“You know Chase,” Tenley said, clapping when the next batter was announced. “Always willing to do what’s best for the team.”
“Yeah.” Jayda considered how much he’d already sacrificed for this team. Everything. Their home. His marriage. His family. Being a full-time dad to his little girl. She was trying to let go of the past, but every once in a while, someone said something to remind her, and a little of the old resentment resurfaced.
“Hey, you okay?”
Jayda realized she hadn’t even reacted when the pitcher walked another batter, loading the bases with one out. “Uh, yeah, I was just thinking.”
“About?”
“How these guys ever find a healthy balance in their lives. There’s so much pressure on them. The game, the fans, the team demands so much from them. How are they supposed to have anything left to give to their families?”
Tenley looked at the supportive families all around them. “They manage. I won’t say it’s easy being married to a professional athlete. It’s not. And I’m not going to lie, I worry about how I’m going to handle raising a baby basically on my own for eight or nine months of the year. But I know we’ll get through it.”
Jayda had thought the same thing when she and Chase were just starting out. But she’d been wrong. She hadn’t been prepared for the demands of being a ballplayer’s wife. She’d thought she was, but when she realized she had to sacrifice her life for his, she decided the price was too great.
“Do you ever feel you’re the only one making all the sacrifices?” Jayda groaned along with the rest of the crowd when the batter hit a line drive to the second baseman, who made the inning-ending double play look effortless.
“Sometimes,” she admitted. “But that’s usually right around the time they’re in the postseason stretch, and I know there’s light at the end of the tunnel. I keep telling myself I just have to make it through the next month or two, then I’ll have Rowan all to myself.” She laughed. “Usually by the time spring training rolls around, I can’t wait for him to get back at it so I can have some alone time again.”
Jayda smiled, imagining she’d feel the same way. She’s always loved spending time with Chase, but she valued her alone time too.
“It must be weird for you,” Tenley said. “Having been through all this before. I mean, wasn’t Chase’s career the reason you guys broke up?”
“It was a part of it,” Jayda admitted, watching Rowan throw a strike that caught the batter looking. “But I’m beginning to realize the bigger part was me not being ready to accept Chase’s help.”
“What do mean?” Tenley asked before taking a sip of her soft drink.
“Married couples are supposed to share everything, right? Secrets, dreams, finances, goals. It wasn’t like that for us. As far as I was concerned, my problems were my own. If something was bothering me, I’d try to work it out by myself. I always tried to pay my own bills, and I kept a separate bank account because I never wanted to be dependent on anyone.”
“I can respect that,” Tenley said. “When Rowan and I got married, it took some convincing before I agreed to open a joint account. I knew how hard he’d worked to get where he was, and I had a hard time seeing his money as our money.”
“But you’re okay with it now?” Jayda asked, wondering if she ever would be.
“I still make my own money,” Tenley said, applauding when her husband struck out the batter. “Which I usually spend on all the things I need. But Rowan insists on taking care of all the household expenses. I wasn’t comfortable with it at first, but I figured it wasn’t worth fighting over. He’d been paying all those same bills when he lived alone, and it’s not like he couldn’t afford it.” She laughed. “His biggest problem is figuring out how to spend all that money he makes. Just like Chase, I’m sure.”
“Yeah, I guess it’s just weird for me. I’ve always worked hard and struggled financially. I don’t know any other way. And I watched Chase work so hard to get here. He was dirt poor growing up, and it’s just hard for me to let go of that image of him.”
“Well, money is the least of your worries now, girl.” Tenley grinned, nudging Jayda with her shoulder. “Too bad. You’ll just have to get used to it.”
Jayda knew her dilemma would sound ridiculous to most people, but the fear of losing her identity was a very real concern for her. “I just don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have to work. I mean, I’ve thought about going back to school—”
“Then why don’t you?”
“I don’t know.” Jayda sighed. “It’s not like I was a great student. I was always too busy back then to focus on school the way I should have.”
“But now you could. And you could start out with just a class or two.” Tenley sighed when Rowan walked the next batter he faced. “You know, get a feel for it before you dive in and commit to a degree program.”
“Yeah, that’s what Chase said.” Jayda smiled and shook her head when Dani, the fiancée of one of Chase’s teammates, leaned in and offered them both some of her caramel popcorn. “No, thanks.” She thought of the life she’d be leaving behind. “Aurora is literally the only place I’ve ever lived. It would be weird leaving it behind.”
“I’m sure you’d miss your family and friends at first,” Tenley said. “But you’d have Chase and Cadence.” She looked around. “And all of us. We’re like a family. We come to every home game to cheer the guys on, meet up to watch the games at someone’s house when they’re on the road. It’s nice, having friends who know what you’re going through.”
Jayda didn’t have time for much of a social life back home, but if she agreed to move in with Chase during the regular season, she’d having nothing but time to develop new interests and cultivate new friendships. The more she thought about it, the more she liked the idea of stepping out of her comfort zone and building a life with Chase and their daughter. There were just two little problems: her father and their business.
