Love on the Free Side

by Mariah Ankenman

  Who is this cowboy do-gooder, and why is he always around Jamie?

  Could this asshole be the reason she hadn’t called it a day and packed up for the city? Were his tiny pushes not enough because she had some hero wannabe stepping in to fix her problems?

  Slamming his fist into the large pine tree beside him, he held back a curse. Sharp, throbbing pain radiated from his fingertips through his arm into his shoulder. His foot pulsed, reminding him how well that particular rage release worked last time.

  “Stupid fucking forest.” Though he wanted to shout the words, he mumbled them softly. He wasn’t sure how far voices carried out here, and he didn’t want to risk being discovered. With his damn luck, Cowboy-Saves-the-Day would come running out of the house and pound his ass into the dirt.

  Which brought him back to the fact the jerk was still there. The lights went on in the bedroom over an hour ago. They were off now. Jerkoff’s truck still parked in the driveway.

  It didn’t take a genius to put two and two together.

  “You ungrateful slut.” He hurled the insult at the house, quietly still, but with enough venom to ease his growing fury. So, Jamie had a protector who was solving her problems and, presumably, warming her bed.

  Didn’t matter. He knew they were meant to be. Wouldn’t be the first time he had to pursue her. She could run all she wanted; he’d always follow.

  The subtle approach wasn’t working. Tiny hints and small inconveniences weren’t doing the trick. Truthfully, he hadn’t thought they would, but he’d hoped she’d open her eyes and see the light.

  No, not his Jamie. She was strong, fierce, fucking amazing. He loved her so damn much. Why couldn’t she see it? What did he have to do to show her how perfect they were together?

  Turning from the house, he trudged back through the woods.

  Time to execute Plan B.

  Subtle wasn’t working. He had to be more direct, more…extreme.

  He could do extreme. He would do anything to get Jamie back home, back where she belonged, back…with him.

  Chapter 20

  “You are a sexy beast,” Tony crooned to the stainless steel appliance in front of him.

  He flicked his wrist, lowering the flame on the front burner. Gas, far superior to electric. There were some things you could cook better with an old school flame. The flavors of the food behaved differently when fire called to them. Jamie’s previous chef may have been an ass, but the guy knew his cooking equipment.

  Flipping the omelet with an expertise that came as second nature now, he eyed the dual ovens inches from his thighs. He couldn’t wait to cook some tempting morsels in those babies.

  At the thought, his mind wandered to temptations of the carnal variety. The kind he’d enjoyed last night. A damn good thing he and Jamie had never done that years ago when they were dating.

  Dios mío!

  If he’d known how amazingly explosive they were together, he didn’t think he would have had the strength to end things with her.

  And see how well that worked out, idiot.

  Okay, so it seemed his grand sacrifice hadn’t been all that sacrificial in reality. He had to admit there was a bit of truth to what Jamie had said. A lot of truth to be honest. He knew she never would have strayed. Cruelty of that caliber wasn’t in her nature. The only excuse he had to offer was he had been young, stupid, and scared. He wasn’t young or scared anymore. Stupid…another matter entirely.

  Irritation ate at his gut, thinking of how Jamie wanted to keep their relationship—no, affair she’d called it—purely physical. He could understand her reluctance. He’d hurt her years ago, and it was hard to trust in someone again after they wounded you. But, dammit, he didn’t want a strictly sexual liaison. He knew most of the guys who worked for him would like to smack him upside the head for the thought, but…

  Jamie is special.

  She had meant something to him. Still did. No matter what happened in their past, he still cared for her, deeply. After last night…damn.

  His body tightened with anticipation just thinking about it. They’d connected on another level. Sex had never been like that for him. He wasn’t a man-whore, but he’d had his share of lovers. Some good, some bad, most in between, but he’d never experienced a joining like he did last night with Jamie.

  Every touch of her hand lit his body up like the fourth of July. Her moans still echoed inside his brain, raising his body temperature.

  Or maybe that was the flame in front of him.

  He turned off the burner and transferred the finished omelet to the plate waiting on the counter. The fire in the kitchen dispersed, but the one inside raged on.

