Beyond the Bases

by Kaylee Ryan

  The crowd picks back up as if the scene never happened, and I breathe a sigh of relief, that is until the mean girls behind us start running their mouths.

  “What kind of mother lets her kid think that Easton Monroe could be her father?”

  “Pathetic.”

  “She needs to teach her about life.”

  On and on they spew hate.

  “Like he would ever take them on,” one of them sneers. “Like he wants a ready-made family. As if.”

  Paisley whips around and points her little finger. “My East says speak from your heart. Your heart is not very nice. He loves us. My Easton, me, and my mommy are a family,” she tells them.

  I was hoping she hadn’t heard them. To prevent a bigger spectacle and cause problems for East, I gather our stuff, pick Paisley up, and we leave. We’re only missing half of the last innings, and she doesn’t need to hear this shit. I want to go off on them, but I’m trying to set an example for my daughter, and I don’t want to embarrass East more than we already have. I’m sure he’s going to regret asking us to the game.

  Instead of sticking around, I send him a text.

  Me: Hey, heading out early. You had a great game. Call me when you get home.

  I get Paisley, who is crying big fat crocodile tears, in the car and calmed down before leaving the stadium. She falls asleep on the way home, which is a good thing. I need time to process what just happened. I carry P to her room, pulling off her shoes and shutting her bedroom door.

  I’m too fired up to sit, so I find myself pacing back and forth. The more I think about what happened, the more upset I get. They can talk shit about me, but about my daughter with her sitting right there…. What kind of mother am I that I didn’t go off on them? I didn’t defend my baby. I think I was in shock that they would say those things knowing I could hear them. Paisley was so engrossed in the game, I assumed she didn’t. That’s what I get for assuming.

  Hot tears prick my eyes. My cell rings, and I see his name flash on my screen. I can’t answer. As soon as I hear his voice, I’ll lose my barely-there grip on my emotions. Instead, I send him to voice mail. The anger swirls at the pain of seeing Paisley’s tears and thinking of the way she defended him, defended us, and I did nothing.

  Thirty minutes later, I’m still pacing and still mad at myself for just rushing out of there, but I didn’t want to cause a scene. I go back and forth from it being the right answer to being a coward. I’m a mess.

  When a strong knock sounds at the door, I know it’s him. Sucking in a deep breath, I make my way to the door. As soon as I pull it open and I see him, I lose it, and the tears rush down my face.

  My fist bounces off her door, loud enough I’m sure to cause concern from her neighbors. I couldn’t give a fuck about them; all I care about are the two people who are my entire world, and the damn door is all that’s keeping me from them.

  I raise my fist to pound again, but the door swings open. Larissa is there, tears in her eyes. “Baby,” I reach for her, but she steps out of my reach, and the tears begin to fall.

  “Don’t,” she warns.

  “Larissa, can we talk about this? Carol told me what happened. I’m just as upset as you are, but pushing me away is not the answer. Nothing they said matters. Nothing.”

  My phone rings. Glancing at the screen, I see it’s my mother. I’m going to have to call her back. I slide my phone back in my pocket, ready to fight for her. It immediately rings again. Pulling it out again, I see it’s my mom, and worry rushes over me. “I’m sorry, I know we’re in the middle of a conversation, but it’s my mother, and she never calls right back. I’m afraid something might be wrong.”

  “Answer it,” she says, waving a hand in my direction. She wipes the corner of her eye, and my heart cracks seeing her tears. I never want to see her cry.

  My phone stops then starts back up again; this time I answer. “Hey, Mom, is everything okay?”

  “Fine, except for the fact that it’s been weeks since I’ve talked to my son. By the way, good game.”

  “Thanks. I’m good,” I assure her. “I talked to Dad a couple of weeks ago.”

  “That’s your father,” she scolds me.

  “I know, I’m sorry. How are you and the rest of the Monroe clan?” I ask. She rambles on, but I’m not listening. All my attention is on the woman standing in front of me, wiping away her tears. I need to end this call with my mother, tell her that I’ll call her back, but I also need this time to get my thoughts in order. I’m in for the fight of my life, to prove to her that she and Paisley are a part of me and I want them in my life for now and for always.