***
Chase was on a high after their win. One more and they’d have done it. Won the World Series. The fact that he had a chance to earn one of those coveted rings still felt surreal. It would serve as a constant reminder every day for the rest of his life that he’d accomplished something special. That he’d set a goal, worked his ass off, and accomplished it. It would be a symbol that his life had counted for something… a reason for his daughter and Jayda to be proud of him.
“Penny for your thoughts,” Jayda whispered, curling into his side.
He’d been too wired to sleep when he got home, so after he sneaked into Cadence’s room to kiss her good night, they’d made love. Now they were snuggling under a blanket in the family room, watching highlights of the game on his big screen as the commentators talked about his team’s chances of going all the way.
“I was just thinking about everything. You know, what it took to get here. How crazy it is that I’m actually here, on the verge of winning a freaking World Series championship with my team. It doesn’t even seem possible. I’m almost afraid I’ll wake up and realize it’s all a dream, ya know?”
“I can imagine.” She brushed her thumb over his finger, where his wedding ring had once rested. “If you did wake up and find it was all a dream, but I was still here with you, would you be okay with that?”
He knew what she was asking him. Would he survive without baseball, which one day he would have to, if he still had her? There was no question in his mind that he would. It was tough to imagine a life without the game he loved, but it was even harder to imagine a life without Jayda now that he had her back. “Yeah, I would.”
She looked up at him. “You sure about that?”
“Jay, I love baseball. This game has been my life for a long time, but when it’s over, it’s over. I want to go out on top. I don’t want to play past my prime or try to hold on to my glory days because I can’t face the end. That’s not me.”
“I know. But we don’t have to think about that now. You have a lot of years ahead of you.”
“And if it did?” she whispered. “What then?”
“By then, I hope that you’d be my wife again and I’d be looking forward to the future with you.”
“What would that future look like?” she asked. “If it didn’t include baseball?”
It wasn’t as though he’d never thought about what he would do when he retired. He didn’t like to dwell on it, but the possibility crept into his mind from time to time. Especially during the off-season, when he had too much time on his hands and often got lonely.
“Well, you know I’d like to have more kids. If you wanted to work, I wouldn’t mind being a stay-at-home dad for a while.”
She giggled. “Somehow I can’t picture that.” When he frowned, she smoothed the lines in his forehead with her fingertip. “Don’t look at me like that. You’re a great father. But you’ve always been so active, so busy pursuing your dreams. It’s hard for me to imagine you being content staying home playing Mr. Mom while I go out to work.”
“Do you think you’d like to keep working on cars?” He kissed her palm before resting it against his cheek. “Maybe have your own shop?”
“I don’t think so. I don’t regret any of the time I’ve invested in keeping my father’s business afloat, but I don’t want to do that for the rest of my life. I think I’d like a more mobile business, something I could do from anywhere. That way if you got traded or we wanted to go back to Aurora during the off-season, we could.”
“I love that you’re thinking about stuff like that.” He grinned, feeling his heart flutter.
“Of course I’m thinking about it. How could I not when I’m here with you, and I know you’ll be spending the off-season with us? If things continue the way they have been, I can’t imagine letting you leave me behind when spring training starts.”
“Yeah, that’s not gonna happen, just so you know.” He was never letting her go again. “So have you thought about what you might like to do?”
“Well, I’ve been thinking about maybe studying web design. I messed around with it when the shop needed a website, and it was kind of fun. There seems to be a demand for it. It’s mobile. And I’ve always been pretty good with computers.”
“Have you started looking into options, as far as school?” As far as he was concerned, the sooner she got the ball rolling, the better. Every little step she took to plan for a different kind of life for herself felt like taking a step closer to him.
“No, but I will. I think I’d like to study online for the most part. I’d probably have to take the exams at the local college, but that’s not a big deal, right?”
“It shouldn’t be.” School would end for her right around the time his regular season was starting. It would be perfect. Maybe she could even bring Cadence to some away games when she was off school for the summer. “I like the way things are falling into place for us, don’t you? It makes me wonder why it seemed so impossible for us to work it out last time.”
“It was because I was stubborn.”
“No, it wasn’t.” He wouldn’t let her blame herself. Their divorce was as much his fault as it was hers. Maybe more. “It was because I was selfish. I thought my career was the be-all-to-end-all. That wasn’t right. I should have considered how every decision I made would affect you and our family.”
She smiled. “I’d say we’ve both grown up a lot since the divorce, wouldn’t you?”
Divorce. Ugh, he hated that word. “It would have been better if we could have grown together. I hate that we put Cadence through all this only to realize that we belong together.”
“Overall, I think we did okay with her. She’s a happy, well-adjusted little girl. What more could we ask for, right?”
“I guess you’re right.”
Instead of punishing himself for all the things he’d done wrong, maybe he should start thinking about the things he’d done right. Like helping to raise an amazing little girl who still thought he was the greatest dad in the world. He knew she felt that way because she told him, like, all the time. And he never got tired of hearing it.
