don't you take a break and grab a sandwich."
"I can't or Trystan will win."
I laugh, "Okay, the competition is paused for an early lunch break. We've been out here for a while now." They both reel their lines in and take a seat on the rock next to me to grab a quick bite, and quick it is. The two of them devour their sandwiches in record time and then follow it up with some chips and water.
"Ready?" DJ asks him.
"You bet." They both jump up and toss their lures into the water. Trystan has been filling us in on the types of fish out here. Catfish and largemouth bass are the most popular catches. This time they both get a quick tug on their line and it's a race to see who can pull it in quicker. They work their line to beat the other to getting their catch in, and they both pull a fish up at the same time. I'm impressed too because they each caught a nice size fish.
"Dude, we caught some bass," Trystan shouts as the two fish flop around on the ground. “We have to hurry and get them back in the water.”
"What we can't keep them?"
"Nah, I'm not a fan of eating bass."
"Hold up your lines, quick. I want a picture." I snap a quick picture, and Trystan tosses them into the water.
"That was so cool. Can we try again?" DJ jumps up and down excitedly.
"Sure, let’s go again."
We've been sitting here for another hour without a bite. DJ is starting to get bored, so we agree to wrap it up. Trystan promised Vincent he would stop by and check out the boys’ progress at Daisy's house today. Both Colton and Ethan are there with their dads working on her yard as part of their punishment for making fun of Landon.
When we get back to the truck, DJ thanks Trystan for taking us fishing and asks if we can go again. Trystan happily agrees. Trystan looks thrilled that DJ enjoyed himself. "I had fun, but next time you two can go and I'll stay home."
"What's wrong, Mom? Didn’t catch anything?" DJ teases.
“I caught a little something.” I wink at DJ who bursts into laughter over my joke.
When we pull up to Daisy's a short time later, the boys are hard at it in the yard. Trystan stops the truck, and we all climb out. Vincent tells the boys to take a water break. It's only mid-May, but it's a really warm day. "Coach." The boys come over with their water. "Look." Ethan points to the front lawn that looks so much better, and it's not even done yet.
"You boys are doing a good job."
"Thanks. Our dads are trimming their hedges too. We're going to take all the yard waste and get rid of it when we're done."
"That's awesome, Ethan. Doesn't it feel good to do something positive for someone?"
He nods. "Yeah, I guess it does. Landon tried to come out and help, but Dad sent him back inside."
Trystan shrugs. "That's up to your dad. If he feels that's what’s best, then you have to respect it."
Colton finally says, "Coach, I'm sorry I was a jerk
. It really isn't cool."
"What made you change your mind? Are you sorry because you got in trouble?"
"Nah, my dad took all my stuff away and now we know what it feels like to have what Landon has. It sucks to not have my games or a phone." He shrugs. "It made me realize how lucky I am."
"That was the point." His father puts his arm around him. "Hi, I'm Nick." He holds his hand out to Trystan.
"Hi, I’m Trystan, and this is Stella and DJ."
"Sorry I haven't been around, but I work for the county so my hours can be crazy."
"I understand. Thanks for being here with him today."
"No problem. I think Vincent and I both learned our boys need us to be around a little more right now. They're at a tough age."
I notice DJ looks at the ground. I think this father/son stuff is hitting a little too close to home for him. "Well, we should let you boys get back to work," I announce, trying to remove DJ from this situation.
"Absolutely," Trystan agrees. "Good work boys. Keep it up."
The three of us take off back to my house, and when we get there DJ goes straight to his room. Trystan looks concerned. "Did I miss something?"
I sigh and pull Trystan to the couch. "I think that little father/son moment back at Daisy's messed him up a bit."
"Shit. I wasn't thinking."
I shake my head. "I wasn't either."
"Can I go talk to him?"
"Be my guest. Good luck, puberty is hitting hard."
He laughs, "I've been there."
I let out a slow, steady breath before I knock on the door lightly. "DJ, it's Trystan. Can I come in?"
It takes him a minute, but he finally says, "Come in." From the sound of his voice, I bet he's been crying.
"Hey, what's wrong?" He shrugs, but says nothing. "Is it because you miss your dad?" I can see he's fighting back his tears, and it near breaks me. "You know it's okay to cry, right. I mean, I know you’re a boy and you probably think you have to be strong, but the strong cry too.