  “East, are you even listening?”

  “Sorry, what?” I ask, letting her draw me back into the conversation.

  “Your dad said you met someone.” Her voice is low, almost a whisper, as if it’s a secret she’s not supposed to know.

  “Yeah, I met someone,” I admit. Larissa’s eyes snap to mine. They’re still brimming with tears. “I met this woman. She’s amazing, Mom. She’s gorgeous and smart, busts her ass every day, and she has these bright green eyes that remind me of emeralds. She’s a great mom, reminds me a lot of you.” My eyes never leave Larissa’s.

  “She has kids?” Mom asks.

  “Yeah, a little girl. Her name is Paisley, and I swear to you, she stole my heart the minute I met her.” I watch Larissa as she bites down on her bottom lip.

  Mom chuckles. “How’s that going? Do you get along with her? How old is she?”

  “She just turned five, and yeah, we get along great. She asked me if I would be her daddy,” I confess as I watch a tear slide down Larissa’s cheek.

  Mom gasps. “How do you feel about that?”

  “I want nothing more than to be her daddy. It may not be my blood running through her veins, but I couldn’t love her more if it were.”

  “Oh, East,” Mom gushes. “What about her mother?”

  “I love her. I love them both.” A sob breaks from Larissa’s chest. “Listen, Mom, Larissa’s here and we were in the middle of something. Can I call you back later?”

  “She’s there? East, you should have sent me to voice mail,” she scolds.

  “I tried,” I tell her with a chuckle.

  “Sorry,” she replies sheepishly. “Call me later. Love you.”

  “Love you too, Mom.” I end the call and slide my phone back in my pocket before holding my hand out for Larissa. She takes it and allows me to lead us to the couch. She sits, and I sit across from her on the coffee table, gripping her hands in mine. “I love you, Ris, and I love Paisley. That’s all that matters to me. I don’t care who says what or who thinks what about us. All that matters to me is the two of you. I want her smiles when she comes home from school, or when she catches a fly ball. I want to tuck her in at night and read her however many princess stories it takes for her to fall asleep.”

  “She loves you too,” she says through her tears.

  I nod, because I know she does. She’s told me several times. “Then, I want to be able to climb into bed with you and talk about our day while I hold you in my arms. I want to make love to you until we’re too exhausted and have no choice but to fall asleep.” The tears are falling faster, but I push through, needing to bare my soul to her. “I know life with me won’t be easy. I have five or six years left before I won’t be able to play anymore. I know it’s a lot to ask, but I need you to take a leap of faith. Trust that we can do that. That we can be a family. I want to be her daddy, and I want you to be my wife.”

  Her mouth drops open as I lower myself to my knees. “I wasn’t sure when I was going to ask you, I wanted it to be perfect, and I need to talk to Paisley,” I admit, and she smiles through her tears. “But I want to marry you. I want you both to have my last name, and I want to have more babies with you.” I place my hand on her belly. “I know you worry, baby. But I need you to trust me. I won’t hurt either of you. All I want to do is love you, and make Paisley feel every bit like the prince
ss she is and make you my queen.”

  A laugh breaks free, and her smile is blinding. “I love you too,” she says, scooting to the edge of the couch. “My heart cracks when I think about not being with you. When I think about telling Paisley that you’re no longer going to be around. I just worry—”

  I cut her off by pressing my lips to hers.

  When the kiss ends, she admits, “She stood up for us, and I didn’t. I was too afraid to cause a scene, so I grabbed her and our stuff and hightailed it out of there. What kind of mother does that? What kind of mom doesn’t stick up for her kid?”

  “Didn’t you?” I ask her. “You showed her how to be the bigger person.”

  She laughs humorlessly. “That was you. She told them her East says to speak from your heart and that their hearts were not nice.”