  Nope, definitely Jamie.

  Damn, I’m in trouble.

  “Wow, something sure smells good.”

  He turned, watching the reason for his current internal struggle walk through the kitchen door. The smell of hay and horse wafted off her, mixing with the aromas of his cooking. She must have been out taking care of Bay. The polar odors should have clashed, but they didn’t. They mixed, swirling into a familiar, homey scent that warmed something deep inside him.

  “Cheese and spinach omelet with diced ham.” He motioned for her to sit at the counter, subtly adjusting his rapidly tightening pants.

  Damn, she looks beautiful this morning.

  Wearing jean cutoffs, a black tank top with a short-sleeved, plaid button up open over it, and a pair of worn, brown cowgirl boots, she looked like the quintessential farmer’s daughter come to life. Her brown hair loose and wild, her face radiant with a post-coital glow—something he’d gladly take credit for.

  “You look amazing.”

  She blushed at his compliment. Grabbing her fork, she tugged her plate closer, spearing a bite of the food. “Thanks. I feel amazing. Nothing like a night of great sex to make ya feel on top of the world.”

  She may talk a big game, but the way she quickly shoved the eggs into her mouth—sucking in a mouthful of air to cool the bite—belied her casual attitude to what happened between them last night.

  “Careful, it’s hot.” He hid a chuckle, grabbing his own plate and fork and digging in.

  “Mmmm.” She nodded, staring at her food like it held the secret to life. “Good though. Thanks. And, um, thanks for last night. It was…nice.”

  “Nice?” Bullshit.

  Nice was a sweater from your mother. Nice was holding the door open for a little old lady. What they experienced with each other in bed was about as far from nice as one could get.

  She finally glanced up, arching one light brown eyebrow. “Fine, it was amazing, stupendous, fantastic, mind-blowing. Better?”

  He grinned, making sure to curl his lips far enough to cause his dimples to pop out. Jamie couldn’t resist his dimples; she’d always said so.

  “That’s a good start.” He took a bite of his eggs, chewing and swallowing before sending her a heated glance. “But I’d also add hot, sensual, earth shattering, and the best damn sex I’ve ever had.”

  Sweet toffee eyes grew wide. Her fork paused on the way to her mouth, hanging in midair as she blinked at him like an owl. The expression so damn cute he couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle.

  “Oh, well, um…thanks.”

  “Thanks?” Not exactly the response a man wanted to hear after admitting to a woman she’d been a sex goddess. He wasn’t insecure by any means, but reciprocation was always nice.

  “You were…”

  The rest of her words mumbled out, so low he couldn’t understand. “Pardon? I didn’t catch that.”

  “You were amazing, too, okay!” The clank of her fork echoed through the kitchen as she threw it down on her plate. “You were phenomenal, like nothing I’d ever imagined. The best sex of my life. Happy now?”

  He couldn’t help but smile at her mulish attitude. She’d enjoyed herself last night as much as him. Maybe more. Jamie could try all she wanted to play this thing between them off as just sex, but he knew her, knew them. No way coul
d they keep this casual. Not with the way they set the sheets on fire. Great sex could be amazing, but what they had last night went beyond anything he’d ever experienced. For her, too, it seemed.

  They were more than just sex. Now, he had to convince her of that.

  “So, what’s on the agenda for today?”

  He finished off his breakfast, grabbing her empty plate when she shoveled the rest of her omelet in her mouth. Placing both plates in the dishwasher, he began to wash the pans and bowls he’d used to make the meal.

  “I need to go into town again.” She tipped her head back, gathering her hair into a ponytail. “I have a few more things to get. Some more stuff to set up before employees start to arrive. Plus, I want to check in with Pete about my dad’s truck.”

  He watched from the corner of his eye in fascination as she smoothed her hair, tugging a small band from her wrist over her hand, and twisted the elastic over the gathered length a few times. Once the strands were contained, she tugged once, pulling the ponytail tight. He’d seen her do it a million times when they worked together at the bakery, but it still got his motor running.