“She’s my world,” he whispered, brushing his lips across Jayda’s hair. “Just like her mom is.” He was shocked when, a few seconds later, he heard her sniffling. “Hey.” He curled his hand around her cheek, lifting her face to meet his. “What’s this all about? Why’re you crying, baby?”
“I had everything,” she said, closing her eyes. “A husband who loved me. A beautiful baby. An opportunity for an amazing life with you guys, and I gave it all up. For what? So I could try to keep my brother off the streets? My father out of the hospital? I tried so hard to take care of them that I forgot to take care of myself.”
He hated to see her cry almost as much as he hated to see Cadence cry. It broke his heart. “I love that you tried to take care of them, sweetheart. It just proves how loyal you are.”
“But I wasn’t loyal to you, and you were my husband.” She covered her face with her hands, brushing away her tears. “You deserved my loyalty above anyone. I took vows. I promised to be with you through anything life threw at us. And I bailed on you. I gave up on us. I hate that I did that.”
He knew they had to have these conversations. They were important if they ever wanted to move through the pain of the past, but he still hated to see her torture herself over things she couldn’t change.
“You made mistakes.” He skimmed her lips with his. “So did I. Do you think we can just agree to forgive each other and move on?”
She rested her head against his shoulder. “I’d like that. I’m sorry for breaking down on you like that.”
He kissed her forehead. “Don’t be sorry. Anytime you need a shoulder, mine will always be right here.”
Chapter Sixteen
They’d won the World Series the very next game, and the celebration seemed to last for days. No one wanted it to end. Not the players, their families, or the hometown fans who celebrated right along with them, with parties, parades, and tributes.
But they were finally back home now, in Jayda’s little house in Aurora, and it felt as if she’d been away for months instead of a week and a half. The house was blessedly quiet. Chase had taken Cadence to school, and Jayda was cleaning up the kitchen after their family breakfast. If this was a taste of domestic bliss, she wanted more.
“Hey, gorgeous.” Chase’s voice made Jayda look up, and he smiled as he looked her up and down. “Looks like you were somewhere else.”
“I didn’t even hear you come in.” She slipped into his arms. “Did you go in and meet Cadence’s new teacher?”
“I did.” He kissed her. “She seems nice.” He laughed. “I guess she heard I was divorced because she suggested we meet for coffee sometime.”
Jayda scowled, pulling back. “That was a little unprofessional, don’t you think? Is she even allowed to date the father of one of her students?”
If there wasn’t a rule against it, there should be. Jayda had met the pretty young blonde several times. She was a second-year teacher, and it was obvious she loved her job and her students. And Cadence adored her. Jayda had always liked her too. Now she wasn’t so sure.
“Look at you, getting all jealous.” Chase chuckled. “I’m not gonna lie, it’s kinda hot.”
She shoved his chest, pushing out of his arms. “Oh, shut up. You would like it, you egomaniac.” Jayda knew women hit on Chase every day, probably dozens of times a day, but that didn’t mean she had to like it.
“You know, if you don’t like the idea of me being a free agent, you could do something about it.” He wiggled his left hand in front of her face. “Put a ring on it. That would send the message loud and clear.”
She was glad Chase had never been the kind of guy who’d shied away from wearing a ring. He obviously couldn’t wear it during a game, but that was the only time he’d taken it off.
“I’m thinking about it.” She stole a quick kiss before she slipped out of his arms. “But right now I have to get ready for work or I’ll be late. I told my dad I’d be in by ten. I’m sure there’s a mountain of work waiting for me.”
He wiggled his eyebrows as he gave her a thorough once-over. “You sure I can’t lure you back to bed?”
She giggled. They’d already made love once that morning, but she loved that he couldn’t seem to get enough of her. “Rain check, big guy. I promise.” She leaned against the door frame, just out of his reach. “So what are you gonna do today?”
“I thought I’d check out that new gym, maybe see about hiring a trainer while I’m here. I’d like to build a little more muscle during the off-season.”
His body was already drool-inducing. She couldn’t imagine it being any more perfect.
“Maybe I’ll do some grocery shopping.” He opened her fridge. “Since you’ve been away, there’s not much in here. You want me to get anything special?”
It was a little thing, but the thought of him doing something for her to alleviate some of her burden reminded her how lucky she was to have him back in her life. “Whatever you want to get is okay with me. You know what Cadence likes, so as long as we cover the basics, we should be fine.”
“I’ll make dinner tonight,” he said, closing the fridge. “After I pick Cadence up from school. Salmon okay?”
“Sounds wonderful.” Chase had always enjoyed experimenting in the kitchen during the off-season. He claimed it gave him something to do, and since most of his meals were amazing, she certainly wasn’t going to complain.
“Are you, uh, going to talk to your dad today?” He looked uncomfortable as he crossed his arms and leaned against the counter, watching her. “You know, about us? Where we’re at? What we’re thinking?”
Obviously her father knew she and Chase were getting closer. She wouldn’t have taken time off work to attend his games if they weren’t, but since she hadn’t given him specific details, he was still in the dark about her plans.
Make Up Call (Summer Rush #3) Page 16