  “That’s my girl,” I say, cupping her face in my hands. “I love you. You’re an amazing mother who was put into a tough situation. I need you to know that no matter what, I’m on your side. God forbid something like that happens again, but if it does, my family comes first. You and Paisley are my family.”

  “I love you,” she says, wiping her eyes.

  “Say no more. That’s all I needed to know. Trust in the love we have for one another. Trust me to take care of both of you.” I kiss her one more time. “Now, I need to take our little girl out on a date, so she and I can have a chat.” I stand and pull her with me. “You okay with me taking her out to dinner?”

  She nods, more tears tracking down her cheeks. “Yeah. I’m okay with that. She’s in her room.”

  “Love you, Ris.” I kiss her one more time then head down the hall to get our daughter. The reality that I get to call her that, that I can tell her that she can call me Daddy is humbling and exciting. It beats any win I’ve ever had in baseball.

  Paisley’s awake when I enter her room. She holds her arms open for me, and I scoop her up in my arms, giving her a big hug. “Those girls said bad things,” she tells me.

  “I know they did, princess. I’m sorry.”

  “S’okay.”

  “Hey, I thought that you and I could go out to dinner. Just the two of us.”

  “Really?” she asks, perking right up.

  “Yeah, your mom said it was okay.”

  “Is Mommy not gonna go too?”

  “Nope, this is just us. We can go have pizza and bring her leftovers.”

  “Cheese pizza?”

  “Is there any other kind?”

  “Yay!” She jumps off the bed, grabs my hand, and pulls me down the hall. “Mommy, are you sad ’cause we gonna get pizza?”

  “No, sweetie. You have fun with East and be good, okay?”

  “Okay, Mommy. Come on, East.” Still holding my hand, she tries to pull me to the door.

  Sliding my other hand behind Larissa’s neck, I kiss her slowly. “We’ll be back soon.”

  On the way to get pizza, Paisley talks about the game, how fun it was and how mad she was at the “mean girls” when they said I wouldn’t be her daddy.

  We settle in a booth, Paisley sitting across from me because “that’s what big girls do.” We order our food, and once our drinks are delivered, it’s go time.

  “Princess, you asked me a pretty important question today.”

  “I did?” I have to fight back my grin at her confusion.

  “You did. You asked me if I would be your daddy. Do you know what that means?”

  “It means that you love me and kiss Mommy and tuck me in at night.”

  “That’s right. I want to be your daddy more than anything. I also want to make your mommy my wife. I want to ask her to marry me.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “Well, Mommy would change her last name to Monroe.”

  “I want my last name to be Monroe.”

  “I would love that.” This little girl is my light.

  “So are you marrying me too?”

  I smile at this kid. Reaching into my pocket, I pull the tiny charm bracelet out. I picked it up along with the ring for Larissa before the game today. I found myself in the jewelry store earlier this week, and both items just felt right. I’ve never been more relieved of my decision than in this moment. This is the right time. It might be soon, but love is love.

  “Oh, that’s pretty,” she says, following my hands.

  “When I marry your mommy, I’ll give her a ring. This is for you. It’s a charm bracelet. Here is a baseball and a bat, and here is half a heart.”

  “Why only half?”

  “Because your mommy has the other half. I love both of you very much, and I would be honored to be your daddy and to give you my last name.” Reaching across the table, I put the bracelet on her tiny wrist. “Paisley Gray, do I have your permission to marry your mommy?”

  “And me too,” she says, bouncing on her seat.

  Her declaration has me smiling and choking up with tears. “Yeah, princess, and you too.” We finish our pizza and pack the leftovers up in a box for Larissa. All the way home, she talks about anything and everything, filling the silent truck with chatter. It’s something I never knew I was missing.

  “Hey,” Larissa says, meeting us at the door.

  “Mommy, look.” Paisley holds her wrist out. “East is gonna marry us, and we’re gonna change our names.” She looks up at me. “What is it again?”

  “Monroe,” I tell her.