  Damn, he had it bad for the woman.

  “I can take you into town.” Finished with the dishes, he wiped his hand on a towel. “I need to take my uncle to PT anyway.”

  “Great. You can drop me off at the garage and call me when you’re finished. Shouldn’t take me too long today.”

  “How about we grab lunch after?”

  His heart shuttered when she bit her lip, reluctance filling her eyes. “I’m not sure that’s such a good idea.”

  Dammit. He knew he’d hurt her but had thought last night they’d made a break through, connected.

  Yeah, you connected all right, buddy. Connected part A in slot B.

  Holding back the growl of frustration, he reminded himself he had a lot to make up for where this woman was concerned. Good sex—no, amazing sex—didn’t solve everything. Especially when it came to women. They liked words, promises, grand gestures.

  No problem. He could do all that. And more.

  “As friends.”

  White teeth released the pouty lip he’d enjoyed only hours ago.

  “We both need to eat right? And I’m sure you’re getting sick of my cooking.”

  She snorted, eyes rolling as a smile lit her face. “No one could ever get sick of your cooking, Tony. You’re amazing, and don’t pretend you’re not.”

  Nodding his head, he graciously accepted the complement, but inside, he preened at her praise.

  “A friendly lunch it is then. My uncle is done at eleven thirty. I’ll give you a call on my way back.”

  She nodded, hopping off her stool. “Sounds good.”

  They made their way out to his truck. Once seated and out on the road, Jamie rolled down her window, letting the summer breeze caress the hand she playfully dangled. Tony kept his gaze on the road, but spared a glance to the woman beside him every so often. She looked so peaceful, so happy. Yet, moments ago, when he’d suggested enjoying a meal together, he’d seen her close up. It killed him to know he was the one responsible for the wall she’d built around her heart.

  Mierda!

  If he could go back and change things…ah, hell, he probably would have done the same thing. Stupid as it was, a small part of him still believed he’d done the right thing by ending it. He truly hadn’t wanted to be a distraction to her either. Too late to change things anyhow.

  What’s done is done. The only thing left to do was move forward.

  He turned onto the main road into town, marveling once again at how little the place had changed from the day he left to the moment he returned. Everything looked well kept, but the small town spirit of the place was still the same as it’d always been. Hominess, friendly atmosphere, Peak Town had it in spades. Something he sorely missed in the big city.

  “Hopefully, Pete will have my truck fixed today, and I can stop pestering you for rides.”

  Jamie laughed, but he didn’t join in. Driving her around wasn’t a chore. He’d gladly do it. Anything to spend more time with this amazing woman. The one he’d given up so long ago.

  God, I’m an idiot.

  Chapter 21

  “I need Death by Double Fudge and I need it now.” Jamie sent Maggie a pleading glance as she blazed her way into Cupcakes Above the Clouds. Thankfully, the petite shop owner didn’t ask, but flew into action, grabbing a plate and filling it with six of the decadent desserts.

  “Go sit at a table. I’ll grab some milk and be right there.”

  Maggie passed her the full plate, which she gratefully accepted. The shop was empty—another small blessing—not unusual for this time of day. The morning rush was over and there would be a lull until the lunch crowd. At least, that’s how it happened when she worked here almost a decade ago. Wow, had it really been that long? Some days, it seemed like yesterday, others, a lifetime.

  “Lizzy, get your butt up here!” Maggie called over her shoulder, coming out from behind the counter to the table, three bottles of single serving milk in her hands.

  “I’m a little busy with supply orders right now.”

  Her former boss sent Jamie a sly smile, shouting to the back, “I’ve got chocolate cupcakes!”

  The pounding of feet against linoleum echoed through the empty bakery. Lizzy, strawberry-blonde hair flying, breath panting, face flushed, came barreling around the corner. She hurried over to the table where Jamie sat with Maggie. “You had me at chocolate.”

  “What about the supply orders?” Jamie asked, stifling a giggle.

  “Chocolate trumps everything. Now, hand over the heavesserts.”

  “That’s not a word,” Maggie sighed.

  “Is, too. Heavenly desserts. Too big a mouthful to say them both. If I say it together I get the chocolate goodness in my tummy faster. Gimme!”

  She’d forgotten how funny the tall blonde could be. Laughing outright, she handed over a cupcake as Lizzy sat, tearing into the thing before she’d even taken the paper off.

  “Slow down, or you’ll choke,” she cautioned, worried for the woman’s safety.

  “Oh please,” Lizzy spoke around a mouthful. “I have kids. If I don’t eat fast, I don’t eat at all. I swear, nothing I put in front of them is appetizing until I take a bite, and then it’s ‘oh mommy I want some!’ I do not get it.”

  She let loose another laugh as the woman polished off the cupcake—removing the wrapper before digesting it, thank goodness.

  “So…” Her cheerfully funny former boss grabbed another from the plate. “To what do we owe this midmorning chocolate break?”

  “Jamie has something to share with us.” Maggie grabbed a cupcake of her own, carefully removing the paper before taking a small, delicate bite.

  “I never said that,” she protested, grabbing her own delicious smelling dessert.

  Both women gave her a stare of disbelief, and then Maggie patted her hand. “No one bursts in demanding Death by Chocolate unless they have something to get off their chest.”

  “Yeah, spill it.”

  Knowing this was why she came here, she took a giant bite of her cupcake. The smooth, rich chocolate flavor exploded in her mouth, immediately releasing the endorphins in her brain she so desperately needed.

  “Okay, so I did need to ask you both something.” The women watched her with expectant eyes. “Um, so, last night Tony and I…I mean, we…” Cupcake suddenly sticking to her throat, she unscrewed the cap on her milk and took a big swig. It did nothing to dislodge the lump caused by cowardice, not food.

  “You…?” The smaller of the two waved her hand in a motion to continue.

  “We, um…”

  “You bow chika wow wowed?”

  Leave it to Lizzy to revert to grade school maturity.

  Her head fell onto the table, a host of emotions coursing through her, embarrassment leading the pack. “Oh shoot, we totally did.” These women were her mentors, surrogate big sisters, she didn’t
want to talk about sex with them. But sadly, she had no one else to discuss her current predicament with.

  “Wahoo!”

  “Yes!”

  Her head popped up at the unexpected reactions. “Huh?”

  “Well, we’ve kind of been expecting this.” Maggie shook her head.

  “Yeah.” Lizzy nodded in agreement. “You two were always so sickeningly lovey dovey. And word around town is you’re back together, so it was only a matter of time before—”

  “We’re not back together!”

  Both women raised their eyebrows in disbelief.

  “We’re not.” Grabbing another cupcake—she needed about fifty more at this point—she continued. “Kind of. I mean, sort of.”

  Maggie wrinkled her nose. “How do you kind of, sort of not get back together?”

  “Sex and just sex.” Lizzy took a bite of her third cupcake. “Am I right?”

  Jamie nodded, shoving her second chocolate comfort into her mouth. She chewed and swallowed before answering. “Yeah. We agreed it would just be sex, but…”

  Maggie laid a soft hand over hers. “But now you don’t think you can stick to that deal?”

  Could she? After last night’s mind-blowing experience she had no idea. People kept sex and feelings separate all the time. As a psychologist she knew the two were separate entities. Sex, while having the possibility of containing emotions, was a purely physical act. You didn’t need one for the other. According to the talk she’d heard from her classmates and coworkers, they managed to keep the two apart all the time. Logically, she assumed she would be able to do the same. How would she know? Until last night, she’d never even had sex. Naive little her thought she could engage in some under the sheets play and keep her heart out of it, but after this morning…she wasn’t so sure.

  She could still feel Tony’s hands on her, bringing her body to the peak of pleasure. The sweet words he’d whispered in her ear echoed in her mind. Every memory of when they’d been young and in love surfaced as they’d joined last night. How the heck was she supposed to keep her heart out of that?

  With a groan, she slumped in her seat, thunking her head on the Formica tabletop. “What am I going to do?”