  “That’s it.” She nods. “I’m gonna be Paisley Gray Monroe, and you’re gonna be Mommy Monroe,” she says as serious as can be.

  “That’s right, princess. Why don’t you go take a seat on the couch? Mommy and I will be right there.” She skips off into the other room without objection.

  “Sounds like that went well.” She’s looking up at me with a hint of a smile on her face. Almost as if she’s afraid to hope that what her daughter just told her is true.

  “It did.” I take her hands in mine and drop to one knee. “I love you, Ris. The moment I met you, I knew you were different. I just didn’t realize how meeting you would change my life. I didn’t know that not only you, but that little girl in there, would wind your way around my heart so much so that it’s no longer mine. Take a leap of faith with me, baby.” Reaching into my pocket, I pull out the little black box that holds the ring I picked out for her. “Larissa, will you do me the incredible honor of becoming my wife?”

  Tears stream down her cheeks, but her blinding smile tells me these are the good kind of tears, the kind that let you know the impact of the moment. “Yes,” she says, placing her hand over her mouth.

  Standing, I slide the ring on her finger and pull her in for a kiss. Being here with her in my arms, I realize that happiness lies in those you love and the love they give back to you. Me and my girls, we’ve got that in spades.

  It took me two months from the day I proposed to convince Larissa to give up her apartment and move in with me. Paisley was on board from day one; of course it helped that I had one of the spare bedrooms turned into a princess room for her. With Princess P on my team, we wore her down.

  It took me another four months to get her to set a date and another six after that for her to become my wife. Every day with the two of them is better than the last. There’s laughter that fills what used to be the silent rooms of my house; it’s now a home. A home with my girls.

  Today is a special day in so many ways. It’s our three-month wedding anniversary, and you can bet your ass I’m celebrating. Every fucking day is a celebration with the two of them in my life. It’s also the anniversary of the day my adoption went through, when I became a Monroe. Not a day goes by that I’m not grateful for all that my father has brought into our lives. He’s the man I want to be, hope to be for my wife and my daughter. Did I mention that as of today, I’m also officially a father?

  Today my princess officially became a Monroe. We signed the papers at the courthouse this morning and then went out to breakfast to celebrate. It was already a special day, the day I gained my father
. The man who has always been there for me. Now, I get to be that man. I get to show him what he taught me. How to be a man, how to love. How to fight for those you love. He taught me how to be a father. Not that anything has changed because of a signed piece of paper. Paisley started calling me Daddy the day I proposed to them, and never looked back. In my heart, she’s mine. I don’t need a piece of paper to prove that.

  My daughter.

  “So, Miss Monroe,” I say to my daughter. “What would you say if I told you we’re going to take a trip today?” I ask as she forks in another bite of her Mickey Mouse pancakes.

  Her eyes light up with excitement. “Where?” she asks with her mouth full, causing me to laugh and my wife to cringe.

  “Atlanta.”

  “Really?” she asks, dropping her fork.

  “Really.”

  “Yay!” she cheers, gaining us the attention of those sitting around us. She wiggles around in her chair almost tipping over; luckily her grandma is there to catch her.

  “Easy there,” my mother-in-law, Helen, says, grabbing the chair and steadying her.

  “You coming with us?” Paisley asks her.

  “She is,” I say, knowing she’s not convinced going is the best. I’ve been hounding her for two weeks now, and she keeps saying she doesn’t want to intrude. She’s family, and we need her to be there.

  “When do we leave?” Paisley asks, setting her glass of milk back on the table. She has a line across her top lip and looks like one of those Got Milk commercials.

  “After breakfast, so you need to finish up,” Larissa tells her.

  With a nod, she dives back into her breakfast with gusto, making us all laugh.

  The flight to Atlanta is a short one. Dad is waiting for us at the airport, and as soon as Paisley sees him, she runs into his arms. “Grandpa,” she says excitedly.

  I watch as my father picks her up and settles her on his hip. She’s getting too big for that, but he doesn’t see her as often as he and my mom would like. “Hey, Princess P,” he says, kissing her cheek.